


Soulbinder

by Hyperionova



Category: EXO (Band), NCT (Band)
Genre: A/B/O, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Androgyny, Angst, Fantasy, Heartbreak, Knotting, Lovehate, M/M, Mpreg, Side characters' deaths, Slow Burn, Some Fluff, Soulmates, Supernatural - Freeform, Violence, Werewolves, wolf - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2019-08-17 06:18:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 41
Words: 141,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16510940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hyperionova/pseuds/Hyperionova
Summary: When Sehun binds his soul to an Alpha in a Regnandi pack, he is only fifteen. Over the years, one tragedy after another leaves him forlorn and abandoned, his soul still longing for its binder. As an androgynous Omega in an Aequus pack, Sehun has no chance of becoming an Alpha's mate. And his soulbinder is not going to risk expatriation from his pack and family by accepting an Aequus for a mate.





	1. Foreword

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the Green Creek series by TJ Klune.

The first time he saw his mother’s nest, he experienced the same excitement that jolted through his veins every time he saw a full feeding bottle coming his way. Of course, he did not know that was called a nest at first. But it was _beautiful_ , the most magnificent thing he, a three-year-old child, could ever behold. He was so awed by it that he could not stop thinking about it for the next few days. It had held him in a complete trance.

“What is that?” he had asked his mommy, mouth agape, jaw set aslant.

His binky slipped from his lips and hit the dirty floor of the garage. _Oh, no_ , he thought. He’d have to ask his mommy to wash the binky for him before putting it back in his mouth. He’d do it himself, but everything was done for him. That was how it was. He was too small to do anything for himself. His hands were tiny. His feet were tiny. His legs and arms were short. His giant parents did everything for him. They fed him, they bathed him, they even cleaned his bum. He was cute, though. Every stranger who encountered him said so. And he believed it.

He’d never been in the garage. The old, rusty Plymouth they owned always stood in the driveway. His father used it to get to work. Sometimes, his mother drove the car to go to the grocery store.

He never liked how the car smelled.

“What is it?” he asked again in wonder, lifting a finger to point to the heap of branches, woody vines, and lianas in the corner of the garage, all curled around one another, shaped into what resembled a bowl. A big, massive, beautiful bowl. It took his breath away. The hollowness in the middle of the aerie was filled with deep red cushions and blankets. They were collecting dust.

“Oh,” his mother said, glancing to the aerie. “It’s a nest, Sehun. My nest.”

He gaped at her with wide, curious eyes. A _nest_. Her _nest_. He ran across the garage then, as fast as his little legs could carry him. He wanted a closer look at the _nest_. Up close, the nest was bigger. He would probably get lost in it if he climbed into it. His eyes were full of stars. His cheeks were warm. He brought a small hand to a woody vine and touched it. A giggle broke from his throat.

“Will I have one like this, Mommy?” he asked, spinning around to look at his mother, who was busy rummaging through the drawers in the garage, searching for something called a crowbar.

She straightened up and turned to him, a faint frown drawing her eyebrows low. “A nest?”

He nodded his head eagerly. “Gosh, Mommy,” he let out, touching the nest again. “It’s so pretty.”

“Well,” his mother began as she walked over to him. She then lifted him into her arms. “Of course, Sehun. All Omegas have their own nests. It’s for them to share with their Soulbinders.”

He understood nothing. But he knew he would soon. His parents did that a lot. They’d spring something strange and foreign on him before they’d explain it to him. Then he’d understand. This was no different.

“When will I get one, Mommy?” It was all that he wanted to know. He wanted a _nest_ of his own. One that was as beautiful as this one.

“You will not get it, Sehun.”

That broke his heart.

“You must build one yourself,” she then added. He breathed again.

“Oh. How?”

“You’ll know how, my darling.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek.

And she was right.

As soon as they were back inside, Sehun got right down to it. He first asked his mother to wash his binky clean. Once that was done and the binky was back in his mouth, he was ready. Ready!

He grabbed hold of Mr. Giraffe and stuck the stuffed animal under his arm before he gathered his baby blanket. He had a lot of blankets. And booties and mittens.

He ran to his room then. He had a lot of toys, too. Collecting as many as he could in his small arms, he paused in the middle of his room to scout the perfect location to start building his nest.

The corner near his crib looked spacious. “Yes!” he panted with exhilaration and skipped over to the corner. He laid his blanket down first. Then Mr. Giraffe. Then his booties. Then his mittens. And finally, the rest of his toys. For the next hour, he made sure they were all in their designated place.

His nest was nowhere near as beautiful as his mother’s. But it smelled like him. And he was sure his Soulbinder—whatever that was—would like how he smelled, thus it would like the nest.

Sehun was not sure he wanted to let anyone into his nest, though. It was a messy little thing right now. But as he took his seat in his nest on the floor, which really only seemed like a pile of booties and toys, he felt a sort of satisfaction and happiness he never had before.

“Sehun, the TV is running, and you’re gone,” said his mother as she peered into the nursery. She blinked when she spotted her son kneeling amidst the clutter of toys. Sehun grinned at her, panting and gasping hard. The excitement was uncontainable. He wanted to scream. He had built his nest!

“My nest, Mommy! I build my nest!”

His mother chuckled softly. She had the best laughter in the world. “I can see that, sweetie. You wasted absolutely no time, did you?”

There was just one last thing left for Sehun to complete his nest. He placed his binky carefully between Mr. Giraffe and a pair of blue baby booties. _Perfect._

* * *

He started building his nest when he was only three. When he was six, he moved his nest from the corner of his room to under his bed. At seven years old, his mother told him, quietly and while sobbing, that he was ‘different’. She wouldn’t tell him what sort of ‘different’ he was, but he assumed it couldnʼt be a good ‘different’ if it made his mother cry. When he was eight, he traded the baby items in for a cushion, a pillow, a duvet, and a lamp. As he turned nine, he learned what a Soulbinder was. That was when he realized that he needed a bigger nest.

Soon after that, he was told that male Omegas and female Betas were uncommon. He did not understand why he was told that. He did not even know what an Omega or a Beta was. But what he _did_ understand was that the Alphas were the most powerful and they only came from the Regnandi echelon—the highest and the strongest echelon to ever exist. The middle echelon—the Aequus—consisted of the non-shifters. They could be either Omegas or Betas or both in a pack. But never Alphas. The lowest echelon was the Rexits. The ones without a pack. They were mostly hostile Betas, who were never in a pack to start with, or got exiled.

It was all very confusing. His mother sounded sad as she tried to explain. In the end, she told him that he should never go near the Regnandis or the Rexits. He belonged with the Aequus, the middle echelon.

A few weeks after he turned eleven, a family of seven moved into the house by the forest at the end of the street. He stood by the fence of his own house and watched the moving truck drive away, revealing a tall, burly, bearded man. At his side was a woman, who was smiling at her rowdy children that were running around like wild animals. Two girls, three boys. They were all dark-haired, tan-skinned. They were clearly not from around Oakenbury. They were too loud, too lively for that.

They made Sehun grimace with contempt. Pretentious. Rich. Aggressive. Arrogant. The house by the forest was huge and had been deserted for as long as he could remember. Nobody had lived there since its previous owners were mauled by feral forest animals.

Two girls. Three boys. One of the boys particularly stood out. Like a sore thumb. He was ugly. Sehun already hated him. He was tall and lanky, but he did not look any older than Sehun was. A scrawny kid. Ugly. He had a wild grin about him, a mussed shock of dark hair, and was dressed like a rich kid. He grabbed and arrested his brother in a headlock. His mother broke the pathetic brawl up and ushered her children into the house. Sehun scoffed and walked back into the house.

 _“Wolves. Shifters. Regnandis. Assholes. They all are,”_ he had heard his father say to his mother once when he had come home drunk.


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

OAKENBURY. A small town, mired in humidity, cold, dampness, rain all year long, save the few weeks of warm summer in the middle of the year when the tree thrived, and the forest breathed. The forest that skirted the town, home to wild beasts and harmless branches alike.

The rain fell pitter-patter on the grey pavements. Raindrops trickled down the glass windows. They reminded him of the way a blob of drool. His mother did not like it very much when he drooled. The grey overcasts threw a wet, gloomy blanket over the town. He loved watching the neighbourhood in the evening. The neighbour’s cat often roamed around the street. Sehun wished that one day he could chase it. He wanted to chase it so bad. He did not particularly hate the cat, but he wanted to chase it.

With Mr. Giraffe in one hand, he lifted the other to the window from where he sat on the windowsill and splayed his small, stubby fingers on it. The glass was cold under his touch. He smiled with the binky in his mouth. His hands were always warm. _He_ was always warm. His mommy was always warm and so was his daddy. But Patty from next door was not always warm. Her skin was less warm than Sehun’s and his parents’.

He loved the smell of the rain. He loved the smell of damp dirt. He liked it so much when his hair smelled of shampoo and his skin smelled of baby powder. But more than anything, he loved the smell of his father.

He had a small family. Himself, his mommy, daddy, and Mr. Giraffe. Most people in Oakenbury had small families.

That evening, he was allowed to sit in a chair of his own at the dining table. He was given his own plate, even his own cup of water. There was a small slab of roasted chicken meat, a few chunks of boiled carrots and broccoli, some peas and potatoes on the plate. The splash of bright, vivid colours had him jumping in his chair. His mother chided him with a hiss and reproached him to behave. He could not. All the colours on his plate made him dance.

Green, yellow, orange, brown glared at him against the brilliant red plate. He saw so many colours. He jumped in his seat again and again, arms held halfway up, sucking hard and violently on his binky.

“Sehun, sit still and eat your dinner,” said his father as the towering big man sank in a chair across him. His father always looked tired. He owned and wore a lot of flannel shirts, and always smelled like the forest and timber. Sehun loved the man so much because he smelled so good. He chopped down trees for a living and worked at _François’ Lumber Co._ He did not seem very happy with his work because he always came home with a sullen lour and a disgruntled frown. He huffed and grunted a lot. He told Sehun to put away his toys a lot.

“Eat up, darling,” said his mother kindly, pulling the binky out of his mouth. “You finish all your veggies, I’ll give this back to you.” She took his binky away.

She took his binky away!

He hated her so much when she did that.

Glancing at his plate again, he eyed the chicken salaciously. The meat always enticed him more than anything else. It was not as good as milk, but meat was better than vegetables. But vegetables looked nicer. Colourful. He felt conflicted about food. Milk was never so complicated. It was bright, and it tasted so good.

His father and mother were already digging in. They were talking about the day they had had, something that never interested Sehun because he did not understand any of it.

He glared at the binky resting on the countertop he would not be able to reach. At least his mother was not feeding him tonight. He looked at his parents. They were using forks and knives. Sehun was given none. So, he assumed he would have to use his hands.

Bringing a hand to the plate, he poked around the vegetables. He went in for the chicken first. It was tender with a hint of chariness. The butter melted in his mouth. He made sure to chew carefully because his mother told him many times that he should not swallow before chewing thoroughly. He put all of his teeth into work, just to be sure. Then he swallowed. It tasted great!

“Sehun,” his mother called. “The greens, too.”

He hesitantly picked up a hunk of broccoli. It looked pretty, like a tree. But he had eaten enough broccolis to know that it tasted bad.

“The Rexits are everywhere,” he heard his father say with a sigh.

“Well, we have nothing to worry about. We’re not a threat to them. We don’t shift,” replied his mother.

“We’re still who we are,” his father said. “And we’re not part of _them_. Anyone who’s not one of them is a threat to them. We ought to be careful.”

“Do you think they’d attack Oakenbury? We live peacefully here. There are no Regnandis to threaten them. There isn’t an Alpha in this town.”

“All the more reason for them to take advantage of the lack of control in this town.” The man rubbed the worried creases on his forehead. He then looked at Sehun. “Eat up, son.”

Sehun quickly tossed the broccoli into his mouth. His face twisted with disgust as he tried to munch, glancing over to Mr. Giraffe, whom he had seated on the chair next to him.

“Maybe it’s a reason for us to get out of this rathole,” said his mother.

“We’re not going anywhere. I built this house. We can’t leave it. We’ll just be extra careful.”

His parents were done with their meals long before Sehun was. He could not finish it. He felt disappointed and upset, but he could not eat all the vegetables. They tasted horrible. But the chicken was all gone.

“Sehun, I’m not giving you your binky until you finish it all,” warned his mother.

Sehun could not do it anymore. He could feel the hot tears well up in his eyes. His lower lip jutted out. His hands gripped the edge of the table. He looked up at his mother and broke into a cry.

“He’s eaten enough,” his father said. “Let’s get him to bed.”

His mother did not seem very happy with that, but she gave him his binky back. He was then lifted into his father’s arms. Sehun buried his nose in his father’s neck and sniffed him.

_So good. Smells so good._

“Don’t worry about eating all the greens. You have beautiful hair. You’ll survive out in the world,” his father said with a coarse chuckle. Sehun hugged the man’s bullneck with one arm, sucking on the pacifier, while the other held onto Mr. Giraffe.

* * *

The next day, he saw his mommy kiss his daddy. On the mouth. He gave Mr. Giraffe a kiss on the mouth, too and then grinned happily before hugging Mr. Giraffe tightly.

* * *

Patty visited on Sunday after church. She brought Sehun jelly cups because he liked them. She was an old, big woman and she smelled different. It was not very pleasant. But it smelled like nothing. Like water. She smelled like most people. And most people didn’t smell good like himself, his mommy and daddy.

“He’s growing up fast,” Patty told his mother.

“That he is,” his mother said. Sehun sat on her lap, too shy to lift his head and look at Patty. He was usually shy around everyone but his parents and Mr. Giraffe. Especially the ones that did not smell like him.

After she left, he hurried to his room. He made sure his nest is still there. He checked up on it every evening and before going to sleep. He had not had the chance to show his father the nest.

Some nights, he slept in his messy nest that was nowhere near as beautiful as his mother’s. When he woke up the next morning, he would be happy because with every day that passed, his nest smelled more and more like him.

* * *

He grew a little older, a little taller, and a little wiser the next year. He stopped drinking milk out of a feeding bottle. He ate his vegetables now, even though the meat was always more appealing. He stopped using his binky, but he kept it, safely tucked away in his nest that now looked like a mini tepee. His mother had helped him build it with the sticks they had found together in the backyard.

As he got bigger, so did his nest. And his father grew more tired. He still came home smelling of timber and loam.

* * *

Patty passed away the following year. Everyone in the neighbourhood went to her funeral. It was Sehun’s first funeral. He did not like it. It was sad, black, and depressing. He liked colours, vividness, and things that made him dance.

But he cried for Patty that day. Because his mother cried. Because he knew he’d miss Patty’s jelly cups.

* * *

“How did you and Daddy meet, Mommy?” he asked his mother one day while his mother was gardening. He sat on a tree stump in the backyard and watched her shovel the dirt.

She straightened up with a smile. “We met at the diner.”

“ _Carlos’ Diner?_ ” he inquired. He loved the diner. Carlos served the best waffles, burgers, fries, and milkshakes.

“Yes,” she snickered. “It was love at first sight.”

That intrigued Sehun. His heart was fluttering with excitement and curiosity. “Love at first sight, Mommy?”

She nodded her head and sighed. “With us, it’s always love at first sight.”

“With us? Even me?”

“Even you.”

 _Why? What’s with us,_ he wanted to ask. But he was distracted by what his mother just said. “Love at first sight,” he echoed in a whisper.

He’d wait for that _love at first sight_ for the next few years.

* * *

When he first joined school, he was excited to make friends. He did not have any friends. His parents were certain that he’d make so many friends at the school.

He made two on the first day. One was called Taeyong. The other was Sara. Siblings. They did not look like they were related. At all.

During lunchbreak, Sara offered Sehun a bite from her sandwich. Sehun was happy to get one. It was peanut butter and blueberry jam. Taeyong was having the same.

“Here,” he excitedly held one of his tiny sandwiches out to Sara. “It’s ham.” He was not a fan of sweets. He liked meat. So, his mother made him meaty sandwiches and had cut them into bite sizes.

“Thank you, Sehun,” said Sara. Sehun was so happy when she saw her smile as she ate his sandwich. Taeyong was not particularly chatty. But Sara was. “We are not actually related by blood. I was adopted from Nepal.”

Sehun wondered where that was. He did not know. But that explained a lot.

“I am actually older than she is,” Taeyong said.

“No, you aren’t,” Sara argued.

“Well, I’m taller than you.”

“That does not mean you’re older, you idiot.”

Sehun gasped. “You should not say that word,” he told Sara. She blinked at him.

“What word? Idiot?”

He gasped once more. “Yes. My mother told me to never use… bad words.”

Sara giggled. “Well, your mother isn’t here, is she?”

She had a good point.

“Our mother doesn’t really care about these things,” she said. “She’s a lawyer. She’s always busy.”

“A lawyer in Oakenbury?” Sehun asked.

“One of the very few,” she said. “Our father is an accountant. He is also very busy.”

“What do your parents do, Sehun?” Taeyong said, taking a bite of his apple.

“My dad is a lumberjack. My mom is a grocery shopper,” Sehun said proudly.

The siblings laughed. “A grocery shopper?” Sara snorted. “That’s not a real job.”

Sehun scowled. “Yes, it is. She grocery shops all the time.”

“Does she get paid for it?” Taeyong asked, as though he were trying to make a point.

Sehun was annoyed by it. “I don’t know. But she brings home food. Your parents get paid to buy food, anyway.”

Both Sara and Taeyong seemed stumped for a moment. Then Sara grinned. “You’re a smart one, aren’t you,” she said. “Would you like to come by our house after school?”

Sehun almost keeled over. It was the first ever invitation he had gotten from his first ever friends. He wanted to go, but then he recalled his mother telling him that she would pick him up outside the school after the last bell rang and that he should not leave the school to go anywhere.

“I want to,” he said with a sad frown. “But I can’t.”

Sara shrugged. “Suit yourself.”

* * *

Sara and Taeyong agreed to come over to his house the next year. Sehun’s parents finally agreed to let him invite them over. He spent all day cleaning his room.

Then there was the nest. Mr. Giraffe stared at him from where he was in the nest. Sehun had to move it. He could not let Sara and Taeyong see it. He had asked them once if they had their own nests, and they had pinned him with such a strange look that almost made Sehun cry.

A tinge of sadness spread through his chest as he crouched before his empty nest. Nobody lay in it besides him. And even though he would not let anyone in his nest, he still wanted _someone_ to see it, to cherish it, to appreciate it.

He collected the baby blanket that made the tent of tepee and everything it held inside. He moved the nest to under his bed, where he could still fit.

“What are you doing?” his mother inquired when she caught him miserably shifting his nest.

He stood up and frowned at her. “I’m moving my empty nest. My friends don’t have nests. I don’t want them to see it.”

“Ah.” His mother entered the room, crossing her arms over her chest. “You shouldn’t show your nest to anyone, anyway. Except to just… those who… matter.”

Sehun cocked his head. “Like who? Who can see _your_ nest, Mommy?”

“Well, like you, for instance. You’re my son. I spent the first two weeks after you were born in that nest.” She smiled as though she were smiling at a fond memory. “Before that, only your father was allowed to get into the nest.”

“What?” Sehun rasped. “Daddy was allowed?”

“Yes. Because I love him and he’s my Soulbinder.”

The doorbell rang.

For the first time since Patty died, the house smelled of water and not just loam and timber, forest and fur.

* * *

Life was great. As great as it could get for a seven-year-old in a dismal, quiet town like Oakenbury. Sehun had two great friends. He had loving parents. A caring mother. A hardworking father. He still had his Mr. Giraffe tucked away under the bed.

Sara gave him a lecture on human anatomy one evening. It horrified Sehun to the extent that he wanted to plunge his face in cold water. Taeyong had his hands clasped over his ears.

“Boys have little winkles,” Sara enlightened Sehun.

“I know they do!” Sehun yipped. “I’m a boy!”

“They’re called penises,” Sara said. “Did you know that, too?”

Sehun squealed and whined like a pup and shot up from Sara’s bed. He leaped over to the side of the room where Taeyong stood, covering his ears.

When he came home, he curiously examined his little winkle in front of the mirror in the bathroom.

“ _Penises_ ,” he whispered quietly. Or _kukubird_ like his mother called it. _Kukubird_ sounded better than _penises_.

A week after that, he found his mother at the kitchen counter, nursing a glass of a brown liquid in her hand. The stench stung Sehun’s nose. He hated it.

“Mommy?” he called, walking over to her. She did not respond at first as she continued to stare into the glass. “Mommy?”

She finally turned around and frowned sadly at him. “Yes, Sehun?” she drawled drowsily.

“It’s bedtime,” Sehun said.

His mother was silent again. Her eyes slowly reddened before the tears began to streak her cheeks. Then she was sobbing. Sehun was unsure of what to do. He had only seen his mother cry twice. At Patty’s funeral and when Daddy came home drunk, slurring and cussing.

“I’m so sorry,” his mother whimpered as she collected him in her arms to hug him. “I’m sorry I gave birth to you like this. I’m sorry I made you different.”

Sehun cried, too. Because his mother was crying.

* * *

After that, Sehun began to realize more and more that he _was_ different. What he smelled and sensed, his friends couldn’t. They could not distinguish each and every person based on their own scent like he could.

During a full moon, they did not have cravings to go out into the night and run to exhaustion in the forest like he did.

They did not understand emotions and colours like he did.

They did not have their own nests built like he did.

He _was_ different.

* * *

Sara told him about the ‘big talk’ her parents gave her and her brother. She wouldn’t tell him what the ‘big talk’ was about. She just told him to be patient and wait until his parents were ready to give him the ‘big talk’. Every time she talked about the ‘big talk’, Taeyong would blush feverishly.

Sara also told them that she had a crush on Tom. Sehun learned what a crush was, then. It was when you liked someone so much they made you nervous and happy at the same time.

“You’d want to kiss them,” Sara said. “You’d want to marry them. You’d want them to be your boyfriend.” She was all gushy whenever she talked about Tom. “Especially Tom. Anyone would want him to be their boyfriend.”

Tom was a redhead and he had freckles. Sehun could not tell if he were cute because he had never thought of anyone that way.

“I don’t want Tom to be my boyfriend,” Taeyong said, grimacing.

Sehun blinked. “You can’t have a boyfriend. You’re a boy. You must have a girlfriend.” He was so happy to be able to educate Taeyong.

“No, that’s not true,” Sara said. “Boys can have boyfriends, too. And girls can have girlfriends.”

It was the biggest shock of Sehun’s life at that time.

* * *

The ‘big talk’ took its own sweet time, but it came eventually.

“Sehun, sit down,” his father said sternly. He looked too tired to be having this conversation. Sehun took his seat on the couch, anyway.

His mother wore a worried look on her face. “Sehun, we have talk to you about something,” she said. “I noticed that you’ve been asking a lot about your nest and… Soulbinders. We think you’re ready to know.”

Sehun could only sit still and quiet. This could not be the ‘big talk’ Sara and Taeyong must have had since they did not have a nest and they had never even heard anything about Soulbinders. And Sara practically knew _everything_.

“Your mother tells me that you often tell her that you want someone in your nest, but at the same time, you don’t,” his father said. “That longing feeling… for someone is… It will not be fulfilled until you find your Soulbinder.”

They waited a spell for Sehun’s reaction. He gave none.

His mother sighed. “Sehun, we’re not like everyone else. We’re different. _You’re_ different. You mustn’t talk to anyone about what we’re going to tell you. Do you understand?”

He was an obedient child. He understood, of course.

“Now, listen carefully. Soulbinders are those who bind their soul to yours,” his father said. “You will understand this as you grow up. For now, think of it as love. One love. And it never dies. You must wait for that kind of love.”

They told him a few more things about Soulbinders. But all that was running in Sehun’s head was that he needed a bigger nest. A much, much bigger nest if he were going to fit two people in it.

* * *

Wolves.

That was what he and his family had descended from. When Sehun learned that fact, he was only ten. His mother told him a great deal that night.

Before she took him to the forest in the dead of the night. Sehun smelled it all. The wolves, the loam, the trees, the rain.

It was all very overwhelming that he had broken into sobs on the wet floor of the forest.

Male Omegas were rare. Even in the Aequus echelon. Male Omegas were looked down upon. They were useless to a wolf pack, as they could not bear an offspring. Especially a non-shifting Omega. Sehun learned from his mother that night that she was an Omega. But his father was a Beta and they were both Aequuses, which meant they only inherited some of their ancestral wolfish traits. They were inherently unable to shapeshift.

Sehun had a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that there even existed shapeshifters. Humans who transformed into wolves. A part of him refused to believe it, but why would his mother spin up such a story?

He tried to soak up as much information as he could because his mother seemed upset and he did not want to put her through anything like that again.

* * *

“A pack of Regnandi,” said his father, pacing the living room restlessly. “moved in so close to us!”

“Relax,” his wife told him. “They’re not Rexits. If anything, they’d be able to protect us from Rexits.”

Sehun’s father did not seem relieved by that. “You think?! The Rexits will come for them. And when they do, they won’t stop to think before hurting us, too.”

Sehun sat quietly on the windowsill, hugging his knees to his chest. He had seen the family move in this morning. One tall, muscular, bearded man. His pretty wife. Two girls. Three boys. One lanky and ugly.

“Alphas. All of them,” his father added. “Can you believe it? It’s a strong pack. Probably one of the strongest we’ll ever meet in this life.”

“We should go say hi,” suggested his mother.

“They wouldn’t want us Aequuses there. They’re royalty.” His father scoffed and lit a cigarette. It was a habit he had only recently picked up. Sehun hated that he smelled more like cigarette smoke than timber and the forest now.

“Assholes,” he spat.

“Maybe they’re not that bad,” said his mother. “There aren’t a lot of our kind in Oakenbury, honey. We should try to get them on our side.”

“We stay low,” his father ordered. “We will mind our own business like we’ve always had and let those shifters mind theirs.”

Sehun agreed with it. All of this sounded so serious. He wanted no part in it, even though it made him very curious.

* * *

Regnandi, the highest echelon in the wolf pyramid. They were Alphas, Betas and Omegas. And they were all shifters. Which meant they got to run through the forest in packs of wolves.

Aequus, the middle echelon. They were Betas and Omegas. The non-shifters. They remained in their human form, although they possessed a few of the wolf’s traits. They, like all wolves, took only one mate. One Soulbinder. The Omegas built their nests for them and their Soulbinders. But unlike the rare female betas, only Omegas could bind their souls to an Alpha.

Rexits, the outlaws. Most of them remained as wolves and never shifted into their human forms. They were mostly Betas without a pack, without an Alpha. They were the enemy.

* * *

Sehun got his first bike later that week. He could ride to school on his own like Sara and Taeyong now. He was not a good biker yet, but he’d learn, his mother promised him.

Pulling the bike out of the driveway, Sehun was ready to jump on it.

But then he froze when he saw the boy by the house at the end of the street. The tall, lanky, ugly one. Neither of them blinked.

There were colours. Everywhere. Sehun could not quite pick out which colour he saw. But the boy was there. Staring. Gawking stupidly almost.

His nose twitched, as though he were sniffing the air.

That annoyed Sehun. He walked his bike away from the house. He’d ride it as soon as he was out of the boy’s eyeshot. He did not want to make a fool of himself in front of the Alpha Regnandi.

He kept his head low, though, as he passed the big, fancy house that looked like an overblown luxurious cabin.

“You there!”

He stopped, clutching at the handlebar of the bike. He turned to glare at the boy that had cried out. The boy’s eyes were bulging out as he gaped at Sehun, who scowled at him.

“You… smell funny,” the boy said.

Sehun honestly wanted to throw a shoe at the boy’s head. He was so angry that he could not move a muscle for a moment. Blood boiled in his veins. He wanted to _kill_ the boy.

Instead, he croaked out a weak but angry, “What?”

The boy blinked rapidly. “You smell… funny.”

“Kai!” another voice boomed from the house before a boy skipped over to the rude lad. “What are you doing?” The boy was shorter and younger than the lanky one. Must be his younger brother.

“Jaehyun, Jaehyun!” the stupid boy, whose name was apparently Kai, cooed excitedly, pointing his stupid finger at Sehun. “Smell him! He smells funny!”

Jaehyun titled his head up and started sniffing like a dog. He frowned. “I smell nothing,” he said.

“No, it’s him!” Kai yapped. “It’s weird!”

 _Weird?!_ He was not the one barking on the road, accusing someone of smelling _weird_ and _funny_!

Another boy hurried out of the room. He wasn’t as tall as Kai, but he looked older. “What are you doing outside? Mom asked you to come back in—oh.” He stopped himself when he spotted Sehun, who was glowering viciously at them. “Who’s this?”

“I don’t know!” Kai said. He was almost panting. “He smells funny! Smell him, Yixing! Smell him!”

And Yixing sniffed the air, too. “I don’t smell a thing. Just some mashed potatoes.”

Which Sehun had for breakfast.

“He does!” Kai groused now, pathetically and disappointedly. “Can you smell that?”

Sehun yanked a shoe off a foot and hurled it in the boy’s way. It hit his head and the three brothers went completely still and quiet for a moment.

“Stop telling everyone I smell funny, you little weirdo!” Sehun shouted at the boy, who stared at him in horror now. “You’re ugly!” With that, he climbed onto his bike and stormed off with only one shoe on his feet.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do check out this [fanart](https://twitter.com/seraphicsekai/status/1060837993727057920) I made for this fic! :D And follow me for more!

“Where’s your other shoe?” Sara was not the first to notice Sehun’s one shoed foot, but she was the first to ask as Sehun awkwardly limped into the classroom with only a white sock on one foot. The scowl from earlier still hadn’t left his brows.

Taking his seat at his desk between Taeyong and Sara, he pulled his notebook and pencil out of his backpack.

“Sehun?” Sara called.

He looked at her, still glowering. “I don’t have it,” he said.

He did not have a shoe. He had lost a shoe. He could not go home without the shoe. His mother would ask questions. Then she would tell his father. They would ask more questions, and Sehun would have to tell them the truth. The truth about how he had not only talked to the people his parents had strictly forbidden him from talking to but had also flung a shoe at them.

“Yeah, I can see that,” she said. “But where is it?”

Probably lying on the dirt road at the end of the street he lived on. “I threw it at a boy’s head,” he admitted. There was a hint of pride and satisfaction in his voice.

Taeyong gasped at his other side. “Are you joking?”

Sehun shook his head, eyebrows scrunched together. “He was a weird little thing and he annoyed me.”

A corner of Taeyong’s lips turned. “Whoa. Remind me not to get on your bad side.”

“What boy?” Sara demanded with curiosity. “Does he go to our school?”

Sehun actually had no idea. Did the Regnandis, especially the rude one, go to his school? He shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s a neighbour.”

“What did he do?”

“I told you. He annoyed me.” _And said I smelled weird and funny._ Which was atrocious because Sehun bathed every day with soap and shampoo that smelled like strawberries.

“You’ve never told us anything about an annoying neighbour,” Sara said, being the smarty-pants she always was.

“They just moved to Oakenbury,” Sehun muttered as Mrs. Hampton sauntered into the classroom, heading toward the teacher’s desk. “They seem rich.”

“Wow, really? I’d like to see who they are.”

“No, you don’t,” Sehun growled lowly. His friends were his. The Regnandis could not have them. He would not allow either Sara or Taeyong to go anywhere near those royal Alphas.

“Why would anyone rich move into this lame town?” Taeyong scoffed. Sehun did not think Oakenbury was a ‘lame’ town. He loved the town, even though everyone he knew who lived here hated it. Even his parents, especially his mother, who suggested that they should move away every chance she got.

After school that day, after Sehun had showed his new bike to his two best friends, he rode back home. Still with only one shoe.

It bothered him. He should have thrown his shoe at the boy. The shoes were given to him by his father. They were quite worn, but they were still good to wear. He knew his father had worked hard to buy him those shoes. Losing one of them on purpose made him feel bad and sad.

When he reached the neighbourhood he lived in, he dismounted his bike and gazed ahead at the big house on the end of the street. He swallowed. Maybe his shoe was still there.

He could not go home with only one shoe. He did not want to disappoint his father. He did not want the man to know that he had interacted with the Regnandis, in spite of his warnings to not to do so.

And _that_ made him feel bad and sad, too. He did not like keeping things from his parents. Now, feeling _very_ bad and sad, he stood on the road, hands on the handlebar of the bike, and stared aimlessly at the dirt road that led up to the house by the forest.

He smelled it, then. It was _everywhere_. At first, he thought he had caught a whiff of wet dogs. But he had smelled dogs before, and though they smelled horrible, he had been fine with it. However, this smell was foreign. Also, fine. But strange. He thought had smelled something like it before. But not like this.

Fur. Wood. Dirt. Fur.

It made his heart go fast and his nose twitch. He _loved_ the scent. It was quite similar to the smell of dogs and the hints of wolf scent he had picked up on the last time he was in the woods, but this was… something else. The colours oozing out of the forest from the back of the house quickened Sehun’s breathing. It was all very bright and lucid. _Beautiful_. Like a plate full of colourful vegetables that tasted like meat.

Wolves. Pack. Alphas.

He walked his bike toward the big, cabin-like house.

Stopping in the dirt driveway, he took three deep breaths. Always three. His mother had told him that three breaths would always calm him down.

Three breaths saved him from the nightmares. Three breaths saved him from cold baths. Three breaths saved him from reading out loud in class for Mrs. Hampton.

When he was tired of waiting for his _love at first sight_ , three breaths ensured him that he would find one eventually.

Sucking in those three breaths, he locked up his bike and left it on the roadside before marching up the hill of a driveway. The house had a garage out at the front, and the open shutter bared two cars. They looked like rich-people cars.

Sehun wondered if they were so rich, why move into a ‘lame town’ like Oakenbury? They could live in the city. If he were rich enough to afford two fancy cars like those, he’d probably live in the city, too. He’d never been to the city, though. But he imagined it would be mighty cool.

He stopped in the middle of the driveway and stared out into the forest behind the house. He could hear the birds’ chirps and the crickets. He’d lived here all his life but had never been in the forest apart from that time his mother brought him there after divulging secrets that should be more secret.

A part of him wanted to wander a little further and explore the woods. Douse himself in the scent of timber, loam, and wolves.

His parents would be furious if he did that. He did not want to see his mother cry or his father disappointed.

Averting his gaze from the trees, he scanned the narrow driveway in search for his shoe. This was the spot the Regnandi boys had been standing in. Kai, Jaehyun, and Yixing.

The washout after not being able to locate his shoe left a heaviness in his chest. Where could it have gone? They couldn’t have possibly picked it up or thrown it away again, could they?

Only one way to find out.

He glanced at the house and the porch and then the front door. His eyebrows furrowed worriedly. He looked down his dirty sock and the one shoe. He could not go home with only one shoe.

For a boy his age, Sehun was brave. He never sought fights, but they were brought to him, he had never backed away. Two years ago, he had sat on a boy’s chest and bitten his ear. Because the boy had pulled his hair. Earlier this year, he had snapped another boy’s pencil in half after the rascal had messed with Sara’s notebook.

He was Sehun. He was building a small nest in his room, and he would protect it with his life while he waited for his _love at first sight_ , his Soulbinder, his mate. He loved his parents. He would die for Mr. Giraffe. He loved his two friends. He did all of his homework, even if he weren’t the brightest student. But he had two sides. First, one that would do anything to please the ones he loved and loved him. Second, one that’d bite anyone that tried to hurt him or the ones he loved.

Failing to find his shoe, he decided that he would have to just man up and ask the person he had thrown it at.

So, he marched over to the porch and stood before the door. The doorbell was too high up for him to reach, even on his tippy toes.

Winding a tight fist, he knocked on the door. Twice. Waited. Knocked again when there was no answer.

On the third knock, the door opened. It made a small creaky noise.

A big man appeared. His beard covered most of his jaw. His was all muscles and hairs. His tan skin made him seem like he had toiled under the sun all his life, unlike the people of Oakenbury, who barely saw any sun at all. His dark, brown eyes narrowed as they slowly lowered to look at the intruder that had knocked on the door. A dark brow then rose in wonder and puzzlement.

He _terrified_ Sehun. The man was _big_. So much big up close. And that scent… He smelled like Sehun’s father. But… much stronger. Much, much stronger. Timber, mountains, rivers, ground, earth!

_Alpha…_

Sehun almost turned around and ran for his life.

But he didn’t. He stood still, though with a slight tremor in his shoulders.

Then a smile curled against the man’s lips. “Well, what have we got here…” he said in a friendly tone. He lowered to a crouch to meet Sehun’s eye at a same level and smiled wider. “Hello there.”

Sehun’s heart swelled at that. Such a big, big man. _Alpha._

He cleared his throat before speaking. Even then, his voice sounded like a mouse’s squeak compared to the man’s loud, deep voice.

“H-Hello,” he managed to stutter out. “I-I’m… Sehun.”

The man grinned. “Hi, Sehun. I’m Geun. Nice to meet you.” He held a large hand out.

Sehun did not know what he should do. Well, he did. He had to shake the man’s hand. But he could not. He was too dumbstruck for that.

The man only smiled. “Aren’t you going to shake my hand?” he asked, briefly frowning sadly.

“My shoe!” Sehun blurted out, panting breathlessly.

Geun blinked. “I beg your pardon?”

Sehun wanted to cry. He did not know why. But another part of him wanted to bury his face in the big man’s beard and sniff him and scream, _alpha!alpha!alpha!_

“Your son took my shoe!” he shouted, eyes already watering.

“Oh,” the man let out, sounding genuinely taken aback as he rose back to his full, tall height. “My son… took your… shoe?”

Sehun took more than three breaths since just three breaths did not help him calm down. “Yes!”

“Do you know which one of my sons did that?”

Sehun did. “The ugly one.”

Geun looked petrified then. “The… _ugly_ one?”

“Honey, who’s at the door?” came a female voice from inside.

 _Oh, no_ …

When she came into view, Sehun wanted to do nothing but pounce on her and sniff her and hug her and scream into her neck, _alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Then she smiled down at him so beautifully that Sehun was so sure it had to be _love at first sight_.

“This is Sehun, Hana,” said Geun, curling an arm around his wife’s waist. “He says… our _ugly_ son has taken his shoe.”

Hana’s eyes widen. “What?”

“Mommy?” a girl joined them. She was tiny. The tiniest of them all. Suddenly, Sehun did not feel so vulnerable. And she was an ugly little thing, too. He hated her. But she was not as ugly as her brother.

Hana lifted the girl into her arms. The girl glared down at Sehun. Sehun glared back.

“Yixing, Jaehyun, Kai!” Geun roared, startling Sehun out of nowhere. He thought he would have peed his pants if his bladder had been full. “Get down here right this instant!”

“Do you… want to come in?” Hana offered Sehun. He loved her for that, too.

Everything was so overwhelming, he might pass out.

He shook his head immediately. “I just want my shoe!” The tears in his eyes were close to falling.

He heard heavy footfalls descending the stairs from inside before the three boys made an appearance. As soon as his eyes fell on Kai, sheer rage shot through his body. Kai did not seem surprised to see him as he carefully looked away, biting his lip. Had he already _smelled_ Sehun’s presence? Like he did this morning?

“Now, which one of you is the ugly one?” Geun asked, turning to his sons.

All three of them grimace up at their father.

“I bet it's you,” Geun said, pointing to Jaehyun. “I told you that haircut will be your downfall.”

“Dad!” Jaehyun groaned.

“Sehun here tells me that I have one ugly son, who’s also apparently a shoe thief.”

Hana was smiling as though she were stifling a laughter. Sehun did not understand what could possibly be funny about this situation.

Both Yixing and Jaehyun turn to Kai. “He hit Kai with a shoe this morning,” said Yixing.

Geun’s jaw fell slack. “He did that?”

Sehun was sure in a few moments, he would be a dead meat in the man’s big hands. What was he thinking?! Coming here without a second thought! He just had not imagined they would be so large and scary up close. Not to mention the scent…

“Did you?” Geun asked, turning to Sehun. He did not look mad, at least.

Sehun braved himself once more and nodded his head. “He said I smelled bad.”

Geun turned to his son. “Kai, why would you do that?”

Kai kept mum, head hung.

“Apologize to Sehun for saying that,” Hana then said. “You’re neighbours. You should be nice to each other.”

How did she know Sehun was a neighbour? Well, she was a wolf. She could probably sniff up an Aequus from miles away.

When Kai did not say anything, Geun raised a hand to his shoulder. “Kai, apologize.”

Kai brought his head up then and met Sehun’s angry gaze. His lips quivered as he parted them to say, “I’m sorry.”

Sehun did not want his ‘sorry’. He wanted his shoe.

“My shoe,” he demanded angrily.

Geun looked at his son again.

“I don’t have it!” Kai yelped. “I swear!”

Sehun felt devastated then. He could not go home without the shoe! “You’re lying!” he spat.

“I’m not!” Kai argued.

“Okay, okay. Break it up, you two,” Geun said, holding his son back. “Sehun, if we find your shoe somewhere, we’ll bring it over. We promise. For now, I think you should go home.”

Sehun scowled at Kai, who only stared at him like he was suffocating.

“Come on,” Geun said, ushering his other two boys inside.

Meanwhile, Sehun and Kai did not look away from each other. Kai then said, in a very low voice, “I’m not… ugly.”

Sehun’s mouth turned sourly. He pointed a forefinger at Kai’s face and said, “Yes, you are, ugly.” He stuck his tongue out, stills glaring at the boy like he wanted to burn Kai’s soul with just his stare. “Ugly. Ugliest wolf in this world.” Having said that, he spun on his heel and stomped away.


	4. Chapter 4

It was a mystery. A mystery Sehun so badly wanted to solve, but at the same time, he did not know where to even start. The mystery was how could two beautiful, wonderful, tall people have such an annoying, ugly child.

“Sehun, eat your vegetables,” said his mother, yanking him back to reality. He had not stop thinking about them. The Alphas. The Regnandis. The biggest man Sehun had ever seen, Geun. The prettiest woman he had ever met, Hana. The naughtiest rascals he had ever had the displeasure of making acquaintances, Jaehyun, Yixing, and of course, Kai. He had not seen much of the other two girls. But he assumed they were just as insufferable as the rest of the litter.

“Maybe they’ll go away again soon,” said his father, his mouth full and eyes angry. “It’s difficult with them around.”

“Well, you’re the one who said we could just _ignore_ them. Their scent is too strong for us ignore,” his mother muttered. “And they’re not even calling to us.”

His father turned angrier. “I know! It’s frustrating. It’s already bad as it is. If they called to us, we’d be clambering up there like a warren of rabbits in heat in no time.”

“Do you think we would be able to just ignore it if they started calling to us?”

Something different from anger flashed in his father’s eyes. It almost seemed like worry. “I don’t think we can,” he let out. “I don’t think… I can. They are… Alphas, after all. Betas and Omegas must bow their heads to the Alphas.”

His mother lowered her head. “I almost went over there today. I couldn’t… stop myself.”

“I know you’d feel like you need to pay your respects to them and stay as close as you can to them, and… I feel the same. But we don’t even know them. They’re not our pack. And we’re _definitely_ not their pack. We’re just meaningless Aequuses to them. We cannot trust them. As soon as we’re on their side, the Rexits that might be coming for them will be coming for us, too.”

Sehun did not understand much of what was going on. But he was glad that his parents had not noticed his missing shoe. It was the first of many secrets he was going to keep from them.

* * *

A week went by, and Sehun had not gone anywhere near the Regnandis’ house again. It was, however, killing him to refrain himself from going there. He’d look at it every day on his way to school, though.

They did not go to his school, as it turned out. His father said one evening during dinner that the parents, Geun and Hana—Sehun knew their names and his parents didn’t, and it made him excited—would probably keep the pups close to them so that they could keep an eye on them for now. Especially since the smallest one was around the shifting age. Sehun did not ask what that was, as much as he wanted to know everything about the Regnandis.

Anyway, they were being home-schooled. Sehun asked his mother that night why he wasn’t home-schooled, and she told him that neither she nor Daddy was smart enough for that. And that only meant one thing. Geun and Hana were _smart_ , too.

So, how did they beget such a stupid son, who went around sniffing strangers?

A mystery.

Sehun shared this mystery with his friends one Wednesday evening at the diner.

Mexican music played blared from the old jukebox. Carlos was yelling at his waiters in Spanish. The diner always smelled of wondrous things. It was the only place Sehun was allowed to bike to on his own apart from the school, under the one condition that an adult was present to chaperone him. And it was Sara and Taeyong’s mother, who had driven them there.

Settling in their usual booth at the corner of the diner while Sara and Taeyong’s mother found a seat at the barstools near the counter, Sehun started whispering to his friends.

“So, do you remember the rich neighbours I told you about?”

Taeyong nodded. “The one you lobbed a shoe at.”

“Yes. He and his family. I met them. I met them last week. And I talked to them.”

Sara looked intrigued, but Taeyong was already bored. He was waving at Carlos, who waved back and beckoned that he would be attending them soon.

“How are they?” Sara inquired.

“ _Amazing_ ,” Sehun breathed out. “Well, the father and mother are, at least.” There was not a lot that he could tell them. He could not tell them how epic they had smelled. He could not tell them how he had wanted to latch onto them and never let go. Or how he had wanted to cry and scream _alpha!alpha!alpha!_

“Rich people always are amazing.” Sara shrugged. “Tell me more.”

“What can I get you _niños_ tonight?” Carlos asked when he came over to their booth. He was slightly older than Sehun’s father. He was stern to his employees and customers who gave him a hard time sometimes, but he was mostly a great guy. Sehun liked him. He had no bright colours around him and he did not smell extraordinary like Geun and Hana, but he was a nice man. He had a weird son though, who never talked to anyone. And speaking of whom… Sehun glanced around the diner and spotted Sebastián in a booth of his own, nose buried in a book while he waited for his father to be off his work shift. Sehun didn’t think Carlos was ever off his work shift.

He was a year older than Sehun, Sara and Taeyong. But every time Sehun saw the boy in the school’s hallways or cafeteria, Sebastián had been by his lonesome. He was a spectacled olive-skinned boy who fidgeted too much and refused to look at anybody’s eyes. Sehun could never figure him out. And Sebastián was far too boring for Sehun to figure him out, anyway.

He ordered a chocolate milkshake and a cheeseburger. Once Carlos had had their orders, he wandered away after ruffling Taeyong’s head once.

“Where were we?” Sara said. “Oh, yes. Your new neighbours.”

“Yes. They have three sons and two daughters. One of the sons’ existence just angers me so much,” Sehun admitted.

Both Sara and Taeyong looked surprised. “Why?” Taeyong asked. “What did he do to you?”

“Nothing… too bad, I guess,” Sehun said. He had a lot of colours around him. He smelled like dogs but nothing special. He had called Sehun weird and funny, when _he_ was the one weird and funny one. He wasn’t sure his _normal_ friends would understand why these reasons would annoy anyone.

“Then why would you hate him?” Taeyong asked. He sounded like a lawyer sometimes.

Sehun shrugged. “I just feel it.” He pointed to his stomach. “In my belly button. It’s strange. But he is not good news. I know that.”

“Your _belly button_ tells you that,” Taeyong murmured, arching an eyebrow.

“We must meet him!” Sara exclaimed. “And we’ll see for ourselves how bad he is. How old is he?”

“Our age, probably,” mumbled Sehun.

“Oh. Then he must go to our school.”

“He doesn’t,” Sehun said. “I told you the last time that he doesn’t.”

“Oh, right.”

“Oh, my God,” Taeyong gasped all of a sudden. Sehun froze in his seat. “Don’t turn around right away, but the most beautiful girl I’d ever laid my eyes upon just walked into the diner.”

Sehun’s head spun a little. He smelled it. The overwhelming blend of wolf scents. They weren’t strong but there were a lot.

Both Sehun and Sara turned their heads at once. His belly button did the thing again and his heart skipped a beat when he saw the three boys and the ‘beautiful girl’ Taeyong was talking about. She was their sister. And she certainly looked older than both Jaehyun and Kai. And Taeyong was right. Sehun had not noticed the first time he had seen her, but she was beautiful. Like her mother.

The boys remained close to their sister, all wearing a similar predatory expression, as though they were about to pounce on any man who’d even dare to look in their sister’s way.

Behind them strode in Geun and Hana, who was bearing their youngest daughter in her arms.

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Sehun’s breathing quickened and he started panting as he took in the two big Alphas’ scents. Along with theirs, he also smelled another strong, unfamiliar scent. It had to belong to their other daughter.

“Well, isn’t this a dainty little place,” Hana commented, smiling at the diner. In front of her, Kai had his head tilted up and nose scrunched up, eyebrows drawn together in concentration. The jerk was _sniffing_!

“Oh, no,” Sehun gasped and ducked, lowering his head, as though it were going to help one bit.

“What’s wrong? Who are they?” Sara blurted out.

“Yeah. Who is _she_?” Taeyong chimed.

“It’s them, you guys!” Sehun hissed under his breath. “The neighbours I was telling you about!”

“If it isn’t our little Cinderella who lost his shoe,” came the big, gruff voice Sehun had not stop thinking about for the past week from behind him. His head shot up at once and he turned around in his seat to look up at Geun and his big smile. His wife, Hana smiled at his side, too.

“Cinderella?” Sara started laughing.

Sehun’s cheeks warmed and reddened. He glanced to Kai, who was still sniffing, but he was now staring at Sehun.

“It’s nice to see you again, Sehun,” Hana said.

“Ah. So, this is Sehun,” said their eldest daughter. “I’ve heard so much about you.” She stepped forward and leaned her face in so close to Sehun’s. She sniffed him, too. Sehun went completely paralyzed. His little heart was beating so hard that it might jump out of his chest at any moment now.

Then frowning, she pulled away and turned to her brother. “Nope. Sorry, Kai. I don’t smell it either.”

It was Kai’s turn to flush red. He looked away, chewing on his bottom lip.

“Well, we’ll stop pestering you kids,” Geun said and ushered his family away to a booth nearby. Kai was looking at Sehun again.

They could not all fit in one booth, so they took two. Geun, Hana, the little one, and Jaehyun sat in one booth and the rest in another.

“Oh, my goodness. This is _them_?” Sara asked. “They all look like movie stars!”

“Not the ugly one!” Sehun snapped at her angrily.

“Who’s ugly there, Sehun?” Taeyong grumbled. “Good genes must run in that family. They even smell like the most expensive perfumes.”

“No, they don’t,” Sehun growled. “Well… The big ones do but the others… No.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Sara asked, blinking. “You look like you’re about to go into a panic attack.”

Sehun did not know what a panic attack was but it sounded very much like what he was going through right now.

He watched Carlos take their orders. Even Carlos looked stumped to say anything witty to them. He scratched the back of his head as he walked away from the booths with the Regnandis’ orders.

Sehun’s gaze shifted to Kai again. The jerk was still staring. As annoying as it was, Sehun experienced a brief jolt of embarrassment that made him look away from Kai.

His chocolate milkshake and cheeseburger arrived, and he was thankful for the distraction. “You know that boy?” Carlos asked when he handed them their food.

Sehun confusedly looked up at the man. “Who?”

“That one. He insisted that I get him whatever you ordered.”

A few minutes later, another cheeseburger and chocolate milkshake were delivered to Kai.

Sehun’s blood boiled.

But he sat quiet.

He tried to listen to Taeyong and Sara, but they were only talking about the Regnandis. He tried to turn his attention to the milkshake. And every time he took a sip out of the straw, Kai did, too. Every time he took a bite of his cheeseburger, Kai mimicked him.

In the end, Sehun pushed the remaining milkshake and cheeseburger away and crossed his arms over his chest. Kai frowned at him from across the diner.

“Come on,” he heard the elder sister say. “Let’s go say hi.”

“No!” Kai protested quietly.

“It’ll be all right.” She took hold of his wrist and yanked him out of the booth. Yixing and Jaehyun followed.

Sehun was already getting ready to flee.

But he was too late.

“Hi. We haven’t really met,” she said to Taeyong and Sara.

“H-Hi,” Taeyong choked. “My name is… Taeyong. This is my sister Sara and I believe you’ve already met Sehun.”

“Hello, Taeyong.” She shook hands with him. “These are my brothers, Jaehyun, Kai, and Yixing.” Taeyong waved at them. Sara did, too. “And I’m Chanri. My baby sister over there is Jeni.”

Sehun sat still, hands clutched between his legs under the table.

“So, you guys go to Oakenbury Elementary?”

“No,” Sara said now. “We go to Oakenbury Middle School. We’re eleven.”

“Oh, I see. I go to Oakenbury High,” Chanri said. “I just started there yesterday.”

“How old… are you?” Taeyong inquired disappointedly.

“I’m fourteen. Yixing here is fifteen and my brother Kai is actually the same age as you.”

“He doesn’t go to school with us, though,” said Sara.

“Not yet.”

“Oh.”

“So, Sehun,” Chanri cooed, propping her elbows on the table. “My brother tells me that you threw a shoe at his head because he said you smelled funny.”

She was too close. _alpha!alpha!alpha!_ Sehun wanted to hug her.

He clenched his hands tighter.

“He was… rude,” he breathed out shakily.

“Yes, that he was. But do you find anything funny about him?”

“Chanri, please stop,” Kai begged her, tugging at her blouse from behind. “Let’s go back to our table.”

Sehun bit his tongue to keep his mouth shut. When he looked up at Geun and Hana, they were only smiling at each other. It made him wonder if they were each other’s _love at first sight_ and Soulbinders.

“My shoe,” Sehun whispered weakly. “Did you… find it?”

“Not yet, Cinderella,” Jaehyun scoffed. “And when we do, your Prince Charming will bring it to you, don’t worry.”

 _Prince Charming_? And who the hell was _Cinderella_?!

“Jaehyun!” Kai growled, and in that moment, Sehun thought his sight was fooling him for a second as he saw Kai’s dark eyes flash red. It came and went without warning.

“ _What_?” Jaehyun shrugged.

“I’m going to go now,” Sehun said to his friends and left some of the money his mother had given him to pay Carlos for the food before he slinked past the Regnandi kids.

“Nice seeing you, Sehun!” Chanri called out to him, but Sehun could not tell if she meant it. He had to get out of there. He hurried out of the diner and started for his bike.

The evening had not darkened much but it was rapidly getting there. He had promised his mother he’d be home before five.

As he unlocked his bike, a voice jumped him. “Hey.”

He turned around with a fist ready to punch the boy in the face. Kai took a step back, eyes widening.

“Whoa.”

Sehun lowered his fist and scowled. “What do you want?!”

Kai scratched his head, like he was rifling through it for an answer. Then he faced Sehun again, looking more determined than ever.

“I’m going to protect you,” he declared confidently, chest pushed out, chin held high.

Sehun did not move. He stared fixedly at the boy. Did he hear him right? “What… did you… say?”

Kai cleared his throat. “I said I’m going to protect you.”

Sehun blinked. “From… what?”

Kai frowned. “I, um, don’t know. I don’t know yet. But… something. Everything. Yes. I’ll protect you from everything.”

Sehun lost it. He took a step forward and prodded a finger into the boy’s chest. “You have two French green bean arms, two chopstick legs, and three little hairs on your head. How are _you_ going to protect me from anything, you little weirdo?! Stop following me! I don’t need you to protect me!”

“B-But—”

Sehun attacked him then, jumping on the boy. He could no longer take it. He sat on Kai’s chest that evening outside Carlos’ diner and bit his ear. His parents were going to be so mad at him.


	5. Chapter 5

“Bring me the hammer, Sehun,” his father ordered. Summer would soon be upon them. The sun would find Oakenbury again and the backyard would flourish for a while. As the heat returned to the small, cosy town, Sehun’s father decided to take up a project.

It was more to keep him distracted when he was not at work, especially in the weekends. Just like how the gardening kept his mother distracted. She did it more often now. She cooked more and tried new recipes. Not all of them turned out great. She even watched more TV and obsessed over what Sehun should wear every day. And his hygiene. Last night, she had sat him down and cleaned his ears.

All these distractions in order to stay away from the family of Alphas who lived at the end of the street.

But that ship had long sailed for Sehun.

A week had gone by and he still dreaded the sound of the doorbell. Perhaps today would be the day it would ring, and his parents would find two tall, gorgeous Regnandis standing on the doorstep. They would tell Sehun’s parents about the ‘unimaginable’ thing Sehun had done to their son at _Carlos’ Diner_. But when the doorbell did not ring today, Sehun would go on to think that it would happen tomorrow.

He was losing his sleep over it. And the worst part was that his parents knew absolutely nothing about any of it. They did not know about Sehun having already talked to the Regnandis. They didn’t know about the shoe incident. They had no clue of _The Unimaginable_. They hadn’t noticed the missing shoe.

 _The Unimaginable_ kept Sehun up at nights. He must have disappointed Geun and Hana. And Chanri. And he didn’t know why the thought of letting them down made him sad. What was even worse was that he was sure they would be so furious with him for what he had done to Kai.

Kai had yelped and gasped, but he had not screamed for help while Sehun had sat on his chest, grabbed his dainty-looking jumper and sank his teeth into the helix of the poor boy’s ear. He then had scrambled off of Kai, jumped on his bike, and pedalled away as hard as his little feet could.

It was only a matter of time before his parents found out about _The Unimaginable._ Perhaps he should come clean before that. All these secrets were starting to weigh down on him.

“Maybe we should wait until he’s a little older to do this,” said his mother worriedly as Sehun picked up the hammer from the toolbox.

Their backyard was a mess with wooden planks and posts strewn all over it. “He’s the perfect age to build a treehouse with his father,” replied his father.

Sehun was excited about the treehouse. He had always wanted one ever since he had learned what a treehouse was.

“Besides, he needs a shed of his own for his nest,” his father added.

His mother had nothing more to say. They never talked about Sehun’s nest. And when they did, the conversation died sooner than the rays of sunshine that fell on the pavements in Oakenbury.

Sehun began to understand that his parents did not particularly like talking about their son being an Omega with a nest. Well, that was something he could not do anything about. He was born an Omega and the nest was too precious to him for him to get rid of it. Besides, his parents never explicitly said anything against it.

“It’ll be out in the open,” his mother said after a while as she watched her husband lug the planks to the big tree that was full of squirrels on the backyard.

“It’ll be hiding in plain sight,” the man shot back.

Why must they hide? Because Sehun was a male omega? Were his parents embarrassed of him?

Sehun frowned, looking down at the box of nails in his hands. Great. One more mystery for him to fret over.

“Sehun, here. Pick this up with me.” His father beckoned him over. Putting the nails down, Sehun helped his father grab a plank. It was light for his dad, but it was the heaviest thing Sehun had ever lifted.

At the end of the day, the treehouse did not look anything like a treehouse and his father said they’d work it again tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and the day after that. Until it was complete. Then Sehun could start building his nest in there. He promised that they’d go shopping for mattress, curtains, cushions, and whatever Sehun needed.

That night, when Sehun went to bed, he checked on the nest under the bed. It was starting to collect dust. He would sleep in it more often only if it were more comfortable. He retrieved Mr. Giraffe, however. Back in his bed, he stroked Mr. Giraffe’s head while staring at the painted stars on the ceiling of his bedroom.

 _It must have hurt him, right…_ he wondered.

_I had bitten him hard…_

He felt a tightening in his chest. He should not have done _The Unimaginable._ All the boy did was be stupid and annoying and ugly. He did not deserve to have his chest sat on and ear chewed off. Sehun realized that he was in the wrong here. And he would never get to sleep peacefully again until he had received his punishment.

Or forgiveness.

He hugged Mr. Giraffe tightly. He was angry again. He would never say sorry to that jerk!

* * *

Three days later, he was standing on the Regnandis’ porch instead of being on his way to school. He had lied to his mother about a homework he had to complete at school. Another secret, another lie. They were all building to be a mountain.

He could not muster to courage to lift a hand to the door and knock. So, he stood there quietly, taking a lot of _three breaths_.

He saw a _nya_ in a corner of the porch and tried to ignore it. He lifted a fist. Dropped it back to his side. Lifted it again. Couldn’t do it, so he dropped it.

The door creaked open and Sehun almost jumped.

“Were you not going to knock?” Hana asked, her face as pleasant as the last two times Sehun had seen it.

He was bereft of any kind of speech. His eyes popped out and he could only stare up at the beautiful woman who smelled _epic._ It took him all of his energy to not to climb up her leg and tell her that he loved her.

“Is it Sehun?” came another familiar voice from inside before Chanri appeared with a toothy grin. “I thought I smelled the cute little pecan.”

And Sehun wanted to climb up her leg, too.

He gawked at her as she brushed a dark lock of hair out of her face. _Beautiful._

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Did Kai tell them about what happened?

“Are you here for your shoe?” Hana inquired. She did not sound mad. She sounded nice. As usual.

Sehun knew he had to speak now.

“No, I don’t think so,” Chanri said, curling a hand around her mother’s arm. She was almost as tall as Hana. She smirked. “Look.” She pointed at Sehun’s feet. “He has shoes. He must be here for Kai.”

“Well, really? I figured he didn’t like Kai enough to visit him. Especially after he had called him _ugly_ and bitten his ear.”

Sehun wanted the ground to swallow him up whole. He was so close to ears and the _nya_ was also crawling closer to him across the wooden porch. He was going to end up crying at this rate.

And he did not want to humiliate himself in front of two beautiful Alphas.

He told himself that he was a man, like his father, and he was strong. So, he took three breaths and said, “I am here for… him. I… want to apologize.”

Both Hana and Chanri exchanged a glance before they started smiling a strange smile.

“Would you like to come in then, Sehun?” Hana offered. “You can wait inside. Kai is not home at the moment. He is out running with his father and brothers.”

 _Running_? Well, that made sense. It was early in the morning. People often went on runs in the morning.

“I should be… on my way to school,” Sehun murmured, even though he did not really like saying no to them. He wanted to please them. He wanted to show them that he was a good boy. And he was not only a naughty boy who’d bite people’s ears.

“I’m sure you have a little time to spare in your hands,” Hana said. “But you don’t have to come in if you don’t want to.”

Sehun glanced at the _nya_ that was inching closer. He looked up at the Alphas again. He bit his lip. Then in a small voice he said, “Okay.”

They stepped aside and made way for him to enter.

The house smelled like them. Just like how Sehun’s house smelled like him and his parents.

With just his first few steps into the house, his jaw dropped, and his eyes widened. The house looked nothing like Sehun’s own. Both on the outside and the inside.

They had a big TV. Five couches. Furry carpets. Fancy decors. Sehun felt so small and insignificant in a place so lavish.

He held his hands together at his front and made himself look even smaller so that no one would notice the ugly splotch in the midst of an ocean of wonder.

“Have a seat, Sehun,” Hana said, and her hands came up to Sehun’s shoulders.

He almost swooned. Hana must have felt him shudder because she retrieved her hands immediately. When Sehun had found the smallest sofa in the living room, he took a very tiny seat on just the edge. He kept his head low at all times. Everything smelled like Geun and Hana. But mostly Geun. It made Sehun’s throat tighten.

“What can I get you? Cookies and juice?” Hana asked.

“A shoe and an ugly boy is more like it,” Chanri taunted as she plumped unceremoniously on the couch across Sehun. Sehun blushed.

“Chanri, be nice to him.”

“I am nice!” She grinned at her mother, who shook her head and disappeared down the hallway, leaving Sehun alone with her daughter. “So, Sehun. How old are you?”

“Eleven,” Sehun answered obediently.

“Ah, yes. I remember.” She straightened up and smiled wider. “You don’t like my brother?”

Sehun shook his head slowly.

“Wow. I appreciate your candour,” she laughed. “Why don’t you like him?”

“I…” Sehun wanted his voice sound louder than a whisper, but he couldn’t make it happen. “He’s… rude.”

“Why is he rude?”

“He said I smelled funny. We did not even know each other!”

Chanri nodded her head considerately. “Well, funny doesn’t always mean _weird_ or _bad_. It could sometimes mean _different_ or _unique_. Have you never smelled anything that’s different or unique?”

Sehun blinked. Yes, he had. Chanri, Geun, and Hana smelled different and unique.

“Here. Have some cookies,” Hana said as she returned to the living room with a plate of cookies and a cup of what smelled like strawberry juice. Sehun was hesitant to consume them. If his parents found out, they’d be more than just furious.

He picked up a cookie nonetheless because the Alpha said he should have some. Taking a small bite, he rubbernecked at Hana and Chanri. He wondered why they hadn’t made a big fuss about him biting their son’s ear.

“Why didn’t you… tell my parents?” he asked then.

“About?” Hana shot back.

“About…” _The Unimaginable._ “what happened.”

“Oh. Well, Kai told us not to and that it wasn’t a big deal.”

Why would Kai say that?

It _was_ a big deal. Sehun had hurt him. Or did he not find Sehun hurting him threatful enough? It made Sehun both mad and confused.

He heard voices then. Laughter. Foot stomps. Then he saw three little naked boys trailing into the house from the backdoor behind a one big naked man, all smelling like trees, dirt, and leaves.

Sehun dropped the cookie, mouth falling open. His first instinct was to cover his eyes with his hands.

_Penises._

So many _penises_. And one of them looked nowhere near like his own.

“Mom!” Kai yelled. Sehun picked out the distress in his voice amid the laughter. Everyone was laughing. “Why would you not warn us?!”

“We thought it’d be funny,” Chanri said, cackling hard.

Sehun clenched his eyes tightly. But he heard heavy footfalls running up the stairs.

“I hate you all!” he heard Kai’s scream from upstairs.

“Let’s give him a minute,” he heard Geun say. “Hi, Sehun.”

Sehun did not dare pull his hands away from his eyes until he was sure it was only he and Chanri left in the room again.

He was so embarrassed that he thought his face was on fire. Chanri was still laughing.

Yixing was the first to join them again, wearing only a pair of shorts.

“Hey, Sehun!” he greeted enthusiastically. “Came for your shoe?”

“No, he came for the _boo_ ,” Chanri said.

“Oooooh,” Yixing cooed. He dropped to a seat on the armrest of the sofa Sehun was sitting on. “Want to see your boo, eh?”

 _What boo?_ Sehun wanted to ask. But he was still too petrified to say anything.

“Why do you look like that?” Yixing asked. “You’re a very jumpy one, aren’t you? What? You’ve never seen naked boys before?”

As a matter of fact, he hadn’t! And he did not think he ever would! But he had seen four in one day.

Yixing ran a hand through his mussed hair and pulled out a piece of a twig. “Well, you better get used to that if you’re going to hang around here more often.”

He was not going to! Ever! Come here! Again!

It was a lie and he knew it even then.

Geun eventually sauntered into the living room with Hana at his side. “So, Sehun. Hana tells me that you’re here to see Kai,” he said.

Sehun gulped and nodded sternly. “Yes… sir.”

A smile quirked up on a side of Geun’s lips. “I told you he’s a good one,” he muttered to his wife.

“I _know_ that he’s a good one,” Hana argued.

“Just a little quick-tempered. Like any unbound Omega,” Geun said.

He knew? About Sehun being an Omega? Of course, he did. He was an Alpha.

“He’s got nice hair, though,” Yixing commented.

“Right?!” Chanri chimed in, too. “I noticed. If he were wolf, he’d shift into this beautiful red wolf.”

“That’s not how it works, you fool,” Yixing spat.

“I know that, you moron. I was obviously joking.”

“You’re the moron!”

“Says the mor—”

“Take it outside, you two,” Geun chided them. They fell quiet for a moment, but they continued to glare at each other. Then springing up to their feet, Yixing chased Chanri out of the house.

Sehun shuddered. He had always wondered what having a sibling would be like. Now he never wanted one.

“Kai, get down here! You’re making Sehun late for school,” Hana called out.

Sehun clenched his hands on his lap.

“Look, Sehun,” Geun said. “Kai is a big boy. Bites are something he’s very used to. But he can handle himself. However, I would really appreciate it if you tried to be friends with him instead.”

Sehun felt ashamed. He realized that he did not like disappointing Geun.

“He might look all tough. But he’s a total softie,” said Geun.

“ _Dad_!” came Kai’s angry protest from the stairs. Geun smirked at Sehun and winked. As Kai hurried down the staircase, Sehun took note of his nice shirt, pants, shiny shoes, and hair that was all combed again.

“Sehun wants to talk to you about something,” Hana told her son as Kai reached the bottom of the stairs. He was no longer looking at anyone but Sehun.

“Really?” he let out, and there were stars in his bright, limpid eyes.

Sehun stood up. He was brave again. “Yes,” he told Kai.

Kai cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, we can… talk outside.” He glanced up at his parents and scowled. Geun shrugged while Hana only smiled.

Sehun bowed his head and started for the porch. He knew Kai was following.

Once outside, Sehun stopped and turned around to face the boy. Kai stopped, too. He was holding his breath. His bronze skin could not hide the blush that turned his cheeks scarlet. He looked down, hands at his back.

“So…” he mumbled. “What… is… it?”

Sehun wanted to slap him. Kai was acting like Sara whenever she saw Tom!

“I’m… sorry,” Sehun got it out. It did not sound sincere, but at least it was out.

Kai looked at his eyes again, blinking. “Sorry?”

“Yes. For biting…” He paused to glance at Kai’s ear. There was no sign of any biting.

“Oh,” muttered Kai. “That’s… all right.”

Sehun nodded once. “Okay. Good.” He started to turn around. He halted in his tracks again and gasped, jumping back. He almost bumped into Kai.

“What’s wrong?!” Kai bayed.

Sehun pointed to the ground. “A _nya!_ The place is full of them!” His eyes were beginning to water again.

Kai peeped over Sehun’s shoulder from behind. “A… what?”

“A _nya!_ There! And there’s another one there! And there!”

Kai grimaced and frowned as he spotted the _nya_ Sehun was pointing at. “It’s an… earthworm. They’re harmless.”

“No, they’re not! They’re gross and ugly.”

That made Kai snicker and if Sehun were being honest, the boy did not have a bad laugh. It sounded nice.

“I’ll protect you from the… _nyas_ ,” Kai said and crouched to pick up the slimy thing with his bare hand. He then tossed it into the grass. “There. The path to your bike is cleared.”

That was the… most heroic thing Sehun had ever seen anyone do.

It would be the first time he saw Kai as a hero. Not that he’d ever admit it. He scowled at the boy.

“I told you. I don’t need you to protect me!”

“But I _will_ ,” Kai said, eyebrows furrowed sadly. “I will and I must and I will!”

“Oh, my God. Will you shut up if I say okay?!”

Kai nodded his head vigorously.

“Okay then! Protect me!” Sehun shouted. “But don’t ever say that again! Or I will sit on your chest again!”

That had Kai grinning like a madman. He stuck a hand out. “Friends?”

Sehun stared at the hand for a long moment. It was just like when Geun had held a hand out to him.

_I would really appreciate it if you tried to be friends with him instead…_

With a hard glare and his lips turned down sourly, he took Kai’s hand and gave it a firm shake. “Maybe,” he said and stomped over to his bike.


	6. Chapter 6

Every morning, on his way to school, Sehun would slow down as he biked past the Regnandi house.  Some mornings, Hana waved at him from the porch with a cup in her hand. Other mornings, Chanri was the one waving at him and saying, “Good morning, Cinderella!”

Every afternoon, on his way back home, he was tempted to stop by their house and say hello. But it was a huge risk. His mother might catch him.

One morning, it was Kai who was standing on the porch, grinning at him. He was still in his pyjamas. Sehun wondered when he’d start school. Maybe next term, since summer holidays were well-nigh upon them.

He waved. Sehun waved back. The boy had never seemed so happy.

Another morning, Sehun saw Geun and Hana on the porch. They were talking, wearing serious expressions. Geun looked tense, Hana worried. They did not notice Sehun bike by that day.

Back at his own home, the treehouse was coming along great. Sehun realized how strong his father was. The man did not smell as great as Geun, but he still smelled of timber and cigarette smoke that Sehun had grown to love.

They might be finished with the treehouse in a week or so. It made Sehun leap with exhilaration. He could not wait to build his nest in there. It would be his very own private spot.

A couple of days later, when Sehun was biking home, he was halted by Yixing on the dirt driveway. He had been distracted. Sara was not at school today. She was _always_ there. When Sehun asked Taeyong where she was, Taeyong had simply shrugged and said, “Mom said I don’t have to know.”

Sehun hoped Sara had not fallen ill. He would very much like to show Taeyong and Sara his treehouse before moving his nest there.

“Hey,” Yixing said cheerfully. “Want to have lunch with us? Mom invited.”

Sehun took a moment to process the out-of-the-blue invitation. “Lunch?”

Yixing nodded. “Kai would be happy if you’re there.”

Sehun swallowed hard. He glanced at his own house and then back at the Regnandis’. “I… can’t,” he said disappointedly. “My mother will look for me.”

“Oh. No biggie. What about breakfast tomorrow morning, then?”

That sounded like something Sehun could get away with. He flashed an excited smile. “Okay.”

When he got home that day, he found his mother in front of the TV as she furiously flipped through the channels.

“Mom, I’m home,” Sehun called out.

“I’ve made lunch for us,” his mother chirped and shot up to her feet. Her eyes were darker than usual. Her cheeks were so red.

“Is… everything okay with you, Mommy?” Sehun inquired.

“Yes, why would you ask that?” She hurried to the kitchen. Sehun followed. “I’ve just been busy and distracted and… Well, I made spaghetti.”

Sehun watched her work her way around the kitchen in a frenzy. “Mom?”

She stopped and gripped the counter’s edge, clenching her teeth. “It’s nothing, Sehun. Take your shoes off, put your schoolbag away and come eat.”

“You look…” Sehun did not know the right word. She was all red and anxious and jumpy.

She sighed. Shook her head. Plumped in a chair. “It’s the Regnandis. Their scent is getting stronger. This morning… they must have all shifted. I heard… their callings to each other.”

“What?” Sehun did not understand that, but he wanted to. He wanted to know everything about the Regnandis. And he could never ask about them when his father was around.

His mother looked up at him, frowning. “You’re too young to hear them or to understand.”

“I want to,” Sehun said. “Please, Mommy. Tell me. Tell me about the wolves. I want to know everything.”

Wordlessly, his mother stared at him for a moment. Then she said, “Your father would not approve.”

But father wasn’t here…

“Mommy,” he whimpered.

His mother’s expression softened. “All right. When you’re a little older, you too will hear an Alpha’s calling. Or songs. They might not be calling to you, but you can hear them nonetheless. You can’t always figure out what they’re saying, but you will hear them. And just the sound of their… voices, growls, roars, bays, and howls will… will make you feel some sort of way.” She gathered him in her arms and smiled. “But you don’t worry about that, all right? We’re always going to be here to protect you.”

Sehun wanted to hear Geun’s songs. And Hana’s and Chanri’s. What would they sound like? How would it make Sehun feel?

* * *

He did leave very early for school the next day. Except that he had wound up on the very porch that never failed to make him nervous. He did not have to knock. The door swung open to reveal a short, happy, skinny boy.

“Hey, Sehun,” Kai said in a pitchy voice.

Sehun had thought many times about his deal to be friends with this boy. He was sure he would regret it. And he already had enough friends. He did not need an insufferable Alpha pup following him around like a freak.

“Good morning,” Sehun said, just to be formal. He did not meet Kai’s eyes.

Kai was already blushing. “Good morning,” he squeaked out. “Come in.”

He had cleaned up well. A crisp shirt under a jumper, black pants, nice shoes, hair swept tidily. He even smelled like cologne. Was he an eleven-year-old kid or George Clooney…

Sehun scoffed.

“Hello, Sehun,” he heard Geun say from the hallway. His heart jumped.

“Hello, sir,” he mumbled shyly.

“Drop the sir. You can just call me Geun.” He smiled and looked to his second son. “He insisted that he got the door for you. He’s been waiting by it since 6:30.”

When Sehun glanced back at Kai, he was both blushing and scowling at his father.

“Oh, you made it,” Hana said when she appeared. “This way, Sehun. There’s pancakes, bacon, eggs, sausages, orange juice. Help yourself to anything you want.” As she ushered Sehun into the dining area, Kai quickly followed.

The table was full. And they were all grinning at Sehun.

“Good morning, Sehun,” they said in unison as though rehearsed. Sehun felt out of place, like a fish out of water.

“Sit,” Chanri said, patting an empty chair next to her. “Saved you a seat between me and Kai.”

Sehun did not want to sit beside Kai, but he voiced no protest as he awkwardly took his seat. Everyone’s plate was empty. For now.

“You’re going to school today?” Chanri asked. Sehun nodded. “Sweet. Yixing and I will tag along with you after we’re done.”

Sehun didn’t know if that was a great idea. He did not want to be seen outside with any of the Regnandis.

Hana fixed him a plate before she told her kids to help themselves. And that was when it began. Sehun froze in place as the Regnandi children except Kai brawled and clawed at each other violently as they grabbed the foods laid out before them on the table. Kai sat quietly in his chair beside Sehun and stared at him with wonders in his eyes. His nose twitched every now and then as though to sniff at Sehun.

“Kids!” Geun yapped, though friendlily. “We have a guest. What did I say about behaving yourselves today?”

They settled back in their chairs and looked at Sehun again.

“Why are we eating with him?” Jaehyun groaned, stuffing a hunk of sausage into his mouth.

“Jaehyun,” his father chided softly.

“No, seriously. He’s an Omega.”

“Jaehyun, that’s enough. Eat.” Geun sounded serious now. Jaehyun fell quiet.

Sehun blinked at Jaehyun, who was glaring viciously at him as he shoved another sausage into his mouth.

“Sehun, eat up,” Hana said pleasantly.

Sehun glanced at everyone at the table one more time. There was Jeni in her seat next to her mother. Geun at one end of the table. Yixing and Jaehyun on the other side of the table. Chanri and Kai on either side of Sehun. He scooped up a forkful of scrambled eggs and tasted them. It was buttery and fluffy. He liked it.

“So, Sehun. What do your parents do? For a living, I mean,” Geun inquired.

“My father works at _François’ Lumber Co_ and my mother stays home,” Sehun answered politely.

“I see.”

Silence again. Sehun could tell that this made the boisterous Regnandis uncomfortable. He tried to eat as fast as he could so that he could get out of here.

“A non-shifting male Omega is possibly the only worse thing than a human,” Jaehyun scoffed after a while all of a sudden.

“Shut up, you mouth-breather,” Chanri shot at her brother.

“Chanri, language,” Geun said. “And Jaehyun, hold your tongue if you don’t want to get grounded.”

“Ugh!” Jaehyun jolted up to his feet and stormed out of the room. Geun and Hana sighed.

The rest of the breakfast went fine. Chanri cracked a few jokes. Yixing too. Geun and Hana asked Sehun more about his family and friends. Kai just stayed quiet and watched Sehun like a momma hawk watching her babies. Jeni played with her food.

After breakfast, he took off to school with Chanri and Yixing, who were on their own bikes. He waved Geun and Hana goodbye and only gave Kai a sour stare before riding away.

* * *

Breakfasts at the Regnandis’ soon became a regular thing. Sehun was starting to feel comfortable around the family of Alphas. Jaehyun rarely talked to him and whenever he did, he’d only take jibes at Sehun. More often than not, Sehun missed most of the meanings of his insults.

Sara returned to school. She wore her hair different now. Before her absence at school, she always wore her hair in braids. Now, she tied it in a ponytail and she smiled more at Tom.

When Sehun asked why she was away from school, she refused to tell him because he was still a kid.

That made Sehun mad. He was not a _kid_ anymore. He had seen many _penises_.

As the days passed by, things at home started to get a little weirder. His mother was jumpier than ever. And whenever his father was home, the man busies himself tirelessly with the treehouse, regardless of day or night. Sometimes, he drank so much that he conked out on the floor. Sehun’s mother told him that it helped keep his father sane and ignore the Alphas’ songs.

When the treehouse was finally built, and the rope ladder was done, his father looked both gratified and upset. Probably because he did not have anything else to distract him from the Regnandis anymore.

“You want to go check it out?” he asked Sehun, smiling nevertheless. Sehun could barely hold his excitement back as he leaped up the rope ladder and climbed into the treehouse.

It was big enough for four big people! It would be perfect for his nest. For him. And for his Soulbinder.

The next day, he invited Sara and Taeyong to come check out his new treehouse. They were excited to see it, too.

* * *

“It’s wonderful,” Sara commented as she crawled around the empty treehouse. “I wish we had a treehouse of our own.”

“Well, we can hang out here whenever we want, right?” Taeyong said.

“No,” Sehun gasped. “You can’t.”

They stared at him.

“I mean… Father wouldn’t allow.” Sehun lied. He was full of lies now. What’s one more, right?

“Should we go to Carlos’ for a bite after this?” Taeyong suggested at length.

“No. I’m not in the mood to eat,” Sara sighed, hugging her knees to her chest.

“Why?” Sehun inquired.

“Don’t ask,” Taeyong groaned, rolling his eyes. “It’s Tom drama.”

“Oh. What about Tom?”

Sara frowned. “I asked him out. Like… on a date.”

That was a surprise. And gross. Sehun could not picture Sara with a _boyfriend_. Boyfriends were gross. Boys were gross. Tom was gross. Taeyong was gross. Kai was gross.

“You did?”

“Yes. And it was… embarrassing.”

“He said no?”

“He was so shocked that he just kept quiet,” Sara muttered sadly. “He didn’t say anything. So, I ran away.”

“It sounds funny,” Taeyong remarked.

“Well, it wasn’t! The love of my life didn’t want to go out with me.”

“You ran. How would you know what his answer could have been?” Sehun said. “You should have stayed and heard him out. Even though, I’m going to warn you, _boyfriends_ are not… nice things.”

Sara blinked. “Why would you say that? How do you know? You’ve never had a boyfriend before.”

“Technically.” Sehun scowled. Why was it that when he said things that they didn’t know it was unacceptable? But when they told him things he didn’t know, they were right?!

“It’s just one of those things his belly button tells him,” Taeyong said.

Sehun nodded his head eagerly. “Yes. I just know it.”

Sara shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Boyfriends are great. I’m going to prove it to you when I have one.”

“Maybe it’ll be Tom,” Sehun said. “Are you going to ask him again?”

Sara mulled over it for a minute, pouting. “I don’t know… I want a boyfriend… And I want Tom to be my boyfriend. But I don’t know…”

“We’ll go ask him!” Sehun announced. “We will convince him to be your boyfriend. Let’s go find a boyfriend!”

Taeyong looked like he was going to object, but then he shrugged. “If it’ll shut you up for the rest of the days, then let’s,” he said.

They climbed down the treehouse and grabbed the bikes and started for Tom’s house.

On their way, Sehun was forced to a stop by the sight of Kai on the dirt road. His eyes were all starry again and he waved at Sehun.

“That’s Kai, isn’t it?” Taeyong asked.

“Yes,” Sehun spat through his grit teeth.

“He’s cute,” Sara said.

“Tom!” Sehun warned her.

Kai was walking toward them. “Hi,” he greeted everyone but mostly Sehun.

“Hey, Kai,” Sara said, letting go of her handlebar momentarily to shake Kai’s hand. “Remember me?”

“Yes. You’re Sara. And that’s Taeyong. Sehun tells us a lot about you two.” He giggled. Sehun wanted to throw a rock at him. Why was he acting all cute now?

“He does?” Sara gazed at Sehun with a cheeky look.

“Where are you off to?” Kai asked. Sehun had never heard him talk so much.

“We’re going to get a boyfriend,” Sehun answered him curtly and sternly.

That moment, Kai’s face wilted like a flower on the hottest day of summer. His eyes flashed red and he quickly lowered them. When he spoke again, he said, “A… A boyfriend?”

“Yes,” Sehun pushed him further because he was intrigued by Kai’s strange reaction. The boy looked unbelievably sad when he looked up at Sehun again.

“B-Boyfriend… for whom?” he asked, voice breaking.

“For my sister,” Taeyong said. “She has the sweets for a guy from our class.”

Sehun watched the life return to Kai’s face as his lips stretched back into a full smile. Weirdo.

“Oh! Why didn’t you say so!” He took a big breath of relief and smiled at Sehun again.

“You want to come along?” Taeyong offered.

“No!” Sehun said. “It’s _our_ mission. He’s not a friend.”

“You said we’re friends,” Kai countered Sehun.

Sehun scowled at him. “I said _maybe_ , and that doesn’t count as friends.”

“He can tag along if he wants to,” Taeyong said. “The more of us, the more intimidated Tom will be, and he’ll agree to dating my sister.”

“I don’t think you should scare him like that,” Kai said with a frown. “That’s not how it’s supposed to work.”

“That is exactly how it’s supposed to work,” Sehun told him. God, must he educate this weirdo, too? “You love someone, you go to their house, you knock on their door, and you _make_ them love you. Yell at them. Scare them. They’ll say yes.”

Kai grimaced. “Huh? That’s not… what my parents told me to do…”

“You have to be smart to know all this,” Sehun scoffed. “You should come along. I will show you how it’s done.”

Kai was obviously not going to say no. He nodded excitedly and told them to wait while he got his bike.

They biked to Tom’s house. Kai stayed close to Sehun.

Upon arriving at their destination, Sara had second thoughts. “Maybe we shouldn’t do this,” she said. “I’m… already so embarrassed.”

“You stay behind me,” Sehun said before turning to Kai. “You too.”

Kai blinked confusedly but did as he was told.

Ordinary humans never scared Sehun. So, he walked up to the porch and rang the doorbell that was thankfully in his reach.

“What if his parents are home?” Sara whispered from behind.

Kai looked curious. Eyes all wide, nose all scrunched up. Taeyong, for once, was excited.

The door opened, and Tom gaped at them. His red hair was a tousled mess and he was in his pyjama pants that had baby lambs. “What are you all doing he—”

“Good evening, Tom,” Sehun said in a businessman voice he had heard his father use many times. Tom quietly rubbernecked them. “Sara loves you. Why won’t you love her back?”

“Oh, God,” Sara groaned. Tom looked at her now.

Sehun then took a deep breath. “WHY WON’T YOU LOVE HER BACK, TOM?!” he screamed in Tom’s face.

Tom’s face reddened in horror. “I do! I do!” he blurted out in fear.

Sehun smiled.

“You do?” asked Sara. “But… when I asked you out, you didn’t say anything.”

“That’s because I was so surprised,” Tom said. “You’re the prettiest girl in our grade. I… I… like you.”

Sehun bowed his head and stepped away. Kai and Taeyong followed him to their bikes. “That’s how you do it,” he told Kai, prodding a finger into the boy’s chest.

“Wow,” Kai let out. “I can’t believe that worked.”

Sehun had never been more proud of himself than he was that day.

They went to _Carlos’ Diner_ afterwards, where they all got milkshakes and burgers, and Sara gushed endlessly about how Tom was now her boyfriend. Kai sat close to Sehun in the booth and laughed a lot at everything they talked about. That day, Sara and Taeyong became Kai’s friends, too.

And Sehun was surprisingly fine with it.

* * *

Three days later, the most terrible thing happened.

Hana made sandwiches and pineapple tarts for breakfast.

“Any plans for summer break?” Chanri asked Sehun at the table.

Sehun shook his head. “We don’t go on vacations. What about you?”

“Dad usually takes us to the mountains for a couple of weeks,” Yixing answered.

Sehun did not know why that made him sad. Well, he did. That meant a couple of weeks without seeing the Regnandis. Without breakfast at the Regnandis. Being close to the three Alphas more regularly now calmed Sehun’s nerves. There was a price to pay, though. He had already seen most of the Regnandis naked three times now.

Hana told him to get used to it, but he could never get used to seeing _penises_. Though he never saw Kai naked again after that first accident. Kai made sure he was always in his best clothes when Sehun was around.

He looked at Hana and Geun by the sink counter. Geun had his arm curled around her waist, his nose nuzzling into her hair by the neck. She chuckled softly and tried to push him away, but he only pulled her close and kissed her cheek.

“We heard that Kai had made new friends,” Chanri said.

“Taeyong and Sara,” Kai spoke up for the first time since Sehun had been here. He sounded happy about that.

“Humans,” Jaehyun snorted.

“At least they’re not ‘invisible’ like _your_ friends, Jaehyun,” Yixing spat at him.

Jaehyun glowered at him.

“I should get going,” Sehun said. “I’m going to be late for school.”

Chanri and Yixing got up with him, too. Geun and Hana started bidding them a good day before they froze. Geun’s eyebrows drew into a scowl at once. He pulled away from his wife and frowned at Sehun.

“Come with me, Sehun,” he then said and ushered Sehun toward the front door.

What was going on?

As soon as they were out on the porch, Sehun saw them. His heart either died or hid itself in his stomach. Either way, he stopped breathing.

His father stood in the driveway, hands balled into fists at his sides.

His mother was not looking up, but she stood near to her husband.

“I knew it when you always came home smelling like them,” his father snapped. “Sehun, you get your butt here right this instant!”

Sehun’s eyes watered. He could not move his feet. He was more sad than afraid. Now that his parents knew, he was never going to be able to come here again.

“Now, there’s no need for all that,” Geun said in a steady voice. “We’ve not been causing any distress to your son.”

“We’ll be the judge of that,” his father yapped at Geun. Sehun hated him for it. How could he be so rude to Geun?

Everyone gathered on the porch behind Geun. Kai looked just as miserable when he came to stand next to Sehun.

His hand that shyly curled around Sehun’s fingers almost made Sehun jump with a start.

“Sehun, I said you come here!” his father shouted monstrously now. Sehun looked up at Geun with tears in his eyes. He did not want to go. But what choice did he have? Geun would not stop this, would he? Sehun did not mean anything to him.

He then looked down at Kai’s hand in his. Kai’s own eyes started glistening with tears as Sehun began to pull his hand away and start toward his parents.

“You’re in very big trouble,” his father spat as Sehun walked over to him. “You disobeyed me and went behind my back. To fraternize with these—”

“All right. That’s enough,” Geun said in a voice and tone Sehun had never heard him use before. He climbed down the porch with two great steps and approached Sehun’s father and mother. “You dare to walk up to my territory and exercise your authority here?”

Sehun saw his father’s face pale and eyes turn dark with panic. His lips began to quiver, and his shoulders trembled.

 “He might be your son but if I say he’s mine, he’s mine,” Geun growled. He looked taller than he usually was. Shoulders broader. Teeth sharper. Eyes golden. Sehun’s father’s pupils dilated. “Do you understand? Just like how you are mine, too. All of you.”

His father crumbled then. And so did his mother. They both dropped to their knees and bowed their heads.

“Alpha,” his father cried in whispers. Sehun had never seen the man cry. And he sounded like he was begging. “ _Alpha_.”

Geun huffed heavily. “Get up.” He took hold of Sehun’s father’s arms and helped him stand again before he pulled his mother up. They both looked like they were going to pass out. “I want our families to be friends. Even though it may seem impossible to you.”

Hana went over to them with a smile. “Sehun has been nothing but a delight to us. We promise you, we will protect him. Just like how we will all protect you. Aequuses or not.”

* * *

Once their families had become friends, there were more breakfasts and lunches and dinners. Sehun and his parents were always invited to the Regnandis, and although Sehun had suggested many times that they invited the Alphas for dinner at their place, his parents never gave it any thought. They eventually told him that a Regnandi, in spite of everything, would never go so far with an Aequus, even if they were friends.

Both his parents were in better moods now. They went over to the Regnandis at least twice a week and looked like they were going to die from happiness every time Geun and Hana hugged them. They hadn’t hugged Sehun yet, though. Which made Sehun bitter about the whole thing. He wanted to climb Geun and hug him, too.

The summer holidays kicked in. Sehun shifted his nest to the treehouse. Tom was Sara’s boyfriend. Jaehyun talked more to Sehun. Everything was wonderful in Oakenbury.

Two weeks after the start of summer vacation, everyone was fine with Kai accompanying Sehun to the town. Even his parents. It would be the first time Sehun had ever gone to the town without them. But he was getting older. He should be more independent, his father told him. And he said he didn’t think Sehun would get hurt so long Kai was with him. His parents like Kai.

Mostly because Kai cajoled them endlessly. He loved to sweet-talk them, offered them a lot of creampuffs and coffees. He’d say Sehun’s mother is beautiful. She’d giggle and tell him how sweet he was. He’d tell Sehun’s father that he looked so strong. His father took the compliment so well. Sehun wanted to kill them all during those moments. He often dropped by, although he never came inside, and brought Sehun’s parents gifts. None of them were for Sehun.

He was not particularly happy about Kai following him to the town, though.

“What should we do?” Kai asked, parking his bike in the bike rack after Sehun.

“Let’s get ice-creams,” Sehun said. They walked over to the ice-cream man and purchased two chocolate ice-cream cones.

“What do we do now?” Kai asked, licking his ice-cream.

Sehun pointed to the CD store across the street. “Let’s go rent a movie.”

“We’re too young. They won’t rent a movie to us.”

“You’re rich. Can’t you do it?”

“I don’t think being rich means you get an unlimited access to everything.”

Sehun groaned. He licked a blob of ice-cream that trickled down his thumb.

“What movie do you want to watch?” Kai then asked.

Sehun rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t know. Something bad. Like the ones adults watch.”

Kai’s eyes bulged. He then choked. His cheeks crimsoned. “Wh-What?”

“Like the one Taeyong wouldn’t stop talking about it. _You’re A Sick Pork._ ”

“I don’t think I’ve heard about that one…”

“It’s supposed to have cool dinosaurs.”

“Oh. _Jurassic Park_?”

“What?”

“It’s called _Jurassic Park_. I saw it the other day. It’s cool.”

Sehun scowled. But he decided to not to fight with Kai over it.

“Sehun? Kai!” he heard Sara’s voice from behind and turned around to see her and Taeyong riding their bikes towards them. “What are you doing here?!”

“Hey, Sara!” Kai called out. “Taeyong!”

“You’re getting ice-cream? Like couples on date,” Taeyong said. Sehun watched Kai’s cheeks turn red again.

Sehun tossed his ice-cream away. “No! We just biked here and thought of renting a movie.”

“Oh. Sounds boring. Want to go with us to the woods?” Sara invited.

Sehun gasped. “To the woods? Really?” He was already grinning.

“Yes. It’s really warm today. It’s the perfect day for an adventure in the forest!”

He frowned. “But my parents told me to never go into the woods.”

“Why? Because they’re afraid bears will eat you? Are _you_ afraid?” Taeyong asked.

Sehun snarled at him. “Of course, I’m not afraid!”

“Then come along!”

After thinking about for less than a minute, Sehun decided this could be his new secret now that he no longer had any secrets to keep from his parents.

“Okay. Wait for me while I get my bike.”

“What about you, Kai? Are you afraid of the woods, too?” Taeyong shot at Kai.

Kai laughed. “Of the woods? Me?”

“Then you’re coming, too!”

Kai’s laughter died, and he gnawed at his bottom lip for a moment. “I don’t know. Maybe we shouldn’t go. My parents told me to not to wander too far from home.”

“Fine. Then you stay,” Sehun told him.

Kai caught his arm. “No. You shouldn’t go either.”

Sehun yanked his arm free. “No. I’m going.”

Kai’s brows dipped low. “But…” he started whispering. “I’m supposed to protect you.”

“I don’t need you to.” He wended his way to his bike. After a moment of contemplating and frowning, Kai hurried after him. “I thought you didn’t want to go.” Sehun smirked.

“I go wherever you go.”

 _I go wherever you go…_ Sehun liked the sound of that even if he was convinced he did not like going anywhere with Kai.

* * *

They leaned their bikes against the trees before wandering into the forest. It was not too far away from Sehun’s neighbourhood, he realized.

He took it all in. The dirt, the leaves, the trees. It made his heart full. He felt at home.

Sara giggled as she tried to climb onto a branch. Taeyong imitated her.

Sehun grappled his arms around a tree and hugged it. Kai watched him with a funny look.

“What?” Sehun hissed at him.

“Nothing,” Kai said quickly. “It’s just that… you look so happy.”

“I am happy. I don’t know why. But the forest makes me happy.”

Kai smiled at that. “It makes me happy, too. It’s because we’re…” he trailed off, glancing at Taeyong and Sara. They then wandered further into the forest. Taeyong said that he wanted to find the river.

“Guys!” Sara eventually cried out, crouching on the ground. “Come check this out!”

“What is it?” Sehun asked as he joined her side. He then noted the large pawprints etched in the loam.

“What do you think this was?” Sara asked.

Kai dropped to one knee and brought his fingers to the pawprint. He then sniffed his fingers. “Wolves,” Kai whispered, eyebrows furrowing. “It’s still fresh.”

“Haha. That’s funny. You’re like a dog detective,” Taeyong said.

“No,” Kai said, rising back to his feet. “We need to get out of here.”

“We haven’t found the river yet!” Taeyong said.

“Yes! And I wanted to climb the highest branch!” Sara added.

“If you want to go, you go,” Sehun told Kai.

Kai looked like he was about to freak out. His skin was turning red. He glanced around him frantically as though he were in a panic. His nose was twitching like crazy as he sniffed wildly. Then his eyes flashed red.

“No! We must get out of here right now!” he pleaded Sehun as one of his hands flew up to grab Sehun’s.

Sehun pulled it back when Kai tried to tug at it. “What is wrong with you?!”

“Yeah…” Sara muttered, staring at Kai. “You’re… flushed red.”

Then Sehun smelled it, too. The foul stench. It smelled nothing like the scent of his parents or the Regnandis.

Kai started to whimper as he spun around to look at everywhere in a frenzy. Then he howled. He howled like a baby wolf. But it was still a wolf’s howl.

Taeyong and Sara only gaped at him stupidly.

“Oh, my God,” Sara let out a brief moment later, sounding like she might cry. “Holy shit.”

Sehun turned around and looked at what had her frightened like she had seen a ghost. It stopped Sehun in his tracks, too.

There were two of them. Grey wolves. Eyes flaring with ferocity. The leaves rustled as they made slow, steady advances. They were _huge_ , fangs bared and eyes in the shade of orange.

“What do we do?” Taeyong mewled out shakily.

The grey wolves were looking at Kai now. They snarled and barked lightly. Kai took a step back, positioning himself in front of Sehun, Sara and Taeyong. He looked just as scared as them, but he was no coward. Sehun had learned that when he picked up a _nya_ with his bare hand.

As the Grey wolves edged nearer, Kai whimpered again like a hurt dog.

And then he jolted forward and lunged at the grey wolves. Sehun gasped and cried out his name and almost covered his eyes with his hands as the grey wolves charged toward Kai.

They were three times Kai’s size.

 _“_ No _… Kai!_ ” Sehun screamed before he saw Kai burst into a small white wolf right before his eyes. His clothes were ripped apart, and so was his skin. His fur as white as snow was a complete contrast to those ruby-red pools of eyes. He shifted so seamlessly.

He was not a pup. But he was not a fully-grown wolf either. He was still way smaller than the two grey wolves.

And he was already pouncing on them.

Sehun heard it then. The song. It was all around him.

 _Dad! Dad! Dad!_ He heard Kai cry and howl.

 _I’m coming! I’m coming! Stay safe! Run! Don’t fight! Don’t fight! Run, son! Run!_ He heard Geun’s frantic voice, too.

Kai was not running. He was fighting. And losing. And Sehun was crying.

If he ran, the grey wolves would attack Sehun and his friends.

So, Kai fought. His little paws clawed at one of the wolf and left a gnarly mark on its face. It retaliated with twice the force and snared one of Kai’s hindlegs in its mouth and sank its fangs into it. Kai howled and growled in pain as blood soaked his velvety white fur.

The other wolf lurched forward and bit into the back of Kai’s neck before lifting him off the ground and hurling him across the forest floor.

Sehun could Geun’s devastating cry.

Then the grey wolves threw themselves at Kai, who could no longer get back up on his feet. Sehun ran forward without a clue of what he would do. He’d probably die but he was not going to let his friend die alone.

_I go wherever you go._

He heard the loudest roar that thundered to break all the silence in Oakenbury before he saw a massive black wolf, in the size of the two grey wolves combined, dart through the trees. It vaulted off the ground and pounced on the grey wolves mercilessly.

Its paws struck the grey wolves down before it sank its fangs into their necks and killed them.

When it raised its head, Sehun recognized those golden eyes.

Geun.

He hurried over to the white wolf that was whimpering in pain on the ground and licked the wound on his hindleg. As the black wolf nudged its nose against Kai’s face and licked it, Sehun wiped the tears from his face.

Geun secured his teeth around the back of Kai’s neck and lifted him off the ground to carry him back home.

Sehun finally breathed again. He turned to Sara and Taeyong, who had their mouths hanging open, both hiding behind a tree.


	7. Chapter 7

“You kids should be getting home,” Sehun’s father said when he walked out of the Regnandi house and found Sehun, Sara, and Taeyong perched on the porch steps.

None of them had uttered a single word since they had followed the black wolf back to the Regnandis’ residence.

Both Taeyong and Sara barely even looked at each other. It had been hours, and the sun was starting to set in the horizon as hues of salmon and purple painted the sky.

Sehun had not been able to move much either. He could not even brave himself to enter the house as Geun carried the wounded white wolf inside with Hana, Chanri, Yixing, Jaehyun, and Jeni sobbing. Hana had taken her bleeding son away from the black wolf and cradled the pup in her arms as she rushed inside.

Sehun’s parents eventually came over. They must have heard the Regnandis’ distressed howls, too.

“How is he, Daddy?” Sehun asked, rising to his feet, and looked up at his father with tearful eyes.

His father clapped a hand to his shoulder. “He’s healing. He’s asleep. He will be fine, Sehun.” He glanced at the flummoxed siblings, who looked more confused than terrified now. “Sara. Taeyong.”

They rose from the steps and faced Sehun’s father. But neither of them said anything.

“I need you two to keep this a secret. Can you do that?”

They did not answer. They seemed too petrified to even open their mouths. Sehun stepped forward, frowning.

“Please, guys,” he implored them. “It’s confusing. I know. It still is to me, too. But please, don’t tell anybody. This has to be a secret.”

Taeyong stared at him for a moment. He finally spoke. “Our… secret?”

Sehun nodded his head. “If you told anyone, I could be in danger. My family and Kai and Kai’s family.”

Sara’s eyebrows knitted at that. “We wouldn’t want you to be in danger,” she said in a soft voice.

“Then please. Don’t tell anyone.” Sehun knew he could trust them. They held many of his secrets.

Sara and Taeyong exchanged a worried glance before confronting Sehun again. “How did he…” Sara began to ask but trailed off.

“Wolves,” Sehun said. “Shapeshifters.” He would tell them what he knew about the shifters.

They turned ashen. “I would say that’s crapola but I just… saw it happen,” Taeyong let out breathlessly. “Right before my eyes…”

“Are you…” Sara asked.

Sehun shook his head. “No, I’m not.”

“Sehun, his mother and I are only descendants of the wolves. We can’t shift like the Regnandis. We’re as normal as you are,” Sehun’s father said. It was not a complete truth. They were not all normal. Sehun certainly was not as normal as Sara and Taeyong.

Sara loosened her ponytail. “I understand, Mr. Oh,” she said, sounding confident suddenly. “I’ve always known we weren’t alone in this world.”

“So, you’ve always known there were shapeshifters?!” Taeyong shot at her sister. “Quit pulling our legs, Sara.”

She scowled at him. “Of course, I didn’t know there were shapeshifters and wolves that could… Ugh. I knew there was something!”

“Can we trust you two to keep this between ourselves?” Sehun’s father interfered.

Sara bowed her head in agreement. A moment later, Taeyong did, too.

“Yes. You have our word,” Sara said. “We won’t breathe a word of this to anyone. Besides, even if we did, who’d believe us? We’re just kids.”

Taeyong sighed. “That’s true.”

Sehun would believe them. And he wasn’t a kid anymore.

“Thank you. Now I suggest you get home before it gets dark.”

Sara saluted and started climbing down the steps, yanking her brother with her. She paused to look back at Sehun. “Can we visit Kai when he’s feeling better?”

“If Geun will have you, then of course,” Sehun’s father said.

That made both Sara and Taeyong smile. They were always up for an adventure. And now that they had found one that it involved werewolves, Sehun had no doubt that they were going to do everything in their power to embark on this adventure.

They had taken it better than Sehun had when he first had the ‘big talk’.

“What were you thinking, Sehun?” his father said after Sara and Taeyong had biked away. Folding his arms over his chest, he glowered down at Sehun.

Sehun had never felt so small, tired, and miserable. He was small because his father was furious with him. He was tired because it had been a long day. He was miserable because he could not get the image of all that blood staining the beautiful fur of the little white wolf out of his head.

“I’m sorry,” he whimpered out, close to tears.

“You should be! You could have died today! We had forbidden you from going to the forest and you dragged your friends _and_ Kai with you! You’re lucky Kai’s family isn’t mad at you, but I am!”

Sehun cowered and shivered. “I’m sorry, Dad,” he wept.

“You are in big trouble. We will discuss your punishments when we get home. I’ll go get your mother.”

“I want to see him,” Sehun blurted out, a sob choking his throat. His father exhaled heavily.

“Sehun, his family’s with him. I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be here. There’s nothing more for us to do.”

Sehun clenched his fists with angry tears stinging his eyes. “He’s hurt because of me!” he screeched. “He wanted to protect _me_! He got hurt for me!”

This came as a surprise to his father. The man retreated a step and blinked at Sehun. “What?”

“He says he wants to protect me. He didn’t run because if he did, I’d be hurt.” Sehun wiped an eye on the back of his fist. “He was so… small. But brave. Small. Scared. But he fought to protect me.” He wanted to curl into a ball in a corner and cry his eyes out. No one had ever done something so brave for him. And he doubted anyone ever would.

“That so?” his father mumbled. Then he ushered Sehun inside. The house was dark. Only a lightbulb in the hallway was lit. Sehun was led upstairs. He could _hear_ the Alphas’ lamenting. It was very quiet, but they sang grieffully. He found his mother in the corridor outside a bedroom.

She pulled Sehun into an embrace and kissed his forehead but said nothing. Withdrawing from her, Sehun peeped into the room and found Yixing, Chanri, Jeni and Jaehyun seated on the floor at the sides of the bed. They had their faces resting on the mattress, all staring at their sleeping brother.

Sehun did not protest when his father and mother returned downstairs, leaving him there.

Kai was bathed and was in his pyjamas, tucked into his blankets. Sehun’s heart skipped a nervous beat before it started hammering against his chest. Geun was back in his human form, his arms enveloped securely around Kai’s body as Kai’s head was settled in the bigger man’s lap. Geun kept softly rubbing his nose against Kai’s cheek, forehead, hair, and temple. Hana sauntered into the room eventually, walking past Sehun, with a bowl of what looked like water in her hands.

“You should all leave now,” she whispered softly to her children, running a gentle hand through Jaehyun’s hair. Jaehyun’s eyes were red when he looked up at his mother. He must have been crying. “He’s just going to sleep.”

They heeded their mother at once and rose to their full heights. Jaehyun stopped to sniff Kai’s hair, nuzzling his nose into it. As he spun around to follow his siblings out of the room, his sad gaze turned furious as it met Sehun. He stomped over to Sehun and glared menacingly.

“I hate you,” he hissed in a whisper to Sehun before walking away.

Sehun was not angry about that. He understood why Jaehyun would hate him. He hated himself now, too.

Hana stroked Geun’s hair next. “You should get some rest, too,” she told her husband.

“I’m not going to rest until I find every last one of those Rexits and rip their heads off,” Geun spat in a low growl, still babying his sleeping son in his arms, kissing Kai’s temple.

“That’s not what we’re here for,” Sehun heard Hana whisper. “He’s a strong wolf. He’ll be all right.”

An hour ago, Hana was the one who had seemed like she had lost every strand of her sanity when she saw her son unconscious and bleeding. But now, she looked so composed and calm. It made Sehun feel calm. But he could also feel Geun’s frustration and rage.

They both looked up Sehun. Hana smiled, Geun looked distracted.

“Come in, Sehun,” Hana said.

Sehun kept his head low as he entered Kai’s bedroom. It was nothing like his own room. Everything was so shiny and expensive-looking. It had a big window that overlooked the driveway. It made Sehun wonder if Kai ever looked out it to look at Sehun in the mornings and afternoons when he biked past the house.

“I’m sorry,” Sehun purred, his voice barely a whisper. “I’m so sorry.” His eyes gave in once more and tears began to streak his face.

“It’s all right,” Hana said. “The important thing is that you’re safe.”

But there was a big chance that they might have not been. They could have all died. They would have had the black wolf not saved them in time.

Sehun glanced at Geun sadly. “Are you… disappointed?” he asked in a small voice.

Geun’s expression turned hard. “Yes, I am, Sehun.”

Sehun dropped his head and winced like a kicked puppy.

“You’ve put yourself, your friends, and my son in danger today. Forget about your human friends but you should have known better.”

It was not fair that everyone was blaming Sehun for it.

“Honey,” Hana muttered to Geun. “He’s a child. Like our Kai. They didn’t mean to get into trouble.” She then turned to Sehun. “But you mustn’t do it again, Sehun. Listen to the adults. Do you understand?”

Sehun nodded his head. “I’m sorry.” He looked at Kai again. He was breathing. He was human. He was the same Kai that stood on the dirt driveway and said that Sehun smelled funny. But something was different.

“Can I… stay with him… tonight?” Sehun asked shyly.

Geun and Hana stared at him expressionlessly for a moment before Geun said, “You don’t have to. It’s all right, Sehun. He will be fine. Shifters heal fast, although the little ones do take some extra time.”

That did not ease Sehun’s mind at all. He moved closer to the bed and brought his hands to the mattress. He took a closer look at Kai and frowned. “Please?” he asked quietly.

“You can stay for a while,” Hana said at last. “But you must go home tonight. We’ll have to keep Kai to ourselves for the night. But you can come see him first thing in the morning.”

Sehun supposed he was okay with that.

Geun carefully settled his son back on the bed as he rose to his feet. “Keep an eye on him until I’m back?” he asked Sehun, flashing a small smile. It warmed Sehun’s heart again.

“Yes,” Sehun whispered.

As Geun and Hana left him in charge to look after Kai for a moment, he pulled the chair from the desk close to the bed’s side and sank in it. He did not take his eyes off Kai for even second after that. There was a cut on Kai’s left forefinger. It was not bleeding, but it still frightened Sehun. Why hadn’t they put a plaster on it, he wondered.

But they did say he’d heal fast.

Sehun leaned in and lifted the blanket just enough to peep under. Kai’s leg was bandaged. They didn’t even bring him to the hospital.

He wiped a tear away. He knew Kai was asleep and the boy could not hear him. But he wanted to tell Kai how much he felt like hitting Kai’s head with something hard. Like a baseball bat or a brick. The boy was such an idiot—a word Sehun never used before but had heard Sara use many times.

“You should have run,” Sehun murmured, sniffling. He surveyed Kai’s face next. He looked tolerable like this. Not gawking at Sehun like a weirdo with stars in his eyes all the time.

He recalled all the times he had been sick. He hated the flu as much as he hated mosquitoes and the _nyas_. It made him feel weak and horrible. But whenever he was feeling under the weather, his mother would make him some good chicken soup, and she would tuck him in, sing him lullabies, and kiss his cheeks for him to get well soon. It _always_ worked.

Sehun would bring Kai some of his mother’s chicken soup tomorrow, he decided determinedly.

He rose from his chair and bent over the bed. His little heart was beating so hard that he thought it might explode. But he needed Kai to get better soon.

So, he closed his eyes tightly and pressed a kiss to Kai’s cheek.

“You shouldn’t be taking advantage of a sleeping boy,” came a voice from the doorway that startled Sehun. He jumped back and turned around to see Chanri smirking at him. “Do it when he’s awake next time. He’d be over the moon.”

Sehun did not understand her. “My mother does it. It will help him get better quick,” he rasped.

“Uh-huh,” Chanri scoffed, turned around, and left.

Sehun glanced back at Kai and the booboo on his forefinger. He could kiss the booboo away too like his mother did for all of his booboos. But Sehun didn’t know if that would be crossing a line. Maybe Kai wanted _his_ mother to kiss his booboos away.

Either way, Sehun did not want to take the chances. He wanted to help Kai heal in every way he could. So, he bowed his head and gave the cut on Kai’s finger a quick kiss before he backed away.

When he left Kai that night, he gazed back at the tan boy one last time and thought, _hero…_

* * *

He returned the next morning. He was late. Because his mother took too much time making the chicken soup he had been pestering her to make for Kai. But as soon as it was done, he was back on the Regnandis’ porch with a packed container of hot soup in his hands.

He was eager to know if Kai had woken up. If he was feeling better. If he didn’t, even after all those kisses, Sehun was _sure_ the soup would make him feel better.

Hana got the door. “What’s that?” she asked.

Sehun held up the container. “Chicken soup. I asked Mommy to make some for Kai.”

Hana chuckled and accepted the soup. “That is very thoughtful of you, Sehun. I’m sure Kai will have it all for himself. Do you want to come in?”

Of course, he did.

“He’s upstairs in his room,” Hana said. Sehun looked around the house. It was emptier than usual. He knew at least Geun, Chanri and Yixing weren’t home.

As Hana mended her way into the kitchen, Sehun hurried upstairs with his backpack.

He only caught his breath once he was standing in Kai’s bedroom. The boy was up, eyes ballooned, back resting against the headboard of his bed. He had a video game controller in his hands.

“Sehun,” he squealed out like a girl.

Taking his backpack off, Sehun walked over to the bed. “My parents told me I don’t have to go to school today so that I can visit you,” he said.

Kai was only staring and swallowing hard.

Placing the backpack on the bed, Sehun unzipped it. “I brought you something to help you feel better.”

Kai put the controller aside and sat up straighter. Sehun briefly glanced at the boy’s forefinger. The booboo was gone. The kiss had worked.

Sehun smiled to himself and fished out Mr. Giraffe from his bag. He watched Kai’s eyes go dark and wide with curiosity. “This is Mr. Giraffe,” Sehun said. “He’s a very good friend and he always helped me get well when I was sick. So, here. I’m letting you have him for a while until you get better.”

It had not been an easy decision to make. Sehun had to brood long and hard about it all night. In the end, he came to the conclusion that Kai had risked his life to save Sehun’s. It was the least Sehun could do.

So, he brought Mr. Giraffe over to let Kai borrow him.

Kai’s chest started to heave as his lips parted. He was panting for air, his eyes focused on the stuffed animal. He sat up, pushed the blanket aside and curled his hands around Mr. Giraffe. Sehun let the toy go.

Kai inspected it like a wild animal for a moment. He sniffed it. Oh, he sniffed it good and hard. Sehun almost could not watch. He wanted to take Mr. Giraffe back from the caveman, who was acting like he had never seen a stuffed animal before.

Kai clenched his eyes and hugged the toy to his face. “He smells… like you,” he whined softly. “Like vanilla and melted chocolate and babies and campfires and fireworks.”

Sehun tried to digest that piece of information. But he was stumped. “I smell like… all that?”

Kai opened his eyes and nodded. He sniffed Mr. Giraffe again. “Mostly vanilla and fireworks.”

“Oh,” Sehun exhaled. “You just smell like wet dog to me.”

That made Kai sad. “Oh.”

Sehun bit his lip. He looked around Kai’s room. His gaze landed on the video game on the big TV. “You have a console?”

“Yes,” Kai muttered. “You want to play?”

Sehun had only played video games at Taeyong’s. He climbed into the bed after grabbing another controller. “What games do you have?”

They played video games all morning. Kai’s mother came in once with soup, bread, and some breakfast for Sehun and Kai. Sara and Taeyong visited later in the afternoon. Hana was happy to let them in. She said it was nice to finally meet Kai’s new friends, even though she had already met them at the diner some time ago.

Sara had a lot of questions. Kai tried to answer as many as he could. Those he couldn’t, he just said he didn’t know. By evening, Kai’s leg was mostly healed, and Hana removed the bandages. Sehun was so happy that he even hugged Kai.

Left alone again after Sara and Taeyong took off, Sehun stood by the bed and watched Kai trying to limp around the room.

“It’ll be good as new soon,” Kai said with a smile.

Sehun still had the guilt gnawing at his chest. “Hey,” he called. Kai looked up. “I haven’t… thanked you.”

Kai blinked.

Sehun swallowed. “You… protected me.”

That day, Kai smiled the biggest smile Sehun had ever seen. And he promised Sehun that he’d take very good care of Mr. Giraffe.

When Sehun got home, his parents were waiting for him in the living room.

“Sehun, how is Kai?” his mother inquired.

“Better,” Sehun said. Then a pause.

“So, what is your friendship with Kai like?” his father asked.

Sehun shrugged. “He wanted to be my friend. I said okay.”

His parents looked at each other worriedly. “All right,” his father said. “Go to your room and wash up.”

* * *

Summer ended as fast as it began. School started again. But nothing was the same anymore because Sehun, Sara, and Taeyong had new friends now. Kai and Jaehyun always sat with them at the cafeteria table. All the other kids now looked at Sehun, Sara, and Taeyong funny because they were hanging out with the richest kids in all of Oakenbury.

Sehun had not seen much of the Regnandis toward the end of summer. They had gone away to the mountains for a few weeks. When they returned, the first thing Kai did was head over to Sehun’s house’s fence and call his name.

Before they left, however, Sehun went over to their house almost every day. Taeyong and Sara came by at least thrice a week, and they were welcome to dine at the table. They were getting very used to the wolves. Sara wanted to know if she could become one, too. She couldn’t. Because that was not how it worked apparently.

Whenever they were there, Jaehyun picked on Taeyong ceaselessly, in spite of being a year younger than Taeyong. He’d yank Taeyong’s hair, lick his cheek deliberately, flick his forehead, slap his butt, pull his underwear up, hide his shoes and bike. And in his wolf form, he chased Taeyong around, snarling and threatening to bite him. Taeyong would sprint around the house and the trees that surrounded it screaming and crying. Taeyong eventually stopped dropping by so often, fearing Jaehyun’s tyranny.

Sara was tougher than Taeyong was, so Jaehyun never really picked on her. And even if he tried to, she kicked him back.

Jaehyun did try to yank Sehun’s hair a couple of times. But Kai was always there to protect him. He bared his teeth at his younger brother and shoved Jaehyun away when the latter came too close to Sehun. Enraged, Jaehyun had exploded into a small brown wolf before Kai ripped himself open into a white one. He was way bigger than Jaehyun was, but like Kai, Jaehyun did not shy away from a fight even if the odds were against him.

Sehun forgot to ask Mr. Giraffe back.

His nest in the treehouse was finished.

He eventually _did_ get used to the _penises_. And the _boobs_ and… other lady parts he didn’t know the names of. And he only knew _boobs_ because he had heard some boys from his class talk about them. Chanri shifted when she ran with her brothers to train them whenever their parents couldn’t or were too busy. Taeyong almost ate a hand when he saw her shift back to her human one day.

Kai still never shifted back to his human when Sehun was around, though. And he got teased endlessly by his siblings for that.

But they became friends. For real. Sehun never called him ugly anymore. And he was okay with Kai sniffing him from time to time.

* * *

By the time they turned fourteen and joined high school, they had become best friends. They had more secrets than anyone else. And they went into the forest a lot without anyone knowing until they heard that there was another Rexit attack in Oakenbury.

Kai told Sehun that it was too risky and that he would not allow Sehun to go into the woods anymore. It had maddened Sehun because it wasn’t fair that Kai got to call the shots.

Sehun liked running with Kai in the forest while Kai was in his wolf. And his wolf was growing bigger by the week. And so was his human.

As the days passed, Sehun started to notice Kai. He had really stared to _notice_ and _see_ Kai.

Kai was beginning to stand out in a crowd. He had gained some muscle. He was getting tall super-fast. His face was changing. And so was his voice. Which made Sehun uncomfortable because it was starting to sound like a man’s and deeper than his own.

Yixing matured that summer. Sehun jumped on him one day and finally screamed, _“alpha!alpha!alpha!”_

Kai had been so angry for no reason that he did not talk to Sehun for two days. And to Yixing for a week.

* * *

Sehun asked a girl out for the first time later that year. Her name was Kiena and she was one of the most beautiful girls at school. He was convinced by Taeyong and Sara, who said that she would make a perfect girlfriend.

She said yes.

He found Kai by the lockers that day. Kai lit up bright like a Christmas tree when he saw Sehun walking towards him in the hallway. He grinned.

“You know Kiena?” Sehun asked, stopping a few feet before his friend.

Kai arched an eyebrow and said, “Yeah?”

Sehun sighed. “I’m going out on a date with her.”

Everything that happened next was just loud and red. Sehun saw so much red as Kai slammed his locker shut with a force that thundered through the hallway and dented the locker before he stormed off with a vicious scowl on his face and a snarl on his lips.


	8. Chapter 8

“What did she say?” Sara asked, being nosy like she always liked being. And she knew it. It just did not bother her.

The school cafeteria was buzzing as usual during lunchbreak. But their usual table was _unusually_ empty. Yixing, Chanri, and Kai were absent. Kai was at any of his classes either.

In a corner, at a small table, he spied Sebastián, still sitting alone with a book. But he was bigger now, too. His skin had gotten tanner. He spoke more in class, though. He was the smartest student in Sehun’s grade. The teachers loved him. Too bad he was a social freak.

Sehun had not seen him since he had stridden away so furiously two days ago. Although Sehun had wanted to ask him what was up with that, he had not been able to catch Kai. When he went over to the Regnandi house yesterday morning, Kai had already gone on his morning run with his father and brothers.

If they were all staying away from school, however, then it had to be something wolf-related.

“She said she would love to go out with me,” Sehun said, taking a bite of the cucumber strip. “She didn’t sound so thrilled, though.”

“She should be lucky to have you as her boyfriend. You’re like the prettiest boy in Oakenbury.”

“Bet Jaehyun would disagree,” Taeyong scoffed.

Jaehyun would, actually. Because the jerk was the most self-admiring, vainglorious thirteen-year-old in the world. He had once called Sehun ‘smelly ugly-looking toad’ before he graciously dubbed himself as ‘the Prince of Oakenbury’.

“So, where are you going for your date?” Sara inquired.

“ _Carlos’ Diner_ ,” answered Sehun. “Where else?”

“Hmm. When?”

“Tonight. Seven o’clock. You guys are coming, too.”

“No, we’re not,” Taeyong said. “It’s _your_ date, man. We don’t want to thirdwheel. I’m going to watch some boobs with some other friends tonight. Adult boobs.”

“Ew,” Sehun let out. He had seen adult boobs. But he definitely did not have the disgusting, perverted look Taeyong had on his face right now.

“Taeyong’s right,” Sara said. “You should do your thing with Kiena on your own.”

Sehun frowned. “But I don’t know how to talk to girls.”

“You don’t know how to talk to boys either. Poor Kai,” Taeyong said before, “Ouch!” Sara scowled at him after kicking her brother under the table. “What? I didn’t say anything.”

She shook her head, sighing. “You talk to me, Sehun. And to Chanri and Jeni,” she told Sehun.

“Yeah, but you’re different. You’re practically family.” Sehun exhaled heavily.

“I bet Yixing would know a thing or two about talking to girls,” said Taeyong. “His girlfriend from last year was hot.”

“He broke up with her, didn’t he?” Sara said.

“Yes,” Sehun said.

He did not even know why Yixing was dating her in the first place. Every time she was at the Regnandi house, she just stayed awkwardly quiet. Sehun could tell that Geun and Hana did not particularly like her, but they always smiled at her and treated her friendlily. But they never hugged her or clued her in on their secrets. She was human. And Yixing never once looked at her the same way Geun looked at Hana. After the breakup, Kai told Sehun that Yixing was only dating her because he needed to run up his street cred.

Sehun supposed that was what he was doing with Kiena right now, too. He must be the only fourteen-year-old—who was four months away from turning fifteen—in the grade who hadn’t kissed anyone. Apart from Kai, he assumed. Well, he wasn’t sure. Kai told him most of his things, but maybe he hadn’t told Sehun _all_ of his things. Maybe he had already kissed someone. And that bothered Sehun. He did not like to be outdone by Kai. He wanted to get kissed first.

“Why do you look like you’re plotting someone’s murder?” Sara asked Sehun.

Sehun shrugged. “I haven’t seen Kai for two days.”

“We haven’t either,” Taeyong said. “Did you do something to piss him off again?”

Sehun glared at him. “When have I _ever_ done anything to piss him off?”

“Yixing,” Sara said. “When he matured. And started releasing his Alpha pheromones. Speaking of which, I know I’m human, but he’s turned out to be a total hottie, didn’t he? Wow, like damn. And I mean, his wolf form isn’t bad either. Not bad at all.” She smirked.

Yixing was a black wolf like his father. So was Chanri. Kai and Hana were white. Jaehyun and Jeni were brown, almost close to black.

“Stop it,” Taeyong shot at his sister. “He’s eighteen. You’re fourteen. It’s gross.”

“It’s not like _you_ didn’t drool over Chanri.”

“I don’t anymore.”

“Whatever.”

“Wait,” Sehun said. “What are… pheromones?”

“It’s the right term. The human term at least. I don’t know why you wolf people call it.”

Sehun grimaced. He didn’t know what they called it.

“It’s because of the pheromones you go all cuckoo around Alphas,” Sara said.

“I don’t go… all cuckoo around Alphas,” Sehun mumbled.

“Yes, you do.”

“Which is why you jumped on Yixing that day and shrieked ‘alpha’ until your voice gave in,” Taeyong added.

Sehun would never forget that embarrassing incident. “What does that have to do with this conversation?”

“As an Omega, you react in a certain way around Alphas because of these pheromones,” Sara said. “I did some digging and found out that you’re supposed to go down on all fours and bend over and stick your ass out to an Alpha.”

Sehun wanted to throw up. “Oh, my God!” he cried. “I don’t want to hear this! You guys are not wolves. You know nothing. This is all nonsense.”

“We apparently know more than you do, Sehun.”

“That’s because you’re a couple of nosy doohickeys!”

“Anyway, back to the point,” Taeyong said. “You pissed Kai off that day.”

“Yeah, I know. He was just jealous,” Sehun scoffed. “because his brother is now an Alpha while Kai is still a little boy with little paws and no Alpha scent or… pheromones.”

Taeyong looked at Sara with an arched eyebrow. “Um.”

“I don’t think that’s why he was pissed,” Sara muttered. “You were rubbing yourself all over his brother.”

“So?” Sehun snapped. “Yixing was fine with it! I offended nobody! Kai can be infuriating for no reason.”

Sara and Taeyong shrugged, sighing defeatedly. The bell rang. “Good luck with your date tonight,” Sara said.

Tom and Sara had broken up years ago. They had only been boyfriend and girlfriend for two weeks. And Sara never had a boyfriend since, although she said she had kissed Kevin, a sophomore. So, Sehun did not have much hope for himself and Kiena. He just wanted to kiss her.

And brag about it to Kai, who, Sehun hoped, had never kissed anyone.

* * *

Back home, while he looked for nice clothes to wear, because that was what people did on dates, his mother popped into his room.

“Getting ready for your date?” she asked, grinning.

“Yep.”

“Don’t drink too much soda,” his mother said, although her tone was light. “So, I talked to Hana earlier today and she told me that you and Kai are fighting. Is everything all right?”

Sehun turned away from the wardrobe and faced his mother with a bewildered look. “We’re not fighting. Why would she say that?”

His mother plumped on the edge of his bed. “Kai has been grouchy for the past two days, she said. And if he, the nicest boy I’ve ever met, is grouchy, then there’s only one reason behind it.”

“Am I not the nicest boy you’ve met, Mom?” He pouted sadly.

“Aside from you.” She chuckled. “So, you’re sure Kai isn’t upset because of you?”

Sehun wasn’t sure anymore. Kai did storm off after Sehun had told him about his date with Kiena. But why would that make anyone upset?

Then it hit him. Kai was _jealous_.

Of Sehun.

Because Kai wasn’t the one going on a date with the prettiest girl in the grade!

Oh, that annoying little jerk!

Sehun took some pride in it.

But Kai should have told him that he had a crush on Kiena. (But then again, who didn’t). Sehun never would have made a move on Kiena if he had known.

“Maybe you should go see him later,” his mother suggested and rose to her full height before she walked over to Sehun and pressed a kiss to his head. “Have fun tonight.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

Later once he had bathed and dressed, he walked into the living room to find his father browsing through the sport channels. He glanced back at Sehun and asked, “Where are you off to?”

“He has a date with a cute girl from school. It’s adorable,” his mother answered from the kitchen. His father cocked a brow.

“That so?” He then smiled before turning back to the TV. “I’m proud. Happy with whatever that keeps you away from _that_ boy.”

Sehun wanted to ask what _boy_ his father was talking about. But he was running late. He did not want to have Kiena waiting for him.

She was waiting for him by the time he had biked over to _Carlos’ Diner_. But she did not seem upset as Sehun walked up to the booth.

“Hey, Sehun,” she said. She had let her strawberry blonde hair down and had a purple butterfly pin in it. Sehun found it cute.

“Hey, Kiena,” he said nervously but managed a smile. He needed to talk to her about something. “How did you… get here?”

“My mother’s over there,” she said, pointing to the counter where a woman with the same strawberry blonde hair waved at Sehun.

“Oh.” Sehun waved back. “That’s nice.”

“Yeah.”

Silence.

“Can I have your order?” came a voice that sounded fairly familiar. Sehun looked over to Sebastián, who had showed up at the booth with a small notepad in his hand. He shoved his spectacles up his nose.

“Oh. Hi, Baz,” Sehun said. “Where’s Carlos?”

“Dad’s sick today. So, he wanted me to take over,” Sebastián said. He never said so much to Sehun before. He looked shy, nervous, and jittery. “What do you want to eat?”

“You’re a waiter now?”

“No. Not yet. I’m in training.”

Sehun stared at the olive-skinned boy for a moment. “Okay…” He turned to Kiena. “What do you want to eat?”

“I’ll have chili cheese fries and apple juice,” she placed her order confidently.

Sehun ordered a cheeseburger and some cola.

“Cheese is the most delicious thing ever,” Kiena said, as though to make conversation. Which Sehun was grateful for.

“Yes,” he said curtly and unfortunately, ended the conversation there. He bit his lip. “Chocolate, too,” he then said.

Kiena smiled. “Totally.”

Sehun wanted to focus on her and the date. But all that he could think about was Kai. Sure, Sehun liked having his wins against Kai. And he didn’t have a lot of wins against Kai.

Kai ran faster than him. Both in his human and his wolf.

Kai was more well-read than him.

Kai got way better grades than him.

Kai was rich.

Kai was likeable. He was liked by all.

Kai was the nicest, according to Sehun’s mother.

Kai had his own TV. His own computer. His own everything.

Kai was kind.

Kai didn’t lie unnecessarily.

Kai was a good son.

Kai stuck to most of the rules.

Kai was not boring.

Kai was funny at times.

Kai knew a lot of general knowledge.

Kai was brave.

Kai was popular.

Kai got great Christmas presents.

Kai had wonderful siblings, who loved him more than anything.

Kai had Geun and Hana.

Kai was an Alpha.

Kai was a _wolf_ , for god’s sake.

And what did Sehun have?

Sehun had one shoe.

So, it was only natural for him to feel inadequate. He often felt, even though he’d never admit it, that he did not deserve to be Kai’s friend. Like Kai was only doing him a favour by being his friend. Kai was _amazing._ Sehun was useless.

That was what male Omegas were. Useless.

It was why Sehun liked having his wins against Kai sometimes. To feel like he was deserving enough to be Kai’s equal.

So that Kai would always see him as an equal and not just an Aequus Omega.

“What’s wrong?” Kiena asked after noticing Sehun’s moue.

He shook his head. “Do you know Kai?”

“Your friend?”

Sehun nodded.

“Of course, I know Kai,” she chuckled. “Everyone knows Kai.”

 _Of course_. Sehun groaned. “What do you… think of him?”

She blinked cluelessly. “Why are we talking about Kai?”

“If he liked you, would you like him?”

That unnerved her. She grimaced. “No? I’m on a date with _you_. I like _you_.”

That was the greatest relief ever. Sehun smiled. “Okay.”

* * *

The date was a success and Sehun could not wait to tell Sara, Taeyong, Yixing, Chanri, Jaehyun, Jeni, _and_ Kai all about it. When he biked home that night after the date, he stopped at the Regnandi house. He had noticed the foreign car, which he had never seen in the neighbourhood before, when he had left for _Carlos’ Diner_ earlier, too.

Darkness had befallen the town. All the lights in the house was on. Sehun dismounted his bike and picked up the mix of scents he had no recollection of smelling before.

More wolves.

He walked up to the porch. He did not have to ring the doorbell, which he now could reach, as the door was open and Yixing, from the hallway, beckoned Sehun inside with a wave of his hand.

Sehun entered. He could hear chatters and laughter coming from upstairs and the dining room.

“Hey!” Yixing said. Sehun looked up at him with a frown.

“Who’s here?” he inquired.

“Oh. Some of Dad’s friends,” Yixing said. “All Betas and one Omega, so don’t worry. You don’t have to go all crazy.”

Sehun scowled. “I don’t go all crazy around Alphas.”

Yixing scoffed. “Yes, you do. But that’s what all Omegas do, so don’t be ashamed.” He brought a hand to rub Sehun’s head. Sehun closed his eyes and whimpered softly at the Alpha’s touch.

“Are they just visiting?” Sehun asked when Yixing withdrew his hand.

“Yeah.”

“Are they all Regnandis?”

“Yeah.”

“Is that why you weren’t at school today?”

“Yeah.”

“Were they here two days ago?”

“No. Why?”

“Kai wasn’t at school for three days. Yesterday you and Chanri said that you didn’t know why he wasn’t there.”

Yixing shrugged. “We still don’t. We think he’s having mood swings. It happens as you start to mature.”

Sehun looked staggered. “He’s… maturing?”

“Not yet. But he’s getting there. He’s upstairs if you want to go see him.”

“He _is_?!” Sehun was already running up the staircase. He stopped, however, at the top of the stairs when he heard Kai’s voice coming from his bedroom.

“And this is my _Superman_ comics collection,” Kai said. He had shown Sehun that collection a million times. Every single time, Sehun told him that he had no interest in ‘these stupid comic books’.

“Wow!” another voice cooed with excitement. A boy. Sehun did not recognize the voice. “It’s so cool!”

“Really?! You think so?”

“I love _Superman_! You have the oldest issues!”

Sehun’s heart was doing something that made his stomach hurt. He edged closer to the room.

Kai was perched on his bed and there was a stupid little boy next to him with stupid big eyes and stupid red hair and stupid cute freckles and stupid nice clothes. He looked younger. He was probably ten or eleven.

Kai was rummaging through his box where he stashed all of his comic books. He was so distracted by the stupid boy that he had not noticed Sehun’s scent or presence.

_What the hell…_

The other boy, on the other hand, looked up at Sehun and blinked.

“Kai?” he called in the sweetest voice. “There’s an Omega staring at us.”

Sehun wanted to fight him!

Kai raised his head with a jolt, nose twitching. His eyes blew up with shock.

“Sehun?”

Sehun crossed his arms over his chest and walked in. “Who’s this?” he demanded.

Kai glanced at the boy. “This is Noah. He’s… my father’s friend’s son. We’ve known each other since we were practically born.” He smiled at the boy. The boy smiled back.

Sehun clenched his teeth. Noah looked up at him and scowled lightly.

“Well, can I talk to you? Alone? Without this kid here?” Sehun shot at Kai.

Kai cleared his throat. “He’s not a kid. He’s our age.”

“What?” Sehun glanced at Noah again. “He’s… tiny.”

“He’s a Regnandi Omega. They’re all tiny. I mean, dainty.”

“An Omega?” Sehun echoed. Then smirked. “So, you’re useless.”

“Sehun!” Kai rasped.

Noah rose from the bed. “I’m not!” he yelled at Sehun.

“Yes, you are! All male Omegas are!”

“I’m a shifter! I’m a Regnandi!”

That silenced Sehun.

“Noah, can you give us a minute?” Kai said, rubbing the back of his neck. Noah continued to glare at Sehun, but he did leave the room, obeying the Alpha-to-be.

Once they were alone, Kai faced Sehun with a furious scowl.

“What do you want?” he asked.

“Why are you letting that obnoxious little jerk on your bed?”

“It’s _my_ bed. What’s your problem?” Kai spat. “I bet you let Kiena on _your_ bed.”

Sehun made a face. “What?”

Kai turned his hardened face away. “Just go.”

“I will,” Sehun said angrily. “I just came to tell you that my date with Kiena went great!”

When Kai looked at him again, his eyes flashed red. “Well, I’m happy for you!”

Sehun knew he wasn’t because he wanted Kiena for himself. “Fine!”

“Fine!”

Turning on his heel, Sehun stomped back downstairs and pinned Noah with a hard look when he found the short boy at the bottom.

He also found Yixing and Chanri popping peanuts into their mouths, gaping at him.

“What?” Sehun groaned.

“What was _that_ all about?” Chanri gasped.

Noah was running back upstairs.

“I don’t like him,” Sehun told Chanri and Yixing once Noah was out of earshot. Not that he cared if the tiny bitch heard him.

 _Bitch_. A word he had heard Chanri and Yixing use _many_ times.

“Why? Noah’s a sweetheart,” Chanri said.

Sehun wanted to hurt her. But he frowned instead. “Does Kai think the same about him?”

“Probably?” Yixing said, smirking at his sister.

Sehun had come here to make Kai feel inadequate. But he went home that night, feeling more inadequate than ever.

* * *

Kai did talk to him, however, the next day. He showed up at Sehun’s locker at school with a pack of Sehun’s favourite gummy bears and a sad pout on his lips.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, holding the candies out.

Sehun wanted to stay mad at him for longer. But he sighed and grabbed the gummy bears instead. “You little shit.”

* * *

As it turned out, Sehun and Kiena lasted shorter than Sara and Tom.

Sehun told Kiena that he did not want her to get between him and Kai since Kai had a thing for her, too. She said it was understandable and she even looked a flattered.

When spring came again, Kai and Sehun ran around the neighbourhood every evening since Sehun was no longer invited to run with the wolves in the forest because it was dangerous.

Sometimes, Kai ran without a shirt.

As they neared fifteen, Sehun began to look at Kai in a different light. One that embarrassed him to even think about.

Spring meant new beginnings. While something new was storming in Sehun’s heart and, oddly enough, in his nether parts, Chanri got into her first relationship.

Since that happened, Sehun went over to the Regnandis’ less frequently.

Geun disapproved of her relationship. It was with a human. A car mechanic from the town.

“He had no right to tell her whom she should and shouldn’t love,” Kai said one day with frustration as they paused on their run so that Sehun could catch his breath. They sat down on the sidewalk.

“Tell me again why your father doesn’t like her boyfriend,” Sehun said.

Kai frowned, hanging his head a little. Sehun let his eyes wander for a bit. Kai’s lean muscles and abs and biceps were bathed in sweat. And his face… God, he was becoming handsome by the day. It was a mystery how Kai never could find a girlfriend.

“No one in my family does,” Kai said. “He’s human.”

“So?”

Kai looked at Sehun. “You get with someone outside the pack, you get kicked out of the pack. You basically become a Rexit.”

Sehun’s stomach churned. He recalled his parents telling him something like that. “That’s not… fair.”

“Yeah. Tell me about it.” Kai scowled. Kai didn’t look angry often. But when he did, he looked so attractive. Sehun hated for thinking that.

“So, what is she going to do?”

“You know Chanri. She’s not going to just bow her head to all these stupid rules.”

“Maybe she’ll break up with him.”

“My father’s counting on that. Or you know, he’ll just make it happen.”

“What? How?”

Kai met Sehun’s eyes and smirked miserably then. He scoffed. “You think you know my dad. You don’t, Sehun.” He rose from the pavement and ran a hand through his sweaty hair. “He’s nice. He’s wonderful. But there’s a reason why every other Regnandi fear him.”

Sehun feared Geun, too. But he didn’t think Geun could do anything too bad. “What do you think he’ll do if Chanri doesn’t let this guy go?”

Kai’s lips pressed into a thin line as his eyes turned sad. “I don’t even want to know.” He sighed. “He might just let her have him, but she’d have to take a Regnandi husband. Or wife. Whatever she’s into.”

Sehun stood up. “So, she can have her boyfriend, but she can’t… _be_ with him?”

“It would all just have to be a secret.” Kai rubbed his forehead. “It’s stupid.”

“Yes, it is.” Sehun loured.

“You think being a Regnandi is great,” he snorted. “You have no idea what’s the responsibilities that come with the name and the pack are like.”

With that, he broke into a jog again.

* * *

Sehun hated that he was thinking about Kai too much for his own good. Especially when he was in the treehouse, in his nest. It was a good thing the Regnandis never came to his house. Or else, Kai would have definitely insisted that Sehun showed him what was in the treehouse.

He slept in his nest at least three nights a week. And every one of those nights, he’d wonder what Kai was doing in that very moment.

He needed to get those thoughts out of his head.

A new girl transferred to his school the next month. Clary. She became friends with Sara, and Sara introduced her to Sehun. Sehun thought she smelled nice for a human. So, he said yes when she asked if they should go see a movie together.

Kai had reacted to the news better than the last time Sehun said he was going on a date. But he hadn’t looked stoked for Sehun. In fact, he didn’t talk to Sehun for two days. But Sehun assumed it was because Kai wanted to give him his space.

Clary was funny and sweet. Sehun liked her. She laughed at all of his jokes and was not condescending. He invited over to his house one day and introduced her to his mother. His father was happy to hear that Sehun was seeing someone when his mother told him about it at dinner.

He said, “This is better than hanging out with Geun’s kid, Sehun. Trust me.”

Sehun didn’t know what his father had against Kai, but as the years went by, Kai became less and less appealing to the man. In fact, if Kai weren’t an Alpha, Sehun was sure his father would have told him to stop being friends with Sehun.

Which was insane because all parents wanted their kids to be friends with Kai.

Sehun saw Kai at school more than at his house now. Kai told him that he probably shouldn’t come by so often for the time being because tensions were running high at his home because of Chanri.

Sehun wanted to see Chanri and tell her that it was all going to be fine.

Yixing graduated that summer. Jaehyun replaced his spot at the table in the cafeteria. Taeyong was not too happy about that.

And Jeni was growing up fast, too.

“You and Kai are best friends?” Clary asked Sehun one day.

“Sort of,” Sehun answered. “He has the best family.”

“That’s nice.”

“They’re sort of my family, too.”

“Oh.”

“You should meet them.”

“I’d love to!”

Sehun went over to the Regnandis’ that evening to ask if he could bring Clary over one day for lunch. Of course, they’d say yes. They’d be thrilled to meet Sehun’s girlfriend.

He picked up the scent all too fast before he even entered the house.

Noah.

“Sehun, what are you doing here?” Hana asked when she got the door. “It’s really late.”

“I was wondering if I can bring Clary over one of these days to meet you guys,” he blurted out.

Hana smiled but the smile looked strained. “Sure, darling.”

Sehun rarely saw Geun these days. And when he did, Geun would smile the same way Hana just did.

“Can I… see Kai?” he then asked.

“He’s upstairs with a friend, who’s visiting.”

Sehun knew who that friend was. “That’s okay then. I’ll see him at school tomorrow.” He bade Hana good night and went home.

 

He did see Kai at school the next day. He waited for Kai at his locker.

“Sehun?” Kai said, cocking an eyebrow. “Where’s Clary?”

It was a fair question since Clary was always with Sehun ever since they started going out.

“I don’t know. Where’s Noah?” Sehun asked, noting the sarcasm in his tone.

Kai heaved a sigh. “All right. What do you want to know?”

“Why is he visiting?”

Kai did not answer. He just stared at Sehun with his narrowed eyes.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Sehun then asked. No answer either. “You have a problem with Clary? Are you into her, too?”

Kai sighed again. “You’re an idiot,” he muttered.

“What?”

“I’m not into her. In fact, I’m not into any girls. In _fact_ , Noah asked me out and I said yes.”

Blood drummed in his ears and deafened them for a moment. His head felt as though a nerve had exploded in it. It was the greatest shock.

“What?” he spat.

Kai shrugged, smiling weakly. “He was so adorable when he did it. And he’s cute. I figured why not.”

“He’s a boy,” Sehun said.

That made Kai scowl. “So?”

Sehun didn’t have an argument. That was a stupid thing to say in the first place. He did not mean to insinuate that Kai _shouldn’t_ be dating boys. He was just shocked because he didn’t know that Kai even liked boys…

_Oh, shit…_

He stood there quietly, stunned and staggered, as the revelations dawned on him.

“Do you kiss him?” Sehun blurted out.

“Huh?” Kai looked confused.

“He’s your boyfriend?”

“Well, technically… But—”

“Does he make you happy?”

Kai stared at him. “Yes. He’s very nice.”

“Okay. Good. Then fine.” Sehun patted on Kai’s chest. “Do what you want. I got Biology I need to get to.”

“Sehun,” Kai called, but Sehun did not stop as he stomped away with an alien feeling gnawing at his guts.

* * *

“Kai broke up with him.” Sehun learned that piece of information from Geun a week later.

Sehun was sitting on the porch steps when Geun decided to join him. He said they hadn’t talked in a while and that they should now. Sehun had come looking for Kai to tell him that he was thinking about breaking up with Clary. Not that he and Clary ever had established a relationship. They hadn’t kissed even once.

Kai won in Sehun’s quest to be kissed first. That little twat probably couldn’t have kept his grubby little hands off of Kai. Noah would have definitely kissed Kai.

“Why?” Sehun asked.

Geun shrugged. Then he chuckled. “They’re kids. What are they going to do being in a relationship right now?”

He had a point. Sehun only wanted a girlfriend so that he could be kissed.

“Is he… sad?” Sehun asked.

“A little, I think,” Geun sighed. “But it was his call. And he knew it never would have lasted, anyway. He did not want to give Noah the hope.”

“Noah is a Regnandi Omega. And Kai… Well, Kai likes boys,” Sehun said carefully. “They could be together, can’t they? Not like Chanri and her human boyfriend.”

Geun’s eyes bored into Sehun’s for a length. “That’s true. But there’s more than just that.”

“Like what?”

The man took a big breath. “Sehun, I’m going to tell you some serious things. I need you to try to soak this in as much as you can.”

Was this another ‘big talk’?

Sehun straightened up. “Yes, sir.”

“Have you noticed anything about the way Kai… acts around you?” Geun asked.

Sehun lowered his gaze. He nodded slowly.

Geun exhaled heavily. “Then you must already have an idea of why that is. You’ve been with us for years.”

Sehun kept mum because he could tell where Geun was getting at and he did not like one piece of it.

“He’s loved you since he learned what love was,” Geun said.

Sehun felt his heart shatter. He closed his eyes. He stayed quiet.

“You’re both very young. Let me tell you that things will not be the same for you when you’re older. So, take advantage of your youth and these loop holes. Make each other happy if he’s what you want, too. I knew Hana was the one I wanted since I was nine. She took a while, but she soon realized that she wanted me, too. You’re an Aequus. And an Omega. But that doesn’t mean you won’t know who your soul wants.”

When Sehun opened his eyes, a tear trickled down his cheek. “I’m an Aequus and an Omega,” he repeated Geun’s words. “You are all Regnandis. Why would Kai even…”

“He knows the consequences of his choice. And when he’s older, he’ll have to take responsibility for it,” Geun said. “I can only pray that you two will have the strength and heart to weather it. If it were up to me, he’d be free to choose his life. But at the end of the day, it’s up to him to decide whether he wants the pack or you.”

Geun rose back to his feet and ruffled Sehun’s hair.

“He’s moping somewhere in the woods,” the man said before he wandered inside.

Sehun wiped his cheeks and stared at the trees near the house. He stood up from the porch steps and started for the woods.

The track was well-worn. He knew Kai would have gone this way. This was the path the wolves ran on.

He found Kai eventually after meandering for almost ten minutes. Kai was leaning against a tree, arms loosely wrapped around his legs. He yanked the hood of his hoodie down and looked at Sehun expressionlessly.

“I broke up with Noah,” he said quietly.

Sehun bowed his head. “I know.” With a sigh, he walked over to Kai. He looked up at a branch. The tree reminded him of the tree his treehouse was built on. And all the times he had climbed the tree to sit on the branches.

“He cried,” Kai said as Sehun started climbing the tree.

“He sounds like a wimp,” Sehun remarked.

“Don’t say that,” mewled Kai. “I feel sorry. I shouldn’t have given him hopes.”

“Why did you break up with him? I thought you liked him.”

Kai did not answer that question. He looked up at Sehun, who perched on the branch before he turned his back to Kai and sat facing the other way.

“Did you kiss him?” Sehun asked.

Kai scoffed. “Why do you keep asking that?”

“Answer me, then.”

After a moment, Kai said, “No.”

“Have you kissed anyone?”

“Sehun, I don’t want to talk about this or listen to you telling your kissing stories with Clary right now,” Kai growled. “Or ever.”

“Just answer the question.”

Kai huffed. “No. Okay? I’ve never kissed anyone. Go ahead now. Brag all you want about your petite girlfriend.”

Sehun released the branch and leaned backward, his legs locked securely around the tree branch. Kai shifted in his seat and stared at Sehun swinging from the branch upside down.

“Good,” Sehun said. He grabbed Kai’s face with both hands and pulled it close.

Kai froze, as though his whole world had shattered, when Sehun kissed him, hanging upside down from the tree.

His lips were unmoving against Sehun’s.

Sehun didn’t know much about what he was doing either.

The kiss lasted mere seconds before Sehun pulled back to see Kai’s clenched eyes. He let go of Kai’s face and sat back up on the branch before jumping back to the ground.

Kai scrambled up to feet, face as red as a beetroot.

“Kai,” Sehun began to say.

“We… shouldn’t,” Kai let out. He said nothing more as he turned around and hurried back to his house.

Sehun stood amid the trees, embarrassed and confused, hands trembling and heart thundering.


	9. Chapter 9

“Sehun!”

His mother hollered from below. Sehun did not feel like answering. He wanted to rot away in this treehouse, in his nest forever. He pulled the blankets tighter around him and hid his face into one of the twenty cushions he had stuffed into the treehouse.

He was crestfallen. Embarrassed. And heartbroken. He was so mortified that he did not want to ever face Kai again.

Kai was right. They shouldn’t and Sehun shouldn’t _have_. What had he been thinking?! That’s right, he wasn’t. He shouldn’t have let Geun get into his head. He shouldn’t have let _Kai_ get into his head.

His first kiss. Kai’s first kiss. _Their_ first kiss. What should have been something sweet and memorable had turned out so horrifyingly humiliating. What was Sehun expecting? For Kai to swoon and kiss him back? Not only had Sehun embarrassed himself. He had also ruined their friendship.

Sure, Geun might have been right about Kai being in love with him. But Kai had never acted upon his feelings in all those years he’d known Sehun, had he? Maybe he didn’t want to. Maybe he never would. But there Sehun was, acting on Kai’s feelings _for_ him. It was wrong, and it was pathetic.

Oh, what Sehun would give to turn back time and undo that kiss.

Maybe Kai liked Noah more than Sehun after all.

He shook the foolish thoughts away and crawled further under the blanket.

“Sehun, either you come down here right this instant or I climb up there and haul your butt down!” his mother shrieked. “Your father wants to speak with you.”

Sehun sat up. As much as he never wanted to go out into the world again, he did not want to upset his father. So, he made his way back into the house.

He found his father on the couch. The TV was turned off. The man was staring idly at the coffee table.

“Dad,” Sehun muttered as he sank in another couch. “You wanted to talk to me?”

Huffing out a heavy breath through his nose, his father looked up at him. “How are things between you and that Clary girl?”

Sehun chewed on his lip. Then sighing, he said, “Actually, I broke with her yesterday.”

The day after he had kissed Kai.

His father did not look surprised. “Why?” he asked, nonetheless. “I thought you liked her. She was a very nice girl.”

A part of Sehun wanted to tell him the truth. But he wasn’t sure what the _truth_ was himself.

When he did not reply, his dad said, “Is there someone else?”

“Honey, he’s fifteen,” said his mother from where she stood near the wall. “None of us expected him to last long with her, anyway.”

“You know that’s not what this is about,” his father grumbled. He sounded disgruntled about something. He faced Sehun again. “I know you’re a male Omega. But it doesn’t mean you have to bend for an Alpha. Do you understand?”

“We shouldn’t be talking to him about this yet,” his mother started to interfere.

“Yes, we should,” his father argued. “He’s going to think it’s all right. He’s going to build this fantasyland where all would work out fine. But trust me, it won’t. He will crash and burn while the Regnandis will keep marching on with their heads held high. The pack comes before anything to them. Chanri is acting out but soon she too will realize that risking the abandonment of her pack is not worth the walking hormone she’s dating.”

“That’s none of our business.”

“Well, my son _is_ my business.” His face turned taut with seriousness. “Sehun, do you like that boy?”

_Oh, God…_

Sehun remained still and quiet, unable to find his voice. This could not be happening… It was another ‘big talk’, and Sehun wasn’t sure he was ready to have it.

“Sehun, answer me.”

He shook his head. It felt like a lie, but he was definitely not going to say yes to that question.

“You’re lying,” his father accused. “He’s an Alpha. If he’s looking at you like a lovelorn pup, you’re not going to be able to look away. But apart from all that, you’d know it yourself. Maybe you are still too young for that. But tell me. How do you feel about that boy?”

Sehun thought about this for a minute. When they were young, Kai had been unbearable. But even then, Sehun had gone back to him, unconsciously, time and again. Now, even the thought of their friendship being broken hurt him. His head was always so full of Kai. And as much as he tried to ignore it, there was an unreachable itch inside him that wanted to see Kai all the damn time.

“I don’t feel… anything,” he mumbled.

His father’s eyes narrowed. “Now, listen. If he ever tries to browbeat you or bully you into… doing whatever he wants you to do, I need you to tell me immediately.”

“Kai is a good boy,” Sehun’s mother spat. “He’s never going to do anything like that.”

Her husband ignored her. “A Regnandi will use you. They think they could own anything they want. We’re all beneath them. Kai will use you, too. But I’m going to tell you that he will never put you before his pack. I believe the boy has good in his heart. But he also has responsibilities. You have an option to stay away from him, Sehun. You wouldn’t have understood any of this if I had told you when you were younger. But you’re old enough to understand now. From here, it will only get harder. So, I suggest, no matter what that boy tries, you have to resist.”

There was nothing that Sehun could say to assure his father that Kai was not trying anything.

“What do you mean?” he said instead.

His father sucked in another deep breath. “If his sister binds her soul to a human, it only affects her. But if Kai binds his soul to you, it affects you, too. You’d want to bind your soul to him and make him your Soulbinder. But here’s the thing, Sehun. Soul-binding does not guarantee you happiness. Even after binding his soul to yours, he could take other mates. He’s an Alpha, he can do that. But you… You are bound to a single Alpha. And the Regnandi will never have an Aequus for a mate. Or anyone out of their own echelon.”

Sehun felt a sob scratching at his throat as tears lightly stung his eyes. “I don’t want to talk about this, Dad,” he said silently. “Kai and I… have nothing.”

“Even so, I want to warn you. So that you know what you’re doing, and you don’t blame us in the end for not looking out for you. It’s your choice. I won’t force your hand. But I’m going to lay out the truth. Because that was the plan. We wouldn’t have been able to stop Kai from getting close to you when you two were kids. But the plan was to tell you both what you’re risking here if you decide to take it to the next level. Because at the end of the day, it’s your lives, your decisions.” He stopped to look at his wife. “Your mother has something else to say to you.”

She hesitated, frowning at Sehun. Then she sat down next to her husband. “Sehun, darling,” she said, taking Sehun’s hand. “Your father’s right. You’re old enough to understand and I… We want you to be safe. So, we want you to know everything.”

“Many years ago,” his father said. “I met a man. A Regnandi. An Omega. He was married to another Regnandi but a Beta. And they had a child together.”

They must have adopted. Like how Sara was adopted. But they wouldn’t have adopted any child. It had to be a Regnandi too, right?

“I’ve heard many stories,” his mother then said with a sad smile. “My own mother used to tell me these stories. She also knew people… male Omegas who could bear children of their own. They were born… different. With both the male and female… sexual… parts.” She licked her lips and swallowed. None of her words were registering into Sehun’s head. “Some were more feminine, and they just called themselves women. Some were masculine. Some were just androgynous. They neither looked masculine nor feminine. But these wolf descendants with both traits were called hermaphrodites. When you were born… I sensed it immediately that… you were one of them. We had you checked a several times and… we’re sure you’re…” she trailed off, noticing Sehun’s teary eyes. “Sehun…”

“I’m part… woman?” were the first words that came out of his mouth. And they sounded beyond ridiculous.

“No, no!” his mother yelped. “Well… some of you is. And we can only tell how you will develop as you grow older. For now, you’re just… well…” She buried her face in her hands. “I’m so sorry.”

“It isn’t your fault,” Sehun’s father told her, wrapping an arm around her. “And it isn’t a mistake. If anything, it’s going to work well on his favour. If he can bear a child, he’s more useful than an ordinary male Omega.”

His father was smiling, but there was nothing humorous about that grin.

“Sehun, it isn’t a bad thing,” his father said. “You’re the best of both worlds. And there are many, many like you in the world of the wolves. It’s who you are, you shouldn’t be ashamed of it. But we’re telling you this now so that you can be… safe.”

Then came the real ‘big talk’ Sehun had been waiting for.

That night, Sehun did not get any sleep.

* * *

It took him a few days to get used to the news that he was part _woman_ , no matter what his mother said. It should have put him to shame. But it didn’t.

He stood in front of the bathroom mirror for more than hour, staring at his bare body. He took his penis in his hand and blinked at it. Then he brought his hands to the sides of his waist. They were getting curvy. His body no longer looked the way it had a couple of years ago. He didn’t look like a twelve-year-old scrawny boy anymore. He was not only growing tall, he was also…

He didn’t know the word for it. He had nice skin. Unlike the other boys his age in his school, unlike Taeyong, unlike Kai, Sehun was not struggling with facial or body hair just yet. He thought he was cursed. But now, he was starting to think that he was blessed.

His father had told him that he shouldn’t be ashamed of who he was and that was the greatest motivation Sehun had ever received. He was _never_ going to be ashamed of himself.

If his dad was proud of him, then nothing else mattered.

He surveyed his face next in the reflection. He had puffy lips.

What must have Kai thought have them brush against his?

Sehun gasped in a breath and shook his head. He did not want to think about that. He had nice eyelashes. They were cute like a baby’s. He had pink nipples. Really pink and pretty. He touched them. He shuddered and dropped his hands again.

His mother gave him a haircut later that afternoon. She said his hair was turning into a bird nest and even made a joke about him being single forever with a hairstyle so outdated.

Sehun did not like the haircut. His ruddy brown hair was so short now and pushed back and up, trimmed at the sides. But it made him look a little tougher. As much as he liked the way his body was turning out to be, he would still like to look like a boy.

Sara called the house phone in the evening. She asked him why he hadn’t been in school. Sehun made up an excuse, saying that he was sick. He even faked a cough over the phone. And then he learned from her that Kai hadn’t been to school either.

He hadn’t been over to the Regnandis after that ignominious incident. And for as far as he cared, Kai had not bothered to come look for him either.

There it was. Sehun had wrecked their relationship for good.

He needed some time away from the rest of the world. He needed his nest.

After dinner, he went back up to the treehouse. He turned the lamp on and curled up on his bed in a corner. He picked up his baby blanket and sniffed it. It smelled like nothing to him, but it probably smelled like him.

Like vanilla and fireworks.

He hugged the blanket and closed his eyes. Clary hadn’t been thrilled when he called her the other morning and told her that he was breaking up with her point-blank. She hung up on him without a response.

Lying down on the mattress, Sehun turned on his battery-powered radio. _How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You)_ by _Marvin Gaye_ was playing. It made Sehun’s heart go a little faster as he thought of the kiss again. It was barely a kiss and it was nothing like what he had imagined. But it had happened, and it had happened with the boy who had loved Sehun since he was only a child.

His head shot up when he heard a noise from outside. He was ready to attack and scare the incoming raccoon off. Raccoons were always climbing into his nest and stealing the snacks he had stashed in there.

But then his heart almost fell out of his chest when he caught the scent before he saw Kai clamber up the ladder and the veranda of the treehouse. He was clad in his hoodie, the hood pulled over a cap.

“Kai?” Sehun gasped almost inaudibly as he rose from the bed and gaped at the other boy with slacked jaw and bulged eyes.

Kai straightened up and slid his hands into the pockets of his hoodie as he caught his breath, gaze meeting Sehun’s before it glided over the inside of the treehouse while _Marvin Gaye_ played in the background.

Sehun knew he had to tell Kai to leave. But he didn’t. And he didn’t mind it one bit when Kai stepped into the treehouse and was now standing in his nest.

He glanced around and asked, “So, this is your hideout?”

Sehun could not bring himself to speak. Kai was here. In person. In Sehun’s nest. Tall and handsome. Clad in that deep blue hoodie over a black T-shirt and fade blue jeans.

Another boy was standing in his nest. For the first time.

Kai clenched his teeth and gulped heavily. He was holding his breath. Did he not want to smell Sehun all over him?

Then he looked at Sehun again. He scanned Sehun’s new haircut. He did not grimace. He just stared. He must have liked the new hairstyle. That made Sehun weirdly relieved.

“Kai, what are you doing here?” Sehun finally blurted out when he could speak again.

Kai curled his bottom lip between his teeth and lowered his head for a stretch.

Shaking his head, Sehun closed the distance between them. “You need to leave. You’re not supposed to be up here. You never even visited once because we’re all too dirty for your royal butt.” He brought his hands to Kai’s chest to propel him out of the treehouse. “I don’t want you in here,” Sehun grunted and tried to push the boy back.

That was when Kai caught his wrists, pulling Sehun’s hands away from his chest and leaned in, tilting his head. His lips met Sehun’s in a harsh crash. But it melted Sehun’s whole world away. It felt as though he had pulled his heart out and given it to Kai. His head spun a little.

Kai kissed him firmly, his hands wound tight around Sehun’s wrists.

He pulled back with a smack. Sehun’s lips throbbed lightly from the impact. He gawked at Kai, lips parted and chest heaving a little. Kai’s cheeks were as red as his lips. He ran his tongue over them. Sehun fought the urge to kiss them again.

“I want you to be my boyfriend,” Kai said, voice low like a wolf’s growl.

Sehun could only stare. He hadn’t even recovered from the kiss. And now he was hearing _this_? “What?” he let out after a while, pulling his wrists free. “No.” He scowled, crossing his arms over his chest.

Kai’s eyebrows dipped low. He looked both sad and disappointed. Then his eyes broadened. If Kai were a cartoon, Sehun was sure that reaction entailed a flashing lightbulb above his head.

Kai took a step forward. His nose was almost brushing Sehun’s. “WHY NOT?!” he started shouting. “WHY WON’T YOU BE MY BOYFRIEND, SEHUN?! I’M NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL—”

“Oh, my God, shut up!” Sehun gasped, clapping a hand against Kai’s mouth to muffle his yelling. “You’re going to wake my parents!”

Kai scowled. But he fell quiet. Sehun retrieved his hand. “You kissed me.”

“You said I shouldn’t have,” Sehun countered.

“Because you shouldn’t. But I don’t care anymore. If one day it comes to the pack or you, I choose you. End of story. I go wherever you go. So, let me be your boyfriend.”

He sounded the most earnest Sehun had ever heard him be. And he sounded serious. “You… want to be… my boyfriend?” Sehun stuttered out.

Kai nodded. “Since I was… I don’t know. Since forever. I’m better than Kiena. I’m better than Clary. I’ll be the best boyfriend ever if you give me the chance.”

Sehun wondered how wrong his parents were about Alphas being bullies. Because in his case, Kai was always the one following Sehun around like a puppy and begging him. Just like how he was begging Sehun now to love him back. He had even tried to scare Sehun into loving him back. He recalled the way he had made Tom love Sara back. Thinking about it now, it seemed ridiculous.

* * *

They told everyone three days later. And everyone meant, Kai’s family, Sehun’s family, Sara, and Taeyong. Kai and Sehun’s parents weren’t thrilled to hear it, but they hadn’t opposed it. Chanri and Yixing had given them a big hug and told them to stay strong for each other. Jaehyun didn’t care. Jeni asked Kai why he would go for a noob like Sehun. Sara and Taeyong said they knew it was coming.

And Sehun… Well, Sehun had a boyfriend now.

His father wasn’t talking to him. But his mother told Sehun that he’d come around eventually.

The following week, Sehun found dead squirrels and rabbits on his porch. His mother told him that Kai was courting him.

“For what? We’re already boyfriends,” Sehun said.

“Well, he didn’t get to do it before. He’s doing it now,” his mother replied.

“It’s disgusting,” Sehun said.

He scolded Kai for killing bunnies the next day. It upset Kai that his romantic gesture was not appreciated but he promised to not to do it again.

They had their third kiss in the forest a couple of days later. This time, Sehun kissed Kai.

Two weeks after becoming his boyfriend, Kai started smelling different.

It broke Sehun. It ripped his soul into pieces and every piece bulleted towards Kai.


	10. Chapter 10

The metallic stench of blood circled the air around the house in the morning. Sehun almost gagged as his stomach churned when he wandered outside to find out what was causing that godawful smell.

He was halted dead in his tracks when he found four dead rabbits and two squirrels strewn over the porch, clearly lobbed over the fence. The bitemarks around their necks suggested that they were attacked by a feral animal.

Sehun did not realize he was holding his breath until he gasped, noticing his mother on the porch, who was also staring at the rabbits and squirrels, for God knew how long.

“Mom,” he called out shakily. “What’s this?”

She turned to him with a grimace. “Um… Something the wolves did to court their mates.”

Sehun’s eyes almost popped out of his sockets. “ _Kai_ did this?”

She shrugged. “Unless you have another wolf courting you.”

Sehun did not like that word. Courting. It made him seem like a wimpy princess from the fairy-tales.

“For what? We’re already boyfriends,” Sehun said.

“Well, he didn’t get to do it before. He’s doing it now.

“It’s disgusting,” he grumbled. “Why would he do this? I thought he wanted me to like him.”

“Well, you’re supposed to like this,” his mother said.

“What? Dead bunnies? They did nothing wrong!”

“Try to appreciate it, Sehun,” she groaned. “He must have spent an entire night hunting them for you.”

“I don’t eat dead bunnies and squirrels!”

His mother rolled her eyes, huffing loudly. “You knew what you were signing up for when you hitched your wagon to a dominant Regnandi Alpha. Deal with this. Clean it up before your dad finds out.”

Sehun gasped again. “I have to clean it up?! I have school.”

“Okay, fine. I’ll help.”

Sehun wanted to murder Kai. But he clenched his teeth and picked up the carcasses with his mother before tossing them out. He took a second shower that morning before he jumped on his bike and rode over to Kai’s house.

Kai was already waiting for him on his bike on the driveway with a wide grin plastered to his face.

Ever since they became ‘boyfriends’, Kai had been accompanying Sehun everywhere. They even rode to school together now and Kai was always waiting for Sehun outside the classrooms.

As much as Sehun tried to convince himself that it was a little suffocating, he felt pampered and safe. He liked it. He liked being Kai’s boyfriend. It had also earned him a whole kind of respect at school.

The only problem was that Sehun was still having a hard time telling people that Kai was his ‘boyfriend’. Now, he had another problem.

He pulled up near Kai and pinned the boy with a scowl. Kai’s grin faltered at once.

“Good… morning?” Kai muttered nervously.

“You know you’re disgusting, right?” Sehun said. Kai scratched the back of his head.

“Not the remark I was expecting after I had showered, and put on my good shirt and that special cologne you said you liked at my birthday last year.”

Why would Kai even remember that stupid thing that Sehun couldn’t even recall saying?!

“I even combed my hair today,” Kai said.

“I’m talking about the rabbits,” Sehun growled. Kai blushed.

“Did you… like them?”

“So, you did do it.”

“Well, yeah. I found all the fat ones.” He licked his lips. “For you.”

Sehun wanted to cry for all the poor bunnies and squirrels Kai must have killed. “You listen to me. Don’t you dare do anything like that again!”

That shocked Kai. “You… didn’t like it?”

“No!”

“Why? Were they not fat enough? I can try to get a bear for you next time.”

“Oh, my God, the fatness of the animals is not the issue here! You are not allowed to kill anymore rabbits or squirrels or any animal that has done nothing to you, do you understand?!”

Kai looked sad then. “But… it’s what we do.”

“No more of it.”

“Sehun—”

“I won’t kiss that mouth that has innocent bunny blood all over it.”

Kai was convinced then. He sighed and said, “All right. I won’t hunt again. I’m sorry you didn’t like it.”

Sehun did like the gesture. He liked that Kai had made the effort to go hunting for him and that he was ‘courting’ Sehun. He liked that Kai went looking for all the fat ones. It warmed Sehun’s heart.

But what made it even warmer was that Kai was willing to let go of hunting for him. Maybe he really did mean it when he said he’d choose Sehun over his pack when the time came.

Later that day at school, Sehun rummaged through his locker, wondering where Kai was. He wasn’t waiting outside the classroom today.

“So, have you done anything naughty yet?!”

Sehun jumped, slamming his shoulder against the door of his locker as he turned to see Sara beaming at him. “Jesus Christ, you scared the living daylights out of me, Sara.”

She leaned against the lockers and said, “So, have you?”

“Have I what?”

“You know? Did the naughty deeds.” She winked, simpering smugly.

Sehun cocked a brow. “What are you talking about?”

“Ugh,” she grunted. “You and Kai! Have you done… you know… anything mischievous? Like the things your parents probably told you not to do?”

“Like eating hazelnuts? My parents said that I’m allergic to it and if I ate them I would choke.”

“No, you idiot!” she hissed. “Not hazelnuts. But Kai’s nuts. Have you eaten Kai’s nuts and choked? That’s what I want to know.”

Sehun wanted to hide in the locker and never come out again. He quickly glanced around to make sure no one was listening, and that Kai was nowhere around.

“Shut up!” he spat at Sara under his breath. His cheeks were burning. “We’re fifteen!”

“Almost sixteen. Do you know how many nuts I’ve already choked on—”

“Blah blah blah,” Sehun cried, covering his ears.

She yanked his hands back down. “I’m kidding. I’m going to wait for my husband before I do anything. But you shouldn’t. That’s the advantage of being a boy! You gotta get the uglies going, Sehun. Have you seen him? He’s getting hotter by the freaking second! If you don’t tie your man down, another perky gay is going to snatch him away.”

“I’m not a perky gay.”

“Well…” She shrugged, looking at Sehun’s butt.

“Besides, we’ve only… kissed like two times.” It embarrassed him just to say it out loud. He hoped his face wasn’t too obviously red. “He won’t even touch me unnecessarily.”

“What are _you_ waiting for? For marriage?”

“You are.”

“That’s because I’m not a supernatural creature like you. Can you imagine the number of wolves that’s going to have their butts scratching up Kai when he matures? You could barely keep your hands off Yixing when he did.”

“We’re not doing this again. I’m going to my class, Sara. If I need any advice, I’ll be sure to ring you up.” He shook his head and shoved past her.

Sara got into her head. Sehun thought about it through the rest of school that day. He always heard his classmates talk about… that thing… _sex_. He was sure none of them were doing it but the girls were always talking about how magical it would be when it happened to them one day.

And Sehun had seen it in movies, too. He just never gave it much thought. Up until he and Kai started going out, his sole goal was to kiss somebody.

Now that’s achieved, what was the next step?

Kai was waiting for him in the hallway when Sehun exited his classroom.

“Do you all your classes end earlier than mine?” Sehun asked.

“No. I just sneak out,” Kai said, looking so happy to see Sehun.

“Does Geun know of this bad habit of yours?”

Kai frowned. “It’s best that he doesn’t…”

Sehun rolled his eyes. “Should we go to the woods today?”

Kai took a moment to answer. “We can’t. My father says that there’s been an increase in Rexit activity in the territory.”

“We don’t have to wander too far. I just thought… we could, you know, get some privacy.”

Kai was mulling now.

“Please?” Sehun faked a mewl.

Sighing, Kai then said, “Okay. But not too far into the woods.”

They biked to the forest near their homes. Parking their bikes against a tree, Sehun perched on the mossy wooden bench that hadn’t been frequented for very long.

Kai took a shy seat next to him.

“You can shift if you want,” Sehun said. “I miss watching you run.”

Kai shook his head. “It’s been a little… difficult for the past few days.”

“What? Shifting?”

He nodded. “And it’s full moon tonight. I’ll shift with the others later.”

“Okay.” He watched Kai glimpse him with small, brief glances. The boy was fidgeting with his hands between his legs. They had been friends for so long. Sehun hadn’t seen him fidget like this since he was a little boy.

“Besides,” Kai then added. “I’d rather spend time with you.”

“Okay,” Sehun said again.

They said nothing for a long moment. Sehun chewed on his bottom lip, fingernails scratching at the wood as he gripped the bench’s edge. He then looked up and slid a little closer to Kai.

Kai noticed the movement but didn’t react.

Sehun’s heart was pounding as he raised a hand to Kai’s chest to grab his T-shirt. Kai turned his face to meet Sehun’s when Sehun lightly pulled at the T-shirt.

His gaze instantly dropped to Sehun’s lips. He even leaned his side slightly to the left. But he didn’t move any further. So, it was up to Sehun to close his eyes and kiss Kai.

Every one of the kisses he shared with Kai felt different. The first was confusing. The second was fire. And this was just soft.

Kai kissed each of Sehun’s lips gently, his hands obediently sitting on his lap before he raised them to cup Sehun’s face. He pulled back to gaze at Sehun’s jaded and heavy eyes. Then he leaned in again, softly kissing Sehun’s lips like he was too afraid he might hurt them.

They came apart with flushed cheeks. Both dropped their heads, looking down at the forest floor.

Sehun hoped Kai did not think it was awkward because it felt fantastic for himself.

He reached out and took Kai’s hand. They sat there for long, holding hands.

* * *

The second time they held hands was in the centre of the town. People looked at them funny. Sehun didn’t care. And neither did Kai.

Until a man with the scent of a wolf walked past them. Kai’s eyes turned red for a split second as he began to snarl at the wolf. Sehun held his hand tighter.

“Rexit?” Sehun asked once the man was out of shot.

Kai gave a strained nod.

They went home after getting lunch. Kai stayed all afternoon until dark began to fall over the horizon.

Sehun turned the lamp in the treehouse on. The radio was also on so that his parents would not hear them talk and find out that Kai was up here.

He had let Kai lie on the mattress. When it got chilly, Kai handed Sehun the hoodie he had been wearing. Sehun knew he was never going to return the hoodie. He would keep it in his nest.

But for now, he wore it as he crawled into the bed against Kai. They stared at each other for minutes with a big gap between them. When Sehun finally found the chance move closer, he took it. The heat of Kai’s body was totally something else. The way it wrapped around Sehun’s body made Sehun almost sweat.

He gave Kai a quick peck on the lips before pulling back.

“I… wanted to ask you something,” Sehun then muttered.

“What is it?”

He lifted his hand to Kai’s face to let his fingertips trail along Kai’s jaw. Kai hadn’t shaved. There was a light trace of stubble on the edges of his jaw. Touching it had Sehun’s blood spiking in his brain.

“Will we… get… married one day?” Sehun asked.

Kai sat up.

Sehun told himself that he didn’t care whatever the answer was. Well, if he didn’t care he never would have asked the question in the first place. He just wanted to prove his parents wrong.

But the way Kai just kept silent made Sehun’s heart break a little.

“We can get married right now,” Kai then blurted out, turning back to look at Sehun.

Sehun sat up, too. “What?”

“Marriage is just a few vows, right?” Kai smiled a toothy grin.

Sehun was confused. “Aren’t we… too young for marriage?”

Kai wasn’t listening. He was clambering up to his knees and taking Sehun’s hands. Sehun followed suit.

Now, kneeling before each other, Sehun stared at Kai, completely puzzled.

“Shall we get married?” Kai asked.

“Uh… Sure?”

“Okay. Do you, Sehun, take me to be your husband?”

Sehun swooned for a moment. _How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You)_ by _Marvin Gaye_ started playing on the radio.

“I don’t think it works like this,” Sehun said.

“So long we stay true to our vows, that’s what marriage is.” Kai sounded determined. “Will you always love me and always be for only me? Will you always go wherever I go?”

After three breaths, Sehun said, “I… I will… Will you?”

Kai nodded, smiling wide. “I will, Sehun.” He pulled Sehun’s face close and kissed him.

* * *

He didn’t see Kai for a whole day. It was a weekend, so maybe Geun had taken their kids somewhere. But it didn’t put Sehun’s mind at ease.

So, that evening, he walked over to the Regnandis’. He didn’t have to go up the porch because the family was already gathered outside on their driveway.

Geun looked furious. “Did you even bother to think about your family, Chanri?!” he yelled at her.

Her brothers were standing her sides. Both Yixing and Kai were shirtless, and they looked like they were ready to pounce on their father if Geun went any closer to their sister.

“I did, Dad,” Chanri said. “But I cannot ignore my own happiness, can I?!”

“Let’s talk about this inside,” Hana said worriedly.

“I cannot protect you from this. You know that,” Geun spat.

“I know,” Chanri argued, her eyes flashing golden every time she talked. “I don’t need you to. I can look after my own behind.”

Kai’s eyes fell on Sehun at last. His hard expression softened into something that looked like concern. “Sehun,” he heard Jeni say. She was crying, hugging her mother.

Geun stopped to glance over at Sehun.

Something was smelling strange. Foreign.

“Get inside,” Geun growled at Chanri. And then at the rest of them. All of them immediately followed Geun into the house except Kai.

Sehun tried to process the unfamiliar scent. It was strong. So strong that it left him lightheaded. His knees buckled as blood swam ferociously behind his eyes. It wasn’t just the scent. There was something else in the air that was burning against Sehun’s skin. He felt sick.

“Sehun,” Kai gasped as he lurched forward and caught Sehun before he could drop to the ground.

It was Kai. Kai was the one with the foreign scent.

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Sehun wheezed loudly and threw his arms around Kai’s neck. It was killing him. He thought this was what death must feel like. He thought his soul was about to leave his body. Maybe it was.

He pressed his face to Kai’s collarbones and sniffed him. Then he moved higher and whimpered aggressively before opening his mouth and sinking his teeth into Kai’s shoulder. Kai hissed but he did not stop Sehun.

Then Sehun kissed the faint bitemark. It was not deep enough to scar. He kissed up Kai’s neck, jaw, cheek and then finally all over Kai’s mouth.

“I’m going to die!” he screamed, tears falling down his eyes. “I think I’m going to hell!”

Kai chuckled between the kisses Sehun was placing on his mouth, his hands latched onto Sehun’s waist before they drooped low to grip around Sehun’s thighs. “Then I’ll go with you.” He hoisted Sehun up and Sehun immediately locked his legs around Kai’s waist, still kissing and gently nipping at Kai’s cheeks and mouth, his fingers tightly clenched around Kai’s hair.


	11. Chapter 11

A few weeks before he turned sixteen, he got his first job at the local bakery. His father had put in a good word for him with the owner of the bakery, Mrs. Bianchi. She seemed like a nice woman, a little plump on the behind, and she was an Aequus female Omega. She was happy for an assistant in her bakery and she said that she was glad it was another Aequus Omega.

“Your father and I go way back,” she said one day while she showed Sehun where to store the yeasts in the pantry. As exciting as it was for him to learn new things and be out in the world for once, the bakery was usually deserted. However, whenever there was a customer, he was beyond excited to attend them. The other day, Mrs. Passwater, his English Literature teacher showed up. She said it was a nice surprise to see him there.

Sometimes, Yixing, Jaehyun, and Jeni popped in, too. They’d buy all sorts of bread and baked goods. Sehun wasn’t sure if they bought them to eat them or to make him feel good about working there and help him earn a spot in Mrs. Bianchi’s good books. When he had asked Kai about it, the latter said he didn’t know.

He worked four days a week after school until the bakery closed.

“He told me you were friends,” Sehun said. He never thought he’d get used to the smell of freshly baked breads, but he had.

“Yep.” She brushed a ringlet of hair out of her face. “We knew each other in high school. He was one of the handsomest man in school.”

“Was he?” Sehun believed that. His father was still pretty handsome for a man his age.

“Your mother couldn’t keep her hands off him ever since they started going out,” she scoffed. Sehun blinked, wondering if Mrs. Bianchi had a thing for his dad. He’d rather not ask.

The bakery bell chimed as the door opened.

“Oh. Go take care of the customer,” Mrs. Bianchi ordered.

Sehun was back at the counter, only to find Yixing and Jeni looming over the cupcake stand. “You guys again?” he sighed.

“Is that any way to talk to your customers?” Jeni asked, crossing her arms over her chest. She was only ten, but she was so tall that she actually looked like a teenager.

“You’ve got pistachio cupcake today,” Yixing said.

“Shouldn’t you be at some college instead of buying cupcakes?” Sehun asked.

“I’m still waiting for their reply,” he said with a pout.

“For a year?” Sehun arched an eyebrow.

“That’s on my account. I don’t think it’s wise for me to leave my pack and go anywhere at the moment.”

“Because of Chanri?” Jeni said, and his brother pinned her with a stare. “Oh, right. Sorry. Well, I’ll have two chocolate cupcakes.”

Sehun boxed up two chocolate and two pistachio cupcakes. He hadn’t seen Chanri a lot lately. Even when he went over for dinners at the Regnandis, she was often absent. And when she was there, she barely said three words to Sehun. Or to anyone else. Geun and Hana looked increasingly stressed out. Sehun saw so much blue and red in the house now.

Sehun fell further and further apart from the family. Even though he grew closer to Kai every day. And if Yixing went to college soon, Sehun didn’t know how much of him he’d see anymore. Jaehyun was doing his own thing now. He had his own group of friends. Jeni was still very young. And Chanri was never there. Geun and Hana spoke less and less to Sehun and his family. As much as he appreciated Kai always being there for him, Kai wasn’t enough. Sehun wanted the whole family.

“Are you all right?” Yixing asked, noticing Sehun’s long face.

“Yeah.” He handed them the box of cupcakes. “Is… everything okay with Chanri?”

Yixing licked his lips. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t worry about it.” He forced a smile. “Thanks.”

Sehun didn’t know when he had gotten over Yixing’s scent. It no longer bothered him anymore. Neither did Geun, Hana and Chanri’s scents. Maybe it was after he had started to focus all of his attention to only Kai’s scent.

Kai was waiting for him outside the bakery at eight o’clock sharp. Only a few months after he had attained full maturity as an Alpha, his face took a firmer shape, his jaw square, skin bronzer than ever, his lithe body sinuous but packed with lean muscles. And the way his skin smelled never failed to drive Sehun insane. At school, everyone looked at Kai like he was a walking piece of delicious, juicy meat. Then they looked at Sehun who was always at Kai’s side with confusion. Sehun’s body was doing the opposite of what Kai’s body was doing to Kai. Instead of turning hard and boyish, his body was becoming suppler and softer by the day. Sehun had no complaints and neither did Kai, who always held him like Sehun was the most fragile thing in existence.

Sehun walked over to him at once and brought a hand to the back of Kai’s head to run his fingers through his short hair. “Hey, boyfriend,” he whispered and leaned in for a quick kiss.

Kai’s kisses were the best. “Hey, beautiful,” Kai mumbled against Sehun’s mouth, smiling.

They biked to Sehun’s house and climbed up the treehouse like they always did in the evenings. Snuggling in Sehun’s nest, Kai pulled Sehun close.

This was a must. Sehun had never told Kai that he needed this like he needed air, but Kai had figured it out himself. Sehun needed his nest to smell like them. Both. He would go all jittery and anxious if Kai didn’t lay in it with him even for a day.

“You want to run with us tomorrow morning?” Kai asked after a while, fingers playing with Sehun’s hair.

“What?” It had been forever since Sehun had run with the wolves. He wanted it. So bad. “The whole family?”

“Well, most of us. Chanri and my mom won’t be there.”

Sehun nodded. “Of course. I’d love to.”

They lay in silence for a moment. Sehun’s heart was racing. He wanted to bring his hands to Kai’s chest. To slip them under Kai’s shirt and feel his bare skin. But he could never bring himself to make such a daunting move. As much as he wanted to bathe himself in Kai’s scent and heat, he didn’t know where to start.

* * *

He did run with the wolves the next morning. He had never felt so alive. He was significantly slower than the wolves, but they slowed down for him.

Geun led the pack as usual. The black, majestic wolf that kept every one of his pup in line. At his side was Yixing. Always. Another black wolf, slightly smaller than Geun. And bigger than Yixing was the white wolf with the red eyes that Sehun could pick out in any crowd. Its fur as pure as snow. Behind them were the two brown wolves. The bigger one with the purple eyes was Jaehyun. He continued to snarl at Jeni every time she’d trip over her own paws.

When Sehun finally needed to catch his breath, he sat on the ground of the forest and leaned back against a tree. The smaller brown wolf made its way over to him. She nudged her nose against Sehun’s cheek and licked it. Sehun giggled. But the laughter quickly died when he heard the fierce growl that retreated Jeni at once with a soft whimper.

The snarling white wolf barked once at the brown wolf that was licking Sehun’s face before it crawled over to Sehun and dragged its tongue over his cheek where the brown pup had licked.

“You don’t have to be so possessive,” Sehun grumbled, taking the wolf’s face in his hands to scratch its neck. Kai liked it. He whined softly in agreement. A black wolf came next. Yixing sniffed Sehun. Kai did not like _that_. He started growling again. Sehun heard his angry calling shot towards his older brother. _Love. Mate. Mine. Fuck off._ The white wolf then vaulted off the ground before pouncing on its brother. It broke into a brawl.

It took Geun’s mighty growl to axe the fight.

Sehun decided that perhaps it was not the best idea to go running with the whole pack again.

* * *

“Okay. Sit down,” Sara ordered when Sehun entered her bedroom.

He glanced at Taeyong, who was already settled on the bed with his legs folded. He was wearing a serious expression and so was Sara.

“What is this about?” Sehun inquired, taking a seat at the desk’s chair. “You called and told me to come over immediately.”

“Yes,” Sara said. “We could never get a hold of you at school anymore. You’re always running behind Kai and when you’re not, Kai is always running behind you.”

“That’s because we’re… boyfriends,” Sehun muttered.

“We know,” Taeyong said. “Which is why we’re having this talk.”

Sehun was curious. And a little scared. Was this another ‘big talk’ that would change his life forever?

“We printed out some webpages that we think will be useful for your ventures into the realm of sex,” said Sara as she handed Sehun a folder.

Sehun froze in the chair. “I’m sorry, but did you say…” he trailed off, not wanting to say that word out loud.

“Sex. Yes, Sehun.”

He was already getting up to leave.

“No, stay,” Taeyong said. “We doubt your parents gave you this talk because based on what you’ve told us, you guys don’t talk enough unless it’s about wolfy things.”

“Right,” Sara said, clearing her throat. “So, we made an executive decision to be your guidance through sex.”

“Stop saying that word!” Sehun hissed under his breath.

Sara ignored him. She looked like a businesswoman right now. “Assuming that wolves also have sex and want to pleasure themselves, I think you should start slow with Kai. A blowjob maybe. Or use your hands first.”

“You need certain skills to perform a blowjob properly,” Taeyong added. “You must ask him what he knows. Does he know a lot? I hope not because that would mean he’s a hoe.”

“He’s not a hoe. He’s a wolf. You know, the whole one Soulbinder crap?” Sara said.

“That doesn’t mean he can’t screw around. And boys our age get urges. A lot of urges. Trust me, I know.”

“True.”

“I think I’m going to throw up in my mouth,” Sehun rasped. “Guys, please stop this.”

“Anyway, Sehun,” Sara began again. “You gotta start with kissing. Always kissing. They’re the gateway to heaven according to this webpage. You’ll know if he’s into it or not. Then put your hands all over his body. If he doesn’t stop you, you have my permission to put your hands in his pants.”

“ _Your_ permission?” Sehun grimaced. He stood up. “I don’t want to hear this.” He tried to hide his blushing face. “I’m not going to do any of that! And believe me, Kai doesn’t either. He still puts on his fuzzy socks before going to bed and likes _Dino Bites_!”

“That’s a different matter. That’s about comfort,” Taeyong argued. “I wear my fuzzy socks too when it gets a little chilly.”

“And who doesn’t like _Dino Bites_? They’re tasty and cute to eat,” Sara said, nodding her head. “But we’re saying, it’s not unusual to want to, you know, do dirty things.”

“And we know you want to,” Taeyong said. Sehun wanted to hide his face somewhere cold. “We see the way you look at him. You have that ‘put-your-jack-up-my-butthole-and-make-me-your-slut’ look on your face every time you’re in the same room with him!”

“Taeyong is right. I’ve seen that look, too.”

Sehun’s mouth fell hanging open. “I _do not_ have that look on my face! I don’t even know what that look’s supposed to mean!”

“We think you do. You know you want to climb him, straddle him and make him yours,” said Sara.

“I’m going,” Sehun spat. “Bye. You guys are the world’s most horrible friends.”

“We love you!” Sara called out after him as he stormed out of her room.

* * *

That night, when Kai climbed up to his treehouse after his parents were asleep, it was all that Sehun could think about.

“Why are you sitting all the way over there?” Kai asked confusedly when Sehun refused to join him on the bed. Instead, he sat in a corner of the treehouse, hugging his knees tightly to his chest. “Come here.”

“No,” Sehun said harshly.

Kai scratched his head. “Are you… mad at me or something? Do you want me to go?”

“Actually, yes,” Sehun said. “I’m not mad at you, but you should go.”

“But why? I thought you liked having me up here.”

Sehun kept mum, biting his tongue.

“Why do you have that look on your face?” Kai asked.

 _Oh, no_. Was it the ‘put-your-jack-up-my-butthole-and-make-me-your-slut’ look? Sehun was embarrassed to even think of it.

“You look… upset,” Kai said.

“Go home,” Sehun muttered.

Kai did not argue. He took off. And Sehun felt bad about making him leave for the rest of the night.

* * *

On Wednesday, there were five new cars parked on the sidewalk to Kai’s house. Both Sehun and his mother stood by the fence and spied.

“Did Kai tell you anything about having visitors?” his mother asked, just as nosy as Sehun was.

“No. He almost never talks about his family these days,” Sehun muttered.

“They’re all Regnandis, we know that at least.”

She was right. Sehun could smell them even from here. They stayed by the fence until the people walked out of Geun’s house. Geun looked furious and distressed as he stood on the porch. The men and women, who walked back to their cars, did not look happy either.

Sehun wanted to ask Kai about it later that night. But Kai didn’t show up.

* * *

His parents’ wedding anniversary arrived a couple of days before Sehun’s birthday. His father said he had done something special for his mother this year. He had booked them a table at the fanciest restaurant in the town nearby. It was an hour drive. So, he said that they’d spend the night in a motel in the other town.

It was the first time Sehun had had the house to himself.

He waited in his treehouse restlessly. He had lit a candle that smelled like vanilla. He had found it in his parents’ bedroom. They never lit it. So, he figured he’d put it to some good use.

He swore that if Kai didn’t show up tonight too, he’d march over to his boyfriend’s house and give him a good beating.

But then he heard something climbing up the rope ladder.

“Hey,” Kai said with his usual smile as he crawled into the treehouse.

“Where were you?” Sehun asked, scowling.

Kai gave him a sad look. “Sorry. I was… busy. Family stuff.”

“Who were those people at your house yesterday?”

“Nobody important.”

Sehun hated this. He hated that he was no longer a part of Kai’s family.

“You’re angry,” Kai noted. He closed the distance between Sehun and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I’m sorry.”

Sehun sighed. He could not stay mad at an Alpha now, could he? He wrapped his arms around Kai’s neck and hugged him, resting his face against Kai’s shoulder.

“I want you here. Every night,” Sehun whispered. “I don’t care what you’re doing during the day, but please be with me at night. Come home to me every night.”

Kai was silent for a moment before his arms tightened around Sehun. “I promise.”

As they settled on the bed, Sehun asked, “Is everything all right? At home, I mean.”

Kai hesitated to answer. “We’re having some trouble. But the Regnandis are always troublesome. We’ll handle it. Dad says he has it under control and he’ll find a way.”

“Is it… because of Chanri?”

Kai did not answer.

Sehun let it go and didn’t press him for more. Instead, he started thinking about what Sara and Taeyong had told him.

_Put your hands all over his body._

_Put your hands in his pants._

Sehun almost choked on air as his eyes wandered down Kai’s body and landed on his crotch. He averted his gaze immediately. Kai kissed him a moment later. It caught Sehun off-guard. They both moved closer to each other on the bed as the kiss deepened. Sehun brought his hands to Kai’s chest eventually and felt the wolf’s heart hammer against his palm.

Before Sehun could slide a hand under Kai’s shirt, Kai pulled away and said, “Maybe I should go home.”

“No, don’t,” Sehun gasped. “My parents aren’t home.”

Kai looked like he got the hint. But he didn’t act on it. He sat up and straightened his shirt, licking his slightly reddened lips. “I told my mom I’d be back quick.”

“Oh.” He exhaled heavily. “Okay.”

Kai leaned back down to give Sehun one last kiss on the lips before he scurried out of the treehouse.

Sehun let himself drift to sleep in his nest that felt too empty for one now.

* * *

He roused in the morning to a ruckus at the front door. Groaning, he climbed down the rope ladder and went back inside to answer the door that was being rapped on relentlessly. Until a moment ago, the doorbell was screeching repeatedly.

Prising the door open, he found two policemen on the doorstep. Behind them were Geun, Hana, and Kai. A squad car was parked on his street. Sehun wasn’t sure what astounded him more. The fact that he was faced with policemen for the first time or the fact that Geun and Hana had finally come over to his house.

But then he took note of the miserable looks on the Alphas’ face. Kai’s eyes were even red as he pushed past his parents and the officers to put his arms around Sehun and embrace him.

Sehun stilled in spot.

“I’m so sorry,” Kai whispered, holding Sehun tight in his arms.

“What’s… going on?” Sehun asked, completely stumped.

Kai pulled back and turned around. Geun stepped forward. “Sehun,” he said sadly. “It’s your parents.”

Sehun was still confused. One of the policemen spoke then. “Kid, there’s no easy way to put this,” the man said with a blank expression. “Your mother and father were found dead on the outskirts of the town earlier this morning. Their car had crashed into a tree and they were… mauled by what we believe to be wild animals.”

“We’re sorry for your loss,” said the other policeman. “It must have been an animal attack. But we’re investigating.”

Sehun must have been so dumb that he was not able to process a word they said.

That morning, Oakenbury curled up in nothing but black for him. Everything was just a surreal blur thereafter.

* * *

They held the funeral on his birthday. His aunts, uncles, grandparents, everyone came. Most of them he did not even recognize. The service was held at the biggest hall in Oakenbury. The last time he had been to a funeral, it had been Patty’s.

Grief was a strange thing.

It turned him numb.

And the numbness in turn made the world empty around him.

He had been sitting in a corner of his house ever since the policemen had showed up. Kai had been there with him every single minute of the day until yesterday evening. Sehun had not said a word to him. He couldn’t talk. Everyone who tried to talk to him told him to cry.

What was that about? Why did they want him to cry?

Sehun cried for many things in his life. He cried to get out of eating vegetables. He cried to watch his favourite TV show. He cried when he didn’t get good grades. He cried because a dog died in a movie. He cried when Kai didn’t kiss him back the first time kissed. He cried a lot.

But he couldn’t cry now.

He couldn’t talk. He couldn’t eat. He couldn’t breathe.

He was alone.

And it happened without a warning.

He stood near the closed caskets. An aunt of his put her hand on his shoulder. She said something, Sehun didn’t hear her. He stared at the caskets. They were going to take his parents away and he wasn’t even allowed to see them for one last time.

The last memory he would have of his parents was them walking out of their house, his mother’s arm around his father’s, both smiling and in love.

He couldn’t cry. He didn’t know why. He felt numb.

He looked up eventually. He felt dead.

His sleepless eyes tiredly scanned the crowd in the hall. It was big. His parents did not have a big family. But they had made a lot of friends in the town. Even Mrs. Bianchi was there, sobbing behind a handkerchief.

Everyone was there.

Sara and Taeyong stayed close to Sehun. Sara cried into Sehun’s shoulder.

Everyone was there. For him.

It took him a while to realize not everyone was there.

Without a word, he pulled away from Sara. He dragged his feet, almost dead on them, as he turned toward the exit. He was _numb_. So numb that his soul felt empty.

He took his black coat off and dropped it on the road as he started walking in the direction of his street.

It took him more than half an hour to reach the big cabinlike house at the end of the street. His feet were hurting. But he didn’t care. He was too numb on the inside to bother about the pain he felt on the out.

Hana was on the porch, locking the door from the outside.

Jaehyun and Jeni were sitting inside a car. Chanri was in the driver’s seat.

Geun was in their other car, waiting.

They weren’t dressed like they were going to a funeral.

Yixing loaded one final luggage in the boot of the car before shutting it.

All the furniture from the porch was gone. The curtains from the curtains were gone. The garage and the shed were emptied.

Kai stood by the porch steps, staring at a stuffed animal in his hand.

Sehun recognized it. Mr. Giraffe.

He turned around and looked at Sehun. He did not look surprised. Just sad.

Hana gave Kai’s arm a stroke before she climbed into the front seat of the car Geun was in. She did not even spare Sehun a look.

Yixing was frowning at Sehun. Then he too slinked into the car.

Kai took a nervous step forward as he started toward Sehun, clutching the stuffed animal in his hand. His puffy red eyes refused to meet Sehun’s.

“No,” Sehun said in a trembling breath as the tears finally began to sting his eyes. “No,” he whimpered.

Kai stopped and held Mr. Giraffe out to Sehun. A tear fell from Kai’s eye. Sehun took Mr. Giraffe, wrapping the hand around Kai’s as well.

“I will be back,” Kai muttered lifelessly, as though he did not believe it himself. “We have to go. They’ll come for Chanri if we don’t…”

“No,” Sehun said. His throat burned. His heart was about to give in. “I go wherever you go,” he whispered, tears blurring his vision. “I go… wherever… you... go.”

Kai stared at him with his own tears in his eyes. Then he shook his head. “You can’t. They won’t let you… You’re not one… of us.”

“Stay,” Sehun begged. “I will die.”

Kai’s hands flew up to the sides of Sehun’s head before he kissed Sehun desperately. “I love you. I love you, Sehun. I will come back for you.”

“You can’t leave me,” Sehun rasped, hands clinging to Kai’s shirt as he dropped Mr. Giraffe to the ground. “Please. Don’t. Please. Take me with you.”

“I can’t,” Kai wept. He pulled away then.

Sehun couldn’t move. He did nothing but watch Kai get into a car before both the cars drove away.

He dropped to his knees, still caught in a trance of disbelief as he cried uncontrollably. Picking Mr. Giraffe up, he hugged the toy to his chest and grieved, sobbing until he was out of breath.

_I go wherever you go…_

Lies.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out a [fanart](https://twitter.com/seraphicsekai/status/1064522435502985216) I drew for the fic! :D

Part Two

 

THE DIRT-ROAD. He could smell the forest all over the other boy, whose eyes were the widest of orbs filled with curiosity and wonder. Sehun wanted to bike away as fast as he could. But he stopped. He stopped because the strange boy had called out, “ _You there!”_

Sehun looked down at his shoeless foot on the pedal. Then he brought his head up to look at the boy, who was inhaling the air deeply.

 _“Go away, you ugly thing!”_ Sehun cried back at the annoying-looking boy.

The boy’s eyes narrowed. But he pushed his chest out and said, _“No. You go away.”_

Sehun stiffened, still mounted on his bike seat. He blinked at the other boy with the dark hair.

 _“You go away,”_ the boy said. _“I don’t need you. None of us do.”_

The rawness Sehun felt in his chest at the moment felt too real for this to be a dream.

What was once innocent was now tarnished.

A boy who once looked at Sehun with so much love now looked at him with contempt.

Sehun’s eyes flung open as the carousel of a dream waned. He squinted at the sunlight that pierced through the blinds against the windows of his bedroom. His ears rang at the shrieking alarm clock on the bedside table. He slammed it to shut up.

Sitting up a moment later, he held his head in his hands and took a few deep breaths. Just three breaths no longer worked. They could never ease the hate and resentment that washed over him his every waking moment.

The air in the room was tepid, lifeless as always. The sun poured in for several minutes in the morning before leaving the room and the rest of the town in gloominess for the rest of the day. Sehun hated those _several minutes in the morning_ the most.

He rubbed his eyes on the hilt of his palms and groaned. Another cursed dream. As much as he wanted to escape them, they kept him in check sometimes. Reminding him of the betrayal and the abandonment that numbed his soul but intensified his grievance. He needed that anger to get out of bed every day and face the world. He needed some sort of energy to keep going.

Grief would get better with time, they said. Yes, it had. But betrayal didn’t.

After grabbing a cup of hot coffee, he jumped into the shower for a quick wash. He no longer looked himself in the mirror except to shave once a month. He barely had facial hairs, thanks to the hormones he’d never need.

Oakenbury. A small town, mired in humidity, cold, dampness, rain all year long, save the few weeks of warm summer in the middle of the year when the tree thrived, and the forest breathed. The forest that skirted the town, home to wild beasts and harmless branches alike.

Towns like Oakenbury would see very few changes even after decades. There were a couple of new shops. Some existing shops had a few upgrades. There were new roads. More people had cars now. Sehun had a car of his own. Nothing fancy. Just a second-hand _Prius_ he had bought from Mrs. Bianchi after her husband died for one-third of what Mr. Bianchi had paid for it.

What had changed the most in the last ten years in Oakenbury was not something the humans bothered themselves with. Sehun didn’t either.

Rexits roamed freely in Oakenbury now. And there were more of them with every passing day. Those who were permanently in their wolves had made the forests their territories. There hadn’t been any incident, though. Not after… Sehun’s parents.

The Aequuses, on the other hand, stayed out of the Rexits’ way.

“Good morning, boss,” said the young waitress Sehun had hired two days ago when he ambled into the bakery, which Mrs. Bianchi had long turned into a café. _Bianchi’s Café._ It was a competition for _Carlos’ Diner._ Sehun didn’t think Sebastián minded it, though.

“Morning. Get back to work, Alana,” Sehun said and walked straight to the counter. After Mr. Bianchi passed, Mrs. Bianchi fell ill. When she handed Sehun the ‘manager’ tag and apron, she said, _“You’re the boss now, kid.”_

Sehun had just left his grandparents who raised him for two years after his parents had died. Two years of hell. Two years of nothing but misery. He had lost count of the days he’d sit in a corner of his room and replay the day of his parents’ funeral. The day he was left behind by everyone he had loved the most. He left his grandparents’ as soon as he turned eighteen and moved back into his home. The home near the big cabinlike house at the end of the street.

He had thought Mrs. Bianchi was doing him a favour by letting him run her bakery, which by that time was already a café. Sehun was in no position to decline. He needed the money.

He had dropped out of school when he was seventeen, figuring that he was never going to graduate. His grandparents hadn’t been happy about it. He didn’t care. He barely knew his grandparents, who had never even bothered to visit him once when he was a child because they were mad about their daughter eloping with a man they didn’t approve of.

Now, at the age of twenty-six, he stood behind the same counter he had stood behind ten years ago, watching the customers walk in through the door with big smiles on their faces as the waitress directed them towards a table.

He glanced at the sidewalk through the café’s window. A painful memory flashed before his eyes. Kai waved at him with one hand while the other was gripping the handlebar of his bike while he waited for Sehun to be done with his shift.

Sehun shook the memory away and viciously crumpled a discarded receipt in his hand.

“Boss,” Alana, the new girl, said when she was no longer attending the customers. “I was wondering if I can take off an hour early today?”

Sehun did not reply as he went through the invoices.

“It’s my three-month anniversary with my boyfriend,” Alana said, grinning.

Sehun sighed. “Sure.”

“Thanks, boss. You’re the best!”

* * *

After the struck seven and Alana had punched out, Sehun attended the last two customers of the day. As soon as they were gone, he turned the sign to ‘closed’ at the door before he started cleaning up.

The bell chimed. He didn’t have to turn around to recognize Mrs. Bianchi’s scent.

He set the broom aside anyway and pulled up a chair for the old woman.

“Such a sweet boy,” she said, smiling as she sank in her seat. “Too bad you’re not seeing anyone. I know another sweet Aequus boy who’s single, you know?”

“You’ve told me,” Sehun scoffed and shook his head.

“Well, you should give him a shot.” The woman sighed. “How did the business go today?”

“Uneventful,” he said, leaning back against a table. “Should I get you a coffee?”

She waved him off. “No need for that. I came to see you actually.”

“I’m fine being single, Mrs. Bianchi.”

“Yes. Yes. I know. We’ve already established that, although I still think you should go out and date some nice boys before you waste away all your youth and regret it like I do.”

Sehun snorted.

“Anyway,” she sat up straighter and turned her face serious. The last time she had worn that face, she was telling Sehun that she trusted him to take good care of her café. “I came to tell you that you can’t do this job forever.”

Sehun frowned. “But—”

“Bup-bup-bup. Let me finish. You can always work here. But this job will get you nowhere, son. You’re going to be stuck in this godforsaken town for the rest of your life.”

Sehun didn’t think that was so bad. The only people he knew were from Oakenbury. Besides, he didn’t think he could cut it out in the world.

“I spoke to a friend,” Mrs. Bianchi then said. “He told me that his employer is looking for a caregiver for his eleven-year-old son. I think you’d be perfect for the position.”

Sehun cocked a brow. “You want me to leave my job as a manager and become a… nanny?”

She laughed despite herself. “It’s Kali’s son.”

Sehun’s eyes almost popped out. “He’s a Rexit.”

And not just any Rexit. From what Sehun had heard, the man was feared by every Rexit and Aequus in town. Some rumours held that even a few Regnandis did not dare cross his path. When he and his son had moved into Oakenbury, they had been quite the talk of the town. Not because he was an exiled Alpha wolf, but because he was wealthy. And powerful. He had bought the lumber, beer, and paper factories in Oakenbury, which made him more influential than the town Mayor.

He had come out of nowhere. And he stayed mostly silent. Like a predator lurking in the shadows.

Sehun often wondered what the man could have done to get kicked out of his pack. Most Rexits were Betas. But Kali was an Alpha. An Alpha without a pack was the most dangerous, Mrs. Bianchi had said.

“Yes, he is,” she muttered. “But the town is swarming with Rexits, kid. Pretty soon, they’re going to take the town for themselves. You’re going to need one on your side when that happens if you’re going to make it. And what’s better than going straight for the big man? This is a great opportunity. And it pays three times of what I pay you here!”

Sehun was tempted by the offer. But no. “Mrs. Bianchi, I appreciate you looking out for me. But I’m done with wolf business. I want no part to play in all of these Rexit games. I think I’ve had… enough of wolves to last me a lifetime. I don’t want to be involved in any Rexit business.”

Especially not after what they had done to his parents.

She exhaled disappointedly. “All right.” Sehun watched her fish out a card from her purse. “But in case you change your mind, this is his contact information and address.”

Sehun was reluctant to accept the name card. But he didn’t stop Mrs. Bianchi when she slid it into his jeans’ pocket.

* * *

 _Kali_. A single name. No last name. That was strange.

Sehun flipped the card to the back and stared at the blank side. Then he surveyed the address again.

“Are you done with that beer?”

He brought his head up and looked at Sebastián on the other side of the counter with a jaded gaze. “Hey, what have you heard about this Kali guy that moved to Oakenbury like six years ago?”

Baz scratched his head and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know. Just the things everyone hears, I guess. Why are you asking?”

Sehun did not reply as he stared at the name card again.

Baz brought him another bottle of beer. “Don’t drive,” he muttered before he wandered away to a booth to take a customer’s order.

“I thought you’ll be a no-show again,” Taeyong said before he patted on Sehun’s shoulder. He turned around and looked up at Taeyong.

Sehun tried to smile. “I said I’ll come.”

“You said you’ll come two times before and you didn’t show up,” Taeyong grumbled and took a seat on the barstool at the diner’s counter. “And Sara wanted to see you when she was visiting last week. You didn’t show up either.”

“I was caught up with work.” He sighed. “How is she?”

“Well, she’s mad you’re not returning her calls.”

Sehun felt bad about that. And that was a big deal because he felt bad about nothing anymore. “I’ll apologize to her next time.”

Taeyong heaved a breath and hailed Baz over. “Hey, Sebastián.”

“Beer and fries?” Baz said.

“You know me so well.”

Baz nodded his head and disappeared into the kitchen. Over the years, somehow, they had become friends with Baz. Or whatever the closest thing to friends was. It started when Baz’s father, Carlos gave in to arthritis and stopped coming in to work, and it was up to Baz to run the diner now. He had needed the support and confidence. Sara was the one who had come up with the idea that they should become friends with Baz.

Baz was a nice guy. Probably the nicest guy Sehun knew. The guy never swore. He never gossiped. He never talked ill behind someone’s back. He respected his father and mother. He took home every stray cat he saw on the street.

He was probably too nice.

It annoyed Taeyong a little.

“How’s work?” Sehun asked Taeyong.

Taeyong shrugged. “Kids. You know. God, I hope we weren’t as infuriatingly insufferable when we were teenagers,” he groaned, taking a sip of the beer Baz brought him.

“Well, you’re the one who wanted to become a high school teacher,” Sehun muttered.

“Yeah. I didn’t think it would be this unrewarding. While Sara is having all her fun in that big ass city.”

Sehun still couldn’t get used to seeing Sara in pantsuit. But it was not such a surprise that she had become a lawyer. Like her mother. She was the most intelligent person Sehun knew. And she could win a war with just her words.

“What’s that?” Taeyong asked, noting the name card Sehun was clutching in his hand.

“Mrs. Bianchi came in with a job offer for me today.” He rubbed his temples. “It’s supposed to pay thrice of what I’m currently getting. A caregiver.”

Taeyong choked on his beer. “They’re paying that much for a babysitter?”

“It sounds like a glorified title. There has to be a catch. It’s a caregiver for… Kali’s son.”

Taeyong gasped.

Sehun jumped with a start. “Easy. Don’t give that reaction unless someone’s holding a gun behind me.”

“Sorry. But _Kali?_ The big shot Kali?”

“Yeah.”

“I heard about his son. He’s been described as ‘challenged’. Whatever that meant. No one has even seen his son. Maybe it’s a trap. You said he’s a wolf, right? A Rexit. Maybe he’s planning to lure you in and kill you?”

“Why? ‘Cause I’ve been serving too many hot chocolates and opera cakes to too many people in the town?” Sehun rolled his eyes.

“Are you gonna take it?”

“No,” Sehun blurted out. “It’s crazy.”

“Hey,” Baz said as he walked up to Sehun with a glass of beer. “That guy over there bought you this on his tab.”

Sehun’s eyebrows dipped low in a scowl. He turned his head halfway around and looked at the bearded man in the flannel shirt Baz was pointing at. He looked forty, and he was smirking at Sehun.

“This is why you shouldn’t have gone open with your sexuality,” Taeyong whispered.

“I didn’t,” Sehun growled, turning away from the old geezer.

“Well, for what it’s worth, he doesn’t look too bad. And when was the last time you got laid? Oh, wait a second. Never.” Taeyong shook his head. “My friend, I need you to spread your legs to someone soon. You’re starting to get wrinkles.”

Even though Sehun knew Taeyong was only making harmless banters, his insides were turned up in knots. It made him sick as the brutal memories came rushing back to him.

Taeyong’s humour died from his expression. “Dude, don’t tell me you’re still hung up on him.”

Sehun glanced back at his beer bottle on the countertop. “Of course not,” he lied. “But I told you… I have no time for this.”

He loosened his hand around the bottle, careful not to break it. He did not need to cause a scene right now.

“He’s out of your life, Sehun,” Taeyong said in a low voice. “It’s been more than five years since you last saw him. Stop thinking about him.”

“I’m not thinking about him,” Sehun spat through his teeth and jolted up. “I need to get going.”

Tossing a few bills on the counter, he stormed out of the diner before all that beer got to his head and staggered him. He paused on the sidewalk and crouched to let the world stop spinning around him for a moment.

Gripping his hands around his knees, he stared at the puddle of rainwater that was still stagnant on the sidewalk. Mustering his reflection, he thought about how it had indeed been more than five years since he had last seen Kai.

* * *

First, it had been a phone call. It was at the end of the year when Sehun’s parents died. Almost eight months after Geun and his family left him crying on the dirt driveway.

 _“Hello?”_ Sehun had heard a nervous voice say. He recognized it immediately. And it made him cry. _“Sehun, how are you?”_ Kai had asked.

Sehun held his hand to his chest and fisted his shirt. He swallowed a sob and shakily whispered, _“I-I miss you.”_

Kai fell quiet for a moment. _“I miss you, too.”_

Sehun wanted to ask how he had gotten hold of his grandparents’ house phone number. He wanted to know how Kai was doing. He wanted to where he was. How was Geun? How was Hana? How was Yixing, Chanri, Jaehyun and Jeni? He wanted to know when Kai was coming back like he had promised. He wanted to know when they would meet again.

Instead of all the things he could have asked, he decided to go with, _“Do you… have my shoe?”_

Kai didn’t say anything in reply.

Sehun wiped a tear that fell down his cheek.

 _“I have to go,”_ Kai then muttered. _“I love you.”_

Before Sehun could say it back, the call ended.

Kai sent a letter without a sender’s address when Sehun was eighteen. It was a long letter. He told Sehun that he was graduating from high school a year early. He was going away for college soon. He would come see Sehun then.

Sehun waited every day for Kai to come _see_ him.

When he finally did, it was at Sara, Taeyong and Baz’s graduation. He had stood in the crowd silently until Sehun had caught a whiff of his scent.

He had not been sure if his heart broke a little more or if it were mended when he turned around to find Kai in the crowd, dressed in a black shirt and blue jeans. He was smiling. He looked _different._ Good different.

Sehun wanted to run into his arms. But he could not make himself move. At Kai’s side, Geun stood, a protective hand on his son’s shoulder.

 _“How are you?”_ Kai had asked as he and Geun approached Sehun.

Sehun had been so tongue-tied that he could not get a word out without stuttering. _How are you?_ That was what Kai had had to say to him?

He looked up at Geun. The man gave him a small smile.

Kai was right in front of him. Sehun’s soul was right in front of him. All he had to do was reach out to touch him. But he couldn’t. Because even though he _knew_ Kai’s soul, he no longer recognized the man standing before him. This was not the man who had made _so many_ promises to Sehun. This was a man who had heavy responsibilities on his shoulders.

 _“I’m fine,”_ Sehun had said.

Kai smiled and nodded.

Kai called one more time after a year later to tell Sehun that he would be visiting in three weeks. This time, he would not be coming with his father.

Sehun had hung up without saying a word.

 _“I can’t believe I won’t be seeing you idiots for months,”_ Sara said when they met up at the only bar in the town that allowed twenty-year-olds, who were only a month away from turning twenty-one. Sehun was glad he got in because he wanted to say goodbye to Sara.

 _“I can’t believe you decided to be a lawyer,”_ Taeyong said with a grimace. Baz had sat this one out because he did not like going to bars. _“I’m embarrassed for you.”_

 _“At least I won’t be cleaning up after children for the rest of my life,”_ Sara shot at her brother.

Sehun tried to take it positively. He should be happy for Sara. But he could not ignore the fact that another person he loved was going away from him. And even though she said that she’d come back, Sehun knew it was never going to be the same.

 _“Sehun,”_ Sara hissed suddenly over the blaring music. _“Don’t turn around right away, but a cute guy is totally checking you out.”_

Sehun turned around right away to look at the man leering at him from the other side of the bar with a drink in his hand. Sehun blinked. It was the first time a man had looked at him like that…

Well, since Kai.

He turned back to his friends. _“No, he isn’t,”_ he said.

 _“He is,”_ Taeyong said.

 _“You should go say hi,”_ Sara nudged him. _“He’s got the whole rugged thing going.”_

Sehun glanced back at the stranger. He was tall, broad-shouldered, and had a light stubble. Dark-haired, slightly dark-skinned. The man now smirked in his way. Sehun’s cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

A while later, the man walked over. _“Hi,”_ he had said.

Sehun swallowed hard as his friends giggled and left him alone. _“Hi.”_

The man introduced himself. Sehun didn’t care for it. _“So, you want to get out of here?”_ the man asked.

Sehun had said yes. And the next thing he knew, he was in a cab back home with a stranger. Sara approved of it. She said it was exactly what he needed.

And she was right.

For the past couple of days, everything had just been _hot_. And the thoughts of Kai were making Sehun do disgusting things to his body. Every night, he’d come home and put his hands on parts of his body that even he was ashamed of touching. And it did not make the heat go away. In the end, he’d cry himself to sleep, unsure of how to deal with the feverish hunger that never went away no matter how much he ate or drank or jerked off.

He had even gone to the doctor, who told him that he needed to just rest. It could be stress.

It wasn’t until Sara suggested that he could be going into his first heat cycle did it ever occur to him that it could even a thing. He wanted to ask Mrs. Bianchi more about it but was too ashamed to do it.

So, here he was. In his bedroom. With a stranger whose name he no longer remembered.

He sat nervously on the edge of his bed as he watched the man take his jacket and shirt off.

 _“What are you waiting for?”_ the man asked, smiling smugly as he tossed his shirt to the floor.

Sehun gulped. _“I’ve… never done this before.”_

The other guy paused. _“What?”_

Sehun flushed red. _“Is that… a problem?”_

_“Um… Not really. Well, what do you want to do, then? Do you want the top or the bottom or…?”_

Sehun wanted to hide somewhere. This was a horrible idea. When he didn’t answer, the stranger stepped forward with a smirk.

 _“Does your silence mean it’s up to me to decide?”_ he said, curling his hands around Sehun’s arms.

An odd sensation shot up Sehun’s spine. He shuddered and pulled away. _“I think this was a bad idea,”_ he muttered, shooting up from the bed. He didn’t want to. He couldn’t. The thought of moving on was enticing. But the thought of letting someone else touch him repulsed him.

_Will you always love me and always be for only me? Will you always go wherever I go?_

He had said his vows. It made him sick just to think of breaking them.

 _“Are you serious?”_ the man said, arching an eyebrow. _“We can just… have a little fun, you know?”_

Sehun frowned. _“I’m… sorry. I can’t.”_

The doorbell rang.

In the middle of the night.

Both Sehun and the stranger looked in the direction of the front door. _“Are you expecting someone?”_ the man queried confusedly.

Sehun started out of the bedroom and hurried through the hallway to get the door. As soon as he pried it open, he saw two pools of ruby red flashing at him. Then he saw the bared fangs.

 _“Who is that?”_ Kai growled word after word, sounding more wolf than human.

Sehun stood frozen in the doorway, gaping at Kai.

 _“Is everything okay?”_ the stranger said from inside.

Kai’s red eyes darted past Sehun’s shoulder and landed on the shirtless man. With a vicious growl, he lurched forward, almost shoving past Sehun. _“You’re fucking other people?!”_

Bringing his hands up to Kai’s chest, Sehun pushed him away with every might he had. Kai staggered back and then with shock, his eyes turned dark again.

 _“Get out of here,”_ Sehun spat.

Kai blinked, the anger sliding off his face only to be replaced by sorrow. _“Sehun?”_

 _“You don’t get to come back here,”_ Sehun snapped. _“You don’t get to give me a phone call once in two years and show up once in four years and then come back here.”_

Kai looked crestfallen. _“Sehun… I had to go…”_ His eyes glimmered with tears. _“I… had to. I didn’t want to leave you behind.”_

 _“But you did,”_ Sehun shouted. _“You_ and _your entire family. Left me behind, Kai. On the road. Alone. Right after I was orphaned. It felt like a colossal ‘fuck you’ from the universe for loving and trusting you.”_

Kai stood there, speechless and horror-struck.

 _“So, no. You don’t get to waltz back into my life like nothing happened!”_ He shoved Kai back by the chest again. _“You don’t get to tell me that I shouldn’t be fucking other people. Because you’re no one to me. Just like how I was nobody to you after I had given you my heart and soul.”_ He stopped to take a breath. Through all the anger, a little woe caught in his throat. _“I wasn’t the one who came after you. You wanted me. You chased after me. And then, you ruined me. I was ready to face everything. I still would be. You gave me all that hope. You made all those promises. You promised you’d always protect me. You promised you’d be the best boyfriend. You promised you’d be better than Kiena, better than Clary. You promised you’d always be there for me. You promised you’d come home to me every night. You promised you’d come back. You promised me so much, you asshole!”_

His voice carried across the street.

Kai took a step back, his wide eyes betraying a few tears.

 _“I’m an Aequus Omega,”_ Sehun whispered, wiping his own tears. _“You’re a Regnandi Alpha. That doesn’t mean you get to walk all over me. I am_ done _waiting for you, Kai. I am done trying to forgive you and gloss over the fact that you didn’t fight for me, you didn’t protect me, you weren’t fucking there for me when I needed you the most. Do you know how lonely I was? I lost my pack, my mother, my father, my lover, my future, my sanity, you who were my everything. In a single day. And you didn’t fight for me. You chose your pack over me. You lied to me. You lied to me!”_

Kai shook his head, crying. _“Sehun, please. Don’t do this.”_

 _“Leave,”_ Sehun said again sternly. _“Leave and never come back. You’re good at that.”_

 _“Sehun, please…”_ he said, eyes red and teary.

 _“I built a nest once, Kai. I was building one since I was a baby. For me and my mate, my Soulbinder. It would be for us, I thought. It would be for us and our family. Our little pack.”_ He took a breath. Kai looked like he was about to crumble to his knees. He could have commanded Sehun to yield. He was an Alpha after all. But he did nothing but listen to what Sehun had to say. Because deep down, he knew he deserved it all. _“I was never your pack… Go away.”_

He slammed the door shut before he leaned against it and broke into a sob.


	13. Chapter 13

Monday morning, he stood outside the gate of the biggest, grandest house in all of Oakenbury. It was purlieus of the outskirts of the town with its own lands. The forest trees loomed around the manor that once belonged to the maple factory owner.

Sehun realized he had never been in this part of town. Oakenbury was indeed a quiet town. But it was quieter down here. So quiet that he could the whistle in the wind and the rustle of the branches.

He convinced himself that he was only here to humour Mrs. Bianchi. After all, he needed no part in any affair that involved a Rexit. Another consensus was that curiosity got the best of him.

He stared at the manor for minutes. Then eventually, he rang the doorbell and waited with a slight consternation in his stomach. When he looked up the overcasts shrouding the blue sky, he wondered if it would rain soon. The door creaked open after a while.

“May I help you?” asked a woman, clad in a white uniform. An Omega wolf. Sehun was almost certain that she was a Rexit.

Kali had servants? How rich was this man? It seemed like a good time to point out that Sehun never knew some Rexits made a nice living. He pegged them all for murderous beasts.

“Uh, yeah, hi,” he let out, pulling out the name card. “I’m here… um, to see… Mr. Kali? Mrs. Bianchi gave me his name card and told me that he’s looking for a caregiver for his son.”

“Oh,” the servant lady said and held the door wider. “Come in, then. I will let the Master know of your presence.”

“Thank you.” He entered the manor.

The interior seized his breath for a good two minutes. It was all Victorian, all mahogany, drapes, carpets, and marble. But it quiet, too.

Sehun heard his own footfalls echo through the hallways as the servant directed him toward what she called ‘the drawing room’. Until he was in the room and realized it was a living room, he thought it was a room for drawing.

There was an ancient piano, a couple of chaise lounges, portraits on the walls, a red curtain against the windows, and a fireplace.

The room reeked of wolf scents.

“Have a seat,” said the servant. “Master will be down soon to see you.”

Sehun nodded and sank in one of the chaise lounges as the servant hurried away. This felt surreal. What was he doing in a Rexit’s home? For all that he knew, Rexits had murdered his parents.

 _Not all of them are bad,_ he remembered Mrs. Bianchi telling him one day.

No, they weren’t. Sehun knew better than to put them all in the same mixing pot and judge them collectively. But he didn’t want to share the same fate as his parents by getting involved with a Rexit or a Regnandi.

So, what was he doing here?

Even though he always tried to ignore it, it was there. In the back of his mind. The question of who could have murdered his parents. Sure, it was a wolf attack. But he never found out who had done it. He could never avenge his parents. He was helpless and weak and useless.

Wasn’t that why Geun and his family abandoned him?

He clenched his hands into fists on his lap. He stared at the stamped-out embers on the fireplace. He wasn’t exactly dressed right to meet a royal man. He wasn’t sure if Kali was even royal. He only knew that he was rich, and he lived rich.

Sehun caught a whiff of the strong Alpha scent before he heard the man’s gruff voice.

“What’s your name, kid?”

He shot up from the chaise lounge and turned around to look at the burly, massive man saunter into the room, clad in a black T-shirt and jeans. His short black hair and beard had white strands in them. His ears were pierced. Intricate tattoos ran up his arms and neck. His blue eyes were glaring in Sehun’s way. He looked like a thug from the backstreets of the town where nothing good happened. A very _attractive_ thug.

The man walked over to the liquor cart and poured himself some scotch. Then nursing the tumbler in his hand, he turned and faced Sehun with an arched eyebrow.

“Asked you a question,” the man said.

“Uh… I’m Sehun,” he stuttered out. “I’m waiting for Mr. Kali.”

The stranger pinned him with a sharp look. “You’re looking at him.”

Sehun’s jaw almost dropped. This… wasn’t at all what he was expecting. And the man looked a little old to be an eleven-year-old’s father. Must be in mid-forties.

And he was a wolf, so he was probably older than he looked. Late-forties, then.

“ _You’re_ Kali?” Sehun said, grimacing. When the man’s expression hardened, he quickly cleared his throat. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything bad by it. I just… I had a completely different image of you in my head.”

Kali slowly nodded his head. “Enough chitchat,” he spat, taking a sip of the scotch. “You think you can handle the job?”

Sehun tried to stop staring at the man. He was _huge_. The hugest man or wolf Sehun had ever laid his eyes upon. He’d be sure if only his memories of Geun weren’t distorted.

“I actually… don’t know, sir,” he muttered. “I just came here without… thinking much. Mrs. Bianchi told me that you’d pay a lot for someone to take care of your… son. But you must have a lot of applicants.”

“I’m looking for an Aequus with a… gentle temperament,” the man said, sighing. “I only hire my own kind in this household. I was hoping for…” He paused to scan Sehun from head to toe. “A male,” he finished after a while. “My son tends to get shy around women. Your job’s easy. You keep my son company. Play with him. Make sure he doesn’t get lonely.”

“I see.” Sehun heaved a breath. “I haven’t decided on taking the job. Can I… see your son first?”

Kali did not respond immediately. He surveyed Sehun’s face for a long moment. “All right.” He left the room.

Sehun finally breathed. He had not taken in a scent that strong in a very long time, his knees almost gave in. He sat down and buried his face in his hands. Myriads of questions were running in his head. Who was Kali? Why did he move to Oakenbury? Where was his wife? His mate? Why did he look like a street hoodlum that were up to no good? How was he this wealthy? And most importantly, how did he become a Rexit?

A shifting Alpha. He must have been a Regnandi if he weren’t born to Rexit parents.

“Jax, I want you to meet your potential new friend, Sehun,” Kali’s voice surged back into the room.

Sehun rose from his seat to look at the boy being wheeled into the room in an electric wheelchair. He had dark hair like his father, dark eyes, tan skin, and a sour scowl on his eyebrows.

“I don’t like him, Daddy,” were the first words that came out of his mouth when he saw Sehun. “He smells ugly.”

Sehun wasn’t sure if he were more insulted by that or taken aback by the skin-and-bones legs that were dangling over the seat of the wheelchair. The boy was paralyzed waist-down.

“You don’t even know him, Jax,” Kali said, brushing his lips to his son’s temple, holding the back of the little boy’s head. “Give him a chance.”

“I don’t want to,” the boy spat adamantly, still glowering at Sehun like he was about to burn his soul. “He’s so pale. He looks like he’s a Vampire.”

“Now, that’s ridiculous. Vampires don’t exist,” Kali said, smirking like he had made a funny joke. Neither his son nor Sehun shared his humour.

The boy was scowling so hard that Sehun thought the boy might just attack him.

“I don’t want him. Make him go away.” With that, the boy turned the wheelchair around and mended his way out of the room.

Kali huffed heavily, hands on his waist. “It’s get harder with every year,” he mumbled under his breath.

Sehun licked his lips. “I’m sorry. I didn’t… know he was…”

Kali’s eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah. I didn’t think you did.” He picked up the tumbler again and swigged the remaining alcohol. “So, do you think you’re up for the job?”

“He doesn’t… look like he likes me much.”

“It takes him a while to get used to people. He doesn’t see a lot of them.” He stopped to stare out the window. “All he wants is to run in the forest as a wolf.”

“Can he?” Sehun asked before he could rethink the question. Kali looked at him again.

“Can he shift? No. Even if he did, those legs are not going to help him run a lot, are they?” He scoffed, shaking his head. “Take a day or two to mull over it. If you’re interested, come back here and we’ll discuss your pay and other details.”

As Kali started toward the door, Sehun said, “You’re not like the Rexits?”

Kali stilled. “What?”

Sehun swallowed. “I don’t want to work for… wolves who hurt… people.”

It took Kali a moment to reply, but when he did, he didn’t sound thrilled. “What are the wolves that don’t hurt people, then?”

Sehun knew it wasn’t a question he had the answer to.

Kali laughed then. “You, like all the other naïve Aequuses and Regnandis, think the Regnandis are the good ones.” He smiled wide, but there was no life behind the smile. “I do hope you take the job though, _Sehun_.” He said nothing more and ambled out of the ‘drawing’ room.

* * *

“So, are you going to take it?” Taeyong asked the next day at the diner.

Sehun exhaled exasperatedly. “I don’t know. I kind of need the money. I’m not getting anywhere working in a small-town café.”

“I wouldn’t mind if you closed the café down,” Baz said with a smirk when he overheard Sehun, walking past him. “It’ll help my business.”

“I don’t own the café,” Sehun sighed.

“I know. I’m just trying to defuse the tension.” He patted on Sehun’s shoulder before he went away.

“So, you should take the job. It’s not every day somebody offers you thousands of bucks for being their son’s friend,” Taeyong said.

“It seems fishy. I don’t feel… good about working for a Rexit, you know? Even though he sounds like a decent man. He _looks_ nothing like it, though.”

“Yeah. I heard he’s a… bit of a rowdy,” said Taeyong. “Not that it’s a bad thing. He hasn’t killed anyone.”

“How are you sure about that? The guy literally looks like an ex-con. And his son is… in a wheelchair. But he has the meanest lip on him. How did that even happen to a… wolf, you know? It seems like this Kali guy has everything under control but… how did he become a Rexit.”

Taeyong shrugged. “I think you’re having bit of a loyalty issue here.”

Sehun frowned. “How?”

“You know. All your life, you’ve been devoted to the Regnandis. They hate the Rexits. The Rexits and the Regnandis are like the _Tonya Harding_ and _Nancy Kerrigan_ of the wolf world. You feel a little nervous about taking this job because deep down, you’ve been wired to hate the Rexits and be chary of them because you grew up around the Regnandis who loathed them.”

Sehun couldn’t argue with that even though he told himself that that wasn’t the case. But what if it was? What if that was why he could never actually look at a Rexit without being judgmental and cautious?

“That would be bullshit, though,” he said after a while. “I have no ties with the Regnandis.”

“Uh-huh,” Taeyong scoffed. “That’s why you still have that treehouse with your nest and you refuse to even go into the backyard so that you won’t have to look at it.”

Sehun rose from the barstool. “Since when did you get all know-it-all-y?” He paid for the food and beer before he decided to head back home.

The whole drive, he wished Taeyong hadn’t reminded him of the treehouse. Because now, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. And the memories he had forged in there.

* * *

 _“You have really small toes,”_ Kai commented, picking at Sehun’s toes one by one.

Sehun giggled. _“Stop. That’s ticklish.”_

Biting his smirking lip, Kai tugged at his toes again. Sehun laughed, falling back on the bed while Kai was seated against the treehouse’s wall.

 _Let’s Stay Together_ by _Al Green_ was playing softly on the radio. Earlier, Kai said that it was one of his favourite songs.

 _“Kai, I said stop,”_ Sehun wheezed and panted when Kai wouldn’t stop tickling the sole of his foot. When the wolf didn’t listen, Sehun growled and stomped on Kai’s chest, slamming the boy back against the wall.

Kai chuckled, holding Sehun’s foot to his chest. _“Oof, you’re really aggressive sometimes, did you know? When I become a proper Alpha, I’m going to nip all that bossiness in the bud.”_

_“Whatever.”_

Kai curled his hands around the top of Sehun’s foot that was pressed against his chest and raised it. Sliding his thumbs along the sides of the foot, he gently brushed his lips on the sole. Sehun’s heart skipped a fierce beat. He sat up. Kai’s eyes were on his own as he slowly peppered the foot with light kisses.

 _“Stop,”_ Sehun whispered, cheeks burning hot. _“P-Please.”_

 _“All right,”_ Kai said and released the foot before he crawled forward and kissed Sehun on the lips.

* * *

Sehun loosened his hands around the steering wheel before exiting the car. Attempting to bury the sorrow that was bubbling in his chest, he stopped on his porch.

Then instead of going inside, he climbed over the fence and started up the rope ladder after walking over to the tree.

He glanced up at the treehouse, his heart quickening with every step he advanced upwards.

Taeyong was right. He hadn’t had the courage to even look at the treehouse, in which he had once built his perfect nest, for the last decade.

Climbing onto the veranda of the treehouse, he paused to stare at the closed door for a moment. He then shoved it open. Palls of dust slapped against his face and he coughed, covering his mouth with an arm.

He pulled his phone out for some light. It was a mess in there.

His nest was destroyed. He walked in.

The photographs Kai had taken of them one summer with his new polaroid camera were still pinned to the walls. Sehun blankly stared at them for a moment.

He thought his heart could not break any more than it already had. He was proven wrong again and again.

He turned to the hoodie in the corner. Kai’s hoodie, which Sehun had been determined to make an addition to his nest.

In another corner was his baby blanket resting on top of a dusty cushion. Next to it, was the battery-powered radio. Sehun doubted it still worked.

He sat down in the dark treehouse and loosely hugged his knees, staring at the tattered photographs.

Then he searched up _Al Green_ on his phone.

As the song played, he burrowed his face between his knees and recalled every memory he still had of Kai and his family. Down to the night he had slammed the door in Kai’s face and told him to go away.

_I’m so in love with you. Whatever you want to do is alright with me, ‘cause you make me feel so brand new. And I want to spend my life with you. Let me say that since, baby, since we’ve been together, loving you forever is what I need._

_Oh, let me be the one you come running to, I’ll never be untrue…_

He turned the song off and headed back down.

He would work for Kali, he decided then. He would not be loyal to the Regnandis no more. They never deserved it, anyway.

* * *

He woke the next morning to the sound of a ruckus. He groaned in dismay. He still had an hour before the alarm went off.

Cursing silently, he climbed out of the bed and made some coffee, listening to truck tyres and engines grumbling on the street.

When he looked out his kitchen window, he found some of the neighbours out on their porches, all looking toward the end of the street.

“What the hell is that all about,” Sehun muttered to himself and wandered outside with a cup of coffee in his hand.

A neighbour waved at him. He ignored the man. He didn’t even know the man’s name. “We’re getting new neighbours!” the guy screeched over his gate. “That house has been abandoned for years, hasn’t it? I’ve never seen anyone live in it.”

Sehun blinked a few times, eyebrows scrunched down in confusion before he turned his head toward the cabinlike house at the end of the street.

Moving trucks and three black, shiny cars were parked near it. Sehun wasn’t sure if it were déjà Vu or if he were really revisiting his memory of the day Geun’s family moved into that house.

The tall, big man. The pretty woman. Two girls, three boys. One ugly.

The coffee mug slipped from his hand and shattered against the concrete.

The numbness returned.

All those years of agony and loneliness returned.

Betrayal. Abandonment. Grief. Everything came back to him.

He saw Hana on the porch. She had grown older.

Jeni was helping Jaehyun move a box. They were both different. Sehun wasn’t sure that that was even them.

Chanri was smiling at a man who had an arm around her as they talked to a truck driver.

Yixing was carrying a crying baby into the house.

And there he was. On the same spot on the driveway the day he stopped Sehun on his bike and said, _“You smell weird.”_

The pain that washed over Sehun as he met Kai’s gaze from far amassed to all the emotional torture he had gone through alone all those years.

Kai.

No longer a boy. A man.

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

_love!mate!soul!_

Sehun wanted to move. He wanted to run into Kai’s arms and cry and kiss him. He wanted to break down and let go.

On that same driveway, Kai had left him ten years ago. With a lot of promises.

Kai didn’t look away. He was expressionless as his eyes bored into Sehun’s.

Sehun saw colours. So many ribbons colours after so many years. And they were bursting around Kai.

A young man with fiery red hair walked up to Kai then. He was all smiles, his eyes big and full. He took hold of Kai’s arm and clung onto it before he leaned in and pressed a kiss to Kai’s cheek. Then he said something to the taller man.

Noah.

Kai looked away from Sehun at once and turned around, walking back toward the house.


	14. Chapter 14

_“You know,”_ Sehun called back at Kai, who was catching up with him fast. _“You don’t have to follow me everywhere just because we’re friends now.”_

 _“I was bored at home. I had nothing to do,”_ Kai said, pedalling harder.

 _“Liar,”_ Sehun muttered, but he doubted Kai heard it. How would Kai ever get bored at home when he had all the state-of-the-art gadgets and doodads at home? All that Sehun had was an old TV.

As they biked through the narrow alleyway, Sehun swerved to dodge a stray cat. Kai was not as good a biker as Sehun was. He pedalled slower, braked a lot and whined every time he saw a pothole in the road.

Geun drove the boy everywhere in their fancy cars. Sehun, on the other hand, biked everywhere. He took great pride in being able to go wherever he wanted on his own without depending on his parents, even though he was only twelve. Kai was just a spoiled boy, who had everyone catering to his every whim.

Sehun jerked to a stop and planted a foot down on the ground to look up at the rapidly greying sky. The fat, dark clouds looked like they were about to weep down on him any moment now.

 _“Why are we stopping?”_ Kai asked, almost breathless.

Sehun pointed up at the skies. _“I think it’s going to rain.”_

Kai gazed up and frowned. _“But… we haven’t got a chance to get the flowers for your mother.”_

Frowning, Sehun peeked into the tiny pocket of his shirt to make sure that the coins were still there. They were. He had saved all of his lunch money for the past two weeks so that he could buy his mother flowers for her birthday, which was tomorrow.

He didn’t want to go home without the flowers. He didn’t want his mother to think that he didn’t do anything for her birthday when he had starved himself at school every day for two weeks so that he could buy her something pretty, like daffodils, her favourite flower.

The rain drizzled down on his face.

 _“Why don’t we wait in the diner for the rain to stop?”_ Kai suggested.

Sehun nodded. That sounded like a good idea. The last thing he needed right now was to get drenched in the rain and have his mother scold him for the rest of the day.

They biked hurriedly to _Carlos’ Diner_ and parked their bikes before hurtling into the diner that was packed as it usual was in the afternoons.

Carlos waved at them when he saw them running into the diner to escape the rain that soon poured down without mercy. _“Hola, hola. Come in, boys!”_

Sehun smiled at the man while Kai searched the diner for a booth for them sit in. When he had, he excitedly tugged at the short sleeve of Sehun’s shirt. _“There,”_ he rasped.

As Sehun slid into his seat in the booth, Kai sat down beside him instead of across him. _“What are you doing? Sit over there,”_ Sehun grumbled.

 _“I…”_ Kai trailed off. Then with a sad frown, he climbed out of his seat and sat across Sehun.

 _“What can I get you boys today, then?”_ Carlos asked when he came over to their booth.

Sehun bit on his lower lip, lowering his head a little. _“We don’t have enough money, Mr. Ramirez,”_ he said then, fishing the coins out of his pocket to show Carlos. _“I want to buy my mother flowers for her birthday.”_ He grinned proudly.

 _“I have money,”_ Kai said, blinking his wide eyes.

Sehun blinked back. _“You do?”_

 _“Yes. We can order whatever we want.”_ He sounded so happy.

Sehun grimaced. _“No, thank you. I don’t want owe you.”_

_“But—”_

_“Don’t worry about it, papi,”_ Carlos said. _“It’s on the house. What do you want?”_

That was one of the nicest gestures Sehun had ever seen. He ordered a strawberry milkshake because he had been in the mood for it ever since he realized Kai had been smelling like strawberry shampoo earlier.

Kai ordered the same.

While they waited for their milkshake, Sehun quietly swung his legs, noticing how pink his knees were for the first time. They were small but so pink. He wondered if Kai’s were pink, too. He didn’t know because he had never seen Kai in shorts.

Well, there was that one time he had seen Kai in nothing…

He tried not to revisit that memory. He clasped his hands over his knees and glanced out the diner windows to watch the heavy downpour. It didn’t look like it was going to end anytime soon.

 _“Is strawberry milkshake your favourite kind of milkshake?”_ Kai asked suddenly. Sehun looked at him.

_“No. Chocolate is. Why?”_

That response made Kai grin. _“Mine, too!”_

_“Why did you order strawberry, then?”_

Kai fell silent, lowering his eyes.

Sehun let it go. _“Where do you come from?”_

 _“What do you mean? We’re neighbours,”_ Kai said.

_“I mean, before you moved here, where were you?”_

_“Oh”._ He took a pause. _“Kind of far away from here. We lived in Lonedale.”_

_“Did you have a lot of wolves there, too?”_

Kai nodded. _“It was one of our territories.”_

_“Territories? What are those?”_

_“It’s just… It’s hard to explain. My mother’s former pack owned it. So, after her father died, my dad took it.”_

_“Took it? You can’t just_ take _a place, can you?”_

Kai hesitated now. _“Well… My dad did.”_

_“Okay… But why are you here, then? Oakenbury isn’t your territory.”_

Kai fell silent again. And their milkshakes came to their table. He pretended to be busy with the straw.

The rain died before they were even done with their drink. They thanked Carlos more than once before they headed outside.

Sehun said, _“Jinkies”_ because their bikes were all wet now. They didn’t want to mount them and get their clothes wet. So, they walked their bikes to the florist.

Dana, who ran the store, greeted Sehun with a warm smile when she recognized him. Sehun used to tag along with his mother whenever she dropped by _Flowers and Pots_ for some flowers to put in the vase on the dining table.

 _“Sehun, wasn’t it?”_ she asked. Sehun grinned. Dana was a very pretty twenty-year-old. If he were only a little older, he was certain he’d marry her. _“How can I help you today?”_

Sehun glanced around the flower shop. _“I want to buy some daffodils,”_ he said shyly. _“Not for me. I don’t like flowers. I’m a man. Like my father. They’re for my mother.”_

 _“I see,”_ Dana chuckled.

Sehun quickly pulled out the coins and held them out to her. _“I have this much. Is it enough?”_

 _“Just,”_ she said and told him to wait there while she fetches the flowers.

When Sehun turned around to look at Kai, the boy was scowling at a bunch of roses.

 _“Why are you angry at them?”_ Sehun asked.

 _“What?”_ Kai glanced at him, the annoyance in his expression sliding away. _“I’m not… angry at them. I was just…”_

Sehun hated the boy for always never finishing his thought.

Kai licked his lips and scratched his head. _“My dad gives my mother roses all the time,”_ he muttered embarrassedly.

_“So?”_

Kai quickly shook his head. _“Nothing.”_

Dana returned with three yellow daffodils. She made them pretty for Sehun with a golden ribbon and a wrap. _“Here you go.”_

Accepting the flowers, Sehun handed her all of the coins he had saved. _“Thank you,”_ he whispered and smiled at the flowers.

 _“I would like to buy two of these,”_ Kai blurted out to the florist, pointing at the peach-coloured roses. _“F-For my mother, too.”_

Sehun waited while Kai bought his roses. They then started back home.

On his way, Sehun could not stop thinking about how happy his mother was going to be when she got the flowers tomorrow.

He held the daffodils in one hand and the handlebar in the other.

 _“It smells so good,”_ he heard Kai say, but he was no longer paying attention to the boy. He had come to an abrupt halt as his heart started to thunder in his chest, threatening to jump out of his chest. He gaped ahead at the road that was bestrewn with crawling _nyas_.

 _“What’s wrong?”_ Kai asked, stopping as well when he noticed Sehun had stopped.

Sehun started panting, gasping for air. _“Nyas,”_ he wheezed out.

Kai turned his head to scan the road. _“They must have come out after the rain. Don’t worry. They won’t do anything. We can jump on our bikes and squash them.”_

Sehun looked at Kai with teary eyes. _“I don’t want to squash them,”_ he whispered. _“Then I’d have their bodies sticking to my bike.”_

Kai stared at him, unblinking for a moment. _“We can’t just… stand here forever…”_

There must be at least hundreds of them. Sehun was close to passing out. He couldn’t breathe.

 _“Come on. Try to ignore them,”_ said Kai and took a step forward. Sehun tried to do as he said. He moved forward and heard a crunch. _“Oh, no!”_ Kai exclaimed. Sehun screamed and jumped, dropping both the flowers and the bike. _“You stepped on it! Its head is sticking to your shoe!”_

Sehun screamed for the whole street to hear before he broke into a vicious sob. _“I stepped on it?! I stepped on it?! I did?! Take it away! Take it away! Mommy!”_

Kai burst into a laughter before it died as soon as he realized Sehun was crying. _“Oh, my God. I’m kidding. No, no. You didn’t step on it.”_ He stood his bike and took hold of Sehun’s hand. _“It’s okay. I’m here. I’ll protect you. Okay? Don’t cry.”_

Sehun sniffled and wiped his eyes on the back of his hand while Kai picked up the flowers and bike from the wet road.

 _“Say what,”_ Kai then said. _“I’ll walk ahead of you and I’ll crush all the nyas in your way and you just follow me. Step wherever I step. Is that okay?”_

Sehun slowly nodded. As Kai advanced, he made sure his steps were slow and steady as he tried to step only where Kai stepped.

When they finally reached Kai’s driveway, Sehun jumped onto the grass where he could not see a _nya_.

 _“Are you all right?”_ Kai asked, frowning.

Sehun did not respond. He was mad that he had cried in front of Kai.

Kai swallowed and held out one of the two roses he was holding. Sehun cocked his eyebrows at it. _“It’s… for you.”_

Sehun didn’t know what to think except that it was the weirdest thing a boy could do. _“I’m not your mother,”_ he spat at Kai.

Kai withdrew the rose at once, looking shamefaced and upset. _“I was kidding about that, too. Sorry I made you cry today. I should go inside.”_ He held the roses to his chest and hurried into the house.

* * *

“This isn’t a motel, _mi_ _amigo_.”

Sehun cracked his eyes open and squinted at Baz, who was knocking on the countertop to wake him up.

Lifting his head, he rubbed his eyes on the hilt of his palms. “Yeah, sorry,” he drawled drowsily.

“You’ve been here since seven o’clock,” Baz said. “It’s almost ten. We’re gonna close soon. Time for you to head home, don’t you think?”

Sehun glanced the wall clock next to the old jukebox that was still playing old Mexican songs. “I can’t,” he muttered.

“Why?”

“I’m waiting for Taeyong.”

“He said he’s coming?” Baz asked, arching a bushy brow.

“Yeah. He’s probably just running a little late.” He ran a hand through his hair, realizing that his head was pounding lightly. “That and also the family that abandoned me ten years ago decided to move back to the house I spent most of my childhood in.”

Baz pressed his lips into a thin line.

Sehun snorted. “You knew?”

Baz shrugged. “I heard people talk about it earlier. I just… didn’t want to say anything because I know you and… Kai didn’t end on a good note.”

“Boy, isn’t that the understatement of the century.” Sehun groaned and rubbed his temples. Baz knew half of the story. All of the wolfish details were left out.

“How are you feeling, though?”

“You know what, it’s been years. He’s clearly over it. I should be, too.” He picked up the beer bottle and drained it. Baz frowned.

“You don’t look okay.”

“Well, I am. Okay. Just okay to everyone, am I not? That’s why I was left behind. I’m valueless.”

“Sehun—”

“I’m fine, Baz. Don’t worry about it. Just get me another beer.”

“You know this is not a bar and there’s one right across the street.”

“It’s always a pickup scene over there.”

Baz sighed and turned around to get him another bottle of beer.

“Hey, sorry I’m late,” Taeyong gasped as he burst through the door. “I was caught up at the faculty follies. So, what’s the big news? Why did you ask me to come see you immediately?”

“I told you that twelve hours ago,” Sehun said.

Taeyong shrugged. “Well, you’re not dead. So, what’s up? Did you take the job?”

“Not yet,” Sehun sighed and propped his forehead in his hand. “Haven’t you heard?”

“Heard what?”

The diner doorbell chimed.

“We’re almost closing!” Baz hollered at the people who had come in.

Sehun stilled. His body numbed into a trance.

The scents filled his senses and made his head spin.

“I said we’re closed, boys,” Baz said, now in a lower voice that trembled.

“Holy _fuck_ ,” Sehun heard Taeyong let out.

With his heart in his mouth, he dared himself to turn around and look at the Regnandis that had sauntered in.

“Well, you still have some customers in here. We’re just here to grab a bite and a drink and we’ll be on our way,” Yixing said gruffly without a smile.

Baz did not retort. He shoved his glasses up his nose and hung his head.

The four men moved to the counter where Sehun and Taeyong were seated at. Taeyong was as paralyzed as Sehun was.

Kai, clad in his leather jacket, wore his hair slightly long now and parted. He carded his finger through it as he walked toward Sehun. Yixing and Jaehyun at his sides looked nothing like the boys Sehun remembered. They were as much of a man as Kai was. Yixing had a weathered look about him; he looked exhausted. Jaehyun was sporting showy watch and shoes, dressed like he was the richest man in the world.

They were accompanied with the man Sehun had seen with Chanri in the morning.

“Hey, Sehun,” Yixing said, stopping before him.

_Hey, Sehun?_

Sehun thought he was dreaming. And he hoped it was just a dream because if the pain he was feeling in the pit of his stomach was real, he didn’t know how he’d deal with it. A sob was already clawing at the back of his throat.

Kai did not take his eyes off him.

“You must be Taeyong,” Jaehyun said, smirking. “I see puberty did you some good.”

Taeyong scowled. “Ditto, asshole,” he spat and shot up from the barstool. “Let’s get out of here, Sehun.”

Sehun did not move as he continued to wordlessly stare at Kai with his insides knotted up.

“You guys know them?” asked the guy Sehun didn’t know.

“Yeah,” Jaehyun said. “Remember when we told you about the… Aequus?”

The other guy’s eyes widened. “Oh, you’re _Sehun_ Sehun.”

Sehun needed air.

Kai was not looking away. But he just stood there, hands in the pockets of his jacket. The last time they had seen each other, Sehun was telling him to leave and never come back.

“Chanri got married last summer,” Yixing said to Sehun and Taeyong. “This is Don. Her husband.”

“Are you going to order something or are you just here to talk?” Baz asked. Even though he probably meant to sound rude, he didn’t. He was far too soft-spoken to sound even a tiny bit assertive.

Yixing pinned him with a glare.

Kai parted his lips as though he were about to say something, his eyes still on Sehun. But he was halted when Sehun stood up with a jolt and shoved past Taeyong to scurry out through the kitchen’s backdoor.

Failing to calm the pulsing blood in his temples, he crouched to the ground as soon as he was out in the cold night. He took large drafts of air in and panted.

Once he could breathe again, he rose to his full height again and scrubbed his face with his bare palms. He shouldn’t be feeling this way. He had ended everything with Kai. _He_ had ended them. He shouldn’t be the one feeling all this misery.

He heard the diner’s backdoor open behind him. He didn’t have to turn around to know that it was Kai.

His throat felt parched, his heart full of agony and anger. He balled his hands into fists at his sides and stared at the wall in front of him.

“Sehun,” he heard Kai say softly, grievingly.

It was enough to drive Sehun mad. He wanted to give in and turn around and fall into Kai’s arms. To tell him he had missed him and wanted to wash his body with the heat and scent of Kai’s skin. God knew how much he had missed it.

“Why?” he said instead, back still turned to Kai. “Why did you come back?”

Kai did not answer.

Sehun turned around at last, eyes red and bleary. He clenched his hands tighter. “Why?”

Kai advanced a step. Sehun withdrew one. Kai stopped for a brief moment, eyes dropping to Sehun’s gripped fists. Then he closed the rest of the distance between them until Sehun was pressed against the wall.

He pushed the sorrow and longing down and let the anger bubble in his chest instead as Kai closed in.

His fist flung up before he had a chance to think twice. Kai caught his wrist before the punch could land on a side of his face.

Gnashing his teeth, Sehun almost raised his other fist before he was held in place by Kai’s other hand that flew up to grip around his throat.

Sehun froze against the wall, chest heaving as Kai’s hand tightened around his neck and the underside of his jaw. He swallowed.

With one hand clutching at Sehun’s wrist and the other at his throat, Kai leaned in to the crook of Sehun’s neck. The bastard sniffed him, _inhaled_ him.

And as Kai’s skin brushed against his own, Sehun shut his eyes. His body was close to collapsing. He wanted to scream, but he knew better than to do that while he was being held down like this.

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Kai’s hand around Sehun’s neck moved to grip a side of Sehun’s jaw and face as he nuzzled his nose all over the neck, all the way up to Sehun’s cheek. When his lips lightly grazed the skin there, Sehun’s eyes rolled back and his free hand came up to wind around Kai’s jacket collar. He heard Kai growl softly into his ear.

His body almost arched into Kai’s.

He drew his eyes open and yanked his wrist free from Kai’s grip before shoving the wolf back with both hands. His fist struck Kai’s face.

“If you come near me again,” Sehun said, breathlessly while Kai rolled his jaw that was just welted. “I will kill you or die trying.”


	15. Chapter 15

After a long night of tear sheds, angry grumbles, and hurtful memories, Sehun had finally been able to get over the heat and smell of Kai’s scent that had overwhelmed his sense when he roused the following morning.

He took a thorough shower to scour off any remaining traces of Kai on him. He wanted to convince himself that it had all just been a risible dream. But he couldn’t. He knew what it was, and he knew it had all been _real_. After years of only thinking and dreaming of Kai, the man had finally been right before him in the flesh.

Sehun could forgive the abandonment. He could forgive the broken promises. But he could not forgive Kai for being the one who had dragged Sehun into all this mess, only to have him left behind. Sehun had not asked for any of this. He had not wanted to fall in love with Kai. He had not asked to be crushed. But Kai had done it all, anyway. And in the end, he left.

When he came back once in a freaking blue moon, he made it seem like he was only doing it to make sure he still kept Sehun on the hook. Now, he showed up out of nowhere with his entire family and all chummy with that Noah.

Sehun took that back. He could never forgive Kai for either the abandonment or the broken promises. He would rather watch the man burn.

He pulled on a sweater and grabbed his car keys.

On the porch, he kept his gaze away from the cabinlike house, even though the Alphas’ scents curled in the air like wood smoke.

* * *

Combing his hair neat with his fingers, he tried to make himself look presentable as he stood on the manor’s doorstep after ringing the doorbell.

He called Mrs. Bianchi earlier to let her know that he would not be coming in today. He hoped that and the drive all the way out here would be worth it.

The door was prised open and Sehun was momentarily alarmed by the scent before he saw Kali emerge through the doorway with half a smile.

“Decided to take me up on my offer?” he asked, crossing his arms over his thickly padded chest. Sehun watched the veins in his biceps protrude through the tan skin before he quickly raised his gaze to meet the icy blues.

“Good… morning, Mr… Kali.”

“Kali is just fine,” the man said and turned on his heel, leaving the door open to let Sehun in.

Sehun entered and followed the wolf to the drawing room.

“You can start today if you want,” Kali said as he filled a tumbler with some scotch from the liquor cart. “The servants will show you around the manor. It’s easy to get lost around here.”

“Wait,” Sehun blurted out. Kali stopped and looked up at him. “I do have some… terms.”

Kali cocked a thick eyebrow that was peppered with grey. “Name them, then.” He swigged the alcohol.

“I only work during the weekdays.”

“Why? Do you have interesting plans on weekends?”

Sehun rubbed the nape of his neck. He had no plans for any day. But he needed a couple of days to be holed up at home and to stay away from the outside world to recharge. “Well… no. But…”

Kali smiled. “Don’t worry about it. Just the weekdays is fine with me.” He picked up a sheet of paper from the sideboard. “This is your contract. You need only look after my son from ten in the morning until five in the evening.”

Sehun accepted the paper and perused the printed words. His eyes widened. “This is… a lot of money.”

“Well, you don’t take it with you when you go down in the ground,” Kali scoffed. “I want the best for my son. Which is why, if I will do really horrible things to those who try to hurt him.”

Sehun stared at the older, taller man for a moment. “Consider message received,” he muttered. “Where do I sign?”

Kali handed him a pen. Sehun signed the contract. “I will be honest, Sehun. I didn’t think you’d take the job.”

“Let’s just say I’ve had some motivation lately.” He held the paper and the pen back to Kali. “But just to be clear, this doesn’t mean I am in any of this Rexit business. I’m here as your son’s caregiver. Nothing more.”

Kali bowed his head curtly. “Welcome to the household then, Sehun.” With that, he started for the door.

“Wait… I’m not sure what the job… entails,” Sehun said embarrassedly. “What do I do? Should I feed him food? Do I have to… wipe… I mean, clean after he’s… you know?”

Kali looked a little amused. He grinned. “No. He can do all that by himself. You’re supposed to just make sure he’s fine and he’s not lonely. Be his friend.”

“I must be the world’s most expensive _friend._ ”

Kali shook his head, chuckling softly as he walked out of the drawing room before a servant entered and ordered Sehun to follow her. She was a Rexit, too. An Omega.

“This is the Young Master’s room,” she said, pointing Sehun toward the maroon door. “Should I tell him that you’re here to see him?”

“Uh, no. I can do that myself. Thank you.”

When she left him to it, Sehun took some breaths before he lifted a fist and knocked on the door. There was no response. He pushed the door open.

The boy was in his electric wheelchair, staring out the window of his elaborate bedroom. Sehun stood still for a moment before he closed the door behind him and advanced forward. He realized the disabled boy was gazing at the forest with a scowl on his lips.

“Hi, Jax,” Sehun said in a low voice. The boy pretended like he didn’t hear it as he glowered harder. “I’m not sure if you’d remember me. I’m… Sehun. I’m supposed to be your caregiver from now on.”

“You smell like goat cheese,” the boy spat, still keeping his eyes on the windows.

Sehun waited a few beats before saying, “I’m sorry?”

Jax turned his head and was now scowling at him. “You smell like _goat cheese._ And consider your first day as your last. I will tell my dad to get rid of you.”

“Uh…” He moved closer to the boy. “I get it. You don’t like me,” he said. “I mean, are you kidding me? I don’t like me either.”

Jax snorted. “I’m not surprised.” But then he stopped as his cheeks reddened lightly. “You don’t… like yourself? Why?”

Sehun sighed, leaning against the windowpane. “I’m broken. Nobody likes broken goods, do they?”

Jax frowned, lowering his eyes. “No, they don’t.” He curled his hands around his knees. “You don’t look all that broken, though.”

“I suppose I don’t,” Sehun said. “But I know I’m worthless. So, I totally get it if you don’t like me.”

Something twisted in the young boy’s face. “People don’t like me either.”

“Oh, really?” Sehun stood up straighter. “People are assholes, huh?”

Jax gasped. “You’re not supposed to say that word!” he whispered harshly. “My father said I should never say bad words.”

“All fathers say that.” Sehun shrugged. “But all fathers are hypocrites. I listened to everything my father said. And look at where I am now.”

The boy’s dark eyes twinkled. “That’s what I thought. My father swears all the time. It’s not fair that I don’t get to say it.”

Sehun smirked. “You can say it all you want with me.”

Jax blinked. “Really?”

“Really.”

Chewing on his lip for a moment, Jax looked like he was contemplating something hard. “Okay,” he said quietly after a while. “You are an… an… _asshole_ ,” he whispered the word out.

Sehun laughed. Jax laughed, too. “I see that you have a TV. What do you like to watch?”

The boy glanced back at the black screen. He shrugged. “Nothing. They’re all kids’ stuff.”

“Oh, kids’ stuff is horrible.”

“You don’t have to tell me,” Jax gasped. “Kids are the most annoying creatures!”

“I’m glad we agree, Jax.”

* * *

By the end of the day, Sehun was convinced Jax would not ask his father to fire him.  He made a note to make sure he’d bring along some fun games to play with Jax tomorrow to make the time pass faster.

When he came home that evening, he exited his _Prius_ to find his friends sitting on the porch steps, waiting on him.

Sehun’s legs almost froze when he spotted Sara between Baz and Taeyong. As much as he had missed her, he could not express it. He had gotten quite used to not expressing positive emotions.

Thanks to the boy who had made him feel all sorts of emotions when they were younger.

“Sara,” he said as she ran into his arms. “What are you doing in Oakenbury?”

“Oh, my God,” she panted, drawing back. Her hair was shorter than the last time Sehun had seen her. “I heard about what happened.”

Sehun glanced at Baz and Taeyong over Sara’s shoulder before facing her again. “And you came all the way down here?” he groaned. “I promise you, Sara. I’m fine. Please, don’t make this a huge deal.”

“It _is_ a huge deal!” She hurried after him as he brushed past her.

“You didn’t have to tell her,” he snapped at Taeyong before walking into his house.

“Like she wouldn’t see right through me?! She called me last night and—”

“How could she see through you via a phone call?” Sehun growled as the only three friends he had chased him into the house.

“I couldn’t believe it,” Sara said, almost gasping. “I had to come see it myself! And holy shit, you should have seen my face. It was horrified!”

“How did _you_ see your face to know that it was horrified?” Sehun asked, a brow raised as he tossed the keys to the coffee table.

Sara dodged the point altogether as she pulled Sehun into another hug. “You poor thing,” she mewled. “I can’t imagine how bad this must all be on you.”

“I told you, I’m fine,” he said, backing away. “You’re forgetting that _I_ broke up with him. I told him to stay away. Remember? I am more than fine. He’s clearly moved on and so have I.”

“Is that why your house smells like a garbage full of fishbones and banana peels?” Sara shot at him, folding her arms upon her chest. “And you look like a pickle that had grown a ruddy sprout on one end. Why do you smell like cheese?”

Sehun shuddered. “Did you come all the way here to smother and take a shot at me?”

“No, of course not,” she said. “I’m here to offer you my comfort.”

Sehun scoffed. “Yeah, you’re doing a marvellous job at it.” He rolled his eyes and turned around to make himself a cup of coffee. Baz stood at Taeyong’s side, completely silent as he watched Sara and Sehun snipe at each other. He always said that he never understood why friends would insult one another to show their affection.

“Look, Sehun,” Sara said as she put a hand on his back and lowered her voice, so that Baz wouldn’t hear. “Do you know why they moved back? Is it… wolf business? Or is it something else? Did you find out why?”

“Yeah. Because that fucking family and I are on such good terms that we share everything going on in our lives in a newsletter to each other on a weekly basis,” Sehun spat, gripping the counter’s edge.

“Okay, okay. Relax.” She rested her head on his shoulder momentarily. “God, you really do smell like cheese. Have you showered?”

Sehun shoved her away. “Yes. I showered this morning.”

Then her eyes widened. “Oh, God. You smell like…” She glanced back at Baz before turning to Sehun again. “Like when you did that one time… You know? You said you were horny all the time but didn’t know how to deal with it? Your heat cycle.”

“I didn’t smell like cheese back then.” Sehun scowled.

“Yes, you did. We just didn’t say anything.”

“What the fuck?”

“I mean, you probably smell great to the wolves and dogs. But God, you’re going into heat?”

“I’m not!” Sehun hissed. “Stop saying that. Like I’m some namby-pamby rabbit in a rut. And even if it’s another cycle, I can take care of myself.”

Sara huffed heavily. “Okay.” She took a step back. “What are you going to do about the whole Kai situation, then?”

“What did you two talk about last night?” Taeyong chimed in. “He went after you.”

Sehun swallowed hard. “We… didn’t talk.”

“He was gone for a long time.”

“You’re lying,” Sara told Sehun. “You do that with your eyes where you don’t look up when you’re lying.”

“I do that?”

“Yes. You’re a bad liar, which is such a disappointment to me. But come on. Spill. What did you and Kai talk about?”

“Nothing!” Sehun exclaimed. “He… He sniffed me.”

Sara, Taeyong and Baz looked at him with ridiculous looks on their faces.

“He... sniffed you?” Baz asked, looking more confused than the other two. “Is that normal ex-boyfriend behaviour?”

“Well, you’ll find out soon, won’t you?” Taeyong told him. Sehun wondered what that was supposed to mean. Baz was probably wondering the same because he looked even more confused now. Taeyong then came forward and whispered, “I might be wrong, but I saw someone look at our little _papi_ with the ‘put-your-jack-up-my-butthole-and-make-me-your-slut’ look last night.”

“What?!” Sara gasped.

“What?” Baz asked, frowning behind his spectacles.

“I mean, whatever the opposite of that look is,” Taeyong said. “The ‘I-want-to-put-my-jack-up-your-butthole-and-make-you-my-slut’ look. The look that abs-hoe Jaehyun walks around with pridefully, who by the way, has not changed one bit.”

“Who?” Sara demanded.

“Yixing,” Taeyong whispered.

“What are you guys talking about?” Baz walked over to them.

“Nothing,” Taeyong mumbled.

“Can we come back to Sehun’s problem first?” Sara said. “I’m sure you’re wrong, Taeyong.”

“I might be. Anyway, to help Sehun’s case, I did some digging this morning,” Taeyong said. “I asked around and apparently no one knows why they are back. But people are generally very observant in Oakenbury and you know how this place is lousy with gossip. Yixing has a year-old baby. No wife. Chanri is married to Don, the new guy. So, she must have dumped her old boyfriend. No one has seen Geun. And uh, the ginger is nosy. He talks to every neighbour, waters plants, and likes having his breakfast out on the porch.”

“He’s with him,” Sehun muttered, turning to the coffeemaker.

“Who’s with whom?” Sara asked.

“It’s Noah,” he sighed. “I know him. And I saw him getting all palsy-walsy with Kai yesterday.”

“Ew. Getting his hands on another guy’s man? Not cool,” Sara spat.

“He’s _not_ my man!” Sehun shot at her. “Now, will you all just stop this already? I couldn’t care less about Kai and his family if I tried.”

“Yes, you can,” said Sara. “You totally can. You know what we should do?”

“I don’t think a makeover is going to help, Sar—”

“I was going to suggest a spring cleaning. We clear out the house and the treehouse. I’m assuming you’re still keeping it. And then maybe we’ll give you a makeover.”

* * *

As much as Sehun had disagreed to it, he found himself hurling out the contents of the treehouse down on the backyard. Sara was right. It did feel great to get rid of all these things that still reminded him of his days with Kai.

Baz and Sara helped him in the treehouse while Taeyong gathered the things tossed out on a corner of the backyard.

“Do you want these?” Baz asked as he took the polaroid pictures from the wall.

Sehun stopped in his tracks for a minute to stare at the photographs in Baz’s hands. “I…” he let out, recalling all the beautiful memories that led them to taking those pictures.

Sara then whispered into his ear. “Psst. He broke your heart.”

Sehun groaned. “You’re right. I don’t need them. Toss them out.”

“What about this?” said Baz. Sehun looked back at him and his heart dropped to his stomach.

“Mr. Giraffe,” he let out, taking the stuffed animal from Baz’s hands. He brushed the dust off Mr. Giraffe and looked at it forlornly. “Actually, I’ll keep this one.”

They managed to get rid of most of the things in the treehouse, save the baby blanket, the photo of his parents he had framed, and Mr. Giraffe.

As the final piece, Sehun threw Kai’s hoodie onto the top of the pile when he climbed down the rope ladder.

“Now, let’s burn it,” Sara said.

“Whoa, easy there, _Gitmo_ ,” Taeyong stopped her. “You burn that, we’ll have the fire department on our asses within minutes. Put them on the sidewalk. The garbage man will take it out of our hands.”

Sara turned to Sehun with a smile. “How did that feel?”

Sehun managed a smile. “Honestly? Good.”

“Now, how would you feel about a haircut?”

“It’s too late for that.”

“Okay, fine. Tomorrow then. I will be here first thing in the morning and we’re going shopping.”

“I can’t. I have work.”

“Ditch it. Mrs. Bianchi will be more than happy when she finds out I’m puffing life back into your zombie-stench body.”

“You are a dream, you know?” Sehun groaned. “No, I don’t work for Mrs. Bianchi anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

Sehun looked at Taeyong and Baz. “You took the job?” Taeyong gasped.

“What job?”

* * *

Sara was not happy about Sehun working for Kali. She said that she thought the guy were bad news and that he had something nasty up his sleeve. But Sehun tried to appease her by agreeing to get a haircut with her two days later after he was done with Jax.

The last two days, Sehun brought board games to keep Jax entertained. The boy told him that he never got to play board games because how could he when he was the only one playing… And his father was too busy to play with him.

They also watched a movie. Not any of those kids’ stuff. A real adult film. _Jurassic Park._ Instead of paying attention to the movie, he let himself be lost down a memory lane.

Jax said he wasn’t scared after the movie was over. “My father would protect me from a t-rex,” he said proudly.

Sehun believed the same when he was a kid. That his father would protect him. That Geun would protect him. And Kai.

Jax was not ready to be Sehun’s friend yet. But he said he would consider it.

On his third day working there, Jax wanted a glass of cranberry juice before they could watch the movie. They were going to see _Mission Impossible._ And Jax was thrilled.

“I’ll get it for you,” Sehun said, realizing he was growing a little thirsty himself. “I need some water, anyway.”

“Whatever,” Jax said.

On his way to the kitchen, he stopped in the hallway when he heard the front door open without a doorbell.

“Kali!” he heard a woman yip.

“This is unbelievable!” a man added.

“Kali, where are you?!” screeched another man. “Wait.” He halted his two companions and sniffed the air. “You smell that?”

“Yeah,” the black-skinned woman said. “Something new.”

“Aequus.”

Sehun swallowed and had half the heart to turn around and run away. They were Rexits. Betas. Even the woman. And they all looked like they had come from the bad side of town.

“Quit your yammering,” Kali growled, and his voice carried across the hall. The three Rexits turned their attention to the Alpha. “You better have a good reason for causing a ruckus.”

“Oh, yeah, we do,” said the woman, whipping the dreadlocks off her shoulders. The other two men stood on her sides. “You heard about those Regnandis back in town?”

Kali did not answer her question.

“Jack saw them,” she spat, looking to the giant man on her left who was sporting a thick beard, tattoos all over his arms and a thick septum nose ring. He reminded Sehun of a mad bull. And he also wondered if the nose ring would stay on when the man shifted, because that would be a hilarious image.

“They’ve been quiet,” the other man, not Jack, said. “Did you know anything about this?”

Kali rubbed his forehead. “Yes, I did.”

“And you did nothing?” the woman yapped. “They’re running in our forests again. _Ours._ Our territory.”

“You stand down, you hear me?” Kali said, his voice sounding like a command on its own. The other Rexits did not cower, however, despite being Betas. Well, that was how Rexits rolled, Sehun supposed. They were outlaws. They feared nobody. But why were they here? At Kali’s?

“And you tell everyone else to not to do anything,” Kali added. “Until I figure out why they’re back. Do you understand, Maza?”

“We already knew why they’re here,” the woman, Maza, spat before she looked down the hallway. She was no Alpha, but she definitely looked powerful enough to be one. Not to mention she was gorgeous. “And can you tell whatever that’s stinking like a dead body back there to come out.”

Kali sighed heavily as Sehun slowly stepped from his hideout that wasn’t much of a hideout.

“What are you talking about? He smells _great_ ,” Jack whispered to Maza with a sly smirk that made Sehun uncomfortable.

“Hold it in your pants, bozo,” she snapped at him. “It’s an Omega.”

“So?”

Sehun cleared his throat as he stopped at Kali’s side. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to overhear.”

“You mean, eavesdrop,” Maza said.

Sehun gulped.

“It’s okay, Sehun,” said Kali. “This is my son’s caregiver. So, Jack, I suggest you keep your paws off this one if you don’t want me to chop them off, understood?”

Jack winked at Sehun. God, he looked like a monster. When Sehun looked to the other guy, whose name he had yet to learn, the man was also staring at him like he was a platter of meat. Sehun shivered.

“I was just getting Jax some juice,” Sehun blurted out and excused himself, hurrying to the kitchen.

“You two, knock it off,” Kali ordered the men with Maza.

They were talking about Kai and his family, Sehun understood that much. But what did they mean this was _their_ territory? It wasn’t. It was Kai’s father’s. Kai told him that when they were young.

* * *

Sara had been right. He was nearing his heat cycle. Which meant a week of hell. It didn’t happen often. And it didn’t have a pattern. It came and went as it pleased, and it drove Sehun crazy. But the last one he had had was some four months ago.

The discomfort that overcame his body during that period was indescribable. He’d have sleepless, lonely nights, longing for someone’s touch. He was a descendant of a wolf after all. Without a pack or a family, he was sure he was bound to lose his sanity eventually.

When he reached home, he took a cold bath and heated up some store-bought mac-and-cheese. While it heated in the microwave, he glanced out the kitchen window. Sara said she would come see him tomorrow before she’d have to leave Oakenbury again.

She gave him many advices yesterday. Most of which ended in, _“Fuck him”._

The doorbell rang. Sehun’s eyes narrowed. He was not expecting anyone tonight…

Leaving the food in the microwave oven, he went to get the door. He paused on his way as he caught the scent.

His breathing quickened at once. He shuddered when a fist pounded on the door angrily.

The last time he had had the scent at his home, he was breaking up with Kai brutally.

He shakily unlocked the door and opened it.

Kai barged in, forcing Sehun to stagger back a few steps. He looked furious, but not furious enough for his eyes to turn red or for his fangs to show.

And Sehun fought the urge to throw himself onto the man and cry onto his shoulder.

“You’re working for a _Rexit_?!” The words came out of Kai’s mouth like venom. His hands were fisted at his sides, his teeth clenched, and nostrils flaring. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?!”

Sehun was put at a loss. He stiffened, mouth hanging open, completely flummoxed. “What… the hell am _I_ doing?” he breathed out, panting laboriously.

Kai stepped even closer.


	16. Chapter 16

The bench in the forest became their wonted rendezvous spot apart from the treehouse. Sehun could not risk having Kai over during the day. The other day, his father had already warned him, saying, _“I know you’ve been having him over in your little nest almost every night. If I catch him sneaking up there one day…”_ He hadn’t finished the threat, but Sehun figured it was not a very cheery ending.

And during the weekends when they had no school, it was difficult to see Kai around. Especially when he was out running with his pack. So, Sehun waited on the bench, feet brought up, knees hugged to his chest. He had a little gift for Kai today. And he was nervous about it.

 _“Hey,”_ Kai cawed when he finally showed up with a big smile. _“Sorry, I’m late. My mom was asking me to do a bunch of stuff for her.”_ He gave Sehun’s eager lips a gentle kiss before he took his seat on the bench beside Sehun. They had gotten quite good at this whole kissing thing. At first, it was awkward and embarrassing. But now, they kissed every chance they scored. Like real boyfriends. Like the grownups.

 _“It’s okay,”_ Sehun muttered, shifting in his seat so that he was facing Kai. _“Happy birthday.”_

Kai smiled wider. _“Thank you. You will be coming for dinner later tonight, right?”_

Sehun nodded. _“I wouldn’t dare miss it.”_ He snuck a hand behind him and took hold of the messily wrapped box. Ever since Kai had matured as an Alpha, it had been tough to be around him without falling into his lap or arms.

 _“Oh! I have something to show you,”_ Kai said with excitement. Sehun held the box he had behind him _. “Check this out.”_ The wolf pulled out a shiny polaroid camera from the pocket of his hoodie. _“Chanri gave me this.”_

_“Wow,” Sehun said, staring at the fancy thing. “I’ve only seen those in movies.”_

_“Yeah. It’s awesome.”_ He drew back and brought the camera up before clicking a picture of Sehun, who blinked at the flash before he frowned at the film that slid out through the slit in the camera.

 _“What else did you get?”_ he asked Kai miserably.

 _“Well, Yixing said he’d give me his present later tonight. I’m pretty sure my dad’s gift is letting me drive his car once in a while.”_ He laughed as he waited for the picture to develop. He looked happy. _“I got some new clothes. That belt I asked for. And my mom gave me a watch.”_

_“Where is it?”_

_“I’m not wearing it. I’ll wear it tonight.”_

Sehun lowered his head. He loved birthdays. He loved his own birthdays, his friends’ birthdays, everybody’s birthday. He usually got a new shirt, maybe some new shoes some years, and a birthday cake his mom baked. At night, when his dad was back from work, they’d sing him a happy birthday song and they’d kiss his cheeks for good luck. And he loved all of that. They made him very happy. But he figured this was what rich people’s birthday meant. Big, extravagant presents, a fancy dinner at night, cakes bought from the bakery. And he was happy for Kai for all that, too.

But the gift he had for Kai was not even half as good as the presents he had already received.

A part of him wanted to crumple the box and lob it across the forest before Kai found out. But another part of him knew he’d be upset about it because he had spent an entire week carving that wolf head with his father’s guidance. It had left blisters on his fingers. He had carved thirteen wolf heads just to get the perfect one. It came out smaller than he had imagined. So, he had his father’s help to link it to a leather strip in order to turn it into a locket made of wood. He should have known better. Kai wore all the expensive clothes, shoes, watches. Why would he go around with a gimcrack, tacky little wolf head around his neck…? And even if he did, he’d only do it to make Sehun happy.

But Kai did so much for him. This one time, Sehun wanted to be the romantic one and give his boyfriend something he could not buy. Now, he wasn’t sure if it were such a great idea to begin with.

 _“Look,”_ Kai rasped, holding out the photograph. _“It’s beautiful.”_

Sehun grimaced at the sad face in the picture. Well, it wasn’t fair that he pulled a long face on Kai’s birthday just because he couldn’t come up with a good idea for a gift. So, he pulled on a smile and said, _“Can I keep this one?”_

 _“No,”_ Kai said. _“I want it.”_ He held the photograph to his chest and smiled. _“It’s my first picture.”_ That warmed Sehun’s heart. _“But we can take more pictures.”_ He scooted closer and pressed a side of his face to Sehun’s before he clicked another photograph of them. Sehun smiled in this one. Kai gave it to him after it had developed. They took one more with Kai kissing Sehun’s cheek. It was Sehun’s to keep, too.

When the skies turned grey, they realized it was time for them to head home. Kai rose from the bench and stuffed the camera back into his hoodie’s pocket.

 _“So, see you later?”_ he said.

Sehun bit on his lower lip for a second before he stood up. _“Kai,”_ he whispered. _“I got you a present, too.”_

Kai went stiff, except for his eyes, which ballooned. _“What?”_

Sehun’s cheeks burned as he brought the box to the front and held it out in both hands. _“It’s nothing… big or fancy.”_

 _But I had made it myself for you._ He left that part out. It sounded too corny.

Kai took the box from his hands and unwrapped it gently, as though he did not want to hurt the sloppy wrapping job.

 _“You should just rip it open,”_ Sehun said.

Kai scowled at him then. _“I’m not going to rip something you made open, Sehun.”_

Sehun held his hands together at his front and dropped his gaze to the forest floor while Kai carefully unwrapped the box. Once he was finally done, he plunged the wrapping paper into his hoodie’s pocket and stared at the little grey box. Sehun had messily scrawled a _‘to Kai’_ on top of it.

Kai was beaming like the sun on the hottest day of summer as he opened the box. The smile faltered. Sehun wanted to take the box back and bury it.

He took the carving out of the box and eyeballed it for a whole minute, running his thumb over the wolf’s snoot that had taken Sehun ages to perfect.

 _“I… carved it,”_ Sehun murmured. _“I hope you like it.”_

Kai’s eyes lifted. He dropped the box to the ground, holding the locket in his hand, before he lurched forward and grabbed Sehun’s face. That was the first time Kai had ever kissed him so passionately. Sehun was taken aback, frozen to the ground, unsure of how to kiss his frenzied boyfriend back while Kai was kissing him all tongue and teeth. He even felt Kai’s fangs graze his lips as a low growl rumbled from Kai’s chest.

* * *

“Stop right there, Kai,” Sehun croaked out, holding a hand up. Kai halted, but he was still snarling like an animal ready to pounce. “G-Get out.”

“What do you think you’re doing?!” Kai spat.

Sehun was, if he were being entirely honest, a little frightened of how angry Kai was. Kai was an Alpha after all. But he did not seem half as angry as he had been when he showed up on Sehun’s doorstep some five years ago.

“You’ve known all your life about what these fucking Rexits are!” roared Kai, taking another step forward. “What monsters they are! And you are _working_ for one of them now?! Are you asking to get hurt?!”

“Monsters?!” Sehun shouted back, finally losing his patience. “Hurt? They aren’t as monstrous as you and your entire family were when you left me behind! You said you’d come back, but you didn’t! Am I asking to get hurt? Do you think I could be any more hurt than I already have been by _you_?! I was starting to get over you! And then you just show up here again?! With your family!”

Kai was fuming now. “So, what?” he snapped. “You’re just trying to get back at me? Is that what this is about? You’re siding with the Rexits now? The goddamn outcasts?!”

“I’m the biggest outcast of them all, Kai!” Sehun shrieked. “No.” He shook his head. “You don’t get to barge into my home and tell me who the monsters are. You have neither the right nor the reason for it! Get out.” He stepped forward to bring his hands up to Kai’s chest to shove back.

Kai caught hold of Sehun’s wrists. “They killed your parents. And they killed my father. Is that reason enough for you?” He released the wrists harshly.

Sehun stopped, arms turning limp, knees turning into water.

For a while, the world deadened around him. A familiar numbness returned to him as his ears rang. His raspy breaths came out in a rush as he watched Kai turn around and pace the room with his hand scrubbed his jaw. He then stopped before Sehun again with glistening eyes.

“Geun’s,” Sehun began again in a weak murmur with a sob choking his windpipe. “dead?”

Kai looked like he was fighting his own tears, grinding his teeth. “Last year,” he said lifelessly.

Sehun sniffled and averted his gaze to blink the tears in his eyes away. He had hated the man so much. But he didn’t want Geun hurt. He had hoped to hurt many of them, but now he realized, he hadn’t meant any of it.

“I’m… sorry,” he told Kai, despite their differences. Kai only stared back at him. Sehun recognized the boy in Kai’s eyes again. The same boy who trod behind his father, hoping that one day, he’d be just like his dad. Geun had been Kai’s world, even if he never said it out loud. Every son’s first hero was their father, anyway.

“They killed him. Ripped him apart,” Kai let out, tears welling up in his eyes. Sehun closed the distance between them to put his arms around Kai.

It did not take Kai any effort to let his head fall against Sehun’s shoulder as one of his hands slid over the small of Sehun’s back while the other curled around Sehun’s nape. “I’m sorry,” Sehun whispered again.

They stayed like that for long. He let Kai suck him in, hold him against his body, chest against chest, heart against heart. He felt warm tears seep into his shirt by the shoulder. Then he felt them against his neck when Kai raised his head just a little to rub his face against Sehun’s skin. His hand moved from the nape to cup the back of Sehun’s head. Sehun clutched at Kai’s leather jacket, clenching his teeth hard as Kai’s cheek rubbed against his jaw.

Then it was gone. Kai withdrew with a jolt and wiped his face. “You can’t do this with a Rexit, Sehun,” he then said through his teeth.

Sehun scowled. “Look. I’m sorry about what happened to Geun. But what I do with _my_ life no longer concerns you. We are no one to each other. I don’t have to listen to anything you have to say.”

“Sehun—”

“You left, Kai. Why do you keep coming back?!”

Kai lost it then. “Did it ever occur to you _once_ how difficult it must have been for me to leave you?!” he yapped, his voice thundering around the house. “Did you think that I didn’t try to stay?! That I didn’t try to take you with us?! I was every bit of a _child_ you were! What could I have done?! Did you think I didn’t try all those years to come back to you?! If we had stayed, you would have been shredded into pieces like your parents were! Did you think I would have went on living after that?!” His eyes were red now. Like his wolf’s. “I fought my father! I was close to ripping his throat out! I almost killed my brothers when they tried to stop me! And my father took everything I gave to him! Because he felt just as bad for leaving you behind! But what could we do?! You weren’t a Regnandi! I would have had to become a Rexit for you! And I almost did.” He advanced a step. “I walked away from my pack before I came to see you that night. But you made it clear that you didn’t want me anymore. I knelt out there on your porch and cried, howled, screamed before I shifted and ran like a mad wolf in the woods! When I went back to my pack years later, the other Regnandis wouldn’t take me. My father stepped down for me and took my place so that I could be with the pack again. And did you know what those Rexits did when he became one of them? They left him dead and in pieces in the woods.”

Sehun didn’t realize tears were streaking his face until Kai stopped to take a breath.

He then shook his head and turned around to walk out of the house. He paused at the door. “My heart and soul will always be yours, Sehun,” he said without looking back. “They have been since the first day I saw you as a child. Even if we’re not together. Even if you have erased me from yours.” With that, he strutted out and Sehun heard him shift before he heard Kai’s song, _love!love!love!_


	17. Chapter 17

“Do you have to just sit there and stare at the floor?”

Sehun lifted his head to look at the boy on the bed, who had averted his attention from the TV to the sulking, frowning, distracted Aequus in his room. Jax pinned him with a harsh look.

“You can just go if you’re going to just do nothing. I don’t need a watchman.”

Sehun sighed and rose from the chaise lounge before walking over to a side of the bed. “I’m sorry,” he said to the scowling boy. “I just… have something on my mind.”

“My father isn’t paying you to ‘ _have something on your mind’_ ,” the boy spat, hands gripping the duvet that was covering his legs.

“No,” Sehun said. “I suppose not.”

The kid looked furious as he returned his eyes back to the TV. “Watch this with me.”

Huffing a big breath, Sehun turned to the sofa by the bedside table.

“No, wait,” Jax said. “Before that, you should get us some snacks. I’m hungry.”

Sehun was, too. But he hadn’t packed any lunch for him today. He hadn’t slept all night. His eyes were burning, aching almost. There was a subtle pounding in his temples, and his chest never stopped feeling tight with misery ever since Kai left his house last night. He had sat on the couch and stared at the wall until the sun came up to mock his lightless life.

Kai’s words and his song were still echoing in his head, tugging at his heartstrings. And his hands wouldn’t stop trembling.

_My heart and soul will always be yours, Sehun… Even if you have erased me from yours…_

“All right,” he told Jax and wended his way out of the room. On his way to the kitchen, he was once more lost in the recollection of the events of the previous night. Years ago, Sehun had promised himself that he would no longer let anyone concerning Kai or his family unnerve him. They were all traitors and beasts. Liars and selfish. But he hadn’t heard their side of the story. Not until last night.

Even then, he didn’t know if he had the mercy in his cold heart to forgive Kai. He knew he didn’t want to, but he just couldn’t find the reason for it.

Rexits had killed his parents and Geun and many other innocents. Yet, here Sehun was, working for one of them just to spite the man he once loved.

And in a way, it had worked, hadn’t it?

He found a new jar of cranberry juice in the refrigerator after raiding the pantry for snacks.

“Is that for Jax?” came a voice from behind. Sehun had been so distracted that he had not noticed Kali’s scent. He jumped with a start and turned around as the jar slipped from his shaky, cold hands and shattered against the floor.

“Oh, my God,” Sehun gasped and crouched to pick up the broken shards of glass.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Kali said before he caught Sehun’s shoulders and pulled him up. “Leave it. The servants will clean it up.”

Sehun took a step back from the man. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay. We’ve all had butterfingers,” the older man said with a gentle smile. Sehun knew within seconds that smile could turn into the most vicious of snarls. He lowered his head as Kali walked around the kitchen island and fetched a towel. “You okay? You look a little fraught.”

Sehun stilled as Kali lifted his hands and started wiping the juice staining his fingers with the towel. He would have told the man to stop had he not been so shaken up.

“Wow, you’re really shaking,” Kali said, sliding the towel over the back of Sehun’s hands. He was shaking. But that might also be because of the approaching heat cycle.

Sehun eventually pulled his hands back and said, “Can I ask you something?”

Kali tossed the towel onto the island and crossed his arms over his chest. His greying eyebrows furrowed. “What is it?”

Sehun swallowed before speaking. “How… do you… know the Regnandi?”

Kali’s slightly weathered blue eyes narrowed. “Every wolf knows the Regnandi.”

“No. I mean… Geun’s family that just moved back into town. I heard your… friends mention them yesterday.” He took a breath before continuing. “And… they said it’s… _your_ territory. But Geun and his family were here a decade ago. Rexits have… attacked the innocents time and again. The Regnandis were the ones protecting their territories.”

Kali nodded his head considerately as he turned around and filled a glass with some tap water. “You hold such high regards for these Regnandis. Of course, they were like your family, weren’t they?” He faced Sehun again, taking a sip of the water. Sehun stared at him. “This… Geun you speak of. And his family. You grew up with them. And they disappeared only a few days after your parents perished in so-called car crash followed by a wild-animal attack. If these Regnandis were your family, why’d they leave you behind?”

Sehun was motionless.

Kali smirked. “You think I’d just hire _anyone_ without doing a thorough background check and having them vetted completely? I know who you are, Sehun. I know what you’ve been. Do you have an answer for my question? Why did this Regnandi family of yours leave you behind?” When Sehun did not reply, Kali said, “I’m sure you have conjured up your own set of beliefs about them. Now, let me affirm them.” He set the glass down before straightening up. “They left you behind because at the end of the day, the Regnandis take care of their own first. Their packs are elite packs. Pure-blooded wolves with no traces of taint. They’re pedigrees. Strongest, most powerful, and even their songs are heard by mere non-shifters. And they are only as strong as their pack. They may rub shoulders with Aequuses and humans, but they’re the _crème de la crème_. You can’t touch them for too long.”

His hard expression softened before he proceeded.

“They forbid breeding with anyone out of their own echelon to prevent half-breeds. They forbid mating with anyone out of their echelon because it would encourage others to do the same. And before you know it, their pedigree status is tainted.”

“I’m aware of all that,” Sehun croaked out weakly.

Kali bowed his head. “Rules are rules, right? Without all these rules, there’d be no order. You say Rexits killed so many innocents. I was a Regnandi once. Eleven years ago. And let me tell you, the amount of innocent blood on the Regnandis’ hands is no way near the amount the Rexits have on theirs.”

Sehun watched Kali’s blue eyes flash gold for a split of a second. “What… do you mean?”

The man lowered his head, his breathing quickening. “Do you know why Jax is like that? What made him… like that?” He looked up. “I fell in love. With an Aequus.” Sehun felt his heart skip a beat. “And _they_ were an androgyne. They didn’t go by male or female but… they were beautiful. And I loved them.” He smiled like he was smiling at a distant, fond memory. “And they loved me so much. They even… had this little cute nest for us both. And after Jax was born, I… I didn’t want to live a lie anymore. I was in love and I wanted to fight for that love.” His eyes hardened again. “But I was banished from my pack when I got discovered. And the Regnandis were coming for my Jax and… _Robin._ My Robin.” He looked away to hide the tears that were taking form in his eyes. “So, we decided to run far away. We didn’t get too far. I saved Jax but… his back was hurt. He was only a baby… but Robin… I couldn’t save them.”

When Sehun could finally talk and move again, he stepped forward and said, “Kali… I am… so… sorry about that.”

Shaking his head as though in disappointment, Kali said, “All of these Rexits were the doing of the Regnandis. If you believe they’re the good guys, you’re in for quite the surprise, Sehun.” He sighed and retreated. “As Rexits, we are free to choose. But a pack is what makes a wolf. Without it, we’ve forever lost a part of ourselves. But I don’t regret leaving mine. I did it for love. But I shouldn’t have.”

Sehun tried to hide his own tears now.

“If I hadn’t, Robin would be alive.” With that, Kali turned and left the kitchen.

* * *

“Okay, I get what you’re doing here,” Taeyong commented as they walked up the dirt driveway as the sun set lower in the horizon. “I just don’t get what _I’m_ doing here.”

“You’re my emotional support and moral compass,” Sehun told him. His heart was thundering in his throat as an onslaught of memories jetted into his mind with every step he printed on the loam that he used to call home. He hadn’t come up here since the day Kai and his family had left him and Mr. Giraffe on it.

“Sara should have stayed a day longer,” groaned Taeyong. “Dude, I don’t want to see these people. Is it not good enough that I’m keeping their secret? Why must I also pretend like I care about them?”

“Geun died, Taeyong,” Sehun said. “Hana must be grieving. Don’t you want to at least offer her your condolences.”

Taeyong pursed his lips for a moment as they climbed up the porch steps. The wolves in that house would have known Sehun was at their doorstep by now. “Fine, you’re right,” Taeyong muttered. “I did like Hana.”

Sehun stood before the wooden door. He remembered the time he could not reach the doorbell and would have knock on the door. He remembered all the time Kai had gotten the door with a silly, lovesick grin on his face.

The door swung open before he pressed the doorbell.

A red-haired, freckled, baffled, pale-skinned boy held the door open and blinked at Sehun and Taeyong with his big green eyes.

Sehun cleared his throat.

Noah made a disgusted face. “You,” he said. “What are you doing here?”

Sehun wanted to ask the same question. And punch the little twat in the face. Then throw him in the dirt and wrestle him. And then break one of his scraggly little arms. He might be a shifter, but Sehun was still bigger than he was.

“I’m here to see Hana,” Sehun said civilly instead.

“Why?” Noah asked annoyedly.

“We’ll tell Hana why,” Taeyong said.

Noah turned his stink eye to Taeyong. “And who are you?”

“I’m that one human who gets dragged into all that supernatural hokum.” Taeyong grinned a vexed smile.

“Noah, step aside,” said a voice from inside.

“Thing one and thing two are here,” the redhead said before stepping aside, rolling his eyes, to let Jaehyun come through.

“Well, well, well,” Jaehyun chimed with a smirk, leaning an arm against the doorjamb. “If it ain’t Sehun and Taeyong the Scuppernong.”

“I don’t know what that means, you dipstick,” Taeyong grumbled under his breath, turning his face away.

“Jaehyun,” Sehun said, drawing in a deep breath. “We… heard about what happened with… your father. We’re here to… give our condolences.”

Jaehyun snickered. “Why would you?” he asked, running a hand through his hair. “You hate us.”

“Whose fault is that?” Taeyong scoffed.

“I feel like you’re implying ours, but I really don’t see it?”

“I see you’re still the halfwit, vainglorious, self-loving prick you are.”

Jaehyun smirked again. “Yeah. True. But I’ve been told I’m legendary in bed now. I’m like a horse.”

“Or a part of a horse,” Taeyong countered.

“Taeyong,” Sehun chided him softly before turning to Jaehyun again. “Look. If you don’t want to let us in, then fine.”

“Jaehyun, Noah.” Sehun heard Hana’s voice and he swore his heart almost fell out of his chest. It was still as he remembered. Soft, tender, loving. He wanted to shove past Jaehyun and wrap himself around her.

Then she showed herself beside her son. There were greys in her hair now. But she didn’t look a day older than the last time Sehun had seen her. Maybe his memories were just distorted.

Hana smiled. Sehun almost broke down. “Sehun,” she said. “Taeyong. Come inside.”

It took him some courage to enter the house again. While Jaehyun was simpering at Taeyong, Noah glowered angrily at Sehun.

“Sit,” Hana said. “I’ll bring you something to drink.”

Sehun wanted to stop her and hug her. He wanted to tell her how sorry he was about Geun. She must have been devastated. First, she had lost her son who had left the pack willingly. Then she lost her husband. Did she also feel bad about leaving Sehun behind? If she did, would that change anything for Sehun?

“Ow!” Taeyong screeched at his back and he turned around to see Taeyong clutching his butt, spinning around to glare at Jaehyun, who started whistling a tune as he sauntered into the hallway, rubbing the back of his head. “He slapped my butt!” Taeyong hissed to Sehun quietly. “This is why I didn’t want to come here! It’s like high school all over again! Except that this is harassment and I’m going to sue his pompous fucking ass!”

“Taeyong, please. If you didn’t like it, slap him back,” Sehun said. “If you had just done it back then, he wouldn’t have gotten so rowdy with you now.”

Taeyong nodded then. “You’re right. That’s exactly what I should do. Wait here.” He patted on Sehun’s shoulder and wandered into the same hallway Jaehyun had disappeared into.

Left alone with Noah, Sehun looked at the youthful boy, who was scowling menacingly at him. “Do you have something to say to me?” Sehun asked.

Noah stepped forward. “As a matter of fact, yeah, I do. What are you doing here?”

Sehun sighed. “I already told you—”

“He’s not home, you know. But he’ll come back from his run soon. I suggest you leave before that. He doesn’t need you. He has me. And he doesn’t need an Aequus. If it weren’t for you, everything wouldn’t have turned out so shitty for everyone. So, leave.” The boy said nothing more as he leaped upstairs. Sehun heard Jaehyun’s sharp gasp down the hallway.

Kneading his temples, he plumped on a couch. The furniture was all new. A lot was different in here now. The house was missing a scent.

“It’s nice of you to come by,” Hana said when she returned with two cups of what smelled like herbal tea. Taeyong eventually joined them, all red-faced and flushed.

“Hey, Hana,” he said sourly.

“I’m glad you came along, Taeyong,” Hana told him as he took a seat beside Sehun. “It’s been very long since we met.”

“Yeah.”

Sehun licked his lips. “Hana… I’m sorry about… Geun.”

Hana smiled again. “Thank you. Did… Kai tell you?”

Sehun didn’t reply.

“Wait, Kai told you?” Taeyong asked, surprised. “Is that how you knew? You talked to him? Again?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Sehun whispered.

Hana laughed softly. “I see you haven’t changed much.”

That had to be the most ridiculous thing Sehun had ever heard. “Everything changed, Hana,” he told her.

Her smile faltered before she said, “Not everything.” She rose to her full height. “This is still your house, Sehun. You don’t have to be a stranger in it. Geun would have hated that.”

“Then maybe he shouldn’t have abandoned me right after my parents died,” Sehun shot at her.

Hana frowned. “You wouldn’t understand now, Sehun. But you will. Thank you… for coming here again.”

“Wow,” Taeyong let out. “Let’s just go, Sehun.”

Sehun glanced at the stairs. He recalled the day Kai had stolen a kiss from him on the very staircase as they hurried snuck up to his room without gathering too much attention to themselves from Kai’s family.

Before he was even thinking, his feet were already moving.

“Sehun?” Taeyong called.

“I’ll be right back,” he murmured and ascended the stairs. The part of him that ached to see what sort of life Kai had been living without him got the best of him.

He wandered up to Kai’s bedroom, the room in the house Sehun had spent most of his time in. The first time he had given Kai a kiss on the cheek was in this room. He hadn’t known then that that innocent act of kindness would transform into something so raw and painful.

He twisted the doorknob and entered. There was a desk now. And a much bigger bed. The black drapes were pulled close, allowing almost no light into the room. Not that it mattered, the skies had already darkened outside.

The bedroom smelled like Kai. And it hurt Sehun in the deepest pit of his stomach. He started quaking again. He wasn’t sure if it were the heat or just the mere presence of Kai’s scent.

He dragged his feet to the desk, his throat tightening. Then turning the lamp on, he scanned the piles of papers, the laptop, and the photo frame on the desk.

In that moment, his entire body seized. A silly boy with an upset frown and rosy cheeks and sad eyes, because he was worried of his gift for his boyfriend not being as good as all the fancy presents he had received from his family, was looking back at him from the photo frame on the desk. Sehun remembered that polaroid picture all too well and the exact instant it was captured.

Mouth dry, he noticed the scent had intensified. He raised his gaze, which eventually landed on Kai in the doorway, shirtless and covered in sweat. He was even panting as his abdominal muscles and chest heaved laboriously, dripping sweat.

And around his neck was a familiar leather cord. Sehun’s eyes slowly drooped to the carved wooden wolf resting against the sternum of Kai’s sweaty chest.

Neither of them could utter a word as their eyes bored into one another. They were never great at communicating out loud. And yet, they had always desired each other like there was no ground, air, world between them.

Kai dropped his gaze. Then all of a sudden, his eyebrows drew together. His head whipped up and turned. And he was gone again.

A few seconds later, Sehun smelled it, too.

He ran downstairs and found Kai, Jaehyun, Hana, and Noah standing on the porch, all of them alert and cocked for fight.

“Sehun,” Taeyong rasped, tugging at Sehun’s arm. “It’s him,” he whispered. Sehun blinked. “It’s fucking _Kali._ ”

He pulled his arm free from his friend’s grip and headed out to the porch. His jaw fell slack as his blood started pounding in his ears.

Rexits had the house surrounded. In their wolves. And they were many. Countless. But enough to destroy a small family of Regnandis.

And at their head, Kali stood, fists clenched, lips curled into a cocky smirk.

“We finally meet!” he called out as the wolves snarled and howled behind him. His smile then turned into something gnarly as he fixed Kai with a threatful dark look. Sehun watched his eyes turn gold and it reminded him of another pair of golden eyes. “It’s rude to not say hi to family when you’re in town, dear old nephew.”

Kai’s back muscles flexed tensely as he fisted his hands. Then baring his teeth, he said, “Uncle.”


	18. Chapter 18

_Uncle… Uncle?_

“Quite the turnout, isn’t it?” Kali said, gesturing to the wolves.

Kai gritted his teeth. “You’re causing a scene.”

Kali scoffed. “You think I brought them here? I am here because I don’t _want_ a scene.”

Sehun could not wrap his head around the information he had just been fed. Uncle? Kali was Kai’s… uncle?

They were… family?

“They’re… related?” Taeyong let out beside him, as though he had read Sehun’s mind. “Wow. I did not… see that coming. And… I definitely didn’t know… there were so many… wolves in Oakenbury.”

Sehun wasn’t sure what maddened him more. The fact that he had been so oblivious, in spite of having known both Kali and Kai’s family, or the fact that neither Kali nor Kai had told him anything.

What was Kali’s game? Why didn’t he tell Sehun sooner that he was Kai’s family? And the other night, when Kai burst into his house to yell at him for working for Kali, why hadn’t he said anything.

That did not come as much of a surprise, though. After all of the things Kai had _not_ told him…

“Get your wolves off my territory,” Kai growled.

Kali chuckled. “They’re not _my_ wolves, Kai. I’m not their Alpha. I don’t order them. I just… advise them.”

“Then _advise_ them to get the fuck off our land,” he spat.

“You see, this is not your territory anymore,” Kali said. “In fact, it belonged to my father and his original pack. Rightfully, it is mine.”

Hana stepped forward, then. “You’ve lost that right long ago, Kali,” she said composedly. “If you want to talk, then send these Rexits away. And we’ll talk to you.”

Kali smirked. But he looked to the other wolves around him. Within seconds, they dispersed, disappearing through the trees. Except for three that remained at Kali’s sides. Two timber wolves, one black wolf with violet eyes.

Sehun wondered if those three were the same Rexits he had seen back at the manor. Maza, Jack, and the other guy, whose name he hadn’t learned.

One of the timber wolves had a ring around the bridge between its nostrils. Jack.

Thundering footfalls of bolting wolves boomed in the air around the house before two black wolves, one grey wolf, and a brown wolf leaped out of the forest and took their positions on the driveway, before Kai. They bared their fangs at the three Rexit wolves.

Sehun recognized Yixing and Chanri immediately. They looked just like Geun. But Jeni, the brown wolf, was much bigger than the last time he had seen her.

Kali clicked his tongue. “I didn’t come here to fight.” He looked up at Hana. “I’m sorry about your husband.”

Hana bowed her head. “Thank you.”

“Look,” Kali said with a big breath. “You can’t dance your way back here and claim authority. The Rexits won’t have it. For years, they’ve looked out for this territory. They’ve made this their home.”

“You Rexits have no home,” said Jaehyun. “That’s the whole point of an exile, Uncle Kali.”

Kali looked frustrated now. He advanced a few steps. The three wolves followed. Chanri, Yixing, Jeni, and Don stood their grounds but snarled harder and louder.

“They have nothing to lose,” Kali said. “And you… are severely outnumbered here. I’m not here to plead _their_ case. I’m here to plead yours.” He was facing Hana. “I am sorry about what happened to my brother. He was one of the… few good ones but… he’s not around anymore, Hana. You should know better than to come back here.”

“This is our home,” Hana said.

“Which you left,” Kali countered.

“Nevertheless, it is still our home,” she said. “We had sworn to protect our territory. We left but we’re back now. These Rexits can’t claim ownership of something that doesn’t belong to them. They are squatters and at the end of the day, this is a Regnandi territory. It would have been yours to claim but you are not a Regnandi anymore. So, get off my home.”

Kali licked his lips and scratched his beard. “You’re making it tough for me, Hana. You see. The problem with us Rexits is that… we don’t play by your rules anymore. Actually, we don’t play by anybody’s rules. Which makes us dangerous. We don’t have a pack, sure. We’re all stranded and on the verge of our sanity. But what do you think brought all those Rexits together here today? They came here together because they have a common goal. To get rid of you Regnandis. If you stay here, don’t grouse later, because I warned you.”

“You and your Rexits do anything to us,” Kai said now, climbing down the rest of the porch steps. The others followed behind him except Sehun and Taeyong. “The next minute, hundreds of Regnandi packs will here to annihilate every single one of you.”

Sehun’s heard was pounding so hard that he thought he might keel over. He had never heard Kai speak that way. His words were full of threat, real threat. And he sounded like Geun. So much like him.

One of the timber wolves at Kali’s side took a shy step forward with a curious look. It was Jack and he was looking behind Kai. For a moment, Sehun thought the wolf was staring at him. But then he realized the timber wolf’s amber eyes were fixated on the svelte, short redhead standing near Kai’s back.

“Why don’t you go ahead and try, Uncle?” Kai told Kali. “Just try.”

Kali said nothing as his eyes bored into his nephew for a minute. Then he smiled. “If it is a fight you want, then there’s nothing I can do. I heard you took your father’s place when he took yours. But a leader of a pack must earn its respect, son. You brought nothing but misery and disappointment to yours.” His eyes roved the rest of the pack before falling on Sehun. His smile widened. “I know what that feels like.” He told Kai and closed the distance between them to give him half a hug.

Kai did not lift a hand.

Kali pulled back. “Tread carefully in these woods. Beasts lurk about.” He gave Kai’s shoulder a pat before he turned around and walked away.

“The man hasn’t changed one bit,” Hana said with a heavy sigh as she turned back to the house.

“I see why you refused to marry him and went for Dad instead, Mom,” Jaehyun commented.

“That was not why I refused him,” Hana muttered. “Your father was my—”

“Soulbinder,” Jaehyun snorted. “Yeah, yeah, I know.”

Hana and Jaehyun stopped before Sehun and Taeyong. None of them looked like they could say anything to each other. Sehun had questions. So many questions. But he knew he didn’t have the right to ask them.

The two black wolves howled at one another before they sprinted back into the forest. The grey and brown wolves followed suit.

Kai stood there, glaring emptily the trees.

The black and timber Rexit wolves had gone after Kali, but Jack remained. The wolf edged closer to Noah, who looked too confused to move.

Jack pressed his snoot to Noah’s hand and sniffed him.

That was when Noah flung his hand and fiercely backhanded the timber wolf’s nose. “Go away,” he spat at the big, ferocious grey wolf, which retreated at once, whining in slight pain. Then shaking its head and rubbing its nose, that was just struck with knuckles, with a side of a paw, it ran after the others.

“I wonder what that’s all about,” Jaehyun muttered to his mother.

“I… might have an idea,” Hana replied, face sullen and worried. “Noah, come on in.” Noah did as he was told. He pinned Sehun with a rotten glare before he stomped into the house. “Kai?” Hana called, but when Kai did not respond or turn around to look at her, she ambled inside.

“We should… get going,” Taeyong said to Sehun. “Before I turn into dinner to one of these wolves.”

Sehun nodded thoughtlessly as he continued to stare at Kai’s back.

* * *

“So, what are you going to do?” Taeyong asked later in the diner. “Are you going to go back to work for Kali?”

Sehun popped another forkful of baked beans into his mouth. “I don’t know.”

“What do you mean you don’t know, man? Did you see what happened today?” he hissed. “Do you want to be caught in the middle of all that? You’re an Aequus. You don’t really matter to them.”

“Maybe I want,” Sehun snapped. Taeyong blinked. “Maybe I want, okay? Matter to them. I don’t… want to be an Aequus.”

Taeyong reached out and squeezed his hand. “But you are, buddy. And… it’s not as bad as being human, is it?”

Sehun laughed. “It’s so much worse. You have a… choice. I don’t.”

“What are you talking about?”

Sehun shook his head.

“ _Perdón_ ,” Baz said, walking over to them. “but I just saw two fancy cars pull up.”

Sehun turned around at once when the bell chimed as the door was pushed open.

“Why do they keep coming here?” Baz groaned.

“It’s where they you used to hang out, too. And it’s the one decent place to eat in Oakenbury,” Taeyong mumbled. “Either that, or they’re following us. God, I’m already so tired of them for one day.”

Yixing walked in with a baby in his arms. Jeni was making funny faces at the cooing, happy baby. Kai came in last with Noah clinging to his arm. No sign of Jaehyun or Chanri. Kai’s eyes met Sehun’s. He looked tired. But so did Sehun.

They found a booth to settle in.

“I really don’t want to do this. I don’t think they like me very much,” Baz said.

“Then ban them from the diner,” Taeyong said.

“I can’t. Not without reason. Plus, it’s how I make my living.”

“You and your eleven cats.”

Baz sucked in a deep breath, chest pushed out, and glasses shoved up. “Wish me luck.”

“You want to get out of here?” Taeyong asked.

“I think I’m running out of places to run to where I won’t have to interact with one of Kai’s family members,” Sehun said, shaking his head.

“This is a little pathetic.” Taeyong sipped his beer.

Sehun’s gaze was fixed on Kai and Noah, who wouldn’t let go of Kai’s arm even for a second. He was grinning and chuckling, scanning the menu card. “What’s so funny in that menu card,” Sehun grumbled. “I’ve never wanted to punch someone so bad.”

“Who are you talking about?”

“That ginger trollop,” Sehun spat and turned away, not wanting to lose his composure. If he got up and left now, he’d be losing again. It would only prove that he was not over Kai.

And he was over Kai. Totally and committedly.

He was hot. The diner was hot. He thought he might break a sweat.

He didn’t realize he wasn’t breathing until Taeyong asked, “Are you holding your breath?”

“No,” he said. He was. He was holding his breath so that he would not have to smell Kai’s scent. Or Noah’s scent that was clinging onto Kai’s.

“You look like you’re about to have a seizure, Sehun.”

“I’m fine.”

“Okay… But you’re jealous, aren’t you? Of… that redhead.”

Sehun did not answer him. He tried to focus on his breathing as he looked back at the booth.

“Can I take your order?” Baz asked.

“Yes, please,” Yixing said. He ordered first. Jeni next and Noah ordered for him and Kai.

“K-Ketchup?” Baz stuttered, fidgeting with his spectacles. Yixing smiled up at him with his baby bouncing excitedly on his lap.

“Sure. Thanks.”

Baz hurried back behind the counter to leave the order to the kitchen staff. When he turned to Sehun and Taeyong, he said, “The baby’s so cute.”

“That’s what you care about?” Taeyong asked, scowling.

“What? He _is_ cute.” Baz frowned and walked away again to attend another booth.

Sehun and Kai were staring at each other now. The old Mexican music from the jukebox faded in the background.

* * *

 _“I love you,”_ Kai blurted out. His tan skin could not hide the blush on his cheeks. His lips were quivering and so were the hands that were gripping the rose stalks. He stood on Sehun’s house’s curb, all dressed up in a white shirt and red bowtie.

Sehun blinked. He then glanced back at his porch and found his mother peeking. _“Mooooom,”_ he groaned.

 _“Oh, sorry,”_ she rasped and quickly disappeared into the house.

Then facing Kai again, he asked, _“What is this all about?”_

Kai parted his lips to say something but didn’t. He frowned sadly, hands still holding the roses out to Sehun. A moment later, he embarrassedly said, _“It was my stupid, stupid sister’s idea. She said… I needed to… confess… my… my… love… for you… out… loud and take you… out on… a good and… proper… date.”_

Sehun folded his arms over his chest, an eyebrow cocked. _“So… you love me, huh?”_

Kai gulped. He still held the roses up, waiting for Sehun to take them. _“Y-Yes… I love you.”_

_“Okay. What will you do for me, then? If you love me so much?”_

Kai frowned harder. _“I… I would do everything for you.”_

_“Everything?”_

_“Yes… E-Everything.”_ He dropped his eyes to the roses. _“Please, Sehun… Don’t reject my flowers again.”_

Sehun’s eyes widened. _“Again?”_

Kai looked ashamed.

Sehun accepted the roses. There was finally a shot of relief in Kai’s face. They sat down on the curb. _“Do you… really love me?”_ Sehun asked Kai, trying to maintain a straight, stoic expression, even though his heart was fluttering like the beating wings of a butterfly.

Kai nodded slowly, eyes on the gravelly road.

Sehun smiled. _“Okay.”_

 _“Okay,”_ Kai said, smiling back.

* * *

Sehun never got to tell Kai that he loved him back.

He stood up from the barstool.

“Where are you going?” Taeyong asked. Sehun did not reply as he walked over to the booth.

Noah’s eyes ballooned as he saw Sehun approach their table, but Kai remained expressionless.

“Can we talk?” Sehun asked, stopping by the booth.

Kai stared at him for a stretch before he started rising to his feet. Noah released his arm at once. “I don’t think we have anything to talk about,” he told Sehun.

Sehun glared at him and then at the leather cord that peeped out from his shirt’s collar. “I think we do, Kai,” he said. “I think we have… _too much_ to talk about actually.”

“Kai,” Yixing muttered.

“Shut it, Yixing,” Sehun growled at him. Yixing froze for a second before he shrugged.

“Might as well.”

“He said there’s nothing for you to talk about,” Noah said.

“I have nothing to lose in my life,” Sehun snapped at him. “I will drive a table knife up your ginger ass without thinking twice if you don’t shut your blowhole too, you rude bitch-ass twink.”

Noah’s mouth fell open. Yeah, Sehun was not a sophisticate like Noah was. Too fucking bad.

“He really hasn’t changed much, huh,” Yixing mumbled to Jeni.

“Mom was right,” Jeni whispered back.

“Sehun,” Baz gasped, running over to him. “You’re causing a commotion.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” Taeyong said as he took hold of Sehun’s arms. “Let’s get you out of here.”

The baby spat its binky out and broke into a loud cry.

“ _Great_ ,” Yixing groaned and stood up with the baby to step outside.

Sehun glared at Kai. And before he knew it, his hand was flying up to grab Kai’s arm. “I want to talk to you,” he demanded shakily.

Kai pulled his arm free. Then in a low, firm voice, he said, “No.”

Sehun wasn’t sure if it were the anger that had caused the tears that stung his eyes or if it were the disappointment. He took a step back. “You’re horrible,” he let out before storming out of the diner.

When Taeyong tried to pursue him, he snarled at his friend to stop.

Outside, in the cold, he heard Yixing call his name. He stopped and turned around to look at the man and the baby with tears blurring his eyes.

“You… in the mood to talk to _me_?” Yixing asked.


	19. Chapter 19

“Are you okay?” Yixing asked a few moments after they had started walking toward _Bianchi’s Café._ The town was depressingly dead like it always was at night. Into the quiet the baby cooed, resting its head against his father’s shoulder. Yixing drew the hat lower at the back of the baby’s head and gently patted its back.

Sliding his hands into the pockets of his jacket, Sehun glanced at the baby, whose eyelids were falling heavy as it slowly sucked on its pacifier. He then shifted his gaze to Yixing.

It felt a little surreal. Seeing Yixing with a child. He was a father now. A father, a parent. This was the same guy Sehun had met when they were only children. While a part of him was astounded, a huge part of him was disappointed that he wasn’t there when all of these wonderful things had happened to Yixing.

“What’s… his name?” Sehun asked.

“Nova,” Yixing said with a smile. “A troublemaker this one. Take his binky away and you’ll see some real dramatic action.”

Sehun let out a soft chuckle. “You don’t have to tell me. I used to be just like him,” he muttered and heard Yixing laugh. The baby shifted his head on his father’s shoulder as he began to drift off. Baz was right. The baby was adorable.

Upon reaching the café, Sehun fumbled with the keys before unlocking the door. The bell gave a small ring as he pushed the door of the empty, dark café open.

“I thought you didn’t work here anymore,” Yixing commented as Sehun turned the lights on.

“I don’t. But Mrs. Bianchi let me keep the keys in case she needed me to drop in for a favour.” He hadn’t believed her. She knew he needed a place to go where his problems wouldn’t follow.

“This place is neat,” said Yixing as he took a seat on one of the sofas near the wall and settled the baby in another.

“You want a… coffee?” Sehun asked.

Yixing gave the sleeping baby’s curled hand a kiss before he raised his head and turned to Sehun. “Sure. And a cupcake.”

Sehun pressed his lips into a thin smile. “Pistachio?”

“You remember.”

“How can I forget?”

As he wandered behind the counter to make two cups of coffee, he tried to push Kai’s thoughts out of his head.

_No._

The bastard…

Sehun wanted to kick himself. He never should have gone over to Kai’s table and asked to talk with the man. But was he surprised? Not really. Not after years and years of Kai _refusing_ to talk to him. Sehun just never learned.

However, he wanted to talk to Kai this time because he needed answers. For what had happened, for what was happening, and for what was about to happen. But the way Kai had dismissed him made Sehun wonder if he really were insignificant in all of this. Maybe he really did not matter.

“No cream,” he said as he sat down across Yixing, sliding the coffee cup and the saucer of cupcake over to Yixing. “Just the way you like it.”

Yixing flashed an endearing smile as he took a sip of the hot coffee. Outside, the street was eerily dark, the streetlights barely shedding any light onto it.

Staring into the cup, Sehun inhaled the fragrant scent of the coffee. The baby stirred on the sofa, one of his feet twitching as he dreamed.

“So, where’s his mother?” he blurted out.

Yixing placed the cup back down on the table and licked his lips. “Not… in our lives anymore.”

Sehun fell silent for a second. “Is she… dead?”

“No,” Yixing sniggered. “She, um, left. Eloped with a… another guy.”

Sehun’s eyes widened. He looked at the baby again. “But he’s only a baby.”

“Yeah. She took off the instant he was out,” Yixing said with a dead laugh.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Sehun murmured.

“I’m not. It was a miserable marriage. She _hated_ me.” He rubbed his forehead. “I hated her, too.”

“Were you… married?”

Yixing nodded. “For two years. It wasn’t out of love, obviously. My parents and her parents made an alliance, and we went through with it.”

“You’re single now, then,” Sehun said.

“Yeah.”

“You haven’t found your… Soulbinder?”

Yixing laughed. “I don’t think that matters anymore. I just want to be here for this little guy now.”

“How could she… just up and leave? Isn’t he her pack, too?”

“That’s not how it works, Sehun,” Yixing scoffed. “The wolves become a pack through years of bond and unconditional love and trust. Blood isn’t everything.”

Sehun felt his heart clench. “We had bond, unconditional love and trust for years,” he said. “I wasn’t your pack.”

Yixing’s smile faltered. “I deserved that. In fact, we all do.”

Sehun leaned back on his seat. “Am I wrong to be mad?”

“Not at all,” he said. “You want explanation. You want reasons. You want justice. It’s all fair.” He cleared his throat. “And you want it all straight from Kai.”

Sehun shook his head. “No,” he said. “I want it from all of you.” Yixing was slightly taken aback by that statement. “I thought you were all my family. But then you leave behind and after a decade, you move back in and… pretend like nothing happened. Except that now… I’m more left out of everything that concerns your family and pack. Then I find out, my new employer, the bigshot Rexit in town, is actually a close relative of yours. Makes me question everything.”

Yixing exhaled heavily. “You’re right to be mad at us.”

Sehun glanced out the window with a dull sigh.

“Sehun,” Yixing called. “Nothing I say now is… going to erase all those years of hardships.”

“Hardships?” Sehun snorted. “Isn’t that the understatement of the century… You know what’s shittier than you abandoning me when I needed you all the most? You coming back and not even bothering with a… sorry.”

Yixing slowly bowed his head. “Sure. But apologies should be made when one is regretful of their choices, no?”

“So, you are admitting that you’re _not_ sorry?”

“No,” Yixing said. “We’re not. Maybe we’re sorry for getting you involved with us in the first place. But we’re not really sorry about that, are we? Because we cherish you, Sehun. We… loved you. Like our own. You were… pack. In spite of what you may believe. Which was why… it almost killed us to leave you here in Oakenbury.”

Sehun clenched his hands to stop them from shaking. “Don’t say that if it’s not true.”

“I don’t lie to you, Sehun. I’m not saying any of this to make you feel better.”

With tears in his eyes, Sehun said, “You could have called. You could have visited.”

“We really couldn’t.”

“Why?!”

“Shh,” Yixing hushed him, patting the baby. “You’re going to wake Nova.”

Sehun sealed his lips.

“The Rexits had attacked and killed your parents, Sehun,” Yixing then said. “And Kali had… gone rogue. We had to go back to the Regnandis. When we first moved here fifteen years ago, my father was… looking to expunge the Rexits that were starting to seek refuge in Oakenbury, where there hasn’t been a Regnandi domination for very long. This town has… very little to offer, as you know. But then the Rexits started making this town their home. My father was sent here to… get rid of them. To show them that this was still a Regnandi territory.”

“Aequuses live on your territory,” Sehun pointed out.

“That’s different. Aequuses are docile non-shifters. They are not hostile like the Rexits. And obviously, not in exile.”

“Why did you leave, then?” asked Sehun miserably. “Because of what happened to my parents? You got scared? You were trying to protect me? You left me alone with no protection.”

“I don’t know, Sehun. Everything just… collapsed at once. Chanri was attracting too much attention. The Regnandis were keeping a really, really close eye on us all the time. Then there was Kai… following _you_ around like a puppy. And Uncle Kali turned Rexit and killed two packs of Regnandis before he fled with his child. I remember at that time, my parents told us that it was to keep you safe. And I suppose… you being with us… made us vulnerable. And it was too dangerous for you. Because at the end of the day, you can’t… really be one of us. Do you understand?”

Sehun gritted his teeth. “You mean, at the end of the day, I can’t be one of you because I can’t be with… Kai. Because he will never… take me as a… mate.”

Yixing lowered his gaze. “When we were children, it was all very easy. Nothing could stop us. But we all knew we’d have to take up the responsibility once we’re older.”

Sehun planted his head in his hands. “Why didn’t you come back sooner?”

“We could. Dad got busy. Then all of us got busy. Kai vanished for three years and only came home a year ago.”

“What?” Sehun’s head shot up. “He vanished for three years? What does that mean?”

Yixing’s face twisted with pain. “We heard his songs, you know? We’re his family. We hear every… agonizing song of his. We heard them… every night. For three years. At first, the songs were… all about you. Then… it became about us. He wanted to return to his pack. He was in… hell. I almost couldn’t take it. I wanted to get out there and take his place. Jaehyun wanted to do the same, and Chanri, even Jeni. Our Mom would cry almost every night. We missed him, and he missed us. He wanted to come home so bad, but he couldn’t. He… ran in the woods for three years in his wolf. He didn’t transform into his human for… three fucking years. When he came back to us, he couldn’t shift for… months. It took a lot of effort to get his humanity back. Now, I don’t know… what happened between you both that made him… lose control like that. But in his songs, he clearly saw you as his only mate.”

Sehun hadn’t realized that he had closed his eyes somewhere along Yixing’s narration. When he opened them again, his eyelashes were clumped with tears. “Some mate,” he let out. “He’s with… that… Regnandi Omega now, isn’t he?”

“Yeah,” Yixing sighed.

“I smell Noah all over Kai. He’s taken a mate.”

“He’s taken a few mates, actually,” Yixing said with a sudden smirk. “As soon as he was shifting again, he came home with a redhead almost every week. We thought it was… his coping mechanism.”

“You’re not helping.” Sehun groaned. “Wait. Coping mechanism for…?”

“For dealing with happened to… Dad. And for what happened with you, I suppose.” He took another sip of the coffee.

Sehun swallowed. “He sleeps with… other people? Isn’t that… kind of strange for a… wolf?”

“It is. Speaking from experience, I don’t think it’s as enjoyable as it should be.”

Sehun made a noise at the back of his throat. “I don’t want to talk about sex with you right now.”

Yixing chuckled. “My point is, I hope you don’t feel too bad about… Noah. The kid’s got good in his heart. A little… insecure.”

“Him? Insecure? That pretentious little goat?”

“He knows Kai doesn’t see him the way… he sees you. And he never will. And he knows he’s not the only mate Kai will be taking.”

“Then why is he sticking onto him like a leech?”

“Like I said, responsibilities. We all have them.” He shrugged. Sehun felt just a tiny twinge of sympathy for that insufferable redhead then.

“What is… Kali doing here, then? Is he really… Geun’s brother?”

“Half-brother. You want all your answers, huh?” Yixing said.

“You’re obviously not giving me _all_ the answers. But I know darn well that you can give me this. Kai barged into my house the other night because he was mad about me working for Kali.”

“Because it’s not safe, Sehun,” said Yixing, his expression hardening as his eyes narrowed. “for you to trust them. When you start hanging out with them, you’ll be perceived as one of them. You’re on their side.” His scowl softened. “Which in hindsight, is better than you being on… our side.”

He stood up and collecting his son in his arms.

“What do you mean by that?” Sehun asked confusedly.

Yixing paused to face him again. “We don’t want you to share the same fate as your parents, Sehun. You were a child before. But you’re a grownup now. Your actions are… your responsibility but, you should stay away from us, Sehun. Especially Kai. The Rexits are dangerous. But the Regnandis… are worse.”

With that, he walked out of the café, leaving Sehun to entertain his muddled thoughts.

* * *

He did end up going in to work the following Monday after managing to avoid the Regnandis on the street he lived all weekend. Taeyong and Baz took turns to check in on him, to make sure he was not mauled by the wolves yet. Sara called once. She had a whole lecture loaded for him. And she voiced how disappointed she was that Sehun was even thinking about ‘understanding’ Kai and his family’s plight just because Geun was dead.

“Where is he?” Sehun asked when the servant got the door early in the morning.

“Excuse me?” she said, shocked, as Sehun shoved past her.

“I have to see him. Where is Kali?”

“He is… still asleep.”

“Where is his room?”

“Uh.”

“Are you going to tell me, or should I break something to wake him up?”

She pointed him in the direction of Kali’s quarters. Sehun leaped up the stairs and found himself on the second floor for the first time. The hallways were not much different up here.

Upon reaching the room, he pounded his fist a couple of times on the door until it swung open.

Kali glared at him gingerly, his eyes still half asleep. Sehun let his eyes briefly wander to Kali’s shirtless body and the taut muscles beneath those scattering of dark and grey hairs and tattoos.

“I am not a very patient man when I’m not fully awake,” Kali said in a hoarse, sleepy voice, rifling his fingers through his hair. “And you shouldn’t be testing my patience while you’re smelling like that.”

Sehun gulped and cleared his throat. “Smelling like… what?”

Kali rolled his annoyed blue eyes and turned his back to Sehun, sauntering over to the liquor cart in his room to pour himself a tumbler of alcohol.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Sehun rasped, stepping into the room. “What is this? A-Are y-you playing some sort of… game? Am I a pawn in this game of yours? Are you using me to somehow get back at your family? I wanted to do nothing with this family. I was willing to work for a Rexit to stay away from this family. And here I am, getting sucked right back into it!”

“Fine. Quit your job if you hate it so much,” Kali mumbled roughly, turning around to face Sehun once more. He then grabbed a shirt and pulled it on but left it unbuttoned.

“I…” Sehun stammered. “I’m not going… quit my job. I want to know what’s going on.”

“Nothing,” Kali spat. “Nothing is going on, kid. You think I haven’t heard about you before you showed up here? My brother told me about you. Hana spoke of you every time we met up and called each other. And sometimes, they’d tell me how they wished you were one of us. If Geun were here, he’d want to look after you. I’m just… filling in for the position.”

Sehun blinked vacantly. “You’re… doing me a… favour?”

Kali huffed heavily. “Don’t take it personally. I did need a caregiver for Jax. And you showed up. I didn’t see why I shouldn’t… do something Geun would have wanted to.”

Sehun’s breathing calmed then. But his head started to spin a little. “So… you and… Geun’s family have no… bad blood?”

“Oh, we do,” Kali scoffed out a chuckle. He leaned against the piano in his room. Sehun wondered if a brute like him could play the piano. His gaze dropped to the tattoos inked to the man’s tan skin, against the protruding veins on his chest, ribs and biceps. “I just figured you wouldn’t want to work here if you knew who I was.”

“And you thought I’d never find out?”

“I wasn’t planning on them returning to Oakenbury anytime soon.” He shrugged.

“If you have no quarrel with them, why do you all hate each other?”

“Hate is a strong word. Which family doesn’t have problems, right?” He took a breath. “I resented Geun for marrying Hana, when she was spoken for me. Of course, at that time, I didn’t have a Soulbinder. But I didn’t _hate_ him.”

“So, you’re not… going to attack them?”

“God, no. I am,” he said. Sehun froze. “I will. If they start getting out of line.”

“What do you mean?”

He drained the tumbler and placed it on the piano before scratching his bearded jaw. “They’re here to take their territory back. Kai is doing it to prove something. It’s as clear as the day. He wants the packs to respect him. To make something out of him. That’s understandable after what’s cost them all for his restoration in the pack. So, he’s desperate. And desperate wolves do the most stupid and reckless things. They’re careless and dangerous. He’s onto something. But the moment he launches an attack on the Rexits, we’re going to have a war. Guess which side I’m fighting for.”

“But they’re your _family_ ,” said Sehun.

“A family that didn’t fight for me,” Kali spat. “I’d rather fight for all these Rexits who lost a great deal because of the Regnandi pride. The Regnandis have territories everywhere. Oakenbury has become _our_ home. If I don’t fight for the Rexits, I will damn well fight for my son. I already warned them. If Kai wants to do something stupid, he’ll have to face the consequences.” He stopped to muster Sehun from head to toe. “And also those who side with him.”

Sehun rubbed a hand down his face. “This is insane. I didn’t want to get sucked into any of this.”

“You can still walk out. Be a free Aequus. You have that choice.” He walked over to Sehun and clapped a hand to Sehun’s shoulder. Then he pulled the door open again. “Jax is up.”

Grinding his teeth, Sehun started out the door. He stopped. Turned. “I don’t want to be a free Aequus,” he said. “I grew up with the wolves. My heart is with the wolves. I hate myself for not being one of you. And if there’s a war, then I want to fight for what’s right. I am so sick of being the bystander that gets left behind all the time. If Kai has something to prove, so do I.”

Kali smirked. “Pick his side, then.”

“No,” Sehun said. “Teach me.”

Kali arched an eyebrow. “What?”

“Teach me. To fight. To be on your side.”

Kali raised an arm to the doorjamb. “An Aequus wants to be a Rexit? That’s a first in history.”

* * *

When he rushed home that evening, he was already sweating through his clothes. Excitement rolled in his belly and rumbled in his chest.

Kali had agreed to train him. He had said Maza, Jack and Vergel would have a lot of fun training him. They’d start tomorrow.

Unfortunately, that was not all that was making him excited.

Pulling into the driveway, he quickly hurried out of the car. He thought he was about to pass out. Blood rushed to his brain and his loins with the same brutal speed. His body was burning. His heartrate was spiking. It felt like an itch that he could never scratch. Tears were pricking at his eyes. His skin crawled.

As soon as he managed to push the door open, he spilled inside and turned around to shut the door. But before he could, a strong hand grabbed the door’s edge and pushed it back.

Sehun staggered a couple of steps before looking up at Kai. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” he grumbled. “Get out.”

Kai closed the door behind him instead after entering. Then he locked it.

Sehun’s vision was starting to blur because he knew he was about to cry. He held his breath to block out Kai’s scent, but it didn’t help one bit. Kai was right in front him.

“Kai, this is not a good time. You need to go,” he whimpered out. “I can’t deal with you right now.”

Kai froze and stared at Sehun, as though he had finally stumbled upon some sort of revelation. “You’re…” he trailed off.

“Please, just… _go_ ,” Sehun begged now, completely mortified.

Kai wasn’t moving. Sehun turned on his heel then and started for the bathroom. A cold bath usually helped a little. By the time he reached the bathtub, however, he was already biting into his tongue until he tasted blood. It was part of it. The pain distracted him from the agony that brewed in the bottom of his belly.

He turned the shower on and almost stepped into the bathtub before he felt a hand curl around his arm and pull him back.

Kai took hold of his shoulders and looked into his eyes. “Relax,” he said, gently but also authoritatively. Sehun was panting, sobbing for air. His heart felt like it was about to burst. “Sehun, relax.”

He breathed Kai’s scent in then. Kai moved his hands from the shoulders to cup Sehun’s face. “I-I d-d-don’t know how to,” Sehun let out.

“Look at me. I’m here, all right?”

He was. He was here. And he should have been here all that time Sehun had to go through his heat cycle.

Sehun had foolishly believed Kai’s scent and presence would make it all worse. But it was quite the opposite effect. His heartbeat eased, his body stopped quaking. He breathed easy again as he gazed into Kai’s eyes.

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Kai dropped his hands from Sehun’s face and took a step back, frowning. “You okay now?” he asked in a soft voice as the water from the shower head pitter-pattered in the bathtub.


	20. Chapter 20

“How are you feeling now?”

Sehun blenched in his seat with a start when he heard Kai’s voice before he looked up at the Alpha, who had trudged into the bedroom with a mug in his hand.  Then shivering again, he hugged the blanket tighter around his body and lowered his head from where he sat on the edge of his bed.

This was terrible. Kai’s presence had somehow managed to calm him down. But his body still burned feverishly. It was both hot and cold concurrently while his insides did all sorts of strange things. His heart was thudding hard, blood against his temples. He thought he’d throw up. But he didn’t think he had the strength to do that. Just like how he did not harbour the strength to kick Kai out of his house.

Kai had helped him get to the bedroom a while ago. An arm snaked around his back, a side pressed tightly to Sehun’s. After seating Sehun down on the bed, he had draped a blanket around Sehun’s shoulders before he had hurried away.

He returned to the bedroom with a mug of water and without the jacket he had been wearing. Sehun tried not to look at the leather cord of the wooden wolf head locket that was peeking out Kai’s shirt collar.

Kai sat down. Beside Sehun. Close. Too close.

“Here,” he said, holding the mug out to Sehun. “Drink this.”

Sehun sat still. Well, not exactly _still_. He was trembling. But it was part of it. The cycle always started out intense. Then it mellowed into something even more painful because everything just _sucked._ His whole body and brain reacted the same way they would when he hadn’t eaten for three whole days. He wanted the world to die around him. He wanted himself to die. Even the air he breathed tasted venomous.

However, with Kai right by side, he felt strange. Like an eldritch wetness blanketing his searing hysteria. Which made him all the more nervous. Kai shouldn’t be here. Why _was_ he here?

Sehun wanted to ask him that. But he found himself collapsing against the bed. When his head involuntarily hit the pillow, he heard Kai shift. Placing the mug on the bedside table, Kai brought Sehun’s feet up onto the bed before he scooped Sehun up into his arms to replace him on the mattress, away from the edge.

Still clinging to the last silvers of his consciousness, Sehun watched Kai through a small slit of his eyes. Kai grabbed the duvet and covered Sehun with it. Then he sank back into his seat at the foot of the bed where he sat quietly, hands cupped around half of his face while Sehun drifted away to a peaceful sleep.

* * *

His eyes fluttered open to a dark room and something that smelled like chicken soup. His nose twitched. He wasn’t hungry. He didn’t have an appetite. He wanted to just die and melt away. But at least the smell did not make him want to murder someone.

“You’re awake?” came a voice he had been dreading to hear and _wanting_ to hear at the same time. His breathing quickened at once. He could not see Kai in the dark of his room, but he knew the wolf was standing in the corner, watching him.

Sehun drew his duvet up to his mouth and hid behind it. He wanted to turn his back to Kai, but he wasn’t sure if he could. The spices from the soup wafted in the air and burned his eyes a little.

He must have slept through at least a few hours. Was Kai here the whole time? Sehun did have a good sleep, though. Unlike all the other weeks he had been on his cycle. Mrs. Bianchi said that she understood when he didn’t come in to work. But Sehun doubted Kali and his Rexit friends would. He could not afford to show them that he had any weaknesses so early into this whole thing. They had just agreed to let him train with them.

He pushed himself upright with difficulty. He wanted to cry but didn’t know why. But he sure as hell was not going to let himself cry in front of Kai ever again.

“Easy,” Kai said, and he was already crossing the room.

“What are you… doing… here?” That stopped Kai in his tracks. Sehun leaned back against the headboard and turned the bedside lamp on. The brightness from the bulb hurt his eyes. He closed them momentarily before cracking one of them open to look at Kai, who was standing a couple of feet away from the bed with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Drink the water,” he then said without answering Sehun’s question as he reached for the mug on the bedside table. Perching on one corner of the mattress, he carefully curled a hand the lower back of Sehun’s head, his fingers gently carding the reddish-brown hair there.

It made Sehun’s heart go fast.

“Drink, Sehun,” Kai whispered. It was kind but there was a hint of authority in his tone. Sehun wanted to protest and tell him to get lost. But he yielded out of sheer exhaustion and pain and took a shy sip of the lukewarm water Kai fed him.

“ _No_ ,” he whined, turning his face away from the mug when Kai tried to make him drink more.

“Drink.” His grip on Sehun’s nape tightened. Sehun stopped squirming. He scowled at Kai now. “You’ll feel better.”

And Sehun didn’t know why he just trusted Kai.

After everything that had happened, he could still so easily trust the man? How? And just _why_?!

He tried to swallow a few more gulps before Kai released him and put the mug down. His head spun, so he rested it against the headboard, shutting his eyes again for a minute to gather his thoughts.

“After you fell asleep, I went home and asked Chanri to make you some chicken soup,” Kai said. Normally, even the sound of a pin drop would make his head feel like it was splitting during his heat cycle. But the sound of Kai’s voice soothed his nerves.

Kai looked away, hanging his head.

“You brought me chicken soup once when I wasn’t feeling well,” Kai muttered. “Remember?”

Sehun didn’t. Or at least he could not remember it right now. But he thought he saw Kai smile. He wasn’t. Or maybe he was for a fraction of a second.

“I need you to go,” Sehun managed to croak out. He did not mean it. He never meant it, did he?

He hadn’t meant it when he told Kai to go home when he climbed into his treehouse about fifteen years ago because he was nervous about what Sara had told him about boyfriends touching each other.

He hadn’t meant it when Kai showed up at his doorstep, his wolf eyes blazing with anger, when he believed Sehun had moved on.

And he didn’t mean it now.

But he needed Kai to go.

“You should drink some of that. It’ll help you,” Kai said, completely ignoring Sehun again.

He never listened. _Never._ Bastard.

He picked up the bowl of soup and scooped a spoonful. He blew on it next before bringing the spoon to Sehun’s mouth.

Sehun, with whatever might he had, shoved the spoon out of his way. The soup spilled, but Kai did not lose his hold on the spoon. He scowled faintly and took a furious breath.

“You cannot… come… into my house… as you please,” Sehun huffed out tiredly. “Especially not after you made it clear that… we have nothing to talk… about. I don’t want… your stupid… chicken soup… I don’t want to hear anything _you_ have to… say to me… Get… out.”

Putting the bowl back where it was, Kai stood up and wandered out of the room. Sehun breathed heavily, his heart racing again. His eyes widened when Kai returned with a towel.

He wiped up the spilt soup on the floor.

“Why the hell are you here?” Sehun rasped.

Kai rose back to his full height and turned around to face Sehun with a mild glower on his eyebrows. “I came to talk to you.”

Sehun scoffed and averted his gaze. “Now you want to talk? Not interested.”

Something twisted painfully in his lower belly. His heartrate continued to escalate. He was nervous. He was always nervous when he was on his cycle. And the anxiety made him want to swallow an apple whole.

“Are you all right?” Kai asked, sitting back down on the bed. “You’re sweating again.”

“I’m fine,” Sehun lied. He didn’t know if Kai even knew what he was going through.

Kai’s scowl waned into a frown. “I… I don’t really know much about… Omegas and… their Calor.”

Sehun’s brows dipped low. “Their what?”

Kai cleared his throat. “Calor. It’s what the wolves call it. I don’t know about what you Aequuses refer to it as.”

Sehun then realized that he had never had a ‘big talk’ on this matter. Well, he had a small ‘big talk’ with Sara when it all began. And he just went along with what she, a human, conjured up about the whole heat cycle. Because it made sense.

But he had never heard it explained by another wolf. He didn’t have any family he was close enough to discuss about that. And he most certainly did not want to hear any of this from Kai.

“My family’s all… Alpha,” Kai said, looking a little unnerved.

“Well, not Noah,” Sehun let out.

“Yeah. We didn’t… I didn’t learn much about Omegas until him. But he doesn’t go through this… Calor yet. It only happens to Omegas with a Soulbinder. I always wondered if… you went through it.”

Sehun wanted to cover his ears. This talk was making him even more nervous. Any faster, his heart might explode. And he was already sweating bullets.

Kai’s frown deepened as he pressed the back of his hand to Sehun’s forehead. “You’re really burning up.”

He swatted Kai’s hand away. “I said I’m fine.”

“I know you’re fine,” Kai spat and dropped his head again to scowl at the floor. He was quiet for a moment.

Sehun wished he had the power to kick an Alpha right now. And he also wished he had the courage to grab Kai by his shirt collar and kiss him. Sehun had always prided himself on his courage. He had been through a lot. He had always been courageous, even as a child. He kept many dangerous secrets from his parents. He had secretly not eaten _all_ of his vegetables like his mother told him to. He even kicked a cat once because it hissed at him for no reason. And he let himself grow up without his ‘pack’ for a decade.

However, when it came to all this, when it came to even touching Kai, courage had never been Sehun’s strongest suit. Not after the way Kai had run away after their first kiss.

“I know you’re fine,” Kai repeated at length. Then in a hoarse voice, he added, “But I’m not.”

Sehun stared at him.

What was that supposed to mean?

He didn’t elaborate. Sehun sighed. “I want to take a shower and just… go back to sleep. Can you just go?” he asked. “I don’t have the strength to argue if you’re here for that.”

“I’m not here for that,” Kai said, glancing at him again. “Come on. Let me help you shower.”

“I don’t need you to do that, Kai. I’ve done it. I’ve been through it all those years when no one was here, okay?” He climbed out of the bed and dragged his weight to the wardrobe to get a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt. When he glimpsed Kai, the wolf was not looking at him as he stared down at the floor.

Sehun left him there and slogged to the bathroom. When he returned after an exhausting shower, he hadn’t hoped to find Kai in the room. But there he was, still seated on the exact same spot on the bed.

“I want you safe,” Kai whispered without looking up. “It’s all I ever wanted.”

Sehun could hear Kai’s ragged breathing. It was as if the man was about to shift right in this very room.

“Maybe,” Kai then said. “it would have been better for us all if… if those two Rexits that attacked us when we were kids had succeeded in killing me.”

“You don’t mean that,” Sehun said dully. He knew Kai didn’t mean it.

Kai raised his head. “No, I don’t mean it,” he admitted. “You still needed me to protect you from all the _nyas._ ”

Sehun would have smiled at that. But Kai wasn’t smiling. “I’m not afraid of them anymore.”

“I guess what doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger, huh?” He looked away again.

Sehun licked his chapped lips. “When I asked to talk to you the other night… why didn’t you want to?” He hoped his voice was loud enough for Kai to hear him.

Kai scrubbed his face with his bare palms. “Like I said. I want you safe.”

“And wanting me safe entails keeping me in the dark? I’d rather _not_ be safe, then.” He stopped to pant, bracing himself against a wall. “You… You could have at least… told me about Kali. Yixing understands. He said that… it’s better for me to be on the Rexits’ side than yours.”

Kai craned his head up and loured viciously at Sehun. “Yixing isn’t wrong. But have you ever… thought about the fact that… you being on… their side means I’d… have to fight you, too?”

Sehun kept mum. Mostly because his head was spinning again.

“I just wanted you to stay out of this mess, Sehun,” Kai said. “But I guess it’s too late for that. You’ve made up your mind, haven’t you? I of all people should know better than to try and change it. I came to tell you that if you see me outside, don’t approach me. Don’t come over to my house, in spite of what my family might make you believe. You can’t belong there anymore.”

“Then why do you still… keep my picture and why… are you still wearing that… locket?” Sehun asked, voice cracking.

It was Kai’s turn to fall silent. He lowered his gaze, unable to meet Sehun eye to eye.

Sehun wanted to hear what Kai’s wolf would sing right now. His wolf was always more communicative than Kai ever was as human.

“Why haven’t you just… moved on?” Sehun asked quietly. “With Noah. With anyone?”

“Because I’m not you,” Kai said point-blank. He planted his face in his hands. “I don’t think I’m… as strong as you are,” he mumbled. “I try. I do try. I put on a… show. I’m a coward and I’m a faker. I can’t be like my father. I can’t be what the other… Regnandis want me to be. I can’t be what my family thought they were bringing up to be. Because… I… loved you for real, Sehun. It wasn’t… an act and I can’t just… move on. It’s more than just this whole Soulbinding and mate thing. I would have loved you just as much even if I weren’t a wolf.”

Sehun clenched his fists tightly.

“But that’s all… It all doesn’t matter anymore,” Kai said. “Not to you. Not to the Regnandis. Not to my family after my father’s…” he trailed off. “I came to say that you shouldn’t… come over when Noah and Don are there.” He started to get up.

Sehun pushed himself away from the wall and brought a hand to Kai’s shoulder to sit him back down.

Kai lowered back in his seat, eyebrows furrowed confusedly. His hands reflexively came up to the sides of Sehun’s waist when Sehun lifted his knees to the mattress on either side of Kai, hands holding onto Kai’s shoulders.

Straddling the wolf, Sehun knelt up and bowed his head to look down at Kai’s bewildered expression. His eyes were dark and wide, his ears red. When Sehun walked one of his hands down Kai’s chest, he felt the man’s heart beat faster and harder beneath his palm.

Sehun wanted to feel the raw heat of his bare skin. He wanted Kai to sink his teeth into his own skin.

“Sehun—” Kai began to gasp but was cut short as Sehun leaned in and rubbed his face against a crook of Kai’s neck.

“Why does this… feel so… calming?” Sehun panted out, fingers fumbling to undo the first few buttons on Kai’s shirt. Kai didn’t stop him. His hands remained still on Sehun’s waist.

He basked in Kai’s scent and pheromones, and inhaled them all, sliding his hands into the unbuttoned part of the shirt to splay his fingers on Kai’s hot, toned chest. His heart really was thundering.

They stayed that way for a few minutes. And Sehun felt his body cool down, his heartbeat steady, his head still resting against Kai’s shoulder, nose nuzzling into a side of Kai’s neck. He wished they could stay this way forever.

He would regret it tomorrow. He would regret it even a minute later. But he didn’t want to let go. He shouldn’t have let go years ago when everything was perfect in his little nest.

He did nothing but fall limp when Kai curled his strong arms around his back and lifted Sehun from his lap. Laying Sehun down on the bed, Kai clambered out of the bed and pulled the duvet over the drowsy boy.

Sehun’s eyes were almost closing. But he managed to see Kai remove the leather cord from his neck. The varnish on the wooden wolf head shone under the lamp’s light as Kai left it on the bedside table before he turned the lamp off and stormed out of the bedroom, then the house.

Even from that great of a distance, Sehun heard Kai’s sorrowful wolf songs that night as he let himself fall asleep to Kai’s scent that still lingered in the room and the tears beneath his eyelids.


	21. Chapter 21

“Why are we doing this?” the big man said with exasperation, his hands on the sides of his waist.

“Because we are nice people, Jack,” said Kali. There was a hint of sarcasm in his tone. Sehun ignored it. He was ready. So ready to learn how to fend for himself. And could there be better teachers than three headstrong, rebellious Rexits for that?

Maza seemed completely disinterested as she stood leaning against a tree on Kali’s backyard with her arms folded at her front. Vergel, the other Rexit with Maza and Jack appeared to be the nicest among the three. He even smiled at Sehun a few times, though his nose was scrunched up and twitching relentlessly.

It made Sehun’s face hot. He knew he smelled terrible. Or to virile male wolves, delicious. But whatever Kai did last night had helped. Sehun woke up this morning feeling better than ever. Not a sore in his arms, not a knot in his belly. He felt good. And the scent Kai had left in his room made him feel safe.

“I’m not nice people,” Jack scoffed. “I don’t want to teach a weak-wristed Omega to fight. He’s not even a Rexit!”

“I’m with Jack on this,” said Maza. Her dark skin glistened beautifully under the dusky sunlight. But the scowl on her lip was as terrifying as ever. Sehun tried not to show them that he was intimidated. “He’s an Aequus, Kali. He has no business running around with us. And for all the we know, he has a history with the Regnandis. How are you sure he’s not here sell us out?”

“I would never do that,” Sehun said. “My history with the Regnandis has nothing to do with this.”

Maza smirked and pulled away from the tree, approaching him with predatory steps. “Oh, yeah? Then why do you smell like one of them?”

Sehun blinked.

“Am I wrong? You have an Alpha’s scent all over you. You seem ridiculously calm for someone on his Calor.” Her lips quirked higher for a snarkier simper. “You make friends with the Regnandis. We make enemies. We’re not the same, baby boy.”

“I am not _friends_ with the Regnandis,” Sehun croaked. “I hate them. I hate them for… a lot of reasons. And I want to fight for myself. I am tired of being just another victim in one of their games. I want to prove that… I am more than just an Aequus Omega, who’s useless to them.”

Maza smiled then. “You are useless to us, too.”

“Mazalena,” Kali chided. “Look. The Regnandis have made enough enemies. But they’re failing to make friends, too. Having an Aequus on our side gives us perspective and an advantage.”

Vergel stepped forward. “I agree. Aequuses tend to stay away from all of this Regnandis’ affair. But Sehun has had experienced the tyranny of those bastards. This could be beneficial for us. If the other Aequuses see that one of their own is fighting for _our_ cause, we might get more support. Besides, they’d heed any Alpha.” He looked to Kali. “Regnandi or not.”

Kali bowed his head and turned to Sehun. “I will be honest with you, Sehun. We want something out of this. We want you to represent the Aequuses and get them on our side. Do you think you can do that?”

Sehun’s mouth loosened. “I…”

“He can’t,” Jack scoffed. “Who would listen to _him_ , anyway?”

Mrs. Bianchi would, Sehun thought. His uncles and aunts would. If there was a war coming between the Regnandis and the Rexits, they would need to stay on the side that was the safest for them.

“You’re an Alpha,” Sehun said to Kali. “Vergel is right. Regnandi or not, we’d… heed an Alpha.”

Kali raised a hand to Sehun’s shoulder. “That’s not how I want this work. I am not father and I am not my brother. I want you and your people to have a choice. And to make that choice without fear and regret.” Just like how Kali had made his choice. “Will you try talking to some of them?”

Sehun nodded. “I can… try.”

A faint smile formed on Kali’s lips. “Good. Do you want to run with us today?”

Sehun’s heart began pounding at once. With delirious excitement. Of course, he wanted to run with the wolves again. He wanted to feel like a wolf. He wanted to be a wolf.

“Yes,” he let out breathlessly.

Kali turned to Vergel, Maza, and Jack. “If you bring him scratched, I will have your heads for it,” he warned them.

“This ought to be fun,” Vergel said and retreated a few steps before he stripped down to nothing and vaulted off the ground before landing back on it as a black wolf with fierce violet eyes. It howled before it broke into a vicious sprint into the woods surrounding the manor.

“Show off,” Jack snorted and removed the unbuttoned flannel shirt and the T-shirt beneath it. Sehun tried not to stare at the man’s heavily-muscled, heavily-tatted naked body. Jack lunged forward and erupted into a massive timber wolf, chasing after the black wolf.

Maza groaned dismissively. “I’m telling you, Kali. This kid is no good news. And he’s a walking hormone.”

“I’m right here. I can hear you,” Sehun said, grimacing.

“I know.” She shrugged and took her clothes off. Then she too shifted into a timber wolf. She growled at Sehun as she crawled past him.

“I can’t hear their… songs,” Sehun said.

“They’re Rexits. You can’t hear their callings,” Kali said. “Now, go.”

“You’re not coming?”

“I have to go see Jax.”

Sehun turned around and jogged after Maza. For the first time in forever, he felt like he was living again.

* * *

That evening, before he went home, he stopped to say goodbye to Jax, only to find the boy crying in his bed.

“Jax?” Sehun called, hurrying to the bed’s side. “Are you all right?”

The boy wept silently, sniffling and wiping his nose on the back of his hand. “No, go away!” he bayed.

“Jax, why are you crying?”

The boy sat up and pinned Sehun with a teary glare. “I… I saw you,” he whispered.

Sehun was confused. He perched on the edge of the bed. “What’s wrong? What did you… see?”

Jax glowered harder now. “You… You were… running with the wolves.”

For a moment, Sehun stayed silent. Then he reached out for the boy’s hand. “And that… upsets you?”

The boy nodded his head, trembling. “You said you’re like me. But you’re… you’re running with the wolves. And I can’t.”

Sehun swallowed. He had no idea how to deal with this. Then he took a breath. He was bathed in sweat, he had a hard time keeping up with Maza, Vergel, and Jack. And Jack tried to pounce on him a couple of times before Maza yanked him away, her teeth clasped around Jack’s neck. But Sehun had never felt more alive.

“I’m sorry, Jax,” he muttered. “I didn’t do it to… upset you. I didn’t even think it would.”

“Of course, you didn’t. You don’t care about me. You’re only here for the money my dad pays you.”

Sehun frowned. “That’s not true.”

“It is. My father pays you to be my friend.”

“Jax… I am your friend. With or without the pay. And one day… you’re going to…” he stopped himself. He shouldn’t. He should not make promises he knew he couldn’t keep.

“Will I also run with the wolves?” Jax asked innocently. “Like a wolf? Like my dad?”

Sehun gave the boy’s hand a light squeeze. He should say no. He shouldn’t give the boy any false hope.

But sometimes, it was nice to have some hope. Something to live for.

“If you dream hard enough and work hard enough for it,” Sehun said with a small smile. “then perhaps one day, you too will be running with the wolves, Jax.

The boy seemed delighted with that. He wiped his cheeks. “How was it? To… run with them?”

“Well, tense,” Sehun said, chuckling. “Jack kept trying to… stumble me.” Or mount him. Sehun couldn’t tell for sure. “Thank god Maza was there.”

“I like Maza,” Jax giggled. “She can be scary but she’s pretty.”

“Ooh. Looks like someone has a crush.” He poked a finger into the boy’s chest.

Jax giggled some more and turned his blushing face away. “I’m not proud of it. And she still calls me ‘kid’.” He pouted.

“I remember my first crush,” Sehun said. “It was on… a whole pack of Alphas.”

“Really?” he gasped. “Do you… still have a crush on them?”

Sehun shook his head.

“Do you have a… girlfriend?”

Sehun laughed. “I did. A couple of them. A very, very long time ago. And then I had a… boyfriend. Also very, very long time ago.”

“Oh.” Jax sat up straighter. “You don’t have a boyfriend now?”

“No.”

“Why? Did you not like him anymore?”

Sehun gnawed at his lip. “No. No… I like him. The problem is I don’t think I can ever stop liking him.” He smiled miserably.

“Then why is he not your boyfriend anymore?” Jax looked puzzled. “Is he not a nice boy?”

Sehun chuckled. “No. He is a nice boy. A very nice boy who’d… protect me from the _nyas_ and bought me milkshakes and flowers. Got me dead bunnies.”

“Dad told me he told me he got my mommy dead bunnies! I will also get Maza dead bunnies when I’m older.”

Sehun pressed his lips into a thin smile.

“So, why did you stop being boyfriends?” the boy inquired confusedly. “He sounds wonderful.”

“Well, as you grow up… things change.” He rose from the bed and ruffled Jax’s hair. The kid let him. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Okay? No more crying.”

“I’ll try not to,” he said.

* * *

Back home, he took a long, deserving shower to wash all the dirt, sweat and traces of wolf from his body. After jumping into his pyjamas, he stopped by the bedside table and picked up the wolf head locket Kai had left.

Sometimes, it was nice to have some hope. Something to live for.

Sehun brushed the locket to his lips and pulled the leather cord over his head. The wooden wolf head rested against chest and heartbeat. He then crawled into his bed, completely worn out.

* * *

Sara drove to Oakenbury for a visit the next evening. Once she was brought up to speed, she grabbed Sehun’s ear and gave it twist. Sehun squirmed and groaned as they sat around boxes of pizza and beer on the floor back at Taeyong’s place. Baz sat this one out because he had to take care of the diner.

“You never learn, Sehun!” she yapped and released Sehun’s ear.

“He really doesn’t,” Taeyong mumbled, shaking his head, picking up a slice of pizza.

“We did nothing, okay?” Sehun grumbled. “He came, and we talked, and he left.”

“God.” Sara shook her head. “You can’t let this guy come back into your life and ruin it.”

“He can’t ruin something that’s already ruined,” Sehun counted, taking a sip of the beer. Sara scowled.

“We need to find you a new boyfriend,” she said determinedly.

“Wait, so,” Taeyong began while his sister started plotting something devious, drumming her fingers dramatically. “You’re training with Kali now?”

Sehun nodded. “I also need to talk to the other Aequuses.”

“So, they’re basically using you as an alliance tool to strengthen their position in this town.”

“Basically. But I’m okay with that.”

“Sehun, they are Rexits. All our lives we’ve resented those Rexits, feared them. And now you want to work _with_ them?”

Sehun sighed. “It’s better than looking weak and helpless in front of Regnandis.”

“You mean in front of Kai.”

Sehun kept mum.

“Well, for what it’s worth, you look… better,” said Sara. “Like healthier.”

Sehun smiled. “I do feel better.”

“Now, we just need to get you some new clothes that don’t look like they came out of the nineteen-hundreds.”

“My clothes are fine.”

Sara scoffed. “Fine for a four-year-old donkey from the nineteen-hundreds.”

“You’re meaner than you used to be, you know.”

“I’m a lawyer now. My livelihood depends on my meanness.”

* * *

When he left Taeyong’s place that night, too drunk to drive, he decided to walk back home.

Tottering along the sidewalk, he looked down at his jumper. It did not look so bad, did it?

Sehun had stopped caring about what he looked like quite some time ago. Why did it matter since the only man he loved had another redhead to warm his bed at night, anyway?

He pulled the locket out of the jumper and surveyed the messy carvings as he stumbled and whistled on his way home in the dead of the night when the entire town was asleep.

He wondered why Kai had returned it. To make a statement? That he was completely over Sehun now?

Kai had never been a great liar.

He teetered away from the streets and started for the forest as he neared his house. He’d see Maza, Jack, and Vergel again tomorrow. He was beyond exhilarated to run with them again. And maybe this time, he might stave off Jack’s attacks.

He remembered the days he used to run with Geun and his pack.

He missed Geun. He wished things were all very different so that Geun would still be here.

In a way, Kai wasn’t the only one to be blamed for Geun’s death. Sehun had a significant role to play in, too.

He wandered into the forest, tripping over his own feet several times. There was no moon in the sky tonight. He meandered between the trees. He wanted to find the bench again.

After almost an hour of searching for the bench in the dark, Sehun conceded defeat and slumped against a tree. His eyes also gave in and shed a few tears.

He couldn’t find the bench.

Kai had returned the locket Sehun had spent weeks carving.

His head spun.

The tears wouldn’t stop.

The bench was gone.

His soul felt like it was roaming aimlessly without its binder.

“Are you _trying_ to get killed?” he heard the voice before he caught the scent that drove him insane each and every time.

He opened his eyes that roved the forest, searching for the source of that voice. Kai stood a few feet before him, hands in the pockets of his sweatpants.

“Go home, Sehun,” he said, and even in the dark, Sehun could make out the scowl on his face.

He wiped the tears from his cheeks. “Are you… following me?” he drawled drunkenly.

“You’re only a few feet from my house,” Kai growled. “And this is my territory. You need to go home. There are Rexits everywhere. And you… you smell like—”

“Cheese, I know!” Sehun cawed. “You need to stop following me.” He drew away from the tree and stumbled forward with a finger pointed at Kai. “You’re ugly. And you’re annoying. I don’t need you protecting me. I don’t care if the Rexits want to hurt me. I don’t care if Regnandis killed me!” He stopped only a few inches before Kai and prodded his finger into Kai’s hard chest a couple of times. “I don’t care if you’re going to get kicked out of your dumb pack. I sure as hell don’t care about your stupid Regnandi friends! So, you don’t tell me… what I should do. You don’t tell me to stay away from you. If I want to be bent over and fucked by you, that’s my business. Do you understand, you stupid, ugly wolf?!”

Kai was unmoving. His eyebrows were drawn together, one of them slightly more arched than the other.

Sehun pressed his finger deeper into Kai’s chest. “Who do you think you are?” he mumbled. “You’re just a little bully. A little jerk who’s nothing. And I will hurt you. I hurt bullies. And I don’t like you very much right now. So, _you_ go home! I am going further into the woods until I find a Rexit that wants to kill me. And you can do nothing about it! You go cuddle your carrottop.”

Kai shook his head, rolling his eyes. “Right,” he let out before he crouched and grappled an arm around Sehun before throwing him over his shoulder. Sehun gasped and gripped onto Kai’s shoulder.

“What are you doing?!” he screamed. “This is kidnapping!”

As soon as they were out of the woods, Sehun heard Yixing’s voice from the dirt driveway.

“Kai?”

“Hey,” Kai told his brother nonchalantly while Sehun struggled to free himself. “Want to help me tie up a certain drunk Omega?”

Yixing grinned mischievously. “Does the bear shit in the woods? I’ll go get the rope and Jaehyun.”

Sehun was sure he was not drunk enough to be imagining all of this.


	22. Chapter 22

“Is this legal?” Jaehyun asked as he grabbed the other end of the rope Kai tossed him while Yixing held Sehun to the tree.

“Are you guys kidding me?” Sehun grunted at the brothers, who were winding the rope around him and the tree.

“Maybe at least now, you won’t wander around the town during your Calor,” Kai said. “Or hang out with your Rexit friends.”

“Ew, Kai. Don’t say that word,” said Yixing, shuddering as he held Sehun’s arms down.

“What? Calor?” Kai repeated.

“Yeah. It’s gross.”

“It’s not gross,” Sehun yapped. “You can’t just… say stuff like that!”

He heard Jaehyun snicker from behind. “You have no idea how many times I’ve dreamed about doing this to you,” said Jaehyun.

“You’ve _dreamed_ about it?!” Sehun cried. “Why?”

“Because you’ve always been such a bossy little jerk.”

“He’s not wrong,” said Yixing with a shrug. “I didn’t really like how you used to boss my baby brother around.”

“I didn’t… boss him around.”

The front porch light turned on then before the door opened and Hana stepped out with Chanri.

Kai, Yixing, and Jaehyun froze at once.

“What on earth are you doing?” It was Chanri who asked that.

“Jaehyun, Kai, get rid of the rope,” Hana ordered sternly.

“We’re just having some fun, Mom,” said Jaehyun. “He’s sloshed like a goat.”

“This isn’t funny,” Chanri spat. “Let him go.”

With a loud huff, Jaehyun pulled the rope away from Sehun as Yixing released him. Sehun straightened up and brushed the dirt off his pants. He then scowled at Kai, realizing he was almost completely sober now.

“You three get back inside,” said Hana without a hint of humour in her face. “Chanri, accompany Sehun back to his own home.”

“I can get home by myself,” Sehun argued but Chanri stepped forward and curled a hand around his arm, anyway.

“Steady now,” Chanri muttered as she hauled him away from the driveway.

“Let go,” Sehun grumbled and yanked his arm free as they started toward his house. Chanri frowned, but she did release him. Sehun staggered ahead of her, cursing under his breath.

“Something wrong, Sehun?” she asked.

“Why are you talking to me?” Sehun spat angrily.

“Well, should I not be?”

He came to a halt and turned around to pin her with an indignant glower. “Shouldn’t you all be staying away from _me_? The big scary Aequus Omega that could apparently ruin all of your lives?”

Chanri cocked an eyebrow. “I don’t think you’re as drunk as you should be to be venting like this in the middle of the road.” She smiled. She was right.

Sehun rolled his eyes and turned on his heel to meander his way to his house.

“You couldn’t ruin our lives, Sehun,” Chanri said after a while, walking up to his side. “Just Kai’s.”

“Splendid,” Sehun muttered. “Then maybe we can call it even.”

When Chanri raised a hand to his back to give it a rub, Sehun voiced no objection to it. He had missed her. Just like he missed everyone in that stupid family.

“Wolves are a rowdy pack,” she said. “You know that. Don’t mind what they did tonight.” She was grinning again.

“I don’t mind that,” Sehun said. “What I do mind is… you all acting like I don’t matter.”

“You do matter,” said Chanri as they reached his home. She did not come past the fences. “But you won’t understand the pressure we’re under.”

“Why? Because of the Rexits? Oakenbury is big enough for both of you. Why can’t you all just play nice?”

“It doesn’t work like that.” Chanri frowned. “I of all people know that… Regnandis must uphold their duties before all else.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not a Regnandi,” Sehun said. “I don’t care about your duties.” He spun around to walk away. He wasn’t sure if it were entirely the truth. If he didn’t care, he wouldn’t be so troubled by everything that concerned the Regnandis.

“He still loves you, you know,” Chanri said. “Apparently more than… any of us loved our Soulbinders.”

Sehun stopped but did not look back at her, with a hand in a pocket of his jeans, searching for the keys. “You and I both know that’s not really true.”

“I had a Soulbinder. Well, technically I still do. But I also love Don. Love is very… subjective for most of us. Even if our soul is only mated with a single soul. Kai’s… love for you is something completely different. It boggles our minds. He says nothing comes before the pack for him now. But take my word for it. He will not hesitate for a single second to leave it again for you if it came down to it. He’s made up his mind since he was eleven, Sehun. He doesn’t show it. But he’s more strong-willed than any of us. I don’t think the rest of us could have held on to our humanity for three years in our wolves. But he did. Because that human part of him was clinging onto its love for you.”

With that, she walked back to her house.

Sehun stood on his porch for longer than a few minutes, digesting her words. Even if he wanted to believe them, he didn’t see the point. Kai had made it clear that they should stay away from each other. If Chanri were right, then Kai was asking Sehun to stay away from him because he couldn’t stay away from Sehun.

Either way, Sehun was ready to give up on all of this.

* * *

He heard the doorbell ring at around seven in the morning. Clambering out of the bed, he went to get the door, still clad in the clothes from last night.

Sara beamed brightly, her fancy blouse and skirt crisp like the morning air. “Good morning, sleepyhead,” she chimed and pushed past him to enter the house with a bag in her hand. “I brought breakfast bagels.”

With his face scrunched up, Sehun shut the door and scratched the back of his head. “Sara, what are you doing here so early?”

“I have to go back to the city first thing tomorrow morning to meet up with a client. So, we have until then to get you all primped up.”

“I have work at ten,” Sehun groaned, rummaging through the bag she had brought for the bagels.

“Call in sick.”

“I can’t.”

“Sehun,” she whined. “It’s about time you started looking good again. And later tonight, Taeyong and I are taking you to the bar to...” She paused to grin and poke her fingers into Sehun’s abdomen. “Meet some cute guys or girls. Whichever you prefer.”

“I prefer to be left alone.”

“Well, tough.” She started shoving him toward the bathroom. “Go take a quick shower. We’ll hit the town for some new clothes and shoes. Maybe a perfume to hide that cheese stench, which is definitely not that bad anymore.”

“That’s because I’m almost done with my… Calor period.”

“Calor?”

“It’s what’s the wolves call it.”

Sara blinked. “Huh. I see. Now, quick. Shower!”

They spent all morning in the town, browsing every store there possibly was. They didn’t have a wide selection in a small, abysmal town like Oakenbury. But Sara was determined to make it work. She called Kali herself and told that Sehun was too hungover to come in today. Then she spent the next hour squealing about how sexy Kali sounded over the phone.

By midday, they returned to Sehun’s place with enough clothes for two wardrobes. While Sara rifled through Sehun’s wardrobe to get rid of anything she deemed unworthy of wearing, Sehun sat on the bed and patiently waited for her to be done.

“I talked to Chanri last night,” he blurted out at one point.

“What’d she say?” Sara asked, pulling out a jumper and grimacing at it before she discarded it on the floor.

Sehun rubbed the back of his neck. “She said that… Kai was still in love with me. And that he loved me more than anyone who ever loved their Soulbinder.”

Sara turned around, eyes widened. “What?”

Sehun pursed his lips.

“And… do you believe her?”

Sehun said nothing at first. Then at length, he muttered, “He told me himself that his… heart would always belong to me.”

“Do you believe him?” She crossed her arms over her chest.

“Not really,” Sehun lied.

Sara perched on the bed beside him and was lost in her own thoughts for a moment. “Be honest, Sehun. Do _you_ still love him? Putting all of this Soulbinding nonsense aside. How do _you_ feel about him?”

Sehun was silent for a very long minute. He thought of the young boy who followed him around everywhere he went. He thought of the boy who brought him flowers. Soulbinder or not, Kai had won Sehun’s heart through sheer effort and persistence for _years_. In comparison, Sehun had given him crumbs.

“I don’t know,” Sehun whispered.

“I think you do,” Sara said with a smile and gave his shoulder a squeeze. “Now, let’s get you out of these clothes.”

* * *

Sehun stood before the mirror and wordlessly stared at his reflection. He had to give it to Sara. She had made him look like a human again.

She had even styled his hair neatly with the hair gel she had bought for him earlier. Then she had made him put on a maroon shirt along with some black jeans.

“There,” she said after she was done rolling up his sleeves to his elbows.

A tiny smile formed on Sehun’s lips and Sara caught it.

“You’re happy,” she said, clapping her hands together.

“Shut up,” Sehun mumbled.

“And you look handsome, damn. I swear, if you weren’t into mean wolf boys, I would have taken you home with me tonight.”

“Kai wasn’t a mean wolf boy,” Sehun argued.

“He’s one now.”

Sehun shrugged.

They did hit the bar later that night. It wasn’t crowded. It never usually was. They easily spotted Taeyong at a table.

“Hey, okay, wow,” Taeyong let out, gawking at Sehun as he and Sara walked up to the table. “So, you finally took a shower, huh?”

“I didn’t look that bad, for god’s sake,” Sehun hissed, taking his seat.

“No. But you look _great_ now, man,” said Taeyong. “You should wear your hair like that. Pushed back.”

They ordered their drinks.

“Okay. Now, let’s get down to business,” said Sara. “I know there isn’t a wide option for you over here. But that cute girl is staring at you.” She nudged her elbow into Sehun’s side. “Two o’clock.”

Sehun looked in that direction and found a brunette staring at him. “She’s an Aequus,” he muttered, taking a sip of the Long Island Iced Tea he ordered.

“Oh. Is that a no?” Taeyong asked.

Sehun glanced at the girl again. She was very pretty but he couldn’t tell if she was staring at him because she was interested in him or because he was another Aequus.

“That’s a no,” he said.

“Okay.” Taeyong pulled out a notepad and a pen from his bag. “Let’s nail down the specifics. Maybe that’ll narrow things down for us. What kind of person are you looking for?”

“Ooh!” Sara yapped instead. “A wolf, preferably.”

“All right. Wolf.” Taeyong jotted it down.

“And a man.”

“A man. Okay. What else?”

“With a nice, big family.”

“Nice, big family. Mm-hm.”

Sehun rubbed his forehead. “Guys, please stop,” he murmured.

Sara continued. “A pack. He loves a good pack.”

“A pack. What about physical appearance?” Taeyong said.

“Oh, yes. Of course. Hmmm. Let me think. Has to be tall. With good hair. Most likely dark-haired.”

“Guys,” Sehun groaned. “I’m going to murder you two.”

“Tall. Good, dark hair. What else?”

“Abs. I think our boy likes him some nice abs. Just an overall athletic body,” Sara listed down.

“Okay. That narrows our candidates,” Taeyong said, clearing his throat. “How about personality-wise?”

“Has to be nice to Sehun.”

“A nice man.”

“Yep.”

Sehun wanted to get up and leave.

“Could be either an Alpha or a Beta,” said Sara.

“All righty.” Taeyong flashed his teeth. “Based on these descriptions, I’d say Sehun’s dream man in Oakenbury would have to be Yixing, Jaehyun, Don, Kai, Kali.”

“Okay, let’s see. Kali doesn’t really have a big pack. And he’s kinda old. So, not him,” said Sara.

“ _Sara_ ,” Sehun spat through his teeth.

“Don is married,” Sara proceeded. “So, not him. Yixing is busy with a baby. So, he probably won’t have time for Sehun right now.”

“Then that leaves us Jaehyun and Kai.”

“Jaehyun has never been nice to anyone,” Sara pointed out.

Taeyong scratched the name off the list. “Then we’re down to just one eligible bachelor in this town who can breed you.”

“Stop!” Sehun snarled. “God, please. Stop.”

“Holy guacamole,” Taeyong let out suddenly, his eyes darting over Sehun’s shoulder. “Yeah. Maybe we should stop.” He quickly stuffed the notepad back into his bag.

“What’s wrong?” Sara asked and turned her head around.

Sehun did not have to look back to know what was wrong. He smelled the scent before anything.

“Sara, maybe you should hold Sehun down,” Taeyong muttered nervously. “And let’s make sure nothing sharp is within his reach.”

Sehun lifted his head to look at Kai and the stranger who was holding his hand as they approached the table.

“Hey, Kai,” Sara cooed obnoxiously. “Fancy… seeing you here.”

Kai blinked at her, then bowed his head. Sehun glared at the human boy at Kai’s side. He had big eyes and faint brown hair that was almost red.

“So, who’s this?” Taeyong asked, grinning weirdly. Sehun heard Sara kick her brother’s leg under the table.

“Uh,” Kai drawled, glancing at the stranger.

“I’m Greg,” said the guy.

“Yeah. Greg,” Kai muttered. “You’re in town, Sara.” Sehun kept his head low, fingers gripping his glass aggressively.

“Yeah. Just until tomorrow,” said Sara. “It’s nice… seeing you.”

Kai was staring at Sehun now. Sehun fought the urge to lob the drink at the wolf’s face. “Hey, Sehun,” he said stoically.

Sehun, clenching his jaw, brought his head up and forced a smile at the man. “Hey, Kai. And… _Greg_ ,” he said disgustedly.

Kai’s eyebrows rose and fell fast. “Well, we’ll leave you alone.”

Taeyong giggled. “Thanks. You have fun, too.”

Kai walked away, pulling _Greg_ away with him. Sehun continued to glower at them as they settled at a table. Greg must be saying something funny. Because Kai was pretending to be laughing!

“Thanks? You have fun, too?” Sara said, mocking Taeyong. “What the hell was that?”

“I don’t know. I panicked.” Taeyong scratched his head. “Who is _Greg_?”

“Yeah. I thought he’s with that… other gingerhead,” mused Sara.

“They’re not exclusive,” Sehun grumbled, swigging the drink. “I don’t care.”

Sara frowned. “Sorry. This wasn’t… a very good idea, was it?”

Sehun shrugged. He looked away from Kai. “Like I said. I really… don’t care.” He stood up. “I’m going to go talk to that Aequus girl.”

“What?” Sara gasped. “Sehun, you shouldn’t do it just for the sake of it.”

“I can handle this, Sara.”

He knew he couldn’t. The last time he had had anything to do with a girl was when he was a teenager. Even then, he had no clue what he was doing.

The brunette flushed pink and turned away when she saw him walking up to her. “Hey,” he said, leaning an elbow on the bar counter.

“Hey,” she said with a shy smile.

“Can I, um, buy you a drink?”

“Can _I_ buy _you_ a drink?” came a voice from behind him.

Confused and curious, Sehun turned around to meet a pair of black eyes and a lopsided grin. An Aequus Beta. He pinned Sehun with a lecherous look.

“Uh…”

The Aequus girl moved to stand by the black-eyed guy as he wrapped an arm around her waist.

“Oh,” Sehun let out.

“I’m Matt. This is my girlfriend, Tori,” the Beta said.

Sehun sighed heavily. “Yeah. Sorry. I was unaware of this dynamic.”

“It’s cool,” Matt chortled. “We’re always… down to have some fun.”

Sehun stared at the couple who were smirking at him. “Oh… _Oh_! I’m sorry, I’m not into… whatever you’re proposing.” He glanced at Kai and _Greg_ again. Greg was whispering something into Kai’s ear and laughing. Kai’s hands were resting on the table.

Sehun’s stomach turned.

“You sure?” Tori asked.

Sehun faced the couple. “Pretty sure. Excuse me.” He pulled away from the bar counter and hurried toward the exit.

“Sehun?” Sara called as she pursued him. “Where are you going?”

Catching his arm, she turned him around. “I can’t,” he spat out. “I can’t act like I’m okay with this. God, I feel sick.” His eyes flitted to Kai once more. Kai was now looking at him with a frown.

“Sehun—” Sara tried to stop him, but Sehun hurtled away.

As soon as he was out of the bar, he kept walking until he reached a dark alley to hide away from the rest of the world. He clasped a hand over his mouth and swallowed a sob.

“Look what we have here.”

Sehun averted his attention to the two Rexits that were ambling across the alleyway.

“An Omega in its Calor,” said one of the two men.

Sehun took a deep, tired breath. “Just leave me alone,” he told them.

“Why? Don’t you want to be bred, Omega?” They were both smaller than most Betas Sehun had stumbled upon.

“He said to leave him alone.” Kai’s voice coursed through the alleyway in a vicious command. The Rexits stopped dead in their tracks for a moment. Kai advanced closer to them, his eyes flashing red. He bared his fangs with a low growl that rumbled from his chest.

“Let’s get out of here,” one of the Rexits said before they scampered away.

Sehun scowled when Kai turned to face him, eyes dark again. “‘Leave me alone’ also applies to you,” he told Kai.

Kai’s gaze fell to the leather cord around Sehun’s neck. His eyes narrowed on it.

Sehun huffed. “You told me to stay away but _you_ keep following me around.”

Kai closed the distance between them. With his back pressed to the alley’s wall, Sehun stared into Kai’s eyes that kept flickering from brown to red and vice versa every second.

“You’re… wearing it,” Kai exhaled breathlessly, still gawking at Sehun’s neck. “Why?”

 _Because I love you, you idiot,_ Sehun wanted to say. But he wasn’t sure what that could entail and if it would change anything. Did he even want anything changed?

Then he saw Kai’s eyes glisten. He had never looked so miserable and content simultaneously. When he raised a hand to gently cup Sehun’s cheek, Sehun went still as a statue. He felt Kai’s thumb softly caress his cheekbone.

He was holding his breath. And apparently Kai was too as he neared even closer. So close that Sehun could feel the heat of Kai’s skin upon his own. Their hearts were thundering. Kai slid his hand from Sehun’s cheek to the back of his neck. Then Sehun felt Kai’s hot breath graze his lips. He clenched his eyes tight, a hand rising to rest against Kai’s chest. His lips parted on their own Kai kissed them.

The whole world seemed to have slipped away around them as their lips met. There were firecrackers in Sehun’s heart. It was as though his soul had finally found its way. And Kai must have felt the same because his grip tightened around the nape of Sehun’s neck.

His lips tenderly kissed Sehun’s, taking their sweet time to savour each of Sehun’s lips. Sehun wanted to believe that he had died and gone to heaven.

His hand flew up to clutch at Kai’s hair as they kissed, not bothering to take breaths. Sehun wanted to melt into Kai’s body that arched into his own.

When they came apart, they panted for air and Sehun chased Kai’s lips for more. Kai grabbed Sehun’s jaw roughly and kissed him hard now. Sehun almost moaned out Kai’s name into the kiss before Kai pulled away and rubbed a hand down his face, chest heaving.

Sehun had gone still against the wall, dazed and jaded. His lips were throbbing lightly. His lungs felt like they might implode.


	23. Chapter 23

He was losing. And he _hated_ losing to Kai. Which was almost always.

His thumbs punched into the game controller violently with a guttural groan rumbling from his chest as he struggled to win the battle.

He had one life left. And so did Kai. But the wolf boy was closer to winning than Sehun was.

 _“Yes! Yes!”_ Kai yipped with excitement, almost hopping on his bed, making the mattress jiggle. He was only twelve. How was he so good at this, Sehun wondered. Well, if he owned a video game console, he supposed he would be as good as Kai was at gaming.

But Kai was going to win this round. Again. Sehun gritted his teeth annoyedly. It usually angered him. However, today, so much was at stake. He could not afford to lose.

 _“Not so hard, Sehun,”_ Kai muttered as Sehun continued to attack his controller with an unnecessary amount of aggression. _“You’re going to break it.”_

He did not care. He wanted to win.

In a spasm of frustration, Sehun briefly released one hand from his controller and reached for Kai’s.

 _“Hey!”_ Kai cried, pulling away from Sehun when the latter tried to sabotage his concentration. _“That’s cheating!”_

While he lost control, Sehun quickly grabbed his own controller with both hands again and K.O.-ed Kai’s player.

He then gasped. _“I won! I won!”_ Tossing the controller aside, Sehun jumped to his feet and bounced on the bed, flailing his arms in the air as a call for celebration. _“I win! You lose! I win! You lose!”_

When he had finally stopped hollering with victory, he looked down at Kai on the bed and found the little boy to be frowning up at Sehun.

 _“That’s not fair, Sehun,”_ he muttered miserably.

 _“Whatever,”_ Sehun spat and plumped back down on the bed, still grinning from ear to ear. _“You don’t know many things, wolf. Let me teach you. When you want something so bad, you have to get it. You have to!”_

Kai was even sadder now. He set the controller aside and hugged his knees to his chest. _“Even if the way of achieving it is wrong and mean?”_

 _“Yes,”_ Sehun said confidently, crawling over to Kai. _“You must do everything you have to.”_

Kai grimaced then. _“Who taught you that?”_

Sara did. She looked him in the eye and said, _“I didn’t want to cheat at the exams. But if I don’t get a B in Science this time too, my parents will kill me. So, I did what had to be done.”_

But Sehun was not going to let Kai know that he had to be taught by someone else to be so wise. _“No one. I learned it myself.”_ He loomed over Kai next, still smiling arrogantly. _“You lost the bet.”_

_“Only because you cheated!”_

_“Well, you never said I can’t cheat. You did not lay out the rules clearly and that is_ your _fault. Isn’t it?”_

Guilt-tripping the boy _always_ worked. And Sehun took such great pride in knowing that he had that grip over the little boy. It made him feel stronger and taller than Kai, an _Alpha_.

 _“Yes. You,”_ Sehun continued to say. _“You said we play a game. If I win a round, you will not eat for a week. If you win, I will give your wolf paw a small kiss. That was the deal.”_

And thank god, Sehun had won. When Kai first named his bet, Sehun shuddered with horror. Kai said Sehun was not brave enough to take on the bet. Even though Sehun did not want to ever kiss a dirty wolf paw, his ego was challenged. He had to prove to Kai that he was a man and Kai was still a boy.

 _“I can’t… go a week without eating… anything,”_ Kai then whispered, eyes sad and disappointed.

 _“Well then why did you accept the bet?!”_ Sehun knew Kai would not go a day without eating. He just wanted to see the boy’s pride crumble. _“You’re such a weak little wolf.”_ He groaned and climbed out of the bed.

 _“Wait, Sehun,”_ Kai mewled. _“It was… bet. And I had made a promise.”_ He hung his head, lips pouting. _“I won’t eat for a week.”_

Sehun did not believe him. So, he scoffed and rolled his eyes. _“Good luck with that.”_

 _“Can’t we have a rematch?”_ the boy tried asking.

 _“No!”_ Sehun yapped. _“I won. Fair and square.”_

Kai frowned. _“Fair and square?”_

 _“Yes. Bye. I have to go home now. My mother and I are making gumbo. Delicious, delicious gumbo, which I’ll have for tonight.”_ He stuck his tongue out at Kai, picked up his schoolbag and hared out of the room.

By the time he reached his own home, his mother had already started making dinner.

 _“Sehun,”_ she called from the kitchen.

Dropping his schoolbag on the couch, Sehun hurried to the kitchen where he found his mother chopping up vegetables. _“Hey, Mom.”_ He climbed onto the stool at the kitchen island and watched his mother skilfully dice the carrots.

 _“So, how is Kai?”_ she inquired with a quirky grin.

 _“He’s all right.”_ Sehun shrugged.

_“And how was your playdate?”_

_“It wasn’t a… play… date.” His cheeks darkened with embarrassment._

_“That’s not what I meant,”_ she chuckled.

 _“We had a bet. I won.”_ He clambered down the stool to wash his hands at the sink. _“He lost so bad. You should have seen his face, Mom! He was about to cry! Like a baby. Such a baby. Are we sure he’s an Alpha?”_

 _“Well, he’s still a child,”_ his mother said. _“He will grow up, Sehun. And he won’t be crying like a baby anymore.”_

_“Whatever. I don’t think he will ever be a great Alpha like his father. And if that was a bet, I’d win that bet, too!”_

His mother laughed and gave his head a ruffle. _“The way you pretend like you don’t fancy him or find him charming just to make yourself look tougher will always be beyond me.”_

Sehun blinked. His chest did a thing. He did not exactly know what thing but it kind of hurt. He then scowled angrily at his mother. _“I do not fancy him! He’s only a friend.”_

_“Sara and Taeyong are your friends. You’re never so judge-y about them.”_

_“That’s because they are not big, rich, loud wolves that keep sniffing me every chance they get!”_

His mother raised her hands in defeat, one holding a knife. _“All right. All right. I was wrong. Do you want to help me put these into the pot?”_

Sehun perked up at once and nodded enthusiastically.

* * *

The gumbo turned out to be the most delicious food Sehun had ever put in his mouth. He even ate all his vegetables this time.

 _“Slow down, Sehun,”_ his father said, smirking from the other side of the table. _“No one’s going to take your food away.”_

And if anyone tried to, Sehun would kill them.

He ate his dinner heartily that night and eventually wondered what the Regnandis were having for dinner tonight. They always had fancy meals with names Sehun could not even pronounce. Like foie gras and pappardelle. But they never tasted as good as they looked.

Then he wondered if Kai actually kept his word. That was highly unluckily. Wolves were hungry all the time. He would have already caved.

 _“Sehun spent some time with Kai today,”_ his mother told his father.

The man arched an eyebrow in Sehun’s way.

 _“We were playing video games,”_ Sehun said.

 _“Don’t go over there too often to play games,”_ his father chided gently. _“Did you finish your homework?”_

 _“Yes, Daddy,”_ Sehun muttered, lowered his head.

_“Good. You cannot play video games with Kai every afternoon, do you understand?”_

Sehun only nodded his head this time.

After dinner, he brushed his teeth, peed, and shrugged into his pyjamas. When he was in bed that night, he did not fall asleep with ease. He was troubled by his thoughts.

He _had_ cheated. It was not a fair win.

His face and heart crumpled with guilt as he hugged his blanket. He supposed there was logic behind his reasoning for winning by cheating, but it actually felt wrong. Kai was better at him at video games. That was just the fact. This victory did not feel like a victory at all. The guilt twisted in Sehun’s chest.

Sometimes, it was better to not to get what he wanted by whatever means possible. Sometimes, there were right and wrong to consider. And the victims of his actions. He felt bad that night. He hoped Kai would still play video games with him again after this.

The guilt was a little overwhelming. He hid his face in the pillow and shed a few tears because he really had been mean and unfair to Kai today.

* * *

The next morning, as he got ready for school, his mother force-fed him a chicken sandwich, even though he was still very full from last night’s dinner.

 _“Mom,”_ he whined with a full mouth. _“I’m going to be late.”_

 _“You’ve got plenty of time, Sehun,”_ his mother said. Grumbling, Sehun stuffed the rest of the sandwich into his mouth and gave his mother a quick kiss on the cheek before he hurried out of the house.

While he grabbed his bike, he smelled Chanri’s scent that wafted in his way. He turned around and found the Alpha walking towards his house with furious strides.

 _“Chanri?”_ he called excitedly and hurtled over to the fence. Chanri, like the other Regnandis, never crossed the fence or the gate. _“What are you doing here?”_

 _“You little rascal_ ,” she snapped and caught Sehun’s ear.

 _“Ow!”_ screamed Sehun and squirmed as Kai’s sister gave his ear a light pinch. _“Ow! Ow! Ow!”_

 _“Oh, relax. I’m not even twisting it,”_ she said and withdrew her hand.

Sehun rubbed his reddened ear, frowning. _“Why are you mad… at me?”_ he asked nervously.

 _“You had a bet with my baby brother and now he’s starving himself, refusing to eat!”_ She sounded really angry. Sehun had never seen her so angry. _“And you won by cheating?!”_

_“No!”_

_“And now you’re lying?!”_

Sehun pursed his lips, looking at her sadly. _“I… I… didn’t think… he’d follow… through.”_

_“Well, he has. And Mom sent me to get you. You’re going to come with me now and tell him you lost the bet and you’re going to get him to eat something.”_

Sehun exhaled heavily. _“Okay… I’m really sorry.”_

Chanri crossed her arms over her chest. _“You cannot bully him around all the time just because he literally worships you, Sehun. Okay? He thinks the world of you. And he’d do anything to please you. Like starving himself to death!”_

Sehun doubted that Kai would actually die just because he skipped dinner last night. But he was still a kid nonetheless. God, Sehun could not think how bad his tummy would feel if he was sent to be without dinner.

Or the cookie that he got after dinner for supper.

After he had gotten his bike, he walked it to the house at the end of the street with Chanri at his side.

 _“He just came back from his run,”_ said Chanri when they reached her home. _“He’s somewhere in the backyard.”_

Sehun nodded and wandered around the house.

He found a white pup sitting under a tree in the backyard that extended into the forest. Kai was cleaning his paws, dragging his tongue all over them. His snoot twitched a moment later, and his ears perked up attentively.

_Sehun. Sehun. Sehun._

Sehun heard the tiny wolf’s song immediately before the white wolf’s head craned up to look at him with wide, red eyes.

Sehun scratched the back of his neck as he approached Kai. Stopping a foot before the pup, he embarrassedly said, _“You, um… should eat.”_

The wolf turned its head away before resting it on a paw, letting out a heavy breath through its nostrils. Its following songs suggested that it was not going to eat.

Sehun lowered to a crouch and poked a finger into the wolf’s belly. The finger disappeared in its thick, soft fur.

  _“I’m sorry,”_ Sehun muttered, not really wanting or liking to apologize. He convinced himself that he just wanted to appease Chanri again. Because he cared about what Chanri thought of him. Not about Kai.

The wolf lifted its head again and tried to playfully bite Sehun’s hand that was touching its tummy.

 _“I did cheat,”_ Sehun then admitted defeatedly. _“And I would have lost. Well, maybe. We wouldn’t know that for sure. Maybe I could have won.”_

The wolf’s red eyes were staring at Sehun now. It sang.

_Pretty! Pretty! Sad! But pretty!_

Sehun wasn’t sure what the wolf was referring to.

 _“Anyway, I lost the bet,”_ Sehun said. _“So, you should eat now.”_

The pup rose then, standing up to its feet before it raised a paw and pressed it to Sehun’s knee.

_Kiss._

Sehun gasped. _“No,”_ he mewled.

The wolf did not remove its paw. Then with a scowl and a groan, Sehun conceded defeat. He would get Kai back for this.

Picking the paw up, Sehun surveyed the dirt sticking to it. But beneath it were pink jellybeans. Kai’s paws looked like jellybeans. Sehun made a face and with a sigh, he clenched his eyes tightly and pressed his lips to the dirty paw.

 _“Blergh!”_ he then retched and shot up to his feet, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. The wolf howled happily. _“Let’s have another bet! I will win this time!”_

* * *

His cold, trembling fingers fumbled with the keys for a moment as he stood on the doorstep, trying strenuously not to make a fool out of himself.

It was not the first time he had tried to bring a boy home. But it was the first time he had brought the boy he really liked home. Ironically, he also resented the same guy for the hell he was put through.

When he was finally successful, he pushed the door open and stood still to take some breaths. Then he turned around nervously and faced Kai who had driven home after that… that…

After what happened in the alley.

It had happened. For real. And yet, Sehun was still trying to convince himself that it was all but a dream. A really complicated dream.

It did not stop the butterflies from flitting wildly in his stomach and chest, though.

Kai stood on the porch with his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket, eyes furtive and solemn. He looked nervous, too. They had not even spoken to each other on the trip back home.

But if Sehun were being honest, he was a very tired of trying to speak to the man.

He cleared his throat and mustered the courage. “Do you want to… come in?” he offered in a low voice, even though he knew Kai was already planning on coming in. “Or… would you rather go back to… _Greg_?”

Kai licked his lips and walked forward. Sehun calmed his breathing and stepped aside as Kai let himself into the house.

Sehun remained outside for a beat to compose himself before he entered the house and locked the front door behind him. Without stopping to talk to Kai, he hurriedly started for his bedroom.

Reaching it, he took his jacket off and made himself look busy with the wardrobe. He heard and smelled Kai enter the bedroom.

But then he said nothing. He just stood in the middle of the room and stared at Sehun’s back.

As much as Sehun did not want to think about the kiss, he could not possibly forget it when he still taste the heat of Kai’s mouth upon his own. And Kai’s scent was clinging to his own clothes. He was already at the end of Calor but this was certainly not helping his blood stay calm.

“I’m sorry,” he heard Kai say suddenly. He stopped but did not turn around to face Kai. “I… I don’t know if… Actually, I don’t know anything anymore.” He sounded pitiful. “You’re wearing the locket. But you… you don’t want me. And I shouldn’t have kissed you because I don’t want to… want us to…” he trailed off. Then sighing, he said, “I’m just so… confused.”

Sehun turned around. The instant his eyes met Kai’s, he was reminded of those innocent days he used to look into those eyes and see if he could find the wolf. And the days he tried to look into the red ones to see if he could find the boy. He always did.

His life was colourful. He saw colours around his parents, around his two best friends, around Kai, around the Regnandis. Because they were his world. His happiness.

Now, his life was just a monochromatic shithole.

But when Kai had kissed him, all those colours had returned to him briefly. Yellow, orange, red, blue, green, purple. He saw them all.

“So, why did you kiss me, then?” he asked in a dead tone. “If you didn’t want to? If you believe there’s still so much you’d lose because of me?”

Kai had no answer.

Sehun wondered if Chanri had been right the other night. About Kai being able to leave everything behind and risking it all in the blink of an eye if Sehun wanted him to. Perhaps that was why Kai was always on his guard, trying to stay away from Sehun and yet failing time and again.

Sehun was like a song his heart could not ignore.

“I’m sorry we kissed,” Kai then said.

Sehun scowled. “I’m not.” And the next thing he knew, he was crossing the room. His hands flung up to grip the collars of Kai’s shirt as his mouth crashed against Kai’s in a violent mess. And he saw those colours again.

_alpha!alpha!alpha!_

Kai groaned, hands catching Sehun’s waist as he staggered a step back when Sehun started kissing him aggressively. He could not hold himself back. He no longer wanted to. He wanted to see if he could make Kai’s pride crumble.

And then Kai growled against Sehun’s lips before he pushed forward and returned Sehun’s kiss with twice the desperation and hunger. His arms tightened around Sehun’s waist, and Sehun even felt the wolf’s fangs scrape his bottom lip.

“Sehun, stop,” Kai panted all of a sudden and pulled away. He shook his head jadedly and clasped his fingers over his mouth. Sehun caught his breath, lips throbbing lightly. His head was spinning, and his knees were about to buckle. And Kai looked like his were about to, too. “We shouldn’t…”

Sehun braced himself. “You already know this. But if I must spell it out to you, then I will. I hate you. I hate you so much. All of you. For treating me like I meant nothing to you. I hate you for believing that I could just _move_ _on_. I hate you but I still love—”

“I don’t want to hear it,” Kai cut him off, growling. He turned his face away from Sehun. “Please. Please. I’m begging you. Don’t.”

Sehun stopped himself then, blinking at the man. Chanri was right…

“Kai…”

“We should just let things be the way there are,” he said shakily. “You threw away everything that reminded you of me, the little nest you were building for us out on the sidewalk like all those years meant nothing. You brought some guy home before we had even broken up and while I was still blindly hoping that there would be a future for us. You made me go back. And I did. And I killed my father. We can’t turn things around. Not anymore.”

Sehun broke down at that. “Why… did you… kiss me, then?” he asked weakly.

Kai lifted his eyes that were brimming with tears. “Because you’re my Soulbinder, Sehun,” he let out, passing a hand over his face. “I am _trying_ to stay away from you. I can’t. But I am trying.”

“Then let’s just stop trying.” Sehun took a step forward. “I know there’s just too much damage done for us to move on like nothing happened. But we can put it all past us and start afresh.”

Kai’s gaze bored into Sehun’s. Then at length, he shook his head and retreated. “I’m too scared for you to do that.”

“I don’t need you to protect me anymore, Kai. Yes, I did tell you to go away and never come back. I was mad! I felt cheated and snubbed! You threw me away and then came back out of nowhere after years. I understood nothing because you didn’t tell me anything.” He quickly wiped a tear that rolled down his cheek. “I didn’t know… you left your pack… I didn’t know the hell you must have gone through after that. Because you didn’t tell me, Kai. Even when we were younger, you never told me the bad stuff. You always shared only your happiness with me. The more we try to stay away from each other, the more it hurts.”

Kai closed his eyes momentarily, face flushed with grievance. When he opened them again, he lunged at Sehun, caught the latter by the neck and slammed him back against the wardrobe before he crushed Sehun’s lips beneath his own in a rough, greedy kiss while his hand tightened around Sehun’s throat.


	24. Chapter 24

Sehun needed to hear him say it. He needed Kai to say it all out loud.

_I’ve missed you. I want you. I love you._

A part of him wanted to break Kai’s walls and crumble his pride along with his silence. But he did not want to hurt the man even more.

Kai’s body pressed into him and burned. His hand moved from the neck to latch itself onto Sehun’s waist. He kissed Sehun with everything he had, pulling Sehun’s hips closer to his own.

Sehun tried to keep up with the vigour of Kai’s lips as they skipped past his, sucking each of them, leaving them swollen and throbbing. When they had finally run out of breath, Kai pulled back, gasping for air, before he tilted his head to smash his mouth against Sehun’s neck. He kissed, sniffed, growled against it with a tight grip around Sehun’s waist, trapping him between his body and the wardrobe.

“Kai,” Sehun panted and grabbed the sides of the wolf’s head to draw it back up. Kai kissed his full on the mouth once more, hard and desperately, but he was still holding himself back a little.

“You have no idea how long… I’ve waited,” Kai snarled upon Sehun’s lips, bringing a fist to rap against the wardrobe near Sehun’s head. He then rested his forehead against Sehun and heaved for breath, eyes closed and lips parted. “Fuck.”

For a moment, Sehun thought he might back away. But instead, Kai regained his composure and his breaths, eyes slitting open just enough to meet Sehun’s wide, astonished ones. Withdrawing his hand from the wardrobe, Kai cupped a side of Sehun’s face and gently kissed brushed their lips together before he kissed the skin beneath Sehun’s lower lip, then his cheeks, then his eyes and eventually, his forehead.

“You told me to go away,” Kai whispered, and as he shut his eyes, a teardrop trickled down his cheek. Sehun’s hands dropped from Kai’s face and settled on his shoulders.

“You left me,” muttered Sehun. He was miserable. But so was Kai. And right now, he wasn’t sure if it were Kai’s misery he was feeling. In spite of what he was told, they were a pack. They were fated to be a pack. Always. He was as much as Kai’s pack as Kai was his. “I was angry. I felt… betrayed. _I go wherever you go._ ”

Kai swallowed hard and another tear fell from his eyes. “And _I go wherever you go_ ,” he echoed.

“So many promises, Kai.”

“I was never going to break any of them,” Kai said, eyes opening to meet Sehun’s with tears glistening in them. “I didn’t want to. And… a part of my soul will forever be lost and broken because of that.”

It killed Sehun to hear that.

Because that was precisely what he felt. A part of his soul broken and lost forever.

He tightened his fists around Kai’s shirt. “Don’t… say that,” he let out. “Then let’s forget about all those promises. We will make new ones.”

“You had every right to resent me,” said Kai, lowering his gaze.

“Even though I know I shouldn’t, I still… do,” Sehun admitted. He knew it was unreasonable for him to hate the man for what had happened. But he could not just brush off all those years of loneliness and sorrow that had scarred him for the rest of his life. Those days he spent in a corner of his room, wrapped up in a ball, thinking about how this was not the life he had had pictured for him. Those days he could still hear his mother’s voice calling him for dinner and his father’s asking him how was school today. Then he’d hear Kai’s voice telling him he’d go wherever Sehun went.

Kai nodded his head shakily but did not pull away. “We’re too broken to be mended,” he said.

“No, we’re not,” Sehun replied. “We’re broken. But it’s not irreparable.”

Kai was holding his breath now, jaw clenching. “I can’t be with you, Sehun,” he then spat through his teeth before he withdrew at last. Sehun almost held onto him. “Fate played a cruel game on us, I know. But the damage is done. And we have to face the consequence.”

“Fine,” Sehun said, scowling. “If you are so afraid, then—”

“I’m afraid _you’ll_ get hurt. And I cannot… betray my pack again. Not after what my father… did for me.”

Sehun realized he could not argue with that. He had no good enough reasons to convince Kai to leave his pack again. He had done it once for Sehun and it had cost him so much. And it was partially Sehun’s own fault that Geun was dead. If only he had not brought that guy home that night and if only he had heard Kai out and not told him to leave. If only he had believed that the pure, genuine Kai he knew would never betray him.

Kai raised a hand to Sehun’s cheek and stroked it softly. Then without saying anything more, he turned around and left.

Sehun slid down the wardrobe and dropped on the floor, hugging his knees to his chest.

* * *

“You’re weak,” spat Jack as he prowled around Sehun amid the trees. “And slow. And skinny. And too emotional. Until today, you also looked like something dragged out of a thrift store. What happened? You finally bought a hairbrush?”

 Sehun gritted his teeth. He was sure he did not look _that_ bad before Sara gave him this supposed makeover. “I hope this is making its way to a compliment,” he mumbled, keeping his eyes on the black wolf snarling before him, ears struck down and eyes flashing purple. It was ready to pounce on him for the ninth time. Around them, the sky had started to darken.

Vergel was snickering from where he stood, leaning against a tree, arms crossed over his chest. “Give the Aequus a break, Jack,” he said, although with an amused smirk. “He’s already sweating through his clothes.”

“You will know when a wolf is ready to snap-attack,” Jack said, flicking the back of Sehun’s head. Sehun hissed but did not flinch. “It won’t touch you. But it’s warning you to stay away. It’s defending itself or someone else or something like its territory. But you can’t anticipate this during an actual fight. No warning. You need to be able to move fast to dodge a pin-down.”

Which Sehun had not been able to do since they started training this evening. He had tried running away several times, but Maza always caught up to him. Jack had told him that he was still too slow to outrun a wolf.

“Watch which paw is its dominant paw,” Jack said as he positioned himself behind Sehun. Maza took step forward with her left paw. “If you manage to dodge her pouncing, she’d try to claw you. If she takes her step with the right, then she will use her left to attack you. Which means, you steer to your left to avoid contact.”

Sehun nodded his head with a huge breath. “Okay.”

“All right.”

Maza lunged at him then, growling but with her claws retracted. Sehun moved to his side and dodged her. She did not give him a moment to refocus before she raised a paw and vaulted off the ground to attack Sehun’s head.

“Too slow,” Jack sighed when the paw struck Sehun’s head, sending him to the ground. “You didn’t even look at her step!”

Sehun groaned as a side of his face throbbed. His head lightly pounded. “She’s too… fast.”

“All wolves are, Aequus,” Jack said. “Maybe you should just stick to what you know. Cowering before your Alphas and bending for their affection.”

Sehun gathered himself and stood up, brushing the dirt from his pants. “I do not… do that.”

“Oh,” Jack scoffed. “Don’t take it personally. It’s just something Aequuses are bred to do. It’s the natural order of things.”

Sehun glowered. “Since when do Rexits have respect for the _natural_ order of things?”

Maza shifted back to her human and stepped closer to Sehun. “You don’t want to run your mouth like that over here, boy,” she warned him. Sehun tried to keep his eyes from wandering down her naked body, her dark skin glimmering with sweat under the dusking sky.

“Well, we didn’t really have a choice,” said Vergel. Sehun arched an eyebrow at him. “We were born to Rexits.”

Sehun felt bad then. “I didn’t know.”

“It’s unfair,” grumbled Maza. “We didn’t do anything wrong. But we pay for the wrongs our parents did. Which in hindsight was all the Regnandis’ fault.”

Sehun lowered his head.

“Are we done here?” boomed a voice all of a sudden before Kali emerged from the trees. “It’s getting late. Sehun should be getting home.”

Jack shrugged. “I’m telling you, Kali. This is a waste of time.” He, Maza and Vergel then walked away. Sehun shuddered when Vergel gave his shoulder a comforting clap on his way.

“Sehun, may I have a word with you?” Kali asked when Sehun started back toward the manor. “Have you had a chance to talk to any Aequus in town?”

Sehun rubbed the back of his neck. “Not yet. But I did meet a couple of them the other night. And there’s Mrs. Bianchi. I could also try to get a hold of my relatives.”

Kali bowed his head and ran a hand through his greying hair. “I am going out of town. I leave tomorrow morning and I’ll be back late tomorrow night. I was wondering if you could stay and watch Jax for a little longer tomorrow. I’d take him with me but I’m not sure it’ll be… all that safe for him. Unless you have other plans.”

Sehun… Plans… Ha.

“Of course,” Sehun said. “I’ll watch him until you’re back.”

“Thank you.”

* * *

He came home that night with a few things. A camping mattress, two blankets, and an oil lamp. He could not forget it. He could not get Kai and what had happened last night out of his head. But it had spark a hope that was long extinguished.

After gathering a few more things from the house, he climbed up to the treehouse and started cleaning it up. He got rid of the cobwebs from the corners before he mopped up the dust. Once it was clean enough to eat off of, he dragged the camping mattress and blankets up.

Turning the oil lamp on, he placed the battery-powered radio he had found in the closet on the floor and the stuffed giraffe on the mattress. He then sat on his legs on the floor of the treehouse, knees folded, and stared at the mattress.

It felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest. He remembered his mother telling him how important nesting was to an Omega. It was one of the most precious things for one. Neglecting the nest he had spent years building for so long before getting rid of it completely had left Sehun heartbroken, even though he had always refused to acknowledge it.

But now...

He smiled to himself and drew a hand over the blanketed, thin mattress. He would sleep in it that night, he decided.

When he took out the trash later, he found the porchlight on the house at the end of the street glinting bright in the dark.

And when he turned around after catching a whiff of the strong, metallic stench of blood, his eyes fell on the rabbit that was mauled to death. It was left on his porch, flung over the fence. A dirt trail of wolf paws was printed on the concrete.

Even though Sehun’s heart was hammering against his chest in both confusion and excitement, his head hummed, _fat bunny._

He pulled up a rabbit stew recipe after he went back inside with the dead rabbit.

* * *

 _“My tummy,”_ the white pup chirped exhilarated as it leaped around Sehun in the backyard.

Sehun groaned and shoved the wolf’s face away when it started sniffing the book he was reading. _“Cut it out,”_ he growled at the pup. _“I’m trying to read. We have a test next week. Why aren’t you studying?!”_

 _“Already,”_ sang the wolf, circling Sehun, who sat leaned against a tree, with springy steps.

 _“My tummy!”_ Kai said again.

Sehun scowled. “Later.” He dropped his attention back to the book. He would have stayed at home if only he had won that stupid bet. Kai could definitely run faster than he could, even as a human. Even though Sehun had known that fact, he had agreed to race the boy across the street. He had lost pathetically, of course.

 _“Now. Lost. Tummy,”_ said Kai, too excited to form full sentences.

Sehun slapped the book shut and groaned. “Fine!”

The pup plopped to the ground at once, its legs flailing in the air as it bared its belly to Sehun. This felt wrong. So wrong. If only he had won the bet, he would be eating a free meal at _Carlos’ Diner._

Now, he had to rub a wolf’s disgusting tummy. It was at least covered in fur.

Sehun closed his eyes and reluctantly stretched a hand out to the pup. The wolf started whining happily as Sehun’s hand touched its fur. And when he sank his fingers into it to scratch the belly, the wolf sang, _“Rub! Rub! Rub!”_

“Disgusting!” Sehun cried and pulled his hand back after giving the tummy a few rubs.

Kai looked satisfied when he clambered back to his paws.

* * *

As the morning came, Sehun hurried out of his house and started for the car. He was halted by the ruckus he heard from the Regnandi’s residence. When he peeked over the fence, he found Kai on the porch with Yixing’s crying baby in his arms.

Kai’s eyebrows were furrowed worriedly as he patted Nova’s back with the baby held against one of his shoulders. He looked unsure and anxious.

“Mom, get back here!” he cried desperately. “Please, stop crying. We gave you milk. Binky. Toys. Fresh air. We even cleaned your poop. I’ll give you money if you stop crying. Please,” he then told the baby, looking like he was close to breaking down.

Sehun smiled unconsciously.

“You couldn’t hold him for one minute?” Hana sighed when she showed up and retrieved Nova from Kai.

Kai frowned deeper. “Babies just don’t like me, Mom. Nova certainly doesn’t like me. It’s not my fault. I don’t think I would ever get along with a baby.”

“Everyone says that until they get babies of their own.” She gently clapped her hand to the baby’s back as she wandered back inside.

Kai took a big breath and leaned over the railing, shaking his head. A mighty Alpha couldn’t handle a little baby? Sehun found that heart-warming. But on the other hand, it made his guts twist in agony.

Kai eventually turned his head, and his eyes darted straight to Sehun.

Sehun almost ducked away, but he froze when he saw Kai give him half a smile. It was a very faint smile, but it was there. And it was pining after something. It reminded Sehun of the boy that used to smile at him like that, all dressed up and neat just for Sehun.


	25. Chapter 25

“You want to run like the wolves, too?” asked Jax when they reached the backdoor of the kitchen that overlooked the wide expanse of trees that surrounded the manor.

Sehun sank to a seat on the steps next to the boy’s wheelchair. “Don’t we all?” he muttered, looking up at the smiling boy.

“In a pack?”

Sighing, Sehun echoed, “In a pack.”

Jax gazed ahead at the woods. “I would want to know what it’s like to belong to a pack.”

Sehun knew what it was like. That was what destroyed him when he lost all of his pack in a single day. And his misery did not end there. Being abandoned by his parents, who were his small world, and Kai’s family at the same time left him with a sorrow that lasted for years. The loneliness never went away no matter what.

“What happened to _your_ pack?” Jax inquired with genuine curiosity.

Sehun lightly draped his arms around his legs and lowered his eyes. “My parents are dead,” he said bluntly.

“Oh,” the boy let out.

“I still have relatives. Grandparents. But they’re not really pack. They have their own packs. I don’t belong with them,” he continued. “I… also wanted to be a part of a pack that wasn’t mine to begin with, but I belonged there. I belonged with them.”

With _him_.

“Whose pack?” Jax asked.

Sehun was reminded of the days he’d run with Geun and the others. He could never keep up, but they’d all slow down for him. “A wolf pack,” he mumbled with a despaired breath.

“Is that… your boyfriend’s pack?”

Sehun kept mum.

Jax gasped. “Was he your… _Soulbinder?_ ” he whispered, as though it were a secret.

“You know about Soulbinders?”

“Yes. I’m not an idiot,” he spat, scowling now. “I know more than you do.”

Sehun chuckled at that. He then shook his head. “I don’t believe in that anymore.”

Jax’s eyebrows furrowed low. “What do you mean you don’t believe in that? It is real. It’s not bigfoot.”

“It’s real for some people,” Sehun said. “because they choose to believe in it. It’s not like you can’t live without your Soulbinder.”

Even as he spoke, he felt like everything that was coming out of his mouth was a lie.

Because there was the truth. Right before his eyes. As much as he did not want to see it, he could not live _happily_ without his Soulbinder. His soul would forever roam around emptily, unsatisfied and lonely without being bound to his Soulbinder.

“If he is your Soulbinder, then you should stay with him,” said Jax. “You should do everything you can to be together. Like my father did.”

“And it killed your mother and put you on a wheelchair,” Sehun snapped now, teeth gnashing furiously. “Because that’s what doing everything you can to be together apparently gets you. It hurts the people you love!”

Kai had been selfish once. He had chosen Sehun once. And fate played a sick joke on them, which had cost them the life of someone they both loved dearly and left everyone with a great grief.

Sehun wanted to be selfish. He wanted Kai to be selfish again for their own sake. But even he knew there’d be dire consequences they might not be able to swallow. Besides, how much grievance could one man carry? Kai was already held accountable for Geun’s death. For their pack’s suffering.

Jax turned his face away, eyes falling sad.

“I… I’m sorry,” Sehun said quickly and shifted to his knees. “I didn’t… mean that.”

“You wouldn’t have said it if you didn’t mean it,” the boy mewled, trying hard to hide the angry tears in his eyes.

“Jax—”

“I want to go to my room,” he murmured and wheeled himself back inside. Sehun took a few deep breaths and rubbed his temples. He was on the edge today after what he had found on his porch last night and what he had seen this morning.

What was Kai up to?

* * *

The manor was quieter than usual. Sehun was certain he and Jax weren’t the only ones at home, even though Kali and the others had been gone the entire day. Sehun wondered what business they had in the town nearby.

He glanced at the boy from where he sat on the chaise lounge. Jax was still louring at the TV. He hadn’t said a word to Sehun for hours. A servant eventually walked in with the boy’s dinner.

“Would you also like to have something to eat?” asked the servant. Sehun refused, saying he brought his own dinner. It had gone cold, but he did not mind it.

Jax was staring at him now as Sehun fished out a container from his bag. “What is that?” the boy asked, sounding annoyed.

Sehun cleared his throat. “It’s, um, rabbit stew.”

Jax’s eyes ballooned. “Rabbit?”

“Uh… Yeah.” Sehun looked down into the stew. It was not greatly palatable. But it was decent. And he was going to eat it all.

“Is it good?”

Sehun looked at the salmon on the boy’s plate and snickered. “Nope. Well, it’s okay, I guess. I’m not the best of cooks.”

Jax licked his lips. “You don’t have to eat that, then.”

“No,” Sehun sighed. “I want to.”

“Why?”

Sehun licked his lips. “Well, my… Remember my ex-boyfriend? He hunted it for me.”

Jax mouth fell agape. “What?!” And just like that, all of his anger mellowed into surprise. “He brought you rabbits?!”

“I… think so. I threw them out the last time. And made him promise to never do it again.”

“Why did he do it again, then?”

Sehun smiled to himself then. “Maybe it’s time that we forgot about the old promises we made to each other…” _and start afresh._

“That is… romantic. Are you going to take him back?”

“It’s complicated, kid.” He jerked his chin at Jax’s plate. “Eat up.”

Jax was grinning as he started eating. “You should take him back,” he then said with a full mouth. “He hunts for you! What more can you ask for?”

“I’m not the one that doesn’t want to take him back,” Sehun muttered. “Like I said. It’s complicated. And I don’t really know why… he’s doing this.”

“Maybe he just wants you to know that he loves you.”

Sehun kept his gaze low.

“At least you have a Soulbinder and a boyfriend that hunts for you,” Jax mumbled at length, frowning at the plate.

“What?”

Jax heaved a breath. “No one would really want me to be their Soulbinder, would they?”

Sehun rose from the chaise lounge and slipped into the bed. Throwing an arm over the boy’s shoulders, he said, “I don’t think we get to choose our Soulbinders, Jax. And anyone would be lucky to have you for their Soulbinder.”

“You’re saying that because my father pays you.”

“No,” Sehun said sternly. “Let me tell you a story. I knew a small boy, who didn’t think he even had a chance with his Soulbinder. He cleaned himself good every time he went to see his Soulbinder. He followed his Soulbinder everywhere, making promises to protect his Soulbinder always and to go wherever his Soulbinder went. He bought his Soulbinder flowers, kept him safe from disgusting bugs. He liked looking at his Soulbinder’s knees because he thought they were really pink. He would wait on the sidewalk every morning just so that he could go to school with his Soulbinder. He did all that without expecting much in return. He just did all that because it made him happy. It made him happy just to be there for his Soulbinder. He knew there would not be a future for them because he thought his Soulbinder did not like him the way he wanted to be liked. But in fact, his Soulbinder loved him so much. So much that he couldn’t bear to stay from the little boy.”

Jax’s eyes were glistening. “Is that… little boy… your… boyfriend?”

Sehun smiled a thin smile. “Sixteen years ago, if someone had told me I would fall in love with someone as insufferable and ugly as that little boy who was the smallest, daintiest little wolf I had ever seen, I would have laughed. And he would have, too. He did not think he even had a chance with me. And he was an Alpha. He was the best of both his parents. He had a great future. But he was insecure when it came to his Soulbinder. When it… came to me. He thought he was never good enough for me. When in fact, I was the one who would never be good enough for him. So, trust me. There is a little wolf out there that would want to steal your shoe, sniff you, go wherever you go.”

Jax giggled then. “You think?”

“Yes. Absolutely. And no matter how great they are, they would crumble in front of you. So, you don’t have to be insecure, Jax. Because they are just as insecure.”

The boy nodded his head slowly. “I would like to meet him,” he whispered after a while. “Your boyfriend.”

Sehun smiled. He did not know how Jax would react when he found out that Sehun’s “boyfriend” was actually the boy’s cousin.

* * *

“We have guest rooms,” Jax said as Sehun helped him climb into the bed after he helped the boy slip his pyjamas on. “You don’t have to sleep on that.”

“I’ll be fine,” Sehun assured him. “Unless you’re uncomfortable with me sleeping here.”

Jaz shook his head before he rested it on the pillow. “I never had anyone sleep in here with me apart from my dad. But I don’t care.”

“Okay. I’ll be right back. You get to sleep.” He turned the lights off and wended his way out of the room.

“Hey, Sehun?” the boy called, and Sehun stopped in his tracks to glance back at Jax.

“Yeah?”

“Good… night,” he muttered.

Sehun smiled back. “Good night, kid.”

As he meandered along the hallways, he surveyed the portraits on the walls with an absent mind. His concentration was elsewhere. He wondered what Kai was doing this very moment, and if he were thinking about Sehun right now.

Pulling his phone out, he checked it for messages. He had a couple from Taeyong that urged him to meet him at the diner tonight. Sehun replied, saying he could not because he was still at work.

When he reached the kitchen, he looked around for the servants. He found none. Picking up a glass, he walked over to the sink without bothering to turn on the kitchen lights.

As he filled the glass with some tap water, his eyes glowered out the kitchen windows. The branches on the trees were unmoving, as though the night was windless without any stir. Turning the tap off, Sehun took a swig of the cold water, eyes narrowing.

He lowered the glass as his vision centred on the shadowy figures that skulked between the trees. They were too short to be humans.

Wolves.

He heard the discordant noise of shattering glass and froze, blood pounding in his temples. He then shuddered at the consequent thuds that ran his blood cold. When he could move and talk again, he said, “Hello?”

His voice resounded through the silence that followed. Then all at once, a head-splitting growl and scream broke the tranquillity of the manor before he, almost immediately, smelled the stench of fresh blood that coursed through the air.

He lunged forward and charged out of the kitchen, dropping the glass of water to smash on the ground. Careering past the hallways as fast as his feet could carry him, he followed the trail of blood’s scent.

He only stopped when he reached the end of a hallway where he found the dead body of a servant in a pool of blood, a wolf’s bitemark on her bleeding neck.

For a second, Sehun retched as his head spun. He dropped his knees and brought a shaking hand close to the servant’s neck before he retrieved the hand, eyes pricking with tears. His throat was tight, and his ears were drumming. He smelled the foreign scents all around him.

“Jax,” he rasped and shot up to his feet before breaking into a sprint toward the boy’s room with his heart thundering in his mouth.

Wolves. Why were the wolves here? And why were they attacking?

When he burst into Jax’s room, he found the boy sitting up on his bed, eyes filled with horror. “Did you hear that?” he asked, panting.

Sehun slammed the door shut and locked it before he hurried over to the bed and slipped his arms under the boy to scoop him up into his arms.

“What are you doing? What is going on?” Jax asked frantically as Sehun carried him to the bathroom.

“Shh. I need you to stay in here. And be quiet,” Sehun told him, sitting the boy down on the floor of the bathroom. There was a thud on the door. And another one. And growls everywhere.

“Are those… wolves?” gasped Jax.

“Shit,” Sehun hissed as he jolted back up to look at the window and the bedroom door. The hinges were starting to give in.

“Who are they?” the boy cried.

“I don’t know,” Sehun blurted out in a panic as grabbed his phone that was ringing. He did not recognize the number, but he answered it.

“Sehun?” he heard a familiar voice on the other end, sounding as panicked as Sehun was. “Where are you?”

“Kai?” Sehun puffed, his body shivering with fear. “How did you get my number?”

“That’s not important right now. Where the hell are you?”

“At Kali’s manor. There are… There are wolves. Attacking.”

“Fuck,” he heard Kai spit. He sounded out of breath, like he was running.

Sehun glanced at the door again. The wood was beginning to split.

“Sehun?! Sehun!”

Hanging the call up, Sehun picked the boy back up into his arms. “They’re about to break the door down. We need to get out of here.” With his chest heaving with arduous breathing, he gripped the boy tightly against his chest and hurried to the windows. Yanking them open, he struggled to clamber out of them while holding onto Jax.

“Dad… Dad…” the boy wept, clinging to Sehun’s neck.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. You’re going to be fine,” Sehun panted as he started running around the manor to get to his car. He halted when he heard the footfalls of the galloping wolves around him. “Shit.” He glanced at the shed at the back of the manor. He sprinted to the shed and sat the boy in there before he crawled in and shut the door.

“Are we going to die?” Jax cried as Sehun pinned his back against the shed’s door to obstruct it.

“No. No,” he panted out, his own heart hammering against his chest, as though it were about to leap out of it.

Who were those wolves? Rexits?

But why would they…

He heard the ferocious bay before he felt a wolf ram its head against the shed’s door. He was almost thrown forward. Planting his heels firmly into the ground, he pushed back to keep the door closed, teeth gritted and hands digging into the floorboards.

“Grab the wrench!” he ordered Jax.

The boy looked up at the worktable and started sliding toward it. He reached his hand up and grabbed onto the wrench on the edge of the table before he hurled it across the floor.

Picking it up, Sehun clenched his eyes and struggled to stay put as the wolves began to smash into the outside of the shed on all sides, their paws clawing into the wooden boards.

The boy continued to cry for his dad.

And Sehun heard Kai’s wolf’s song.

_We’re coming._

_Stay safe._

_We’re coming._

_Love! Mate! Soul! Be safe. I’m coming._

_Love. Love. Love._

Sehun crashed against the ground when the door was split open and a couple of timber wolves burst into the shed. He quickly scurried up to his feet and put himself between the snarling wolves and the limp boy.

A fist tightened around his fist. He would not back away, even though he was completely certain that he stood no chance. There were four of them and one of him.

_Love. Love. Love._

Sehun could _feel_ the white wolf’s fear and terror. He could feel how scared Kai was for him.

“What do you want?” he spat at the timber wolves.

He did not hear their calling. But they were looking at Jax.

Before they could pounce, Sehun lurched forward and struck one of them with the wrench. He then threw himself onto the other and wrested it to the ground, tumbling out of the shed.

The teeth that latched around the shin of his leg brought him a pain like no other and he screamed into the night before he slammed the wolf across the face with the wrench.

He tried to stand back up, but his bleeding and wounded leg disallowed him anything but tears and pain. So, this was how he was going to die. He didn’t really care. He didn’t think he cared. But he needed Jax safe.

And there was a brown wolf strutting towards the crying boy.

Sehun almost rose to his knees before one of the wolves pounced on him and clawed him across the neck.

_Kai!_

He thought he had cried out loud. He hadn’t. He couldn’t find his voice.

Then all that he saw against the canvas of black that was freckled with stars was the great white wolf that vaulted off the ground and charged at the wolf that was pinning Sehun down.

As the wolves rolled over the ground, Sehun raised his head to look at the two black wolves that attacked the other wolves. He looked at the white wolf next. It had taken a standing, facing the other wolf. Teeth bared, eyes flaring red. Sehun had not seen a wolf so majestic and regal. It had the grace of a white wolf. But it carried the ferocity of a black. It was bigger than most of the wolves Sehun had seen in his life.

The other wolf retreated and howled, ordering the rest of them to withdraw. Sehun averted his gaze to Jax, who was still sobbing inside the shed, as the wolves began to retreat. The white wolf gave them a vicious bark, teeth snapping threateningly.

“Jax,” Sehun let out and crawled over to him, dragging his injured leg. “Hey, hey. It’s okay. You’re okay.” He pulled the boy close and wrapped his arms around him. “We’re okay now.”


	26. Chapter 26

_“Happy birthday,”_ Sehun said shyly as he handed Jeni the present he had gotten for her. It was a small stuffed unicorn he thought she might like since she loved hoarding all sorts of stuffed animals.

She accepted the nicely wrapped box with big, curious eyes. _“Thank you, Sehun,”_ she said in her squeaky voice. She looked surprised that Sehun had gotten her a present at all.

Sehun rubbed the back of his neck. _“My mom wrapped it.”_

_“Oh. I see. It’s… pretty.”_

Hana, who stood behind her daughter, raised her hands to Jeni’s shoulders and smiled at Sehun. _“That’s so nice of you, Sehun,”_ she said. Sehun blushed even harder. Jeni was as ugly as Kai was when he was a little younger. But she was always so pleasant to him. So, he had wanted to get her something pretty for her birthday.

The party was a small gathering on the Regnandis’ front yard. They had a grill puffing out palls of smoke into the air. Sehun spied the charred ears of corn, juicy slabs of meat, skewers of vegetables on it, and his belly growled. Some of the neighbours were there, too. Sehun’s dad was at work, but his mother had come along. And she was talking to Geun near the porch.

 _“Please, help yourself to anything you want, Sehun,”_ Hana prompted him, directing him toward the table that was filled with divers foods. Nodding his head, he started toward the table. He noticed Yixing, Jaehyun and Chanri were busy mingling with the guests. Kai was nowhere to be seen.

Sehun grabbed himself a paper plate before filling it with a couple of hotdogs and some mustard. He then walked back to his mother and Geun.

 _“Ah, Sehun,”_ Geun said with a wide grin and gave the back of Sehun’s neck a grip that was meant for big boys. Sehun felt proud at the grip. _“Your mother was just telling me that you have exams coming up.”_

Sehun looked up at his mother. She smirked at him.

 _“Look, Sehun. We all love having you around. But Kai also has his exams coming up. And your mother is worried that you’re playing more than you’re studying,”_ Geun said, still with that smile that made Sehun’s knees weak. _“I’m sorry, buddy. But you’re going to have to do as your mother says and focus on your exams for the next couple of weeks, okay?”_

Sehun frowned, but he was not going to protest. So, he bowed his head meekly. _“Yes, sir,”_ he mumbled softly.

Someone tapped on his shoulder then. Sehun turned around, a plate in his hand. Kai grinned at him with his entire set of teeth. “ _Hey, Sehun,”_ he said, hopping on his toes. He always was so excited to see Sehun.

 _“Hey,”_ Sehun muttered dully, dropping his gaze to the hotdogs on the paper plate.

 _“Come with me,”_ Kai then said. He was clad in an ironed shirt, a pair of black pants, and shiny shoes. Even his hair was glistening with gel. All that Sehun was wearing a yellow T-shirt and a pair of brown shorts and sneakers.

Sehun looked to his mother and Geun for permission.

 _“Go on,”_ his mother said, smiling. _“But don’t wander off too far.”_

Kai turned on his heel and started for the backyard. Sehun followed, taking a big bite of a hotdog. _“I found something last night,”_ said Kai.

 _“What?”_ Sehun asked with a full mouth.

_“You’ll see.”_

When they reached the backyard, Kai came to a stop to turn around. His eyes fell to Sehun’s exposed legs and stared at the knees for a long moment.

Sehun scowled. _“What are you looking at?”_ he asked annoyedly.

Kai immediately raised his head and coughed. _“Nothing,”_ he squealed out. _“Um, here.”_ He hurried into the kitchen through the backdoor before he returned with a jar.

Sehun licked the mustard on his fingers as he walked over to Kai with a raised eyebrow. _“What is this?”_

The jar held a fluttering moth captive. Sehun gasped and leaned forward to take a better look.

_“Where did you get that from?!”_

Kai giggled. _“It was in my room last night. I caught it. All by myself.”_

Sehun then scowled. _“And you kept it? In this?”_

Kai’s humour died from his expression and he blinked. _“Yes?”_

 _“Are you an idiot?”_ Sehun scolded him.

 _“What?”_ Kai blinked again.

 _“You cannot keep a moth. It will die.”_ Sehun wrenched the jar from Kai’s hands and unlidded it at once, setting the moth free. As it flitted into the air, Sehun sighed heavily.

 _“I was… not going to keep it,”_ Kai said with a frown _. “It had… weird wings. I just… wanted to show them to you before letting it go. But… I can’t anymore.”_

 _“Oh.”_ Sehun bit his lip.

Kai walked away disappointedly, hands plunged into the pockets of his pants. Plopping down on the ground, he leaned against a tree and pouted angrily.

Sehun joined him at his side and held out the plate. _“Hotdog?”_

Kai gave no response as he kept on pouting.

 _“How am I supposed to know that moth had funny wings?!”_ Sehun then yapped. _“You didn’t tell me!”_

 _“You didn’t give me a chance to tell you,”_ Kai argued, huffing loudly.

 _“Okay. It’s gone now. What can I do to make it up to you?”_ Not that Sehun felt obligated to please the boy. But he was in the wrong. And he did not like owing Kai anything.

Kai was looking at Sehun’s knees again. Sehun fought the urge to hide them from the boy. _“Rub my belly again?”_

Sehun groaned. _“Anything but that!”_

_“Okay. I’ll think of something.”_

* * *

“Sehun,” Taeyong gasped when he finally showed up in the ER along with Baz. Sehun raised his head from where he sat and frowned.

When he tried to stand up, Yixing at his side held onto an arm. “I’m fine,” he told the older man and pulled his arm free. The painkillers were starting to kick in, but they were not doing enough for him to stand on his injured leg.

“ _Ay_. _Dios mío._ Are you all right?” Baz inquired, his bloodshot eyes looking at Sehun worriedly from behind the spectacles.

“Uh, yes… Sort of,” Sehun muttered, pointing to his bandaged shin, and looked to Taeyong. “Why did you bring him here?” he asked his friend in hushed tones.

“He called me,” said Taeyong.

“How did it happen?” Baz asked, gaze bouncing from Sehun to Yixing and then back to Sehun.

“Wolves broke into manor and attacked. We managed to escape.” Sehun wasn’t sure if Baz bought it, but it was the story he was sticking with. That was the story he had told the cops a while ago when they had interrogated him and Jax.

Taeyong’s eyes narrowed.

“God,” sighed Baz. “You ought to be more careful.” He looked at Yixing again and his attention finally fell on the bandage around Yixing’s wrist. He was also wounded by one of the wolves during the brawl. “You’re… hurt, too?”

“Uh, yeah.” Yixing did not give any further explanation. Baz stared at them in disbelief. Part of Sehun felt bad for keeping the boy in the dark, but another part of him was sure that it was for the best. Baz did not need to get sucked into this madness.

Baz stepped past Sehun and took hold of Yixing’s hand to inspect the bandaged wrist. Sehun noticed the way Yixing shuddered and flinched before he retrieved his hand from the olive-skinned boy, face flushed.

“I’ll go get the doctor, so you can go home,” Yixing said and disappeared.

Sehun cleared his throat. “You two know each other now?” he asked Baz.

Baz licked his lips. “No, no,” he said quickly. “Nothing like that. He just…” He trailed off, scratching the back of his head.

“He’s been showing up at the diner a lot lately,” said Taeyong with a dubious expression. “For Sebastián’s milkshakes.”

“Taeyong, please cut it out,” Baz stuttered. “It’s not even remotely funny. He’s… not like that. He’s a gentleman.”

Taeyong sighed. “Whatever.” He turned to Sehun. In a low voice, he asked, “How bad was it?”

Sehun shook his head. “Pretty bad… I didn’t know… what was even happening.”

Squeezing Sehun’s arm, Taeyong took a look at the dressing on the wound on Sehun’s neck. “Shit. Dude, you look horrible.”

“I _feel_ horrible,” said Sehun. His eyelids were about to shut on their own at given minute now. He plumped back down in his seat.

“He called the diner and asked me for your phone number,” Baz then said.

Sehun cocked an eyebrow at him. “Who?”

“Yixing.” When he said the name, he looked flustered. “Said it was an emergency. I don’t… really understand what’s going on now, though.”

“Baz, it’s fine. You should go home,” said Sehun. “Thanks for coming.”

Baz frowned with hurt and disappointment. “Are you sure? I can stay.”

“I promise, everything’s all right. You should go. I’m just going to go home now and sleep for a couple of days.”

“Oh… Okay.”

Nodding his head and heaving a deep breath then, Baz told Sehun take care and that he would come see Sehun at his home tomorrow before he took off.

“What happened?” Taeyong asked once Baz was gone.

“I don’t know. I was at Kali’s manor. With Jax and… these wolves intruded and attacked.” His stomach churned when he thought of the dead servant and all the blood. The ferocity of the wolves had his blood running cold again. “I don’t know why they wanted to hurt Jax.”

“Where is he now?”

“Kai and Chanri took him back to their own home.”

“Holy fuck. They were there when it happened?”

“No. They knew. Kai knew. He called when those wolves were attacking. And then they showed up. If they hadn’t showed up in time… I…” He rubbed his forehead.

“Jesus. This is… fucked up,” Taeyong let out. “How did they know, though?”

“I don’t know,” said Sehun, scowling. “But I will find out.”

“Do you think… Kali knows?”

Before Sehun could answer, Yixing reappeared with Don, who was clad in a doctor’s coat. Sehun’s eyes widened.

“I would say good to see you here, Sehun, but this isn’t a pleasant visit for you, I reckon,” said Don with a simper as he flipped the papers on the clipboard.

“You’re a… doctor?” Taeyong asked.

“The only doctor, actually,” said Don. “Small town. Not many patients around.” He turned to Sehun. “Your wounds are not deep. But I wouldn’t advise putting too much pressure on that leg. So, you should probably use the crutches we give you.”

“I’ll be fine,” Sehun said.

“Sehun, don’t be a hero.”

“I said I’ll be fine.” He stood up.

Don exhaled heavily. “Give it a rest for at least a week. No driving, it’s not safe. Take the painkillers we give you and it should heal on its own. Just change the bandages once every two days. Oh, and no cartwheels.” He winked.

Sehun gave a curt nod. “Can I go now?”

“I’ll give you a ride home,” said Yixing.

“No. Taeyong can—”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Sehun.” Yixing grabbed Sehun’s arm.

“Here,” Don said, tossing Yixing his keys. “Take my car.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow, Taeyong,” Sehun told him before he limped after Yixing. Every step hurt.

* * *

The ride back home was quiet. Sehun wanted to ask endless questions. But his body disallowed him. All that he could do was weakly rest his head against the car’s window and stare aimlessly while thinking about Jax.

When they pulled into the dirt driveway, Yixing patted on his shoulder. “Are you all right?”

Sehun did not respond as he unfastened the seatbelt and stepped out of the car. He swooned for a second and held onto the car’s door to steady himself. His leg smarted and he realized he probably should have taken the crutches.

The porchlight turned on, and he twisted his head around to look at the door that was pried open before Chanri stepped out.

“Yixing,” she called. “You guys okay?”

“Yeah,” muttered Yixing. “The dead body at the manor?”

“The police took care of it. They might ring Sehun in for more information soon, though. But we managed to pull a few strings and they might close the case promptly.”

Yixing then glanced in Sehun’s way. “Sehun, maybe you should stay the night if you’re not in the—”

“Where’s the boy?” Sehun cut him off as he started wobbling toward the porch.

“He’s asleep,” said Chanri. “He’s safe, Sehun.”

Sehun stopped in his shaky tracks when he saw Kai burst out of the house, wearing a dreadful expression. He halted, too, on the porch, although the look in his eyes suggested that he wanted to lunge at Sehun and pull him into an embrace.

“He was… my responsibility,” Sehun drawled. “I was supposed to keep him safe.”

“And you did,” said Yixing.

Sehun leaned back against the hood of the car. He was grateful for the cold night air that blew against the nape of his neck. “If you hadn’t gotten there in time, we would have been… dead.” He scrubbed his face with his bare palms. “Why were those Rexits attacking… Jax? They wanted him. They were… waiting for Kali to be out of town.”

Chanri, Yixing, and Kai were quiet. Sehun lifted his gaze and met Kai’s furious eyes. His hands were fisted at his sides.

Hana appeared eventually. She looked tired and unsettled. “Get inside,” she told everyone. “You too, Sehun.”

Determined to see Jax, Sehun started toward the front door. When he staggered over the porch steps, a strong hand came to grab his arm to steady him.

“Sehun,” he heard Kai say softly, worriedly. Sehun yanked his arm free from Kai’s grip and walked into the house.

Jaehyun was awake and was seated on the couch in the living room. Noah and Jeni were up, too. And they all sported a similar unnerved expression.

“You’re out of your mind, Kai,” Jaehyun growled as he jolted up to his feet when Sehun walked in. “Out of your fucking mind!”

“Jaehyun!” Hana chided. “Calm down.”

“He’s going to ruin this pack,” Jaehyun spat.

Noah’s face was red when he spoke up. “You have a Rexit in the house. And you just… You just…” He hung his head. “My father will… find out about this, Kai.”

“You mean, you’ll snitch to him,” Jaehyun sniped at Noah now.

Noah frowned. “No. I’m not going to—”

“And you fucking morons helped him!” Jaehyun then snapped at Yixing and Chanri.

“Sehun and Jax would have died otherwise,” yapped Chanri.

“Caring about these people is what got our father killed!” roared Jaehyun at his sister. “Wait. No.” He turned to Kai. His eyes glared like his wolf’s as his fangs faintly showed. Prodding a finger into Kai’s chest, he spat, “ _You_ got our father killed. For this guy. And you’re going to get us all killed now.”

Sehun wasn’t sure if it were the painkillers but his head was a muddle and he could not understand anything that was happening at the moment.

Kai said nothing. He stood there and took it all. Because he believed he deserved it all.

“That’s enough, Jaehyun,” Hana said, yanking Jaehyun away from Kai. “What’s done is done. We have to think about what we’re going to do now.”

“We interfered, Mom. These bloody fools interfered! Do you think the Regnandis are going to turn a blind eye to it?!” He turned to Kai once more. “Why the fuck do you care if they died or lived?! That boy is a Rexit.”

“He is our cousin,” argued Chanri. “He is family.”

Jaehyun glared at her now. “No. He’s a Rexit. And you just butted in on something that’s not our business.”

“They acted upon my orders,” Kai intervened then. “It’s solely my responsibility.”

“You’re goddamn right you are,” Jaehyun spat. “Every single one of the crap that’s been happening to our pack is _your_ responsibility.”

Kai clenched his hands. He looked like he was about to bring his wolf out and rip Jaehyun’s head off. But instead, he reeled his anger in and kept his head low.

“And yet, you get to take Dad’s place,” scoffed Jaehyun. “You never should have returned.”

That was when Hana’s hand struck a side of Jaehyun’s face. “I said enough is enough, Jaehyun!” she yelled, panting hard.

Before Jaehyun could retaliate, they heard cars pull up outside. Sehun took three deep breaths and hoped that this nightmare would soon end.

And then Kali barged into the house like a mad bull that was about to wreak havoc on everything he sighted. Dark veins protruded from his arms and neck as his eyes flickered from blue to gold. The snarl on his mouth was a vicious warning to anything in his warpath.

“Where’s my son?!” he thundered, barely stopping. Behind him, Jack and Vergel followed, looking almost just as a mad as the Alpha.

“Kali,” Hana called, stepping forward with her usual placating mien.

“Where is he?!” roared Kali.

Hana raised her hands to the man’s chest to stop him from going any further. “He is fine, Kali. Your son is safe and he is upstairs, sleeping.”

Kali breathed laboriously, eyes still refusing to turn back to blue. Just when Sehun thought he might gather his composure, Kali’s hand flung up to Hana’s neck and he slammed her back against the stair’s railing.

“Your fucking Regnandis did this,” he growled. “And I’m going to kill every last one of them.”

The Regnandis?

Kai grabbed Kali’s wrist then and forced the man’s hand away from his mother’s neck before he took hold of a vase. Jeni screamed a little when Kai slammed the vase across Kali’s head.

“That’s for touching my mother,” Kai spat while Hana rubbed her throat where she was gripped.

“Kai,” she objected and drew him away from Kali. “Stop. All of you. Just stop,” she ordered, eyes inflamed with tears.

Snarling, Kali wiped a drop of blood that trickled down his temple. He stopped Jack when the wolf tried to step forward.

“We had no part to play in this, Kali,” said Hana. “We would never… hurt Jax. You know that.”

“You stood back and watched while your wolves wanted to kill him and my mate,” Kali bayed.

“We could have done nothing.” She put herself between her son and Kali. “I’m sorry. But… there was nothing that we could do. And you know that. Your son would have died if it hadn’t been for my children tonight. The least you could do is show us some gratitude instead of barging in here like a beast.”

Kali calmed down then, his eyes mellowing to a cool shade of blue.

“Kai,” Hana then called. “Get out of here. Go for a run or something. Just… leave for a while.”

Kai was reluctant to obey as he continued to glower at Kali. But he, at length, stormed out of the house and disappeared into the woods.

“I’m sorry about that,” Hana said, looking to gash on Kali’s temple. “Come with me. I’ll have it cleaned up for you. And we should… talk.” She ushered Kali down the hall.

Jack was staring at Noah, who was staring back at the big man.

Sehun decided that he could no longer stand on his legs or bear any of this. So, he slipped out of the house, limping and with tears rolling down his cheeks unconsciously. He didn’t even know why he was crying, but he attributed some of the pain to the wound on his leg.

When he reached his home, he struggled to climb up to the treehouse. He was close to passing out. But he wanted to be in his nest tonight while he cried himself to sleep.

The Regnandis. Why were the Regnandis attacking an innocent boy?

He almost lost his footing as he clambered up the rope ladder with slow, painful steps. He then spilled into the treehouse and crashed the thin mattress before almost immediately blacking out.

* * *

He woke somewhere along the night when it was too cold for the blankets to handle. The cold was not the only thing that roused him. He felt a familiar scent prick his nose. He knew instantly that he was not alone.

When his eyes cracked open to squint at the darkness, they darted to the shadowy figure that was sitting on the edge of the mattress, a hand lightly draped over Sehun’s.

Sehun sat up, wincing at the sudden pain in his neck where the wolf had clawed him.

Kai did not remove his hand from Sehun’s as he continued to stare into the dark, head hung. Sehun wanted to ask what he was doing here? But after the shitty night they had both had, he already knew the answer.

Sehun’s nest had always been the one place they could both escape to. It was the safe haven built for only them.

Sehun turned his hand under Kai’s and interlaced their fingers. Kai turned his head then to glance at their clasped hands. Even in the dark, Sehun could make out the grieving look on Kai’s face.

“Sehun…” Kai whispered, voice full of sorrow. Sehun slid his free hand around the back of Kai’s head and cupped it gently. Kai slowly lifted his head. “I’m not… a bad person,” he breathed out. “I’m not… I’m… not.”

Sehun pressed their foreheads together. “I know.” He brushed his lips to Kai’s lidded eyes one by one while his fingers softly stroked the wolf’s hair. “I know.”


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lack of updates. I'm currently in the middle of my finals >.<

He spied the faint first lights of the day that spilled into the treehouse. The dark of the night had not completely ebbed either. The smell of morning mingled with the waning remnants of the night air. He was reminded of all the dawns he had encountered in the treehouse, wishing that morning never came. He wished for the same thing today, too. He never wanted to leave his nest. His small, insignificant, novel nest that had once again caught the scent that was missing for years.

Sehun took it all in as his senses slowly roused with a lethargy that stretched to every bone in his body. The wound on his shin and neck jounced indecisively between numbness and pain. But it did not unnerve him. In fact, nothing possibly could. He was safe. He felt safe. His treehouse, his home, his nest, his Alpha. It was as though he was tucked safely away in a solacing bubble that, in hindsight, would not remain formidable for long. This could all burst and fade away in the blink of an eye.

But for now, he was here and his Soulbinder was here. Breathing the same space of air. It almost seemed too good to be real. Even if it were all just a dream, Sehun was willing to take it. Just for a while. He wanted to be whisked away from the madness of the world he was in and be swaddled in nothing but love, security and warmth.

There was once a time when he believed there could not be a bleaker place than Oakenbury. The town was notorious for the uneventful years it entertained. But now, Sehun would do anything to get those uneventful years back where all that he knew was the affection of his parents, the veneration for the Regnandis that lived on the end of the street, the little wolf boy that waited on the dirt road every morning with a wide grin on his face.

He clenched his eyes again to block out the light from the brightening outside. The sound of Kai’s soft snores lulled him back to a pleasant drowsiness, which he welcomed. The heat of Kai’s body radiated all over Sehun’s back. And the arm that was draped over his waist had his heart racing like a teenage boy’s. He wanted to turn around and look at the wolf, to reassure himself that Kai was here. Not that he needed to. His senses were already overwhelmed by Kai’s scent and presence.

He thought about the first time he and Kai had a sleepover. He recalled how nervous Kai had been to share the same air mattress with him.

* * *

 _“This… was not the kind of sleepover I had in mind,”_ remarked Sara when they walked into the house, each hugging a pillow of their own. Sehun was as flabbergasted as Sara and Taeyong were as he bowled over the setup in the living room. There were tiny tents, air mattress, bowls of popcorns and pretzels, chocolate drinks in mason jars, candies, sandwiches, and against a wall, there was a huge white screen in front of a projector. Kai did mention that they would watch a movie before going to bed, but this was… something else.

And in the midst of it all was Kai, all clad in his blue pyjamas with the baby lambs he was once too embarrassed to wear in front of Sehun. The boy was beaming with excitement.

 _“Welcome,”_ he said, beckoning to Sehun, Sara and Taeyong.

 _“Um… Wow,”_ let out Taeyong as he picked up the bowl of gummy bears.

 _“Hey, Sehun,”_ said Chanri, climbing down the stairs.

 _“Chanri!”_ Kai hissed through his grit teeth and scowled up at his sister. _“I told you to stay away.”_

 _“I know,”_ she said. When she tried to ruffle his hair, Kai stepped away and looked at Sehun with a flushed face. _“I just have to get Jaehyun’s mouthguard.”_ She then turned to Sehun and his friends. _“You have no idea how much fuss he’s been making for his first slumber party.”_

Sehun grimaced. He did not like the sound of that. It sounded like something girls would be excited over.

 _“Chanri, go back upstairs,”_ Kai growled.

 _“Okay. Okay,”_ she sighed and hurried away.

As soon as she was gone, Kai spread out the blankets on the air mattresses for them to sit on. _“So,”_ he then said, turning to Sehun and the others. _“We’re going to have a lot of fun tonight! We’re even going to watch Jurassic Park. Theatre style.”_

 _“Wow,”_ Taeyong said again. _“This is all very—”_

 _“Much,”_ Sehun finished. Kai looked at him then, blinking confusedly. Sehun hugged the pillow tightly and pulled the meanest face he could. _“Too much.”_

 _“What do you… mean?”_ asked Kai, frowning.

Sehun plumped on one of the air mattresses and leaned back on his hands. _“This seems like something a group of giggling girls will do. I thought we’d just sleep in your room and play video games.”_

Kai’s face died. _“You… don’t like… this?”_

Sehun shrugged.

 _“No, Kai,”_ said Sara instead. _“I don’t think that’s what Sehun is saying.”_ She scowled in Sehun’s way for a brief moment before she turned to Kai with a smile. _“I’m sure we’ll all have fun. I’m a girl and I don’t think a good slumber party is only for a group of giggling girls.”_

Sehun’s heart dropped. He was wrong. He was wrong? Well, if Sara was right, then he was wrong. Sara was always right. And right now, she was disagreeing with him.

She was smiling at Kai and scowling at Sehun. That made Sehun angry.

 _“Oh,”_ Kai said but did not seem convinced. He managed a small smile anyway. _“I got us some board games to play, too.”_

 _“You mean ‘bored’ games?”_ Sehun scoffed.

 _“That sounds fun, Kai,”_ said Sara. _“Let’s play them!”_

 _“I’ll go get them,”_ the wolf boy said and ambled away with heavy footsteps.

Sara then looked at Sehun. _“Why are you being mean?”_

 _“I’m not,”_ Sehun argued.

_“Yes, you are. Because you are jealous. Because when we have sleepovers, you can’t make it as fun as he did.”_

There was some truth in it. And Sehun was mad that she had figured it out. _“No.”_ He crossed his arms over his chest and glanced up at Kai who returned to the living room with some board games.

After an evening of board games, movies and snacks, Hana came downstairs to tell them that it was bedtime. Sara and Taeyong clambered into an air mattress at once. Kai waited until Sehun was settled in another to kneel down on the floor next to the air mattress.

 _“What?”_ Sehun asked.

 _“Can I…”_ the boy mumbled.

Sehun huffed heavily and moved to make some room for the wolf, but he did not make too much room. _“I don’t like it when people snore,”_ he told Kai sternly. _“Or put their legs or arms over me.”_

Kai swallowed. _“I don’t snore. Or do the other thing.”_

 _“Good.”_ Sehun turned his back to the boy and closed his eyes.

After a while, he heard a soft whisper. _“Good night, Sehun.”_

* * *

He felt Kai twitch behind him, and his breathing froze. Looking down to Kai’s hand that tautening around a corner of his waist, Sehun decided to turn around. Kai retrieved his hand as Sehun shifted on the mattress. His eyes were still tightly shut when Sehun faced him, their faces only inches apart. So close that Sehun could feel the heat of Kai’s breath on his cheeks.

He was awake, Sehun knew that much because his breathing was no longer steady. It quivered like the hand that was curling back around Sehun’s waist. Sehun wanted Kai to open his eyes and look at him. But he closed his instead when Kai’s fingers slowly slid into his shirt, drawing the hem of it up. The instant Kai’s hand touched the bare skin of Sehun’s waist, all those fireworks of colours swallowed Sehun whole. His own breaths started coming out in a laboured haste. Then Kai moved the hand along the slight curve of the side of Sehun’s torso, very gently as though he was sculpting with his hand.

When Sehun’s eyes fluttered open just a little, they met Kai’s half-lidded ones. His lips were parted, panting, as were Sehun’s. Sehun raised a hand to Kai’s chest. He felt a turbulent heartbeat beneath his palm.

“Kai,” he exhaled. God, he wanted to chant the name over and over again like a prayer so that it would forever be etched to his lips. Better than that, he wanted Kai himself to be etched on them.

No matter how much they kept pulling away from each other, they were always drawn back together. Not even years of rancid misery and grievances could keep them away from this moment where they wanted nothing but to be each other’s comfort.

_He says nothing comes before the pack for him now. But take my word for it. He will not hesitate for a single second to leave it again for you if it came down to it. He’s made up his mind since he was eleven, Sehun. He doesn’t show it. But he’s more strong-willed than any of us. I don’t think the rest of us could have held on to our humanity for three years in our wolves. But he did. Because that human part of him was clinging onto its love for you._

Chanri’s words echoed in his head in that moment. Right now, at his most vulnerable state, Kai would choose Sehun. And as much as Sehun wanted to be selfish, he knew not to take advantage of Kai’s internal conflicts, which had amplified tenfold since last night.

Sehun started to pull away.

And that was when Kai leaned in and captured his lips between his own.

“Don’t tell me to go,” he whispered against Sehun’s mouth, almost as quietly as the beating wings of the birds that chirped around the treehouse, ringing in the morning.

Sehun settled back in, a hand tightening around the back of Kai’s head as Kai propped himself up on an elbow and hovered above Sehun before he dipped his head and kissed Sehun again.

They only broke apart when they were completely out of breath. Kai rested his forehead on top of Sehun’s and panted hard with a hand cupping and stroking Sehun’s cheek. “Don’t tell me to leave,” he begged breathlessly before placing a couple of kisses on Sehun’s cheek.

It felt as though a fire had been ignited in the pit of Sehun’s belly. It made the back of his eyes sting and his heart pound like he was hanging off a cliff that overlooked his death.

Grabbing Kai’s shirt, he pulled the man down for another kiss. His fumbling fingers eventually managed to unbutton the first two buttons of Kai’s shirt while Kai’s tongue swirled around his. Sehun then moved his tentative fingers down Kai’s bare chest, desperately wanting to feel more of the wolf’s skin and bathe himself in the warmth of it.

Kai must have had the same hunger for Sehun’s because his hand was starting to grip the side of Sehun’s waist, hard enough to bruise the skin there. Sehun wanted it to bruise. He would wear it with great pride.

A deep, wolfish growl rumbled from Kai’s chest as Sehun drew his hand down the hard abdominal muscles.

Kai broke the kiss to suck in a large draft of air when Sehun palmed him over the crotch. It was a completely instinctive move that left Sehun aghast because he could not believe that he had gone that far. Now he wanted to go even further.

What would having his Alpha, his Soulbinder bite and mark him be like? What would mating with the man he loved entail? How would Kai knotting him feel? He wanted to crumble under the Alpha. And he knew Kai would crumble just as much.

“Shit,” Kai then hissed all of a sudden, but before he could get off Sehun, Taeyong climbed into the treehouse.

“Sehun, are you in he—”

“Taeyong,” Sehun yelped in a hoarse voice as he jolted upright and winced when his neck smarted.

Taeyong stopped at the entryway, jaw falling slack as his eyes wandered to Kai who was hurriedly buttoning up his shirt. “Uh…” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Just wanted… um check on you before I headed to the school but… uh… I guess everything is fine and dandy here… I’ll just, um… leave.” He turned around and stopped again. “Oh, and Kali is looking for you. He called me because you weren’t picking up.” He grimaced once before he hurried down the rope ladder.

Sehun buried his burning face in his hands and regretted not having put a lockable door in the treehouse. He was not sure his face was hot from the mortifying thing that had just happened or from… He stopped himself from even thinking about what might have happened had Taeyong not interrupted.

When he finally found the courage to take his hands away from the face, he raised his head and turned to look at Kai, who was staring emptily at the entrance of the treehouse.

“He’s not going to… tell anyone,” muttered Sehun, wondering if that was what had Kai’s face crumpled up so sourly.

Kai lowered his gaze, then his head. “It could have been someone who would,” he let out.

Sehun’s eyebrows furrowed. “You would have sensed it.”

“I didn’t now, did I? I was too… distracted,” Kai sighed. “I should… get going.”

Sehun kept mum. But Kai did not move either. Then Sehun took hold of Kai’s hand. “Thank you,” he said. Kai lifted his eyes to meet Sehun’s. “For… saving me and Jax last night.”

Kai frowned.

“I… heard your songs,” said Sehun. “I felt how… scared you were for me.”

Kai did not look away. Then something like guilt swept across his expression. “You shouldn’t thank me… I was… part of the reason why you got attacked in the first place.”

Sehun was unblinking for a moment before he pulled his hand back. “What?”

Kai started rubbing his temples. “I didn’t want them to attack you or Jax. But…”

Sehun glowered now. “Last night, when Jaehyun said that you interfered… what exactly did you interfere?”

Kai closed his eyes momentarily and licked his lips. “Those wolves that attacked you were… Regnandis.”

“So, Kali was right.”

Kai nodded his head slowly. “They were there for Jax. For a leverage against Kali to get him to surrender.”

Sehun could only stare at Kai now.

“You weren’t… supposed to be there,” Kai then added miserably.

“You… knew… about what was going to happen to Jax?” Sehun’s ears were ringing as his blood began to simmer with rage. “You _knew_?!”

“I didn’t know… everything. And I can’t interfere with the other Regnandis, Sehun. We’re the same echelon but there are bigger, stronger Alphas and rules we need to obey.”

Sehun shot up to his feet. “So, you knew they were going to take Jax, who’s by the way, your goddamn eleven-year-old, disabled, motherless cousin, whose whole world revolves around just his father. Just so that they can get to Kali? And you weren’t going to do anything? Why don't you Regnandis fucking pick someone your size and face Kali head-on instead of his handicapped son?”

Kai looked racked with guilt but Sehun was not going to let him off the hook for this one.

“He’s a child, Kai!”

“Sehun—”

“You would rather put Kali through that sort of pain than relinquish your fucking territory. God. Why did I even expect anything more from you… You wouldn’t understand until _you’ve_ lost a child of your own.”

“Don’t say that,” Kai exhaled, eyes shut. “I didn’t want it to happen, Sehun. But my hands were tied.”

Then it hit Sehun. “Your entire family knew about this… You all knew… Jax was in danger… And yet, you…” He stopped to catch his breath, not realizing that he was holding it. “Oh, my God…”

“Sehun,” Kai said, standing up.

“Get out,” Sehun then spat. “Your whole echelon might be monsters, but you are a coward and your family, whom I loved and respected so much, are just a pack of selfish, spineless assholes.”

Kai had nothing to say to that. He only gaped at Sehun in shock.

“This is so much bigger than any of you let on,” said Sehun. “You didn’t want me to side with Kali not because you didn’t want us to be on opposite teams. You were just worried that when the Aequuses start siding with the Rexits, you’d be outnumbered on your own territory. Well, guess what. I am going to do everything in my power to help take your bloody echelon down. Now, get out of my sight, Kai.”

Kai did not move immediately. But when he finally did, his eyes were bloodshot and complexion was ashen.


	28. Chapter 28

“Shit,” Sehun grumbled out as he removed the dressing around the wound on his shin, face crumpled in discomfort. Then stepping into the shower, he washed away all the mucks and dirt that were sticking to him, along with the smell of Kai that clung to his skin. He wished he could lave off the taste of Kai’s lips from his and the embittering thoughts of the Alpha just as easily.

Bowing his head to the water that jetted from the showerhead, he raised a hand to the wall before him. A familiar woe filled his chest then. What sort of a cruel joke was it? Every time it finally seemed like things were going to be all right between him and Kai, he was sprung for another spiral of madness. As exhausted as he was, he was ready to give up. Give up on Kai.

He did not know that he hadn’t already given up on Kai all these years. He had told Kai to leave that night many years ago and to never come back. He spent every day that followed trying to put Kai behind him. But he never could. There would always be a small part of him, a little light in his heart, that would continue to hope. To live the dreams he had built as a child. To belong in a pack. To have his soul bound to a free man.

His eyes burned. Tears that betrayed them trickled down his face along with the water.

He loved Kai. And he realized there was no way he could ever stop loving him. Not until he erased every single memory of Kai from his brain. Every single kiss they had shared. Every laughter. Every secret meeting. Every gaze. Every moment they had spent together since the day Sehun had met the little wolf boy at the end of the street.

But he was not a fool to not to see what the man he loved was doing was wrong. Everything his father had worried would happen happened. They never should have trusted the Regnandis. At the end of the day, they were still from different echelons, and they were no match for the Regnandis.

It hurt Sehun’s pride more than anything. It was an insult, an unforgivable disparagement laid upon his entire ancestry. The Aequuses meant nothing. The Rexits meant nothing. The Regnandis were all that mattered to the Regnandis. Everything they did was to protect their own legacy. To keep their bloodline clean. To ensure they would always be the strongest of wolves.

Sehun wanted to see them be taken down a peg. Even if that meant taking _Kai_ and his family down a peg.

How could they… They knew what was going to happen to Jax. And yet, they had chosen to stand by and let it happen. How could they…

Sehun slammed a fist against the bathroom wall and huffed, growling through his clenched teeth. He could not believe that the innocence he had seen in Kai growing up with him was all gone. He had revered Geun’s family. But they stood for the welfare of the Regnandis first. Even if that meant pawning a child, who was their own family. But Sehun supposed Jax was of little meaning to them because of his tainted blood.

Assholes.

Stepping out of the shower, he cleaned the wound on his neck before slipping into some clothes. Just as he wandered into the kitchen, he heard the doorbell ring. Wondering if it were Taeyong, he got the door, and was surprised to find Mrs. Bianchi at his doorstep.

“Thought I smelled someone familiar,” he said and let the old woman in.

“I heard about what happened,” she said with a worried look on her face. Settling her purse down on the credenza, she brought her hands to Sehun’s neck to inspect the scarring injury. “ _Oh Dio,_ she sighed. “That looks bad.”

“It’s fine, Mrs. Bianchi. What are you doing here? And how… did you find out?”

“News travels fast in a small town,” she muttered and sank into a seat on the couch.

Sehun rubbed the back of his neck. “Do you want some… tea or coffee?”

“You must be shaken, son. And I feel… terrible.”

Sehun frowned and perched on the armrest of the couch. “Why? It wasn’t your fault.”

“No, it wasn’t entirely. But I told you to go work for Kali and that is the whole reason everything happened.” She looked sad. “When I heard about it this morning, my heart almost fell out of my chest, kid. I was so worried.”

Sehun smiled at that. He knew he was not alone in this world. There was Mrs. Bianchi. There were Taeyong, Baz, Sara. And speaking of whom, he expected to see her pretty soon, too. She would not waste a second when she found out.

“I really am fine, though, Mrs. Bianchi,” he reassured her. “You didn’t have to come all the way here to check on me.”

Exhaling heavily, she rubbed her forehead. “Why did the wolves attack you?”

“They wanted… Kali’s kid. I just… happened to be there.” And if he weren’t, Kai never would have come to save them. And Jax would have been in serious danger.

“You ought to be more careful, Sehun.”

Sehun licked his lips and said, “Mrs. Bianchi, can I ask you something?”

“What is it?”

“You told me to go work for Kali. And you said that the Rexits are taking over the town. You wanted me to… have Kali on my side. For my own safety, I presume. You trust the Rexits.”

She was quiet. Sehun continued.

“And I have grown to learn that not all Rexits are bad. And Kali certainly isn’t. He is striving for a home for the Rexits. For wolves who were exiled from their packs and their children who are seen as outcasts. While every Aequus and Regnandi has a home to go to, a pack, the Rexits are just stranded with no territory. Nothing. I don’t want Kali to be on _my_ side. I want to be on _his_ side. And I think… we all should. This is our home. We need to protect it. But it doesn’t mean we can’t open it to those who don’t have one.”

Mrs. Bianchi pinned him with an earnest look. “I thought you wanted no part in the Rexit business.”

“I learned that the wolves that attacked me and Jax were… Regnandis.”

Mrs. Bianchi did not look surprised.

Sehun closed his eyes for a moment. “They were willing to hurt a child to drive the Rexits out of Oakenbury. This isn’t just _their_ territory. This is also _our_ home. We get to have a say in this. Aequuses should not just be silent bystanders that don’t mean anything to these wolves. We also have wolf blood running through our veins. Just because we’re non-shifters, it does not mean we’re insignificant. And I am tired of Regnandis treating us like we’re nothing. My parents built a home here. I was born here. And if I’m a non-shifter, I’m still a wolf. I want to do something for those wolves that are being oppressed and murdered for not following the rules the Regnandis set.”

Mrs. Bianchi took hold of his hand. “Your motive is noble, son. But we are still only Aequuses. The Rexits and Regnandis have been at war for decades. What can _we_ possibly do?”

“We can give the Rexits a voice,” said Sehun. “Oakenbury is our home, too. And I say we tell the Regnandis that.”

“You won’t get the other Aequuses to side with you, Sehun. They heed the Regnandis, even if they want to steer clear of the Regnandis’ way completely.”

“They won’t listen immediately. But we can do it, slowly but surely. One by one. We can convince them to see the truth. Aren’t you tired of not… mattering to anyone because you’re not strong enough? Maybe we are strong enough.”

“The truth was that your parents were also killed by the Rexits, Sehun. And if you side with them, you will alienate the Regnandis. And that means, you become their enemy, too.”

“I don’t care anymore!” he yapped. “I don’t care about alienating the Regnandis. I don’t want to bend for them. I don’t want to heed their songs. I want to stop them from hurting more people.”

Mrs. Bianchi’s lips pressed into a thin line. “All right. What do you want me to do?”

“Kali wants an alliance. With the Aequuses. He wants to show to them that he comes in peace and that all that he wants is to share a home with us. He has already acquired the biggest factories in Oakenbury. He has the most lands than anyone that’s ever lived here. He is taking the town for himself. And I’m going to give you the advice you gave me. It won’t the worst idea to have him on our side when he is done expanding his territory. And his alliance offers us security, Mrs. Bianchi. Something the Regnandis never would because we don’t matter to them. It’s not just for us. It’s for our children, too. And those that would come after that. Kali is treating us as equal. That’s why he’s offering a negotiation and not ordering us to kneel like the Regnandis.”

“You make a compelling case,” said Mrs. Bianchi, looking a little conflicted. “But still, it will be difficult to convince Aequuses to support the Rexits’ cause. Especially since the Rexits do not have rules, no pack, no leader.”

“If you can get me to meet some of the Aequuses in town, I will try everything I can to get them to see my point.”

She rose to her feet. “I’ll see what I can do. But you have to promise me to stay safe.”

“I promise,” he said, not believing much in it. He no longer cared about being safe.

* * *

Later that day, the doorbell rang again. This time, Sehun caught the strong whiff of wolves immediately before he opened the door and stared at Jack and Vergel.

“What are you guys doing here?” he asked.

“Need you to come with us,” said Jack without any humour. He looked tired and sleepless, and grouchier than usual.

“To where?”

Vergel stepped before Jack before the latter could say something harsh. “Kali has been looking for you. He wants to see you.”

“Okay,” said Sehun. “I wanted to go see him, but I couldn’t exactly drive, and my car is still—”

“Oh, fuck,” Jack grumbled and grabbed Sehun’s arm before hauling him out of the house.

“Hey!”

“Quit whining. The last time I slept was two nights ago. You do not want to test me right now.” He dragged Sehun to the SUV parked messily along the sidewalk.

Sehun climbed into the vehicle and wondered what happened at the Regnandis’ last night after he had left the house.

“Is Jax okay?” he inquired while Jack climbed into the driver’s seat and Vergel into the front passenger seat.

“He is all right,” said Vergel. “A little shaken up. So, he hasn’t left his father’s side. He refuses to go anywhere without Kali.”

“And what about Kali?”

“Oh, he’s mad as a hornet,” scoffed Jack, smirking as he pulled the car to the road.

“You say that like it’s a good thing.” Sehun grimaced.

“It might mean I will get to rip off some Regnandi heads soon.”

“Not a certain petite little redhead, though,” said Vergel. “Am I right, brother?”

Sehun caught the sight of Jack’s jaw tightening. “Shut the fuck up, Vergel.”

“Don’t think I didn’t notice the way you eyed that redhead last night, dude. And your songs aren’t exactly _not_ dirty when you think about him.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I heard your songs early this morning when you went on a run. I believe your exact thoughts were, _musthavesexwithhim._ ”

Jack slammed the back of his fist against Vergel’s face. Sehun gasped as Vergel groaned and wiped the blood that dribbled down his nose.

“You bastard!” Vergel bayed and lifted a fist before Jack stopped him.

“I will drive us into a tree.”

Dropping his fist, Vergel hissed, “I’ll get you later for that.”

“Are you okay?” Sehun asked, blinking blankly at Vergel.

“Yeah. He’s just mad that his filthy ass is never going to get that dainty, expensive-looking Omega that literally looks at like him like he’s a globule of dirt stuck to his shoe.”

“Wait a second. Are you talking about… Noah?” Sehun muttered and then leaned forward in his seat to gape at Jack. “Noah? Jack, no offence, but even _you_ could do better.”

Jack lifted his arm to elbow Sehun in the face but stopped himself. “You two better shut up right now before I kill you.”

Vergel continued to tease Jack a few more times until they reached the manor.

Kali was waiting for them in Jax’s room.

Sehun’s heart sank when he found little Jax curled up against his father’s side on the bed, clinging tightly to Kali’s arm like he never wanted to let go of his father. He looked up at Sehun with big, misty eyes.

“Sehun, how are you?” asked Kali, frowning when his eyes landed on Sehun’s wounded neck.

“I’ve had better days… But I’m just glad that Jax is okay.”

Kali glanced at his son and planted a firm kiss to Jax’s head. Then facing Sehun again, he said, “I can’t… thank you enough for…” he trailed off, eyes turning red.

Sehun lowered his gaze, gnawing at his lip.

“If it weren’t for you, they would have…” He did not finish the sentence, looking to Jax. “Hana told me about what Kai did… to save you. But he also saved my son nonetheless. Even if he… shouldn’t have.”

“Wait, you’re not mad at him?”

“He’s family,” Kali sighed, massaging his temples. “They all are. I wouldn’t forgive them for letting it happen. But I… I am willing to be thankful to _anybody_ that saved my son. He’s all… that I have left… and the reason why… I am fighting this hard for a home for the Rexits.”

“The Regnandis who attacked… Did you know why they—”

“To get me to surrender, I know,” he murmured. “They always fight dirty first. But this isn’t the last of it. Now, they will get more serious. I need to know that you will also be safe. From now on, I… don’t want you to come around here anymore.”

Sehun’s jaw fell. “What?”

“It will not be safe for you, Sehun.”

He stepped closer to the bed. “I don’t care about that.”

“You are dangling between the Rexits and the Regnandis, Sehun. It’s hard to see which side you’re on.”

“I am on your side! After what happened last night, I want to take those Regnandis down, too. Kali, I know I don’t have the strength to fight wolves. But I can help in other ways. Trust me.”

Kali heaved a sigh. “The Regnandis will come for you, too.”

“Good. Because I want to give them a piece of my mind.”

Kali smiled at that. “All right… Just know that this is now your home as much as it is Jax’s. We will all protect you.”

Sehun nodded his head.

* * *

When Jack drove him back home that evening, the Beta looked unnerved.

“What’s wrong?” Sehun asked.

“Something,” Jack muttered, scowling ahead as he pulled into Sehun’s driveway. Sehun followed the wolf’s gaze and glimpsed the cars that were parked outside the Regnandis’.

“Who do you think…” he trailed off when he saw people climbing out of the cars.

They were dressed impeccably and held their heads high like royalties. The tallest man among them straightened his jacket’s lapels before running a hand through hair.

“Fuck,” let out Jack.

“What?” asked Sehun.

“That’s the motherfucker Ryder.”

Sehun glanced at the man again. Eight other men and women followed him up to Kai’s house. “Who’s… Ryder?”

Hana sauntered out of the house first. She did not seem surprised to see those people on her front yard. But the hard expression she sported was not welcoming either.

“One of the bigshots,” said Jack. “One of the strongest Regnandis. Leader of four packs.”

“What? Seriously? Do you think he’s here because of last night?”

“Probably. Which means your boyfriend’s about to take a dip in some hot bubbling water.”

Sehun turned his attention back to the man called Ryder and the others that stood before Hana. Ryder wore a smug smile on his pale face, red curls falling over his eyes.

“Are you scared of him?” Sehun asked.

Jack snorted. “No?” he said. “But that’s the jackass that killed Kali’s mate and forced Geun to step down from his pack. If he’s here in person, it means Kai’s in deep shit.”

 Sehun’s eyebrows furrowed. He hated the way his heart was pounding now.

He then saw Kai walk out of the house. He bowed his head curtly to Ryder and the others before he civilly welcomed them into his house. Sehun quickly rolled down the window to see if he could hear something.

Before Ryder could step inside, Noah burst out of the house and pounced onto the man, hugging him excitedly.

“Brother!” Sehun heard Noah screech.

Ryder ruffled Noah’s hair and gave him a kiss on the cheek before he followed the redhead into the house.

“Well, we ought to let Kali know that the big kahuna is in town,” said Jack as he picked up his phone. “You were eager to see a fight, weren’t you? Buckle up. It has just started.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next (special) chapter will be in Yixing's POV :)


	29. Chapter 29

The doorbell chimed when he walked into the diner. Nova, in his arms, cooed at the sound of the bell. That was how the baby often realized that they were in the diner.

Yixing wiped a blob of drool from a corner of his son’s lower lip and stuffed the binky back into his mouth. The diner was always thronging with a familiar crowd in the evenings and it was no different today.

His eyes scanned the diner for a particular olive-skinned, spectacled boy with a beautiful shock of black mess on his head. When he spied Sebastián on the other side of the counter, Yixing approached him with a small smile.

The boy’s head whipped up before his eyes darted to Yixing and the baby. His lips instantly stretched into a grin. And it had Yixing’s heart twisted in a turmoil like it always was whenever he met those encaptivating brown eyes.

“ _Hola_ , Yixing,” greeted the boy with a muted excitement, and half a smile. “Nova.” He nodded his head toward the baby.

“Hey, Sebastián,” muttered Yixing as he perched on a barstool, seating Nova on his lap. The baby wanted to bounce on it. Yixing held him in place.

“The usual?”

Yixing tried to keep his gaze low and away from that heart-rending look the boy gave every time they met. The look was a blend between an understated embarrassment and explicit shyness. It was the look that haunted Yixing’s dreams these nights.

“Yeah,” Yixing sighed. “Nova was getting cranky being inside all day. Just took him out for some fresh air.”

Sebastián dropped his head, lips still holding onto a coy smile. Yixing wasn’t really sure how or when they had even exchanged their names. But it must have happened sometime during Yixing’s frequent visits to the diner. It was not long after that when Yixing got a hold of Sebastián’s phone number. He was not exactly popping in here every now and then for their out-of-the-world chili cheese fries per se. Or for Nova to have a change of scenery. Most of Yixing’s visits had a lot to do with the lanky, angular, young, _beautiful_ Latino that ran the place.

Yixing had no clue what was it about the boy that had his heart clamouring. His days and nights were often encroached by the thoughts of the boy. His senses were overwhelmed by the human’s discernible scent. Terrible. Horrifying. Even though Yixing’s head was telling him to stay as far away as possible from Sebastián, his mind and heart were commanding him to do the complete opposite.

“Here’s your chili cheese fries and root beer,” Sebastián said when he returned to the counter with Yixing’s order before he wended his way to the booths to tend to his other customers. Biting his lip, Yixing lowered his attention to the food, which he did not really have the appetite for. The events of last night had left him exhausted and worried.

He knew he should not have followed Kai to help Sehun and Jax. It would definitely land them in trouble. But as much as he had tried to hold himself back, Kai was his brother and he had also always seen Sehun as a brother. He doubted that he would have stayed put and done nothing last night after finding out about the plans the Regnandis had for Jax. But still, interfering with the Regnandis’ plans was stupid. Especially since he had so much to lose right now.

He tightened an arm around his son, holding him close. He had to be there for Nova. That was all that he cared about. If it weren’t for Nova, he would not be tolerating all the bullshit that went around in the echelon.

Nova spat the pacifier out, eyes wide and mouth eager, as he stared at Yixing’s fingers that were holding a fry. He wanted it.

“Too spicy for you,” Yixing told the baby and gave it a kiss on the head. “And you already had your dinner.”

Nova was a blessing. Sure, Yixing had married the wrong person just because he was convinced that it would be a good idea to strengthen the pack. He had never loved her. He had never loved anybody. But he had never expected to receive a blessing like Nova. Nova was his. His blood. His own. And he could not wait to watch his son grow into a beautiful, strong wolf. He needed to be here to see it all happen.

He stayed in the diner until the fries went stale. Nova had fallen asleep after he had gotten bored from playing with the buttons on Yixing’s shirt. The diner was also almost empty.

A gentle hand on his shoulder startled Yixing. Sebastián retrieved his hand at once when Yixing turned around to look at him. “Sorry,” said the boy. “That doesn’t seem so… comfortable.” He glanced at the baby leaning against Yixing’s chest as he slept. “Maybe you can lay him down in a booth.”

Sighing, Yixing moved to a booth and settled Nova down before he plumped into a seat himself, resting his forehead against his clasped hands, elbows planted on the table.

“Have to close early today,” Sebastián said as he mopped up some spilt coffee on the floor. “Sheriff’s orders after that wolf attack last night. No shops should be open after seven.”

Yixing was hardly listening.

“Everything… okay?” asked Sebastián after a while when he no longer had any more customers to entertain. He slipped into the seat on the other side of the table and removed the apron.

Yixing leaned back on the seat and exhaled exasperatedly. “Just stressed out about things.”

Sebastián licked his lips. Yixing tried not to look at those lips. “Does this… have something to do with you calling me last night to ask for Sehun’s number?”

Yixing kept mum.

Sebastián frowned. “I feel like… everyone’s keeping something from me.” He sounded miserable as he said it. “I always… want to help everyone. But I can tell when I’m not really wanted.” He chuckled lifelessly.

Yixing’s eyebrows furrowed, too. “I’m sure that’s not it, Sebastián. You’re probably just overthinking it.”

Sebastián shrugged. “No one is telling me what happened last night. You call asking for Sehun, and then he gets hurt? And you’re… also hurt.” His gaze fell on Yixing’s bandaged wrist. Then as though with an absent mind, he slid a hand over the table and wrapped it around Yixing’s wrist.

That instant, Yixing’s heart skipped a beat, and the muscles in his jaw tautened while his stomach clenched in pain. As much as he knew he should withdraw his hand the very instant, he let Sebastián hold it. The boy’s slender fingers slowly and tentatively slithered down the back of Yixing’s hand.

Then with a jolt, Sebastián retrieved his hand, face wilting with mortification. The way he blushed had Yixing’s blood coursing.

Yixing drew his hand away from the table. This was ridiculous. They were no one to each other. He should not be wanting to see the boy, let alone enjoying the warmth of the boy’s fingers upon his skin.

“All that I know is that Sehun has a complicated relationship with your family because he used to date your brother. But I feel like there’s something more… and people are keeping things away from me.” Sebastián looked and sounded tired. Yixing was not sure why the boy was talking to him about these things. They barely knew each other. “You know, I was born in Oakenbury. I’ve been here all my life. But I’ve… always felt an outsider. It’s weird.” He snickered to himself.

When Nova stirred, kicking a foot in his sleep, Yixing lightly patted his back to calm him.

“Look,” said Yixing. “Maybe it’s a good thing that you don’t know everything. Sometimes you’re better off not getting involved.”

Sebastián’s eyes turned sad. But he tried to hide his disappointment by looking away, shoving the glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I should close up soon.”

“Right,” Yixing muttered but did not move. Neither did Sebastián. Their gazes eventually locked again, and they did not look away from each other until Yixing cleared his throat and turned to pick his sleeping son up into his arms.

“You sure you’re going to be okay?” inquired Sebastián.

Yixing did not know what that was supposed to mean. And he realized he needed to get out of here before he could say or do something foolish. “You don’t have to worry about it.” Rising from his seat, he stepped out of the booth.

“I hope whatever you’re stressed about gets solved. And your arm gets better.”

Yixing ignored that. He pulled out his card and handed it to the boy to pay.

“Oh, no, you don’t have to,” said Sebastián, declining the card. “It’s on the house.”

“I don’t need to be on the house,” spat Yixing with a dreadful feeling in his chest. He watched the boy’s face wither into a pained expression. He tried to hide that, too. “Just take it.”

Blinking confused and sadly, Sebastián accepted the payment before returning the card to Yixing. “Did I say something wrong?” he asked as Yixing started for the door.

He paused in his tracks but did not turn around to face the boy. “We’re no one to each other for you to worry about it, okay?”

It sounded harsher than he was intending it to. And his own chest tightened. He should not have come here seeking solace. He was only looking for more trouble.

“I… know that,” murmured Sebastián. “I just meant…” he trailed off, voice breaking.

Clenching his jaw, Yixing stormed out of the diner. After buckling Nova to the baby seat, he climbed into the driver’s seat and started the engine. For nearly half an hour, he sat in the car idly, thoughts muddled, breathing laboured.

The first time he had seen Sebastián was at the school when they were younger. Even then, Yixing knew there was something about the boy. Sebastián was quiet, reserved, bookish, lonely. He did not have many friends. Or any friends. Yixing buried every last silver of his curiosity about the boy in the deepest, darkest pit of his heart because he knew it was not natural and it was wrong.

But when he returned to Oakenbury and saw the boy working at the diner, all that confusion came rushing back. Yixing used to believe that he was capable of holding himself back and prioritizing the things that were more important for his family and pack. But then he found himself visiting the diner more often than not, wanting to meet those shy brown eyes again and again.

Gripping the steering wheel, Yixing slammed his forehead against it. It made no sense. It felt like there was a hole in his heart. He had never been used to letting anybody know about his vulnerabilities. He had always masked his loneliness behind a calm façade. He supposed every Alpha had a different way of coping with Soulbinding. And that made Yixing wonder if this was what Soulbinding was.

He raised his head and glimpsed Sebastián, who walked out of the diner before locking it up. Drawing in a shaky breath, Yixing exited the car.

“Sebastián,” he called, and the boy halted with a shock.

“Yixing,” he muttered. “You haven’t left?”

Yixing rubbed the back of his neck, glancing around him. “You’re going home?”

Sebastián took a moment to reply. “Yeah. I was going to take the bus home.”

“I can give you a ride… if you want.”

The boy looked uncomfortable. Yixing expected nothing else after what he had just thrown in the boy’s way. “I’m fine. Thanks.” They stood still for a stretch. Sebastián kept his head hung. Then adjusting his glasses, he said, “Good night.”

As the boy walked away, Yixing quietly exhaled a “good night” before he climbed back into the car and slumped against the seat.

“I don’t know what I even want from him,” he grumbled to himself. His head didn’t know. His heart did.

* * *

Sometimes he wished his father was here. But most of the time, he chose not to think about the man. It brought far too many confusing emotions that he did not want to deal with. While his two brothers expressed their emotions deeply and strongly, Yixing chose to keep them muted. Sometimes, he did not even acknowledge those emotions. Especially when it came to grief. He would suppress them even as when he was a wolf. But Kai and Jaehyun let their songs be heard, their feelings be known by those that could hear them. Kai’s songs were mostly sad, pure, strong. Only their father could sing a calling that strong. Jaehyun’s were loud and expressive and angry. Yixing kept his grievances and wants a secret. His songs were quiet. But sometimes, he wanted to scream, too. He wanted to tell his brother that he was still loved by his family and no one really resented him for what had happened to their father. He wanted to tell his mother that she would be all right. He wanted to tell his sister that it was okay to have loved another. And sometimes, he wanted to sing for a mate.

He was a wolf. A proud one. But oftentimes, he wondered how free he would be if he weren’t a Regnandi.

As he pulled into the driveway, his eyes narrowed on the cars parked outside his home. “What the…”

He knew who was here.

When he entered the house with Nova sleeping against a shoulder, Chanri walked up to him. “Yixing,” she called in a low voice.

“Is he here?” asked Yixing, although he could already smell the bastard’s scent.

Chanri frowned and nodded her head slowly. “Let me take him to bed. You should get in there,” she told him, tearing Nova away from his arms.

Removing his jacket, Yixing strode into the living room where he found Ryder and the other _Princeps_ seated on the couches. Noah had snuggled close against his brother’s side, clinging to the man’s arm.

“Father sends his regards, Brother,” Ryder told Noah. “He and Mother miss you greatly. And they hope you are doing fine here.”

Noah smiled a strained smile. “I… am,” he said with an unconvincing tone that made Ryder’s lips curl knowingly. “Everyone’s very nice to me. Especially Kai.”

Kai was standing, arms crossed over his chest. Their mother stood close by with a worried scowl on her face. Jaehyun and Jeni stayed close to the wall. Don must still be at work. All heads turned to Yixing when he entered the room.

“Yixing,” Ryder said coolly as he rose to his feet. “We haven’t met in a while.”

Yixing gingerly shook the guy’s hand. “Ryder.”

Not all _Princeps_ in the Regnandi echelon were as stuck up as Ryder and his family. But most of them were. They were the top-tier packs of the echelon. The strongest. The biggest. The most powerful. Their families’ pedigree stretched to the very first shifters. Purebreds. They called all the shots. They kept the echelon “clean”.

“Now that we’re all here,” Ryder said, sitting back down. “I’m sure you know why we had to make such a sudden appearance.”

Kai’s face pulled, but he said nothing.

Ryder glanced up at Kai with a cocky smile. “What happened, Kai?” he asked in a steady, friendly voice.

Kai swallowed hard. “Someone… I know was there last night. Your wolves would have… attacked him if I hadn’t interfered. I know I shouldn’t have, but he’s a friend. I couldn’t... not do anything.”

“Huh,” Ryder hummed. “A friend? That’s more… important than your cousin?”

Kai kept quiet.

“Do we know this friend?” Ryder then asked.

“He used to be close to the family,” said their mother, stepping forward. “An Aequus. He’s innocent, Ryder. He should not have to be harmed.”

Ryder arched an eyebrow. “But this so-called Aequus was… at the Rexit’s residence?”

No one gave him an answer.

“Was he there on his own?” Ryder proceeded to ask. “A victim of the Rexits?”

“No,” spat Jaehyun when no one would say anything. Ryder smirked.

“Then why is he exactly your _friend_?” When Ryder looked to Noah, the latter looked away, lips pursed. “Brother, do you know of this friend?”

Noah nodded his head with a conflicted look on his face. “He is innocent, Brother,” he muttered.

“I see.” Ryder sighed. “What is an Aequus doing at that traitor’s?”

When Noah did not answer, Ryder curled an arm around the Omega’s shoulders.

“You don’t know, Brother?”

Noah bit his lip.

“He works for Kali,” Kai blurted out. “He’s Jax’s caregiver. Nothing more.”

“Ah,” Ryder let out. “There it is. So, you botched up our plans instead of helping us to save an Aequus that’s working for a Rexit, who’s taking up _our_ territory. Is that right?”

“I’m sorry,” said Kai.

“Oh, no, you’re not,” Ryder laughed. “If you were, you wouldn’t have done it in the first place.” He smiled. “Anyway, Father is furious. Not only did you ruin a great chance for us to have a leverage, you also gave them a chance to be extra cautious now. Kali might even get on the offensive to be safe.”

Yixing noticed Kai’s hands balling into fists at his sides.

“This is a punishable crime,” said one of the _Princeps_ that had come along with Ryder. “This is your second chance, Kai. And so far, you are doing more to hurt us than to aid us. Whose side are you on?”

“You did leave your pack to become a Rexit for a mate,” accused another. “Can you really be trusted?”

“You dragged your siblings into this, too.”

“The penalty for the three of you should be exile from the echelon.”

Ryder raised a hand to stop the others. “Now, we don’t have to go that far. Yet. Kai is still my brother’s mate. I doubt he would make any more trouble for us. First warning is fair. But you must do something to make up for our loss.”

Kai’s jaw tightened and so did Yixing’s.

Ryder stood up and walked over to Kai to drape an arm around Kai’s shoulders. “Listen, Kai. We’re not the enemy. The enemy is the one taking refuge in _your_ home. This territory has belonged to your ancestors. It is rightfully yours. Not your uncle who hasn’t played by the rules. Am I not right? Your father strove to keep this town safe. Kali is just taking it all away again. They are all _pests_ on our land. Now, I’m going to give you an ultimatum. You help us get rid of the Rexits, and we’ll overlook this little blunder of yours. I know nothing gets past you and your family in this town, and that’s why you’re here. When there’s no more living space for _our_ kind, where will _we_ go? _Our_ territory, Kai. Remember that. You are now in your father’s place. You have his duties to fulfil.”

“Ryder,” called their mother. “Perhaps you should get some rest.”

Ryder lifted a finger to shut Hana up before he continued. “Next time, you will not be the one interrupting one of our plans. You will be the one executing it, won’t you, Kai? You will not be the one saving your little Aequus friend. You will be the one ripping his head off.”

“Brother,” Noah said softly, taking hold of Ryder’s arm. “I have missed you. Maybe Hana’s right. Can we give it a break for tonight? I would love for us to catch up.”

Ryder pinned Noah with a look and pulled away from Kai. “Of course, Noah.”

“I’ll show you to your rooms,” said Hana, and she ushered everyone out of the living room.

Ryder paused to survey Kai from head to toe before he followed Noah.

“You okay?” Yixing asked Kai, raising a hand to his brother’s shoulder.

Kai slowly shook his head.

* * *

He found Kai on the porch steps the next morning, sulking and rubbing his eyes.

“You look like you could use some coffee.” Yixing offered him a mug as he perched on the steps next to his brother.

“Thanks,” said Kai.

“Wow, you look grouchy as hell,” he remarked with a smirk.

Kai groaned. “I’m so fucked,” he let out.

“Literally or…?”

“Both,” Kai huffed. “Ryder is insane,” he said in hushed tones.

“What do you mean?” Yixing asked, taking a swig of his coffee.

“Noah came to my room last night and said that his brother was _paying attention._ So, I had to… God, don’t even…” He scrubbed his face with a hand. “The thing is, Noah hates it as much as I do. The whole thing was… terrible.”

“Well, Ryder’s a sick fuck, what’s new,” Yixing sighed. “He’s not going to get off our backs until we give him what he wants. No sexual innuendos intended.”

“He has something planned.”

“I know. He wouldn’t be letting us off the hook this easily otherwise,” Yixing noted. “And he came all the way. There’s definitely something.”

Kai was staring in the direction of Sehun’s house.

“Did you… talk to him?”

Kai lowered his head then. “Yeah. I told him everything and… he hates me more than ever now.”

“You’re not going to go after him again, are you?” Yixing scowled. “Kai, I know that it’s difficult for you, but you have to fight it.”

“You think I’m not?” Kai growled, glaring at Yixing. “Let’s not talk about it right now. It’s not safe.”

Yixing exhaled heavily. “For what it’s worth, I think you made the right call the other night.”

“And it got us into all this shit.”

“I know we would have been better off if we had just stayed put, but _you_ wouldn’t have. I think this is better than to lose Sehun.”

“I care about Jax, too. It wasn’t just Sehun… I couldn’t have stayed put. I just… needed a little push, I guess.”

Yixing gave Kai’s shoulder a squeeze.

“That makes a weak Alpha, doesn’t it?” said Kai.

Yixing said nothing.

“It should have been you,” Kai then muttered. “You should have been the leader of the pack.”

“No. Dad always wanted you to be the leader. Remember how he always used to say that there’s kindness in you that as powerful as your determination?”

“Lies,” Kai scoffed.

“No, I don’t think so. I just think… you have two very different responsibilities now. And it’s throwing you for a loop. You don’t know how to fulfil them both at once. Because you can’t.”

“Thanks, Yixing.”

“Guys,” Jeni called when she approached them on the porch. “You better come inside.”

Exchanging a troubled look, Yixing and Kai ambled back into the house. They found Ryder and Noah seated at the table along with their mother and Don.

“Ah, good morning,” Ryder told Kai and his brother with a bright grin. Noah sat quietly at his side. “Kai, your mother and I were just talking about when it might be a good time to hold your wedding.”

Kai blinked. “What?”

“I think it’s about time you made it official, no?” said Ryder, ruffling his brother’s hair. “Sit.”

Kai took his seat. “What’s the… rush for it now?”

“Ryder has been sharing some disturbing… information,” said their mother with a paled face.

“More wolves are breeding outside their echelons,” said Ryder as his expression hardened. “It’s almost… like a disease. They Soulbind with Rexits, Aequuses and even worse, humans. Over the past couple of decades, the lines between Soulbinding and echelons have been blurring, and we don’t know why. We suspect that it might be the tainted bloodlines. The Rexits are rising like cockroaches.”

“Soulbinding has nothing to do with biological factors,” spat Yixing. “That’s the whole point of… souls binding.”

Ryder scoffed. “Then you would also have the chance of Soulbinding with a crocodile. That’s not how it works. Which is why, we’re going to bring in a new law. Regnandis who Soulbind outside their own echelon will no longer be exiled. They will be terminated just like the vermin they bind their souls to.”

“What?” rasped Kai. “Most of the Regnandis are family, Ryder.”

“So?”

Kai went completely still.

“All the _Princeps_ are hoping you’d be onboard with this new law. We cannot allow for more Rexits to rise. Kali is proof enough that we should have killed him along with his bitch and child and not exiled him. Now, look at him. He’s leading an uprising against us. He’s already bought half of his town. Soon, he’ll have more power here than you do. But you’re going to help us get rid of him before he takes over the forests, too. Play ball and I’ll drop the whole thing about you helping an Aequus that’s working for a Rexit. Besides, you are my brother’s mate. I am willing to be lenient.”

Before Kai could say a word, there was a sudden wave of a familiar scent.

“Ryder!” A roaring voice thundered from the outside.

Hana shot up to her feet and stormed out at once before the others could act. Yixing quickly followed. “Kali,” she gasped, bursting out of the house when Kali marched up the porch steps.

“Come out here, you fucking coward!” Kali growled as Hana raised her hands to his chest to hold him back. “I’m here. On my own. Why don’t you come out and fight me instead of sending your little ass-licking poodles after crippled son?”

“Kali, please.” Hana pleaded. “Things are already bad as they are.”

Kali’s anger faltered as he slowly ceased to a stop and looked down at Hana with his eyebrows drawn together.

“You have to leave,” Hana exhaled. “Please. Please. Do this for me. For Kai.”

Kali, gritting his teeth, glowered into her eyes before he looked up at Yixing and then back at Hana. “You’re sheltering a man who killed so many of us in cold blood, including helpless little children,” Kali let out, a hand flying up to grip a side of Hana’s head, a thumb pressing into her cheekbone, so that she would be forced to look into his eyes. Yixing almost lunged at him, but he stopped himself. “But you stand against _me_. You’re as bad as they all are.” He withdrew his hand Hana’s face and pulled away before he turned around and stomped down the steps. Climbing into his SUV, he drove away, tyres screeching against the road.


	30. Chapter 30

“ _Your family could find us here,_ ” said Sehun worriedly as Kai guided him to the back of his house, tugging at Sehun’s hand gently.

“ _They will not,_ ” the wolf said confidently. “ _They know we’re out here. They won’t bother us._ ”

Kai wanted a kiss. Sehun could tell that it had been driving the wolf crazy all evening. He had been wearing that annoyed, longing look ever since Sehun showed up at the doorstep for the dinner he was invited to.

“ _So, do you think they know… what we’re doing?_ ” asked Sehun, cheeks growing hot and red. Thank God the evening was dark enough for Kai not discern his flushed face.

Kai shrugged. _“They are nosy. So, probably.”_

_“Do they… know everything that runs in your head?”_

_“No,”_ Kai laughed. _“But they do know everything when we’ve shifted unless I don’t want them to.”_ He pulled Sehun to a wall and pressed him up against it.

_“Is there like a turn-on, turn-off switch for your songs?”_

_“Hmm… Sort of.”_

Sehun lowered his gaze and head, heartbeat quickening, as Kai leaned in, raising a hand to pin it against the wall. _“Just a kiss?”_ he muttered without meeting Kai’s eyes.

 _“Mm-hm,_ ” hummed Kai, eyelids falling heavy as he inched closer.

Sehun told himself that this was okay. Kai was his boyfriend. He did not have to be scared. Even if Kai were an Alpha. So, he licked his lips and lifted his head, eyes shut.

Their lips brushed.

And Kai pulled back all too soon, as though to inspect Sehun’s expression. _“Good?”_ he asked.

Sehun nodded his head shyly. Why was the idiot even asking…

Smiling, Kai leaned in for another tender kiss.

A few minutes into the kiss, Sehun decided that he liked it. And he liked Kai for kissing so good.

But then with a jolt, Kai broke the kiss and withdrew. Still dazed, Sehun lazily cracked his eyes open and looked at his new boyfriend, who was leering at him hungrily.

 _“What?”_ Sehun asked in a coy whisper.

Kai bowed his head and pressed his nose to a crook of Sehun’s neck, nuzzling deeply to inhale Sehun’s scent. Taken aback, Sehun flinched slightly when Kai’s nose poked into a side of his neck, sniffing him eagerly. He then felt Kai’s lips part against his neck, teeth teasingly grazing along his skin there.

Sehun thought Kai might just sink his teeth in and bite him, but he backed away suddenly with a horrified expression.

 _alpha!alpha!alpha!_ Sehun smelled Geun’s scent.

 _“Kai,”_ he then heard the man’s gruff voice. Pulling away from the wall, Sehun turned around to look at Geun, who was walking over to them. _“Sehun, you should go home now.”_ The man was smiling his usual smile, but there was something grave behind that smile today.

 _“Dad,_ ” Kai began to protest.

Geun scowled at his son, then. _“Have I not told you that you shouldn’t be letting your guard down like this?”_

Kai hung his head in embarrassment. _“I was not going to do anything. We weren’t going to do anything.”_

Do what, Sehun wondered. What guard?

Geun huffed. _“Sehun, go home.”_

Sehun bowed his head and began to walk away. He paused once to glance over his shoulder at Kai, who was being berated by his father. For what, Sehun had no clue.

He went back home, perplexed. But he could not erase the taste of Kai’s lips from his mouth. His fingertips brushed his lips softly as he entered his house.

 _“This is dangerous,”_ he heard his mother say from his parents’ bedroom. It sounded like an argument, so Sehun was ready to tune them out.

But then he overheard his father say, _“You think I don’t know that? They have been good to us. But at the end of the day, they are still Regnandis and we are still Aequuses.”_

 _“They’re friends,”_ argued his mother. _“Imagine how betrayed they’d feel if we shifted our allegiance.”_

_“That’s the point. There will be no allegiance. We do not have to bow our heads to those Regnandis. We are own people.”_

_“What happened to keeping our heads low?”_ It sounded like his mother was close to tears. _“To not partaking in any of the shifters’ affairs?”_

_“And that is exactly why we should not get involved in any of Geun’s or his family’s matters. Those Regnandis were asking too many questions. It was as though they wanted to make sure that we are close to Geun. And they were also asking a lot about Geun’s eldest.”_

_“She’s with a human Soulbinder.”_

_“I didn’t tell them much. But they were Alphas. And they will come back. We best watch our backs. I want Sehun to stop hanging out with that Kai kid.”_

They quieted down suddenly, and Sehun could not hear anything more even when he tried to sneak closer to their room. His father not wanting to bend his knees to those Regnandi Alphas was nothing new. But Sehun knew something else was up this time.

* * *

There was something about having Kai close. Even if they were not in the same room, Kai being only a few blocks away made it seem like they were sharing the same headspace. Sehun could almost tell that Kai was undergoing something stressful. He supposed that was what it meant to be Soulbinders.

He sat on the couch, a bowl of untouched macaroni in his hands. His mind was somewhere else. There was an overwhelming amount of Alpha scent in the air in the neighbourhood this morning. It made his knees tremble.

Ryder.

Was Jack right about Kai being trouble for what he had done the other night? What sort of trouble? What kind of a man Ryder was if he were behind Kali’s exile, the death of his Soulbinder, Geun’s banishment from his own pack? One of strongest, most powerful Regnandis, Jack had said. What did that entail? How much power did Regnandis like Ryder wield? Was he the kind of Regnandis Kali was fighting against?

Sehun shook his head. He did not know why he was overwrought with worry. It felt as though he could not take one breath without dreading about what was going on the Regnandis’ house right now. He set the bowl on the coffee table and picked up his ringing phone.

“Mrs. Bianchi?” he said.

“I spoke with some Aequuses. They are willing to meet you, Sehun,” said the old woman on the end of the line.

Sehun’s eyes widened. “Really?”

“Yes. They would hear you out. Why don’t you come down to the café this evening after it’s closed?”

“Of course,” Sehun exclaimed, although his heart was hammering against his chest nervously. Hanging up, he stared at the few missed calls from Sara. He would have to get back to her later.

* * *

Before heading downtown, Sehun stopped by Kali’s manor to check up on Jax. The boy was awake and in his bed, watching a cartoon on the TV. Sehun was glad to see that he was able to let go of his father’s side for a while.

“Hey,” he told the boy as he entered the room.

Jax looked up at him and coughed weakly. “Sehun,” he whimpered out.

“How are you feeling, kiddo?” inquired Sehun, taking a shy seat on the edge of the bed.

Jax did not answer. His face was pale, his eyes dark.

“You know,” Sehun muttered. “Now you have a fun, badass story to tell your friends.”

Jax’s eyes went big as he looked up at Sehun. “What?”

“I wish I had a story like that to tell my friends. You were attacked by wolves and you survived. That’s really brave and strong.”

“I… did nothing.”

“Of course, you did. Remember that wrench? In that moment, if you hadn’t helped me, phew. We would have been in trouble.”

Jax’s face lit up then. “Really?”

“Yes.” Sehun grinned and ruffled the boy’s hair.

“Do you think Maza would find that cool?”

“Anyone would.”

Sehun paused when Jax’s gaze turned toward the door. He glanced over at Kali, who was standing in the doorway with his arms folded over his chest. He looked mad about something. Might be about that new Regnandi in town.

Rising from the bed, Sehun approached Kali. “The Regnandis—”

“The _Princeps,_ ” Kali muttered and turned around before walking away. Sehun followed.

“The _Princeps_?”

“Have never heard of them?”

Sehun shook his head. “My parents never told me anything about them. My grandparents never talked about them.”

“What about your Regnandi boyfriend, then?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Sehun spat furiously. Kali pinned him with a sidelong look. Sehun cleared his throat. “I have nothing to do with that family anymore.”

“I’m that family.”

Sehun bit his tongue. “You know what I mean, Kali.” He caught the man’s arm to halt him. “The _Princeps._ What are they?”

Kali sucked in a deep breath. “They’re descendants of the pedigrees. The originals. They made the rules at the start of it all. They still do. We’re strong. But they’re stronger. And it’s a circle no other can enter.”

Sehun frowned. “And… Ryder—”

“Is one of them.”

“I heard that… he…”

“Not him specifically. But his entire family. Nothing gets past his father.” He started to walk away again. “I went down there this morning.”

Sehun’s eyes popped out. “You… did?”

“Hana wanted me to leave. Didn’t want me to do something stupid.”

“So, they’re all afraid of these… _Princeps_?”

Kali ran a hand through his greying hair. “They’re in town now. And more will come. And I’m ready to tear their heads off.”

“Do you think a fight is… inevitable?”

“Unless they find a leverage.”

“Is Jax safe, then?”

“I have Rexits guarding the area. Don’t worry about it. But you should worry about yourself. Don’t wander too far and stay safe. Once they figure out what you’re up to, they’ll bring the fight to you, too.”

Sehun nodded. “I’ll be safe.”

* * *

When he reached _Bianchi’s Café_ , he climbed out of his car and took a few breaths to calm his nerves. He needed to sound and look strong. He could not afford to stammer now. He needed to convince these Aequuses to give Kali a shot.

Turning away from the car, he started toward the café. He was forced dead in his tracks when he spied the black car parked on the sidewalk before Kai exited it.

What the…

Kai was walking towards him. Sehun had half the mind to stomp away like he did not recognize the Alpha.

“What do you want?” he found himself asking instead, eyebrows furrowed deeply.

“I told you to stay out of it, Sehun,” spat Kai through his grit teeth. “You’re going to get yourself in danger. And these Aequuses you’ll be dragging with you.”

Sehun blinked. “How did you…”

“Small town and I have eyes and ears everywhere. Did you really think you could set up this little rendezvous without me knowing?”

Sehun clenched his jaw and fists. “Well, that you know, what are you going to do about it?” he growled.

Kai scowled. Sehun’s heart was thundering. _alpha!alpha!alpha!_ He wanted to bow his head and bend his knees to his Alpha. But he told himself that his willpower was stronger.

But then Kai grabbed hold of his arm and yanked him forward until the tip of their noses was almost brushing. “You turn around and go back right now,” Kai ordered.

Sehun swallowed hard but continued to glower. He had to heed. He must heed. _alpha!alpha!alpha!_

“No,” he hissed and shoved Kai back.

Kai bared his teeth then. “This is a bad time, Sehun. You defy me right now and I swear I will make you regret it.”

That did it. Sehun pushed Kai back. “Do your worst, goddamn you! Who the fuck do you think you are?!” With that, he shoved past Kai and started toward the café, chest heaving. It felt wrong. Wrong to disobey the Alpha. But Sehun hated him more than he loved the man this instant, that he could not care less about the agony that was spreading all over his heart.

He entered the café and found Mrs. Bianchi seated at a table that was occupied by three other men. Betas, all of them. They rose to their full heights and looked at Sehun with sceptical expressions.

“So, you’re the Aequus that’s turned to the Rexits,” said one of the Betas. “Even after your parents were killed by them.”

Sehun sighed. “I’m not here to vouch for the Rexits. I’m here to speak for our safety and our families’. And Kali vouches for _that_. Oakenbury does not belong to only the Regnandis. It’s also ours. So, if you want our kind to matter for once, then hear me out. If not, you can walk out right this instant.”

The Betas stared at him for a moment before they sank back in their seats.

* * *

 ** _Entr’acte_**.

Kai found Ryder on the back veranda, leaning over the balustrade. With a smug look, Ryder turned and met his flustered expression as Kai leaned over the balustrade at his side.

“Some of the Aequuses are meeting up downtown,” Kai informed the other Alpha in a quiet voice.

Ryder did not reply immediately. At length, he said, “What do you suggest we do?”

“We send some of your wolves to ambush them,” said Kai.

“Why? They’d just think it’s the Rexits.”

“No. Sehun’s there and I made sure he’d find the Regnandis at fault. Me, in particular.”

Ryder turned around and crossed his arms. “And?”

“I don’t want any of them dead. Just hurt. Enough to rile up the Aequuses.”

“Just like you riled up Kali? He showed up here this morning wanting to rip my throat out,” Ryder scoffed.

“My mother took care of that, didn’t she?” said Kai, scowling. “We’re getting close, Ryder. You do your part and I’ll do mine. Soon, the Rexits and the Aequuses will be fighting the Regnandis on our side.”

Ryder exhaled heavily and gave Kai’s shoulder a pat. “I’ll go get it done, then while you plot our next move.”


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The following chapter might contain triggering contents to some, so read at your own discretion.

“You make a good point,” said Alfred, one of the Aequuses once Sehun was done pleading Kali’s and his case.

“But the Rexits have no rules,” said Tibor. “If we decide to stand up for them, there is no guarantee that one day, they’d turn against us.”

Sehun rubbed his temples. “I know there is no guarantee. But at least we’d be on the right side. The Rexits are willing to protect us and our homes. But the Regnandis only care about themselves.”

“We’re going to need some time to think about this,” said Ali, the last Aequus. Sehun bowed his head.

“I know you do,” he sighed and rose from his seat. “As an Aequus who has witnessed the betrayal of Regnandis first-hand time and again, I can tell you that when a fight comes, they will not hesitate to raze us down because we mean nothing to their echelon.”

He bade Mrs. Bianchi goodbye after thanking her for what she had done before wending his way out of the café. When he looked for Kai’s car, he noted that it was not there anymore. But there was a strange, unfamiliar blend of wolf scents in the air. Ignoring it, he headed back home.

Pulling into the driveway, he glanced out the side window to look at Noah, who was squatting on the dirt road with Nova in his arms.

As Sehun climbed out of the car, Noah raised his head and frowned in Sehun’s way.

“You!” he hollered.

It brought Sehun some painful memories. He stopped but did not turn toward the dirt road.

“Sehun?” Noah called, his voice carrying across the blocks like the wind. Then rising to his full height with the baby in his hands, the Omega started towards Sehun.

Balling his hands into fists at his sides, Sehun met the redhead with a glower. “What?”

Noah halted a few feet before Sehun as his eyes fell on the wooden wolf locket resting against Sehun’s chest. “That’s… Kai’s.”

Sehun gave the locket a brief once-over before scowling at the Regnandi again. “Actually, it’s mine. I made it. And I gave it to him. As a present on his birthday.” He did not know why he wanted to rub that fact in the redhead’s face. Especially since all that he wanted to do right now was to yank that locket off and lob it over it fence. Then rolling his eyes, he said, “Why are you even talking to me?”

Nova cooed. The baby looked huge in the redhead’s skinny arms. “Do you really still love him?”

The question caught Sehun unawares. He did not want to have such conversations with Noah. So, he turned around to get back to his house. Noah caught his arm then, forcing him to stop.

“He still loves you,” the redhead muttered, retrieving his hand from Sehun. “He still has your picture on his desk.”

Sehun pinned him with a black look. “Then what are you still doing here, being a hindrance?” he snapped.

Noah’s eyebrows drew together in a frown. “It’s… complicated.” He sucked in a breath. “But you and I both know I’m not the problem here.”

“No, you’re not,” Sehun spat. “Kai is. He’s the problem.”

“I liked him when we were kids,” Noah mumbled, patting the baby’s back. Sehun arched an eyebrow. “I thought he would like me back eventually. But even then, whenever we met up, all that he ever talked about was you. I hated you so much. You made me feel bad about myself. I always wondered what you had that I didn’t. But then I realized what you really meant to him. And the extents he would go to just to…” He trailed off as Nova dropped his head sleepily on the redhead’s shoulder.

Sehun gritted his teeth. “Aren’t you a little shameless to still be with him even when you know he doesn’t like you?”

Noah almost smirked, Sehun thought. “Your world is so small, Sehun. I both envy and pity you. My world is… My world is so big and complicated. And so is Kai’s.”

Sehun tried not to take that as an offence. But there it was again. The insinuation that his small world did not matter in Kai’s big world. “Look,” he sighed. “What do you want? If you’re just making conversation, I’d rather not. If you’re here to boast, then I don’t see the point. You can keep Kai.”

“You don’t mean that,” Noah scoffed. “And I still don’t see what he sees in you. You, of all people, should be able to understand him better.”

“Just because I’m a non-shifter, don’t think I won’t get down in a fight with you,” Sehun growled, even though it would be a fight he’d lose to Noah.

“I don’t want a fight with you. I’m here to tell you that you broke Kai’s heart. You were the reason he almost lost his humanity. You were the reason he lost his father. And you’re the reason he’s going to get himself killed. You think he ruined your life. You’re the one who ruined his. If you never existed, he wouldn’t be so miserable. You do not get to be so judgmental, Sehun.”

Sehun snorted, but deep inside, those words stung. “And now we’re back to square one. They abandoned _me._ I revered Geun like he was my own father, and did you know what he did in the end? Dumped me on the road like I meant nothing to him.”

“If only you knew half the story you think you do,” Noah said. “You want everyone to only hear your side of the story. Have you ever bothered about getting to know what was Geun’s story? Or Kai’s? No. It’s always the _Sehun Show_ , isn’t it?”

“Your bitterness is unbelievable. Here’s a wakeup call. Kai not liking you is not my fault.”

“At the end of the day, he’s going to marry me, anyway. You think I care about this like it’s some sort of a competition? Like I said, Sehun. Our world is so much bigger than yours. You have no idea.”

As Noah turned on his heel and started back for the dirt road, Sehun stood on the sidewalk, gawking into the night.

“What do you mean… he’s going to _marry_ you?” he blurted out, even though he did not want to hear the answer.

Noah paused and looked back at him. “Could I have been any clearer? I’d invite you to the wedding, but I don’t think you’d like it very much.” With that, he walked away, blowing raspberries into Nova’s chubby cheek.

It hit Sehun harder than he thought it would. He supposed he had always known why Kai kept Noah around, even if he expressed no interest in the Omega. Noah’s family was powerful. They were one of the… _Princeps_. Even when Sehun met Noah as a child, he knew he was nothing compared to a Regnandi Omega. Now that he knew how influential Noah’s family was, especially with Ryder as his brother, Sehun did not see how he could ever compete with that. Kai would get to be one of the _Princeps_ , with a hold on the strongest Regnandi packs. It was probably what Geun would have wanted him to do.

Why did he even need to compete…? He tried to convince himself that he did not care who Kai married or wanted to take as a mate.

But there were those dreams.

Dreams. So many dreams.

And promises. Vows.

_“Will we… get… married one day?” Sehun asked._

_Kai sat up._

_Sehun told himself that he didn’t care whatever the answer was. Well, if he didn’t care he never would have asked the question in the first place. He just wanted to prove his parents wrong._

_But the way Kai just kept silent made Sehun’s heart break a little._

_“We can get married right now,” Kai then blurted out, turning back to look at Sehun._

_Sehun sat up, too. “What?”_

_“Marriage is just a few vows, right?” Kai smiled a toothy grin._

_Sehun was confused. “Aren’t we… too young for marriage?”_

_Kai wasn’t listening. He was clambering up to his knees and taking Sehun’s hands. Sehun followed suit._

_Now, kneeling before each other, Sehun stared at Kai, completely puzzled._

_“Shall we get married?” Kai asked._

_“Uh… Sure?”_

_“Okay. Do you, Sehun, take me to be your husband?”_

They probably meant nothing. But it had left Sehun with hopes and dreams, which in retrospect, seemed like utter nonsense right now.

He stumbled into his house with a jaded mind and headed straight for the treehouse. Climbing into it, he curled up into a ball on the floor and hugged his knees to his chest. He hated Kai. He did. He truly did. He did not think he could start fresh with the man, even if he had suggested that they do. There were far too many mistakes, too many wounds to be forgotten.

But they were once each other’s firsts. First kiss, first love, first heartbreak. And now, they were only holding onto bits and strands of what was left, leaving them more pain than solace.

Sehun had not realized how much he was hoping for a future with Kai until a moment ago when he understood that there was not much of a future left for them after all. What was the point of the nest he had been building since he was three? His phone was ringing. It was Mrs. Bianchi. He ignored it, hurling the phone across the treehouse before he burrowed his face between his knees.

Part of him wanted Kai to feel the sorrow he was undergoing right now. But another part of him wanted to pretend to be strong.

Noah was right. Sehun’s world was indeed very small. And no matter how much he tried to broaden it, it always circled back to his small family, his little wolf on the dirt road, and his tiny, cold nest.

He heard the rope ladder clatter before he caught a whiff of the scent after almost an hour of silent tears betraying his eyes. His head craned up to see Kai entering the unlit treehouse. Even in the dark, Sehun could make out the frown on the man’s face.

“I’m sorry I was harsh to you earlier,” said Kai in a low voice. “Are you… all right?”

Sehun clambered up to his feet. He did not speak immediately as he gathered his breaths and composure. Eventually, when he opened his mouth, his voice broke. “You’re getting married? To Noah?”

Kai looked like he was not expecting Sehun to throw that in his face. He blinked twice, face pulling into surprise if nothing else. “Who told you?”

“Noah, that little weasel,” Sehun snapped.

Kai exhaled a heavy breath and rubbed his forehead. “That’s what you’re upset about? His brother is town and he—”

“I know all about his brother and how hard you are all trying to lick his entire family’s boot. But why would you marry… Noah?”

“Because I have to, Sehun,” he said calmly but there was a hint of distress in his tone.

“You _have_ to?” Sehun said, unable to conceive the idea itself. And the fact that Kai did not seem the least bit reluctant of marrying Noah… “Why? Because you want to strengthen your pack? You want to have a stronger footing here in Oakenbury? Is being a Regnandi so important to you that you’re willing to forsake your own happiness?”

“My happiness?” Kai scoffed. “That ship has long sailed, in case you don’t remember.”

That hurt. Sehun stopped for a second to stare at Kai. Then in a quiet voice, he said, “I’m not your happiness anymore. Is that… what you’re saying?”

“Sehun…” Kai closed his eyes for a moment to draw in a long breath. When he opened his eyes again, they were his blazing red wolf eyes. “I am tired of this constant push-and-pull.”

“Yes,” Sehun spat. “So am I. Maybe we should just end everything between us once and for all. No more going back to each other. No more promises.” He yanked the leather cord from his neck and dropped the locket to the floor.

Kai’s eyes widened. “Sehun, don’t—”

Before he could finish, Sehun stomped on the wooden wolf’s head with a shoed foot and smashed it into splinters. His heart broke once more, and he knew Kai’s did, too.

_Love. Mate. Mine._

He thought he heard Kai’s wolf song. Shuddering, he took a step back as Kai lunged forward and dropped to his knees to gather the broken fragments of the locket into his hands. He did not raise his head for a long time as he stared at the wooden pieces laying on his palms.

Sehun still remembered the hard work he had put into that locket. He had wanted it to be special for Kai. He remembered how nervous he had been about giving Kai that measly present for his birthday when Kai had gotten so many better gifts. And he remembered how happy Kai had looked when he received the locket.

“I don’t belong in your big world,” Sehun whispered, swallowing a sob. “I don’t even understand your world. We’re better off on our own.”

The song that sung between their souls could not be ignored in that moment as Kai rose to his feet, dropping the silvers of wood back on the floor, and met Sehun’s bloodshot eyes.

“My soul was bound to yours from the minute I saw you on the dirt road,” Kai muttered, voice thick like there was a lump in his throat, as he closed the distance between them. Sehun stepped back until a wall of the treehouse was pressed against his back. Kai lifted a hand to cup Sehun’s jaw next, fingers digging into the corners of it like he wanted to crush it. “But do you know when I first fell in love with you? When you gave me that locket. You were right. I am a coward. I am not my father. I never will be. I won’t get those years I lost my humanity back. I won’t get to live my dreams with you. But what makes me wake up in the morning is you and the thought of my locket being safe with you, knowing that you’re wearing it, knowing that you’re still hoping for those dreams to come true.”

Kai’s scent that cloaked around Sehun left him a little lightheaded. It was both soothing and alarming at the same time. And right now, as he gazed into Kai’s wolf eyes, his heart was drumming in his throat.

“You don’t belong in my world, Sehun. But I belong in yours.” His fingers around Sehun’s jaw tightened, dragging Sehun forward until their lips met in a forceful crash. Kai broke the kiss almost immediately before he tilted his head to the other side and smashed his mouth against Sehun’s once more. It simply took Sehun’s breath away.

He was angry at Kai. For many things. For reasons that he could no longer keep count of. But inherently, he was still and Omega longing for his Alpha. For years and years.

His hands flew up to grab Kai by the lapels of his jacket, but he did nothing else except kiss the wolf back with an equal amount of desperation. The heat that spread through his body then was mind-numbing. It was as though he could feel his body readying itself for what was about to come.

Kai shifted his hand from Sehun’s jaw to the back of his neck, drawing Sehun closer as his other arm snaked around the Aequus’ waist. His lips kissed Sehun’s experimentally at first, sucking gently on them one by one before his tongue lapped along them. By the time he pulled back, Sehun’s lips felt tender and warm.

Hooking his arms around Kai’s, Sehun buried his face in the crook of Kai’s neck and whispered, “Don’t.”

He did not want to Kai to back out now. He did not want Kai to get married to Noah. He wanted Kai to stay in his small world.

He heard Kai growl softly into his ear before he lowered his lips to a side of Sehun’s neck to pepper it with feverous kisses that had Sehun biting back on a moan as he cocked his head to the side. Cradling Sehun’s head with one hand and holding the small of Sehun’s back with the other, Kai pressed his lips into the angle where Sehun’s neck met his shoulder. Sehun clenched his eyes, fingers sliding into Kai’s hair to clutch at it while a soft whimper escaped his lips.

Parting his mouth, Kai scraped the skin with his teeth, just a little, teasing a bite, but not going all the way. He wanted to mark Sehun. And Sehun had wanted it since he learned what marking their mates meant for the shifters.

When he lightly ran the tip of his tongue along the spot he had chosen to mark, Sehun’s eyes almost rolled back as his breathing quickened.

But then Kai stopped, nose brushing against Sehun’s neck. “I can’t… You’ll get hurt if we…”

“I know,” Sehun yielded for once. There was no way of getting around this. They were going to be miserable either way. But at least they would have one night to call their own, one night to make up for everything they had lost in all those years, one night to keep their promises.

He cupped the sides of Kai’s head so that he could look into the man’s eyes. Sliding his fingers down, he brushed his thumb along Kai’s lower lip before he leaned in and kissed it. As Kai’s breathing slowly hardened, Sehun kissed him harder, parting his lips to invite Kai’s tongue into his mouth.

After yanking Kai’s jacket off, Sehun’s fingers fumbled over the buttons on Kai’s shirt. A soft hiss broke from his teeth when Kai nipped on his lip. Once he had managed to unfasten the shirt, Sehun shoved it over Kai’s shoulders before walking his hands down the wolf’s bare chest and abs.

Grappling his arms around Sehun’s body, Kai pulled him away from the wall. They stumbled to the mattress next without disconnecting their mouths. Every time Kai withdrew, Sehun worried that he might stop. And a few times, Kai did seem like he was hesitant but then Sehun would pull him back in for another kiss.

He ran his fingers down the cleft of Kai’s back as they took their time relishing one another’s lips, getting familiar with a heat that was missed again. Kai’s hands wandered down Sehun’s torso before they slipped into the shirt to caress Sehun’s burning skin.

Kai eventually dragged his mouth to Sehun’s neck, and leaving multiple kisses on them, he knelt up, straddling Sehun. With one swift move, he tugged the shirt over Sehun’s head and discarded it on the floor. Then for a long minute, he took in the sight laid out before him with steady breaths. Sehun’s cheeks grew hotter, and he looked away as Kai continued to stare at his bare body.

When he bowed down to plant a kiss into Sehun’s sternum, Sehun tangled his fingers in the Alpha’s hair and tried to keep his cool as Kai slowly drew his mouth down his chest. Even now, Sehun could feel the tension in Kai’s movements. He was nervous and afraid and hesitant. But at the same time, he was so tired of holding himself back that he wanted to take Sehun right here and now.

It was just this one night. However, Sehun knew nothing would be the same after tonight.

His fingers tightened around the strands of Kai’s hair when Kai latched his mouth around one of his pebbled nipples that hardened under his flicking tongue and suckling lips. “Kai,” he moaned in trembling breath, fingernails digging into Kai’s shoulder blade.

Kai then went lower, leaving a trail of kiss on the planes of Sehun’s belly before he stopped to look up at Sehun again. “Sehun,” he muttered with a worried frown.

Sitting up, Sehun crashed his lips against Kai’s and kissed him hard with his hands hurriedly undoing the fly of Kai’s pants. “I think we’ve waited long enough, Kai,” he mewled upon Kai’s mouth.

As soon as he was done unzipping Kai’s pants, the Alpha shoved Sehun back to lie down with a growl on his lip before he grabbed and pinned Sehun’s wrists to the mattress on either side of Sehun’s head. His eyes flashed red then as he claimed Sehun’s lips once more, positioning himself between Sehun’s legs.

A rough moan broke from Sehun’s throat when Kai started to grind against him, the weight of his hardening cock pressing into Sehun’s crotch. “I want to be inside you,” Kai rasped, moving his lips to Sehun’s cheek. “Mark you, knot you and make you mine.”

God _. God._ Sehun arched his body into Kai’s, locking his legs around Kai’s waist as Kai rammed his hipbones against the underside of Sehun’s thighs. “Please,” he whimpered, wanting to wither with Kai inside him.

And when it was all said and done, he wanted to smell like Kai.

Kai dipped his head to kiss the crook of Sehun’s neck where he was intending to mark Sehun. Then he slithered down to unbuckle Sehun’s trousers. He stopped to kiss Sehun’s navel and the skin beneath it before he lowered the pants to give the base of Sehun’s shaft another kiss.

Sehun closed his eyes for a moment, not sure if he could go through this whole thing without feeling mortified. But then Kai crawled back up to kiss him on the mouth before whispering, “Can I have you?”

“Yes,” Sehun was quick to answer in a raspy breath.

After kissing him one more time, Kai rose and turned Sehun around to lie on his stomach. Sehun hid half his face into the mattress and clutched at one of the blankets as Kai pelted his back with kisses with a hand stroking a side of Sehun’s waist.

“Kai…” he let out when the wolf slinked lower, hooking his fingers into the waistband of Sehun’s pants. Sehun bit into a blanket when he felt Kai’s hot lips press against his tailbone while his hands slowly drew the pants down.

Once he was completely bared, Sehun did not dare raise his head again. He waited for Kai to touch him and let him know that what he was doing was right. He wanted to hear Kai tell him that he was being good and that he was pleasuring the Alpha. He was finally ready to be vulnerable in the nest he had built for him and his Soulbinder.

He felt Kai’s fingers splay over his ass cheeks first. He sealed his lips tightly to not to let any sound out. Kai then slid a thumb into his ass cleft. Sehun sucked in a sharp, shaky breath when Kai rubbed his thumb down the puckered rim of muscles.

Shifting on the mattress behind Sehun, Kai gripped onto Sehun’s hips to kneel Sehun up.

“God,” he heard Kai exhale first and then felt the man’s mouth kiss his tailbone again. This time, he did not pull back, and his tongue darted out to lick the tailbone before it slithered further down, breaching into the ass cleft.

Sehun gasped out a moan when his opening was tongued and wetted by Kai’s saliva. It felt strange at first, for that he had never really been touched down there in such a way. But it also felt so intimate that it had his blood coursing to his nether regions.

And then Kai started sucking on it, running his tongue all over it before its tip prodded into the orifice, leaving Sehun almost breathless.

“Kai,” he gasped, a hand reaching back to grab onto Kai’s head. But before he could, Kai seized his wrist and growled.

Sehun took that as an order and retrieved his hand, falling obediently silent except to moan and whimper as Kai continued to lick his opening.

When Kai finally decided he had had enough, Sehun was covered in sweat with sparse air in his lungs. He then plopped Sehun to recline on his back again, bowing down to kiss Sehun full on the mouth.

Sehun pushed himself upright next and palmed Kai’s cock over his pants, gazing up at the wolf for his approval. When Kai only bit his lower lip, leering down at Sehun with eagerness, Sehun lowered Kai’s pants and boxers just enough to pull out the swollen member.

This was happening. And Sehun thought he was swaddled in an explosion of colours. He did not know if there could be a pinnacle higher than this for Soulbinders, but this had him reeling. They were mating.

Kai gently cupped a side of Sehun’s face as Sehun swallowed and leaned in to brush his lips against the slit of his cock. He pulled back briefly to lick the precome sheening on his lips before he bowed his head again and tongued the leaking slit.

“Fuck, oh,” Kai gasped, fingers instantly gripping Sehun’s hair, as he tossed his head back. Sehun did it a few more times before wrapping his lips around the swollen cockhead.

He did not exactly know what he was doing, but he assumed he was going the right way since Kai looked like he was enjoying it.

“Slowly,” Kai then instructed, eyes still closed, head still tossed back.

Sehun slowly took Kai into his mouth as he was ordered. Kai’s fingers loosened around his hair as a gravelly groan rumbled in Kai’s chest. Sehun withdrew before sinking back in, taking the cock all the way until it hit the back of his throat.

Kai then held Sehun in place so that he could slide in and out of Sehun’s mouth. Sehun’s eyes watered every time the tip of his cock would slam against his throat. Whenever his teeth would touch the length, Kai gave a snarl.

Pulling out completely, he drew Sehun’s face up to kiss him sloppily, all spit and tongue. All of a sudden, his kisses turned kind again, and he gently coaxed Sehun to lie back. He then momentarily climbed out of the thin mattress to step out of his pants and shoes before he pulled himself between Sehun’s legs.

Sehun could not calm his racing heart. He could not blink either. As nervous as he was, he was also exhilarated just by the thought of having his Alpha tied down inside him.

Kai bent low but did not kiss him. Instead, he said, “Are you… sure?”

Sehun did not know what Kai was referring to. But if he meant doing this with him, then yes, Sehun had been sure of it since he acknowledged his feelings for Kai the first time. Kai was his. Sehun was not his first. But he wanted Kai to be his first and last. He had made a promise and he wanted to withhold it.

“I am,” he said, looking into Kai’s eyes.

Brushing the tip of their noses together, Kai laid a soft kiss on Sehun’s lips before he spat on his fingers. Sehun planted his heels firmly into the mattress as Kai brought those fingers to his ass and spread his spit all over the opening. His hips bucked and knees turned to water as Kai stroked and rubbed the tight muscles, smearing it with his saliva.

Kai’s mouth muffled Sehun’s coarse whimper when he slid a finger in. It was discomforting, but not painful. Sehun tried not to bite Kai’s lips too much as he distracted himself with the kissing.

“Okay?” Kai asked, breaking the kiss briefly. Sehun gave a jerky nod and pulled the man back to resume the kiss. Kai fingered him for a few moments before he pulled out and spat on his fingers again. Sehun braced himself as Kai pushed in two fingers this time, almost scissoring through the opening.

He paused when Sehun whimpered out a weak cry.

“I’ll stop if you want me to,” the wolf said, even though he did not look he wanted to stop.

Sehun shook his head. “Don’t. I want you to… keep going,” he huffed out, tightening his arms around Kai’s shoulders.

Kai’s fingers eventually reached a spot that sent jolts down Sehun’s spine and he saw stars at the back of his eyes. “Does this… feel good?” Kai asked, whispering against Sehun’s lips.

Sehun did not know. It was confusing, to say the least. The discomfort was rapidly intensifying into something like pain, but every time Kai’s fingers breached into that spot, it felt like a welcoming fire. It was a baffling mixture of sensations.

He pressed his face to Kai’s shoulder to stifle his cries as Kai continued to finger and stretch him, occasionally reoiling his fingers with more spit since they had no access to any other form of lubrication at the moment. Sometimes, Kai pulled the fingers out and sucked on them before sliding them back into Sehun and watching him do that honestly drove Sehun to the edge of his sanity.

The tug between their souls had never been stronger and more apparent as it was this very moment. From the moment Sehun was drawn to turn around and meet that little, obnoxious boy to now, the song kept singing between their souls.

He never knew it would feel so beautiful to finally surrender to his Soulbinder.

“Kai,” Sehun wheezed. “I need you inside me…”

Kai retrieved his fingers as Sehun began to throb around him. “Sehun,” he breathed out and dropped his face against Sehun’s neck after slathering on enough spit on his cock. “Sehun…”

Sehun had his ankles locked at Kai’s back, arms wrapped around Kai’s shoulders and neck. He knew what came next would be no honeymoon. So, he gritted his teeth and took a few breaths to relax himself.

“You’re safe,” Kai muttered into his ear along with a few other sweet things that made Sehun feel secure. “It won’t hurt too much. It’ll be all right. I’m here. I won’t try to hurt you, I promise.”

Sehun trusted him. Even after everything, he was ready to trust his Alpha, his Soulbinder, his love, his mate.

It did not hurt as bad as he thought it would when Kai pushed the head of his cock in. He paused to let Sehun get used to the feeling first before he slid in a little further. Sehun’s body writhed and his choked back on a sob.

“Kai…” he purred meekly.

When he was all the way in, the pain heightened tenfold. Kai stopped once again to let Sehun relax. “Like vanilla and melted chocolate and babies and campfires and fireworks,” Kai whispered, kissing along the side of Sehun’s neck. “Mine, Sehun.”

Sehun then realized that Kai was not letting him catch a break. But the wolf was savouring the moment they had finally become one, after so many years of waiting.

Kai started to pull out, and Sehun moaned through his gnashed teeth, dragging his fingernails down Kai’s back, leaving long, red threads against the bronze skin. He then fisted his hands around the blankets around him and drew them close as Kai began to thrust back in. He wanted his nest to be smaller this instant and wrapped around him and Kai, to shield them from the rest of the world.

Kai did not mind it when Sehun greedily gathered the blankets around them. Suddenly, the child that was once lost in him wanted this small world of theirs to be only theirs forever. The blankets would not protect them, and neither would the nest. But he was overcome by the irrational feeling of needing to keep them safe from everyone else right now while they mated.

And Kai probably had the same need as he engulfed Sehun in his arms, swathing his Omega in his sphere of protection.

The treehouse rumbled with Sehun’s cries and moans when Kai started to pick up the pace of his thrusts. Kai would groan every time Sehun throbbed and clenched around him. With a few more thrusts, Sehun was able to swallow the burning sensation, and it became easier henceforward. Kai even reached the spot that felt good several times, which had Sehun moaning in pleasure. The realization of the fact that his Soulbinder was mating with him was greater than any pain, and Sehun focused on that.

At one point, Kai pulled himself out completely before he knelt up and flipped Sehun around. Spitting on Sehun’s now stretched opening, Kai slid back in while Sehun busily drew the blankets back to him. Kai then tugged at Sehun’s arms to stand Sehun up on his knees while he fucked into the Aequus from behind with a hand gripping Sehun’s hip.

“Sehun,” Kai moaned into his ear while Sehun held the blankets to his front before biting and tugging at them as Kai drove deeper into him. Tears trickled down the corners of his eyes when he tilted his head back to rest it against Kai’s shoulder while Kai kissed his neck. “Fuck,” Kai hissed and shoved Sehun back to the mattress.

Sehun froze in place as the Alpha pinned himself to his back, hands fiercely grabbing of Sehun’s wrists to hold them down. At this point, Kai hesitated, as though he had no clue what was happening to his body.

“Stay still,” he ordered in a growl with short, struggled whimpers. Sehun did as he was told, but then he began to feel the walls of his insides contract around Kai’s swelling cock. He was knotting.

“Kai,” he gasped faintly while the bulge grew by the second. Kai’s grip tightened around his wrists when Sehun began to squirm.

Kai pressed his forehead to Sehun’s back and groaned, as though he were in pain. Trapped under Kai, Sehun cried quietly at first before it started to feel good again. His insides relaxed and eased around the knot. They fit. It made Sehun’s belly warm.

Kai’s hands loosened around Sehun’s wrists as he drew his lips over the crook of Sehun’s neck. Giving the skin one final lick, Kai sank his teeth into it with a feral growl, bursting inside Sehun at the same time, filling him with warm, thick come while Sehun screamed at the fangs that broke and bled his skin on the neck.

What came next was a wave of relief, a dusty calmness after an avalanche. It was beyond description. Sehun wanted to stay there forever.

Kai collapsed on his back but did not pull out and continued to nurse the wound he had just manufactured on Sehun with gentle kisses while Sehun sobbed into blankets. He did not know what he was crying about. But it felt stunning and outstanding.

* * *

What an imperfect dream it was…

They were mated. Their souls were bound. There was no going back. And it had all happened when they both had least expected it.

“Why did you leave?” Sehun asked in a murmur, fingers blindly stroking Kai’s chest as his head rested on the Alpha’s arm.

His entire body was still burning, his insides throbbing and aching. But he loved every bit of the discomfort that assured him of the fact that they had just mated and made love. The bitemark on his neck stung warmly.

“Hmm?” Kai hummed.

“Why did you and your family leave me?” He needed to know.

Kai did not answer immediately. But when he did, he sounded sad. “We had to.”

“What do you mean you had to?”

Kai drew a breath. “My father was… in trouble.”

“What sort of… trouble?”

Kai closed his eyes. “Do you remember Chanri and her… human boyfriend?”

“Yes.”

“My dad was trying to… defy the top order and stand against them to… change the rules or at least bend it. So that… Chanri and I could… be with our Soulbinders.”

Sehun lifted his head to blink at Kai. “He… what?”

“He fought head-on. And that was a mistake. They saw confrontation coming and decided to get offensive. Technically, my father did not break the rules, he hadn’t defied any orders or broken any rule. But he was fighting. Hard. For us. For Chanri, so that he could save her from exile if they found out about her Soulbinder.”

Sehun’s breaths came out short and laboriously then. “What does this… have to do with leaving Oakenbury?”

“We weren’t lying, Sehun. It was to protect _you_.”

“Why?”

“The Regnandis started snooping around, wondering why my father was suddenly so interested in changing the echelon laws that’s been there for centuries. When it finally got out of hand after Kali’s banishment, Dad got even more furious and… he was challenging the top dogs. They eventually found out about Chanri’s Soulbinder and… mine.”

Sehun sat up, realizing that he was running out of breath.

“They attacked him and your parents the same night. He managed to escape but your parents… It was a mistake on their part—they didn’t know it was _you,_ but they found that your family was the closest people we knew in Oakenbury. You not being in the same car as your parents that night was… purely luck. My father agreed to drop his attempts to challenge the old rules and leave Oakenbury so long they don’t harm you or my sister’s Soulbinder. For years, we stayed away from the town and you and him. Because we knew that you were safer away from us.”

Sehun took a moment to process the information. He did not realize that his eyes were brimming with tears until one of the rolled down his cheek. “All these years… everyone made me believe that it was the… Rexits.”

“We couldn’t tell anyone that it was them. It would have turned all of you against us.”

“How could you… want to be a part of those murderous… people, Kai?”

Kai sat up and brought a hand to the back of Sehun’s head, pressing his lips to Sehun’s shoulder. “I was born a Regnandi. It is my birthright. I am not going to give it up, Sehun. I did that once and it cost me greatly. I am not going to repeat those mistakes and I’m not going to make the same mistakes my father did. I am _not_ my father.”

Sehun looked at him. “They killed… my parents.”

“They did,” said Kai. “The Rexits are not in this equation. But some of them are just as bad, Sehun just like how some of the Regnandis are good. Kali was once a Regnandi, too. He might be pack-less right now, but he was once one of us. And you don’t know how many people he’s hurt for his pack. You shouldn’t fight _his_ fight. I want you safe and I want you nowhere near the Rexits. And it isn’t fair for you to ask the other Aequuses to fight a fight that’s not theirs. You’re going to get them hurt, too.”

“I’m not going to sit back and watch the Regnandis rule us all. Not after everything… they’ve done.”

“If you’re on the Rexits’ side, you will be fought back just the way the Rexits will be. You don’t have the strength to fight with packs of Regnandis, Sehun. And the Rexits have their own agenda.”

Sehun stared at Kai. “I am going to fight, Kai. Even if you’re one of those Regnandis. I will have every single one of the Aequuses turned against those Regnandis. Whether I do it with the Rexits or not.”

Kai licked his lips. He seemed to be lost in his thoughts for a moment. He then took hold of Sehun’s face and stared into his eyes. “There’s… something you need to know. I didn’t think you’d get involved in any of this, and I didn’t want you to, but now that you have and… maybe it’s better that you know.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I have to get married to Noah. It’s the only way.”

Sehun could almost hear his heart shatter. “Kai… Why are you doing this to me—”

“No, listen. I want you to fight the Regnandis. But not so stupidly by teaming up with the Rexits.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Not right now. But you will soon. Some of the Regnandis prefer diplomacy to the aggression the Rexits are showing them. You side with the Rexits, you will be seen as aggressive, too. Don’t lose the upper hand you have right now.”

“Kai, what are you talking about?” Sehun started to pull away from Kai before his attention was averted to his buzzing phone on the floor in the corner of the treehouse. Crawling out of the mattress, Sehun grabbed the phone and answered it.

“Sehun, where the hell are you?” screamed Taeyong on the other end.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Mrs. Bianchi. There’s been an animal attack in her café. No one’s hurt badly but they’re hurt. Mrs. Bianchi has been trying to reach you all night!”

Sehun lowered the phone and looked back at Kai with a slack jaw.

Kai ran a hand through his mussed hair and sighed. “It was Ryder. I warned you.”


	32. Chapter 32

_“I’d take very good care of you, Mr. Giraffe,”_ Kai whispered, stroking the toy’s head after Sehun had left. He was planning to take the _best_ care of Mr. Giraffe. His life depended on it now.

Placing the stuffed animal on the bed by the pillow, gently and carefully, Kai sniffed himself. He then frowned. He did not smell bad. At least he did not think so.

_“Knockity-knock.”_

He looked up at his sister who was standing in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest. _“You can come in,”_ he told her.

Chanri ambled into the room and plumped on the bed at his side. _“Why the long face? Are you still hurting?”_

Kai nodded his head sadly, hanging it. _“In here,”_ he sighed heavily, pointing a finger to his heart.

His sister chuckled for a second before she cleared her throat and draped an arm around him. _“Now, why is that, you big, grouchy, old man?”_

Kai could not even speak about it. He was a rational boy. In spite of what Sehun thought of him, Kai fancied himself as a clever boy. He knew what was right and what was not. He could make sound judgments. He did not believe in nonsense like Sehun did. He did not believe that shouting at a boy’s face would make him love a girl. He was afraid of nothing, especially of no _nyas._ And he certainly knew not to brood over trivial matters. But nothing was exactly trivial when it came to Sehun.

Sehun… Sehun was his… was his…

He did not know. He knew it in his heart what Sehun was to him, but he could not put a name to it. Sehun was what the first day of spring smelled like. Sehun was the Hana to his Geun. Sehun was like the forest. He was the skies, the ground, the moon, the rain. But he was something more to Kai.

 _love!mate!soul!_ his heart would often sing. But he did not know what they meant. Not in a way he could understand. His heart understood. That much he knew.

 _“I told him,”_ he exhaled, leaning against his sister. _“that he smells like vanilla and fireworks.”_

 _“Oh,_ ” his sister let out, sounding surprised. _“Is that what he smells to you?”_

Kai nodded his head shyly. His mother knew what Sehun smelled like to him. He had told her. He had told her many times. In the kitchen when she was cooking, in the forest when she was running, on the couch when she was sewing. Kai told her all about what Sehun smelled like to him. It was all that he could do to not to lose his sanity over it and jump on Sehun the next time he saw him.

 _“So beautiful,”_ he mewled, hiding his face in the crook of his sister’s neck. _“But he said that… I smell like wet dogs to him.”_

Chanri broke out guffawing, laughter rumbling off her chest as she fell back on the bed. _“Oh, my God, that boy!”_ She laughed and laughed until Kai kicked her shin with a pout on his lips before he planted his face in his hands. He was close to tears. It hurt him. It pained him. It was not funny.

Even though he knew Sehun probably did not think much of it when he said it, he could not help but wonder if he would ever mean anything to the boy.

 _“Oh, Kai,”_ Chanri said once she was done laughing at him. _“I’m sorry.”_

Kai did not lift his head. He did not want to look at her. He just wanted to be alone and sniff Mr. Giraffe. Alone.

 _“Sehun is a very honest boy,”_ she said.

Yes, he was. The honest-est. Kai both loved and feared that about him.

 _“Has a bit of a sharp tongue,”_ she added. _“Fights a lot. He’s going to be quite a handful when he’s older.”_ She sighed. _“But you shouldn’t take what he said to the heart, Kai. He loves putting up a tough front, that kid.”_

 _“Maybe I really do smell like a wet dog to him,”_ Kai muttered, sniffling.

_“Well, I highly doubt that he’d kiss you on the cheek if you smelled like wet dog.”_

Kai’s head shot up. He looked at his sister with bulging eyes. _“You think he won’t kiss me on the cheek because I smell like wet dog?!”_

 _“No, no. That’s not what I meant.”_ She sat up straighter. _“Last night, when you were sleeping, I saw him kiss you on the cheek. He said it would help you get better.”_

It felt as though his whole world had upturned. For the rest of the evening, Kai remained on his bed, swaddled in his blankets, Mr. Giraffe hugged tightly against his chest. He did not know what else he could do after hearing what Chanri had said.

Sehun had kissed him.

On the cheek.

Kai was not sure if he were more overjoyed by the fact that Sehun had done that or more furious at the fact that he had been asleep when it had happened. Either way, he did not know how to deal with it. His heart was singing. Too loud. He wanted to run into the forest, break free and howl for the whole world to hear.

For the next few days, he was on cloud nine. He ran the fastest among his siblings. His father growled at him, ordering him to slow down because he was not fully back in shape yet. When he did not listen, Geun snarled and latched his mouth around Kai’s scruff, commanding him to obey.

Kai did not speak to his father for the rest of the day.

His mother, on the other hand, noticed that the spring in Kai’s step as he leaped around the kitchen while she made dinner. _“What’s up, sweetheart?”_ she asked. _“For the sake of your sanity, I’m hoping this is Sehun related.”_

Kai perched on the counter and tossed a grape into his mouth. He grinned at his mother but did not say anything.

 _“He’s in love,”_ Jaehyun commented then from where he stood, rolling his eyes. Kai lobbed a grape at him and scowled. _“Hey! Cut it out!”_

 _“Boys,”_ their mother chided gently as she continued to chop the mushrooms.

 _“I think it’s disgusting,”_ said Jaehyun. _“He’s an Aequus Omega.”_

That was a knife to Kai’s heart. _“So?!”_ he sniped at his brother.

Jaehyun made a face at him. _“So, he’s lame. He’s weak. He’s not a wolf.”_

_“Yes, he is!”_

_“No, he isn’t!”_

_“Jaehyun, Kai,”_ their father roared as he entered the kitchen with their baby sister, Jeni in his arms. He leaned in to plant a kiss on his wife’s temple before he glared at Jaehyun. _“We do not discriminate non-shifters in this pack. Am I understood?”_

Jaehyun grumbled a ‘yes’ under his breath, jaw set tight.

_“Now, get out of here.”_

Kai started after Jaehyun before his father stopped him.

 _“I’m sorry about today,”_ he told Kai. _“You weren’t listening and I… I just didn’t want you to get hurt again.”_

Kai forgave his father. Of course, he was going to forgive his father. _“It’s okay, Dad,”_ he murmured and smiled up at the tall man before wending his way out of the kitchen.

* * *

It would be another regular day. Kai was indeed hoping for an uneventful day with Sehun ahead. Well, it would not exactly be _uneventful_ if he’d even get to see Sehun.

As he stuffed his books into the locker, his nose twitched at the familiar scent that had had him enslaved for years now. With a smile on his lips, he turned to look at Sehun, who was walking up to him, his face as stoic and unreadable as always. Kai’s heart fluttered the same way it had the first time he had met Sehun on the dirt road.

Sehun came close and stopped a couple of feet apart. He was wearing a strange expression. One that spelled confrontation and deliberate provocation. It was as though he were ready to pick a fight with Kai for no purpose.

 _“You know Kiena?”_ he then asked nonchalantly.

Kai knew her, sure. Why was Sehun asking about her? He cocked an eyebrow. _“Yeah?”_

Exhaling heavily, but not heavily enough to seem apologetic, Sehun bluntly said, _“I’m going out on a date with her.”_

Kai wanted it to be just a bad dream. Or he wished he were dying instead. It was not that bad, was it? It certainly felt like it. In the blink of an eye, everything changed for him. The first time he had felt such an anger, such staggering negative emotions was when Sehun jumped on his brother to practically worship him. He had never hated Yixing so much in his life than he did in that moment.

But this time, it was much worse. Along with anger came disappointment, resentment, confusion, frustration, misery. Because this, there was nothing he could do about. This was not about Sehun surrendering to an Alpha. This was about him never wanting Kai. The truth came as a hard, merciless blow. He wanted to rip out of this human body and wreak havoc on everything around him.

Most of all, he wanted to break down.

He slammed the locker shut and stomped away without another word. He had to get away from here. If he stayed any longer, he might end up doing something really stupid.

Like telling Sehun that he was in love with him and he wanted to kill Kiena right now.

* * *

 _“You should at least talk to him,”_ said his mother, not looking up from her computer. _“Keep him company.”_

 _“I don’t want to, Mom,”_ Kai whined. _“Jaehyun can have him.”_

_“Your father is trying to get into his family’s good books. The least you can do is make sure little Noah feels welcome. Go now. I’ll be out in a second.”_

Kai groaned and made his way out of the study. He did not know why _he_ should have to be the one to entertain the _Princep_ boy. He was in no mood to talk anyone either. Not after what had happened with Sehun the other day.

He stopped near the dining hall to eavesdrop on what the _Princeps_ and his father were talking about. He did not understand their discussion. He did not understand why they chose to bring the little boy along. And why _he_ had to be the one to keep the boy company.

He found the redhaired boy in the living room, sitting on his folded legs on the floor, chasing ants with his forefinger.

Kai cleared his throat.

The boy craned his head up to look at Kai, his green eyes blinking innocently. Kai licked his lips. _“Hey, Noah,”_ he said, managing a small smile. _“You look bored.”_

Noah rose to his full height, which was not much, and dusted his pants. _“I am bored,”_ he said in a small voice, blushing.

Kai rubbed the back of his neck. _“Do you want to keep me company for a while? I have video games and comic books.”_

 _“Comic books?!”_ he said excitedly. Kai grinned.

As they made their way upstairs, Kai led the Omega to his room. When he took his seat on the bed, Noah sidled close to him, so close that their knees were touching. Kai did not mind.

 _“I have_ Spider-Man _,”_ Kai said, handing Noah the comic books he gathered from the box.  _“And this is my_ Superman _comics collection.”_

 _“Wow!”_ Noah rasped. _“It’s so cool!”_

_“Really?! You think so?”_

_“I love_ Superman _! You have the oldest issues!”_

Kai loved that Noah seemed genuinely interested. He turned to rummage through the box for more comic books. And then he heard Noah say, _“Kai? There’s an Omega staring at us.”_

Kai looked up so fast as his nose stung with Sehun’s scent. _“Sehun?”_ he gasped.

 _“Who’s this?”_ Sehun inquired grouchily, marching into the room with his arms folded over his chest. Kai wondered why he looked so angry. Did his date with Kiena go bad? Oh, how Kai hoped that it had.

 _“This is Noah. He’s… my father’s friend’s son. We’ve known each other since we were practically born,”_ he told Sehun and returned Noah’s kind smile.

Sehun still looked mad. Kai was confused _. “Well, can I talk to you? Alone? Without this kid here?”_ he asked harshly.

Kai cleared his throat. _“He’s not a kid. He’s our age.”_

 _“What?”_ Sehun looked to Noah with something like disbelief. _“He’s… tiny.”_

 _“He’s a Regnandi Omega. They’re all tiny. I mean, dainty.”_ If only he weren’t so in love with Sehun, Kai figured that he would have fallen for such a dainty Regnandi Omega.

 _“An Omega?”_ Sehun said with a smug smile. _“So, you’re useless.”_

 _“Sehun!”_ Kai clamoured. He was offended _for_ Sehun, too.

Noah jumped up from the bed, shouting _, “I’m not!”_

 _“Yes, you are! All male Omegas are!”_ Sehun argued.

_“I’m a shifter! I’m a Regnandi!”_

Sehun went uncharacteristically silent then.

Kai gripped his jaw and rubbed his nape. _“Noah, can you give us a minute?”_

As soon as Noah was out of the room, Kai pinned Sehun with a glower.

 _“What do you want?”_ he demanded.

 _“Why are you letting that obnoxious little jerk on your bed?”_ Sehun shot back.

 _“It’s_ my _bed. What’s your problem?”_ Kai spat. He was not sure if he meant to sound so harsh. But he could not stop himself once he started. _“I bet you let Kiena on_ your _bed.”_

What did that have to do with anything?!

 _“What?”_ said Sehun with a grimace.

Kai could not do this right now. He was far too upset to think straight. He looked away. _“Just go.”_

 _“I will,”_ spat Sehun. _“I just came to tell you that my date with Kiena went great!”_

Kai clenched his fists. Sometimes, someone needed to remind Sehun that he was very good at provoking an Alpha shifter who could literally rip his head off from where he stood. Not that Kai ever thought of doing that. God, no.

 _“Well, I’m happy for you!”_ he ended up saying.

_“Fine!”_

_“Fine!”_

As Sehun stormed out of the room, Kai panted with a heaving chest, half of his heart urging him to run after Sehun and the other telling him to stay put so that he would not make things worse.

After a few seconds, Noah returned to the room and looked at Kai with a sad frown. _“Are you okay?”_ he asked.

When Kai did not answer, the redhaired boy slipped a dainty hand into Kai’s and held it. Kai let him for a moment before he pulled away and told Noah to give him some time alone.

* * *

 _“What’s wrong, son?”_ his father asked when he found Kai on the porch later that evening after the _Princeps_ had left.

Kai shook his head, not wanting to talk about it.

His father let out a heavy breath and took a seat on the porch steps next to him. _“Did I ever tell you the story of how I told your mother I loved her and that I wanted her to marry me and be the mother to my pups?”_

 _“No and also don’t tell me,”_ Kai groaned.

His father chuckled. _“I had to beg her.”_

Kai blinked. _“No, you didn’t. Mom loved you from the beginning. You’re her Soulbinder. Everyone knows that no one loves like you and Mom love each other.”_

 _“True,_ ” said his father. _“But she didn’t know that immediately. It’s… different from person to person, from wolf to wolf. I thought I would die without her if she refused me. But she needed some time. She was always smart, cautious, calculative. Even if I were her Soulbinder, she would not step foot into something that was risky even if it were for love. But for her children, she would move mountains. Still, if she knew she had a choice, she would not put her family in danger.”_

_“Unlike Chanri.”_

His father smiled at him then.

Kai bit his tongue and lowered his head. _“Unlike… me.”_

 _“Life is full of choices. You are part me, you love with everything you have, and you’d fight for that love, regardless of consequences. But you’re also part your mother. You know that you_ do _have a choice. But you’re too young to make such a decision.”_ He pulled an arm over Kai’s shoulder and nuzzled his nose into Kai’s hair to sniff it. _“I am going to everything in my power to make sure that you’ll never have to make that decision.”_

Kai swallowed hard. _“Maybe it won’t be up to me, after all. I’m not his Soulbinder, Dad.”_

_“Give him time. You loved him even before you understood what love was. You cannot expect him to be the same as you. Take your mother for instance. Sehun just needs some time. You’re going to have to be patient, son.”_

Kai nodded slowly. He would apologize to Sehun tomorrow. Besides, he did not think _he_ could live without his Soulbinder either.


	33. Chapter 33

What his father said to him that evening stuck with him for a very long time. He could not get it out of his head. He _did_ have a choice. And so did Chanri, so did everyone. It was just a matter of being strong-willed. Kai could do that. He knew that if he could help himself, no one would have to pay.

As the months passed, he noticed the changes in Sehun’s physique. They were not all that prominent, at least not as prominent as Kai’s changes were, but every day, he noticed something different about Sehun that he hadn’t the day before. He was growing up, but not like the other boys. The way Sehun’s supple skin glowed in summery days, the slender figure of his waist, the delicate fingers that flexed, the rosy cheeks and lips, the ruddy hair that had grown a shade darker… Everything about him now made it even harder for Kai to not look in his way.

Kai would keep his distance, nonetheless, knowing well that Sehun was not the only one who was undergoing changes. Some nights, Kai would try touching himself under the covers to the red-hot memories of Sehun standing so close to him earlier that day, to the faint scent of Sehun’s skin that was still clinging on him. His breathing was laboured, his lower lip curled between his teeth that sank hard into it to muffle any sounds, although he was sure his family already knew what he was up to. That was the thing about being in a pack. It was difficult to keep secrets.

And once he was done, he’d mope for a while, losing some sleep over how pathetic he was. Why could he have not fallen for a Regnandi instead?

He noticed that as they grew older, Sehun rarely smiled at him. Not that he was exactly Mr McGiggles when they were younger either, but now, it almost seemed like Sehun was always on his guard when he was around Kai.

That unnerved Kai.

Things were getting worse at home, too.

His father and mother were always holed up in their study. Some of the _Princeps_ came and went more often. And most of the time, they left with a dissatisfied moue on their faces. Later, he’d find the massive black wolf, once rough and proud and young, brooding in the backyard, exhausted, upset and worried. The white wolf would sidle at his side, rubbing her head against the black wolf’s neck to comfort him. They’d sit there for a while, listening to the wolf songs that sang between them.

Kai knew what his parents were distraught about. Everyone in the family knew. It was hard to keep secrets from each other. And Chanri was the guiltiest of all.

Slowly, she began to withdraw from the pack. It was hard. She stopped running with them. And it was killing her. But she thought that she was causing trouble for everyone, especially her father. Kai, on the other hand, began to realize that he was also contributing to the hardships the family was facing.

Sehun found himself another girlfriend later that year. Even though Kai could not even bear the thought of Sehun being with someone else, he began to understand that there wasn’t anything that he could do to stop it. Sehun made his choices. And Kai was not one of them. And perhaps it was for the best.

The next time the _Princeps_ visited, Noah and Ryder, his older brother, came along. Noah stayed for a few more days. Kai’s heart dropped when he saw the boy, who was taller now, grown, his green eyes glimmering like a couple of gems, his pale skin dusted with faint freckles. He was beautiful. Very beautiful. But his scent did nothing to Kai.

He did not smell like fireworks or vanilla.

But Kai realized once again that he did have a choice.

Noah liked him. A lot. He was shy at first. Then as he grew more comfortable around Kai, he liked holding Kai’s hand, kissing his cheeks, wearing his shirts, nuzzling his snoot under Kai’s jaw when they ran as wolves…

Ryder, on the other hand, was not Kai’s biggest fan. The day he visited, he deliberately bumped his shoulder against Kai’s, told him to stay away from his little brother, called him a weak wolf, asked Kai if he needed a stepdad because he was going to marry Geun when his wife was dead, said that Kai would never lead a pack. Kai did not like Ryder either. He was a snob. A mean, conceited snob.

One evening, when they returned from a run, and were perched on the porch steps, Noah said, _“I like you, Kai.”_

It was the first time anyone had ever said that to him. Kai, in spite of being reluctant, smiled at the Omega. _“I like you, too,”_ he muttered. He did like Noah. Who wouldn’t? Noah would be a perfect Omega for any Alpha. But there were no songs between them.

 _“Do you want to… go out with me?”_ Noah then asked, cheeks turning florid.

Kai figured why not.

He had a choice.

It did not feel like it was the right one, though.

* * *

 _“What about Sehun?”_ Chanri asked one day over dinner. Kai glanced at her and arched an eyebrow at her bitter expression.

 _“Sehun has a girlfriend,”_ muttered Kai.

 _“This is for the better,”_ said Yixing. _“If you truly like Noah, I don’t see why you two shouldn’t be together. It would certainly put us in a better light with the other Regnandis.”_

 _“You mean in case they find out about me? For what?”_ Chanri spat furiously. _“He’s not your Soulbinder.”_

 _“Some things are bigger than Soulbinders, Chanri,”_ Kai shot back at her. _“Unlike you, I’m trying to help instead of being so stubborn that you’re willing to put us all through hell.”_

 _“That’s enough,”_ said their father, sounding tired. _“No more of this talk. Kai is allowed to make his own decisions.”_

Chanri slammed her hands on the table then. _“He’s allowed to make his own decisions?! This isn’t his decision, is it?!”_

 _“Chanri, calm down,”_ said their mother.

 _“No, I will not.”_ She shot up to her feet and faced Geun. _“I know that you all are being ‘put through hell’ by me. Then let me go. Let the_ Princeps _banish me! I’d rather be a Rexit than—”_

 _“And have your Soulbinder killed, too?”_ Yixing asked her, scowling. _“When did you become so selfish?”_

 _“Selfish?”_ Her wolf eyes glared back at her brother. _“You wouldn’t understand until you find your Soulbinder!”_

Yixing sighed, shaking his head.

Kai spoke then. _“What is your problem, Chanri?! If I want to date Noah, that’s my business. So, butt out!”_

 _“You’re lying to yourself,”_ she scoffed. _“You’re all just doing this to make me feel bad.”_

That was when Geun rose from his seat and left the room with his hands balled into fists at his sides. Frowning, Hana went after him after pinning her children with a disappointed look.

Jaehyun and Jeni stayed quiet, keeping their heads low.

 _“You’re being a real dick right now, Chanri,”_ said Yixing with a heavy breath and made his way out of the dining room.

* * *

His romance with Noah did not last very long. Every moment he was with Noah was filled with thoughts of Sehun. Which was not fair to any one of them. Being a wolf was not easy. They could try and force themselves to make a choice they did not want to, some could even live with it, but their hearts would always know whom to sing its song to.

Kai decided to end things with Noah. And he made another decision that day, too. To leave this whole Soulbinder business behind. His father was in a tough spot. His family was being watched like a hawk goggling its prey. The last thing he needed right now was to give his father another headache. It would not be the end of the world if he did not have Sehun to himself. They’d still be friends. He’d know that Sehun was safe and healthy. He’d know Sehun was happy. And perhaps that would be enough.

He would just have to find a way to fight the urge to bite Sehun every time he smelled him.

 _“Are you all right?”_ asked his father, leaning against the doorframe of Kai’s bedroom.

Kai sat up on the bed and shrugged. _“I feel bad… He really liked me.”_

Geun sighed and entered the room. _“He’ll get over it.”_

_“Still. It doesn’t make me feel any better. I was just… trying to do the right thing, but it felt like… I was being suffocated.”_

_“It’s difficult to be with someone else once you’ve found your Soulbinder,”_ his father said, running a hand through his hair. _“But not impossible.”_

Kai looked up at the man worriedly. _“It feels impossible.”_

_“Maybe now. But you’re still very young, Kai. And on that note, you shouldn’t give up on all of this so soon. Sometimes, you’d fall. But you’re going to dust yourself off and march on. Fight for what you believe in.”_

Kai stared at the man for a moment. _“What do you believe in, Dad?”_

Geun glanced out the window, eyebrows furrowing. He then smiled at Kai and started for the door before pausing to look at Kai again. _“I believe in my children.”_

That was a burden to Kai.

He was ready to move on, or at least shut down the part of him that was pining for his _love!mate!soul!_ since he was a child. And then Sehun kissed him.

* * *

 _“It was our fault,”_ said Yixing, his bloodshot eyes vacant as he stared at the wall.

 _“Yixing,”_ Hana chided, her own voice cracking. Kai’s hands had not stopped shaking since he left Sehun’s. He was aching to run back to him right this instant. He did not want to leave Sehun alone. But his parents needed him back home.

 _“His parents are dead because of us,”_ Yixing let out, as though in disbelief. _“Because they were close to us.”_

 _“It’s a warning,”_ said Jaehyun. _“They will come back and finish what they left unfinished if we kept this up.”_

 _“How long do you think it will take for them to find out about Kai and Chanri’s Soulbinders if they have already suspected that the reason Dad is fighting their rules is because one of us has taken a non-Regnandi mate?”_ pointed out Yixing. _“They know. They know about Sehun, too.”_

Chanri was still sobbing in a corner. She did not know where her boyfriend was, but he was safe. For now. He too was attacked the same night Sehun’s parents were mauled to death.

 _“We have to leave,”_ said their father in a dull voice. He hadn’t slept either.

 _“What do you mean we have to leave?”_ asked Jaehyun.

 _“Every second that we’re here, we put Sehun and Matt in danger. The_ Princeps _will stop once we’re away from them. I will stop fighting them. I was too aggressive. They were alarmed. If anything, this was all… my fault.”_

Hana held her husband’s hand and leaned her forehead against his shoulder.

 _“Where would we go?”_ asked Yixing.

_“To some other territory we own.”_

_“So, we’re leaving our own territory because of the_ Princeps _? Because of… some non-shifting Aequus and human?”_ spat Jaehyun. _“This is our home, Dad.”_

 _“Our home is where we’re all alive and safe together,”_ Geun snarled back. _“We cannot put Sehun in danger. We must leave Oakenbury.”_

Kai could not move or talk. His heart was hammering against his chest. His head was pounding. When he could finally find his voice, he grabbed onto his father’s arm and looked at him with tears blurring his vision.

 _“We cannot… leave him behind,”_ he croaked out weakly. _“He has… no one now.”_

Geun raised a hand to his son’s shoulder. _“But he’ll be alive and safe.”_

 _“Dad, we cannot leave him behind,”_ he said again, a tear rolling down his cheek. _“It’s… Sehun. Sehun… He’ll be… devastated.”_

 _“Kai,”_ his father said sternly. _“The other Regnandis will come for him if we don’t leave him behind. I cannot protect him. He’s not part of the pack.”_

Kai’s eyes burned with fresh tears. _“But he’s_ my _pack, Dad. He’s mine. We can’t abandon him.”_

Geun clenched his eyes for a moment. _“We will speak no more of this. Start packing. We leave in the morning.”_

* * *

He grew stronger, faster, sturdier. He was a different man in just less than a year. A man. A wolf. He was angrier than any of them.

He left a trail of dead animals in the woods every day that belonged to the pack. He killed to keep his sanity about him. It made it easier to not to hurt others. Most of the days he spent as a wolf. And the days he didn’t, he chose to stay away from home.

His brothers tried talking to him every now and then. Kai would walk away. His mother gently told him to stay calm and move on. Kai never listened. His sisters saw him as a monster. Kai did not care. His father always looked at him with an apology in his gaze. Kai never forgave him.

Yixing caught him smoking one day. _“Dad would be so pissed when he finds out,”_ he said, smirking.

Well, Kai was not exactly trying to hide it. _“Good,”_ he spat and took another drag.

Sighing, Yixing joined him under the tree. _“Can I have a puff?”_

Kai handed him the cigarette. Yixing took a drag before snubbing it out on the forest ground. _“Hey!”_

_“What’s next? You’re going to become an alcoholic?”_

_“I was leaning more toward a raging sociopath.”_

Yixing shook his head. _“I know it sucks, Kai. But this isn’t the right way to deal with it.”_

Kai slammed his head back against the tree trunk. _“There isn’t a right way to deal with this. I left him. Alone. I told him that I loved him and then I left him. It’s not about… me not being able to be with him. It’s about me not being able to be there_ for _him. I wasn’t given that choice.”_

Yixing rubbed his jaw. _“So, you’re taking that out on innocent forest creatures?”_

_“Can you leave me alone?”_

His brother then pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket. _“Here.”_

Scowling, Kai examined the content of the paper. _“Whose number is this?”_

_“A good therapist.”_

Kai looked at him sharply.

Yixing smiled. _“It’s Sehun’s grandparents’. He lives with them now.”_

Kai’s face died as his heart sank to his stomach.

He called Sehun that day. He thought he would die when he heard Sehun’s voice again. And he mostly did.

 _“Hello?”_ he said and waited for Sehun’s response. When he didn’t get any, he listened to the sound of Sehun’s breathing for a moment, eyes closed, lips smiling. Then in a whisper, he said, _“Sehun, how are you?”_

Another long silence. And then he heard Sehun say, _“I-I miss you.”_

Kai rubbed his hand over his eyes before blinking them against the tears that threatened to betray him. His heart almost fell out of his chest. _“I miss you, too.”_

* * *

The next time he called, Sehun hung up on him.

It was then when Kai realized that he had lost Sehun. For good. And it was fair. When he went to see Sehun for his graduation, he had seen nothing but contempt in Sehun’s eyes. It was as though Sehun wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

Slamming the phone against a wall, Kai stormed out of the house, grabbing the car keys. As he rushed past his father and brothers on the porch, his father asked, _“Where are you going?”_

Kai gripped his jaw and spat, _“Home.”_

For a moment, he thought that his father would not try and stop him. But then the man caught his arm. _“Kai, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”_

That did it. Kai was spinning around with a cocked fist before he even knew what he was doing. His father staggered a few steps as he drove the fist through the man’s face, breaking his nose.

He groaned as blood trickled down his lips but did not retaliate. Not even when Kai burst into his wolf form and pounced on him, clawing him repeatedly on the face and neck before Yixing and Jaehyun vaulted off the porch, transforming into their beast forms. But his father took the hit. All of it without fighting back.

Because he, too, felt the guilt.

Growling, the black and brown wolves barrelled at Kai, shoving him off of their father. Kai quickly gathered himself back and shot at Yixing first, jaw instantly latching around the black wolf’s neck. _Brothers! Brothers! Pack! Family!_ He heard Yixing’s calling. All that he saw in that moment was an angry flash of red. He almost sank his teeth into his brother’s flesh before Jaehyun pounced on him, baring his teeth. Kai countered with a vicious hit to the brown wolf’s face before he pinned Jaehyun to the ground.

_“Kai!”_

He halted with his teeth one inch away from sinking into Jaehyun’s neck. He looked up at his mother on the porch.

Huffing hard, he clambered off Jaehyun while his mother hurried to his father to help him stand up. _“Oh, God,”_ she cried, lifting a hand to her husband’s bleeding face.

 _“It’s okay, I’m all right,”_ Geun panted, coughing as Hana helped him up the porch steps.

Jaehyun and Yixing snarled at Kai before they turned toward the house and shifted back to their human forms.

* * *

The afternoon sun spilled into the treehouse, bright and warm, and glistened against Sehun’s bare, pale skin that was not covered by the blankets he had been insisting on being wrapped tightly around them. Perhaps it was something that Omegas did. Kai did not know for certain. But it was adorable.

He did not want to leave. In fact, he wished that he could stay here forever, reliving last night. Sehun slept soundly, even after hearing everything that Kai had told him. He had tried to leave earlier when he received the call from his friend about Mrs. Bianchi and the other Aequuses. But realizing that he could barely walk, he conceded defeat and decided to wait until he had healed completely.

Kai brushed a lock of hair out of Sehun’s face and drew his fingers to the bitemark on Sehun’s neck. His chest was filled with pride. His soul felt complete. He was whole for the first time in his life. Sehun twitched and winced when Kai’s fingers lightly skimmed the wound.

They had mated. And it had not been part of the plan.

Kai had wanted to convince Sehun to stay out of it all. But when he realized that Sehun was determined to fight the Regnandis, he could not afford to have Sehun put in danger, especially by those Rexits, who at the end of the day, also only cared for themselves and their own agenda. The only way Aequuses would ever be taken seriously was that if they stood on their own for once and did not bow their heads to the other echelons. They might not have much ascendancy, but with they were many. If only they joined hands and revolted in unison, they could make differences that no other echelon could. Especially if they had allies in both the Rexits and the Regnandis.

Kai did not wish to harm anyone, but collateral damages do happen in attempts to achieve the greater good.

His father might have been rash, but he did it the right way. Kai knew he’d fail if he followed the same path. So, he chose to take the way that was wrong but effective.

Perhaps staying a wolf for nearly three years had destroyed a part of his humanity for good. But Sehun… Sehun knew how to bring it all back.

Sehun alone.

He leaned in to brush a kiss on Sehun’s shoulder before he sat up and gathered his clothes.

As he wended his way home, he thought about last night. His entire body was still quaking from the indescribable fulfilment he had achieved. Sex had always been so tepid for him. His body liked what was being done to it, but there was nothing else. No point. No meaning. But last night… it had been unbelievable.

When he wandered into the house, he headed upstairs to take a quick shower before anyone could smell Sehun’s scent on him.

Stepping out of the bathroom with only a towel wrapped around his waist, he found Noah perched on his bed, head turning to look at Kai, who started for the closet.

“Kai,” Noah called in a low, timid voice. Kai did not respond as he ran a hand through his damp hair, looking for a shirt. “Where… were you last night?”

Kai turned to face him then. “Why?”

Noah shrugged a little and lowered his head again. “Just asking.” He rose from the bed and crossed the room, stopping less than a foot before Kai.

Looking up at the Alpha, Noah brought a hand to Kai’s abdomen. His hand was warm against Kai’s damp skin.

“I just missed you that’s all,” Noah whispered, eyebrows furrowing as he leaned in and rested his head against Kai’s chest, walking his hand down Kai’s stomach before hooking his fingers around the towel.

Kai caught his hand, exhaling a rough breath. “We should head down. Your brother would be wondering where I am.”

Noah pulled back, frowning. “Oh… Okay,” he let out.


	34. Chapter 34

The sun had gone down when he was awakened by the heavy footfalls thudding against the floorboards of the treehouse. He forced his eyes open just enough to look up at Taeyong, who was frowning down at him.

“This is what you’ve been doing all day?” asked Taeyong gruffly. “Sleeping? In here?”

Sehun clenched his eyes again as his head swam. So many parts of his body ached in ways he did not even know they could. Especially his neck. For a moment, he tried to recollect memories that might explain why he was in such pain.

And then it all came back to him.

Eyes fluttering open, he raised his head and glanced to the other side of the mattress. His heart sank when he found it empty.

Kai was gone…

The bitemark on his neck and the soreness between his legs reassured him that everything that had happened the night before was not a dream. Unfortunately, neither was everything that happened after.

The revelations.

The truths.

The lies.

“Sehun,” called Taeyong. “Why are you… naked?”

Sitting up, Sehun winced and exhaled heavily, running a hand through his hair. “What are you… doing here?” He gathered the blankets closer to his chest and looked up at his distressed friend.

“What am I doing here? I was worried about you, goddammit. After what happened to Mrs. Bianchi and the others.”

Sehun took a few deep breaths, carefully rubbing the side of his neck where Kai had marked him. Taeyong blinked at it.

“Wait,” he said. “Did you… Are you…” he trailed off, eyes ballooning at Sehun. “You’re…”

“Yes, Taeyong. I am. I totally am,” Sehun spat, eyebrows furrowed into a scowl. “And I can’t bloody believe it.”

As he planted his throbbing head in his hands, Taeyong silently gawked at him before he plumped on the mattress beside Sehun.

Part of Sehun wanted to shoo his friend away from his nest. The nest where he and Kai had mated. This space belonged to only them now. No outsiders were welcome.

With an agitated look, Sehun frowned at Taeyong who put a hand on his shoulder.

“It’s… Kai, right?” he asked.

Sehun gave a slow nod of his head. “It was stupid…”

“Why?”

Sehun turned his gaze away then, glowering. “I knew it was stupid, and I did, anyway. Because… I had hoped… that it would change everything.”

“And?”

“It didn’t,” he let out. “Actually… it did. But everything is just so much _worse_ now.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know who or what to believe. I thought I was doing the right thing, going on the right track. But now I… I’m not sure. I don’t even know if I can believe him. The guy who… abandoned me after making me so many promises and returned with someone else that he wishes to marry. His entire family lied to me for so many years. And I’m not sure if I can even… blame him for it all anymore.”

He buried his face in his hands and tried to swallow back the tears that began to brim in his eyes.

“I feel like a fool. A clueless fool that he and his family were probably laughing about.”

“Sehun,” sighed Taeyong. “Don’t say that.”

“But it’s the truth, isn’t it? It’s not self-pity, but that’s what I must have seemed like to everybody. To the Rexits, to the Regnandis. A pathetic little foolish and insignificant Aequus who thought he could make a difference and prove something of himself. You know what’s the worst thing of it all is? I’m _always_ wrong.”

“I was wrong about the Rexits. I was wrong about the Regnandis. I was wrong about the Rexits having killed my parents. I was wrong about…” He choked on his words then. “this… I thought… it would change things between me and him. But you know what he said? He’s going to marry Noah nevertheless. Then… why? Why push me around like this?”

Taeyong exhaled heavily. “Maybe he can’t help it.”

Sehun let a tear drop down his face. “He can’t… But neither can I. I’m… tired, Taeyong. So tired. I don’t know what’s right or what’s wrong. I feel like everything I knew about the Rexits and the Regnandis was either incredibly naïve or wrong.”

“Then maybe it’s time you stepped away from it all,” said Taeyong. “Look. I have never been in your shoes. I don’t know much about all this wolf business. But I know it’s time you had your break.”

“I want to help my kind,” he whispered. “I want us to matter so that… none of us would get left behind… like I was because we’re not… one of them.” He blinked the tears in his eyes away, recalling the day that he had stood on the dirt road, begging Kai and his family to not leave him behind.

“ _No_ ,” Sehun said. His throat burned. His heart was about to give in. “I go wherever you go,” he whispered, tears blurring his vision. “ _I go… wherever… you... go_.”

Kai stared at him with his own tears in his eyes. Then he shook his head. “ _You can’t. They won’t let you… You’re not one… of us_.”

“ _Stay_ ,” Sehun begged. “ _I will die_.”

Kai’s hands flew up to the sides of Sehun’s head before he kissed Sehun desperately. “ _I love you. I love you, Sehun. I will come back for you._ ”

“ _You can’t leave me_ ,” Sehun rasped, hands clinging to Kai’s shirt as he dropped Mr. Giraffe to the ground. “ _Please. Don’t. Please. Take me with you_.”

“ _I can’t_ ,” Kai wept. He pulled away then.

He closed his eyes as the pain that tightened in his chest.

“Sehun?” muttered Taeyong. “Are you all right?”

Sehun shook his heavy head. “I feel sick.” He faced Taeyong with bloodshot eyes and bile rising in his throat. “How is… Mrs. Bianchi and the others?”

“They’re… shaken up. But not as much as you are probably.” He frowned.

“I’m sorry. I should have gone to see them… but I really couldn’t.”

“It’s okay. I’m sure they’d understand.”

Sehun’s eyes narrowed. “Taeyong… No one can know about this.”

“Who am I going to tell?” he scoffed.

“I’m serious. Don’t even tell Sara.”

Taeyong nodded his head. “So… Kai really told you that he is still going to marry that redhead?”

Sehun did not want to be reminded of it, even though it had never really left his thoughts. That was the truth, wasn’t it? No matter how hard he tried, he and Kai were from two different worlds, and Sehun would never be one of them.

Taeyong was right. It was about time he had caught a break. He was broken and exhausted from having grieved over Kai and his family since he was young.

Kai had told him to not to side with the Rexits and fight the Regnandis diplomatically on his own. But in order to do that, Sehun would have to gain the trust of the other Aequuses. And after what had happened last night, they would only fear the Regnandis more.

“He has his mind set on something,” Sehun said. “I don’t really get the full picture, but I’m not… his priority. That much I can understand. And I see no point… in clinging onto a hopeless love.”

Taeyong rubbed his temples. “This guy keeps fucking you up over and over. If Sara were here, you know what she’d say?”

Sehun knew what she would say. He knew what any rational, reasonable person would say about this whole thing. That he was pathetic. He was trying to be someone in a conflict he did not even matter in.

“There really is nothing I can do,” he said at length. “But give up and admit that… my kind and I… are better off being worthless to the wolves.”

* * *

Once he could walk without a limp again, he washed himself and pulled on a turtlenecked sweater before he headed out to make his way to Mrs. Bianchi’s the next morning.

She opened the door with a bandage around her arm.

Sehun’s stomach clenched at once. “Mrs. Bianchi,” he exhaled shakily.

She looked at him worriedly. “God, you are all right. I tried calling you a few times. Come in.”

As Sehun sauntered into her house, she ushered him to the living room where she offered him a seat. “How are you? How are the others?”

“We’re fine, Sehun.” She sounded a little out of breath. “It takes more than just a little ambush by two little pups to terrify me.”

Sehun smiled thinly and ran a gentle hand over her wounded arm. “It looks bad.”

“It isn’t. Don’t worry.”

“I’m so sorry, Mrs. Bianchi. This was all my fault.”

She sighed and cupped a side of his cheek. “Now, you hush, son. You would not have put us in danger if you had known.”

Sehun’s heart ached. This was not fair. None of this was. He was hurt. As much as he wanted to forget about what had happened the other night, he could not. The treehouse back home still smelled of Kai. The bitemark on his neck still stung. His insides felt raw and tender. He could still taste the heat of Kai’s lips on his own.

After all that, how could Kai just leave and go back to Noah?

It was not fair.

When it was all over, where would they be? How broken would they still be?

Every moment that passed since he woke up without Kai was eating away at his soul little by little. He felt lonely, he felt like he was drowning without Kai’s scent. It was as though he had gotten addicted to a drug he could not live without. And every minute he was away from Kai agitated him more and more that he was worried that he would barge over to the Regnandis’ house at the end of the street and demand his mate back.

But he did not have the right. Noah did. Noah had the right to call Kai his mate. While Sehun was just Kai’s dirty little secret.

It was _not_ fair.

He dropped his head on Mrs. Bianchi’s lap and broke into a sob that had been suffocating him since yesterday.

“ _Oh Dio_ ,” breathed out Mrs. Bianchi as she gently carded her fingers through his hair. “Sehun, I told you. It is not your fault. None of us knew. And the others… well, they are taking you more seriously now.”

Sehun raised his head to look at her with tears blurring his vision. “What do you mean?”

“We are furious,” she spat. “Who do they think they are? We are ready to listen to you, _Mimmo_. If the Regnandis think that they can just bully us into subjugation, they are wrong. This is also our home. And we want to protect it for us, our kids and our grandchildren. You have good in your heart. More of us will stand by you if you are willing to make a change around here.”

Sehun wiped his cheeks. “That’s… I can’t believe it. I don’t want anyone to be put in danger again.”

“I know. We have to be very careful. This was only a warning from the Regnandis. They will keep a close eye on us.”

“The Regnandis will always try to scare us. And if we don’t budge, they’d go to worse extents.”

“You said the Rexits will help us.”

Sehun shook his head, lowering his gaze. “I am no longer sure if they would.”

“What?”

“The Regnandis would attack us if we sided with the Rexits. And the Rexits can only protect us so much. We’re not shifters like them. But we have been around as long as they have. We deserve a peaceful home. We should… be more passive.”

“Hmm. What is it that you suggest now, Sehun?”

“We take a neutral stand. We do not kneel to Regnandis or the Rexits. We’re our own people. If we stand together, we could matter more. But I’m not sure if we should fight their fight anymore.”

“This isn’t cold feet from what happened the other night, is it?” she asked, frowning.

Sehun sighed. “I don’t want anyone hurt. And the Regnandis will hurt whoever that meddles. I know now.”

“All right. So, what will _you_ do? With the Rexits?”

Sehun sniffled. “I am going to step aside.”

“Are you sure that… Kali will be okay with that?”

Sehun blinked then. “He won’t force me.”

“No. But he might think of you as a traitor.”

“Well, what’s one more…”

* * *

He returned to his treehouse later that day and changed the sheets on the mattress, washed the blankets and brought some of his old toys, baby clothes, and blankets he had found stashed away in the closet. Anything he could find of his to stuff the treehouse with to make it more intimate. This was _his_ nest.

Kneeling on a side of the mattress, he spread out the blankets on it before he glanced over to the shattered locket on the floor. For a moment, he stared at the broken fragments with a lump in his throat as his breathing quickened.

He then picked the pieces of the locket up and held them to his chest.

He was not Kai’s first. And Kai believed that Sehun was not his.

But they should have been each other’s first a very long time ago.

He found an old film canister and stored the fragments of the locket in it before safely putting it away. Then he placed Mr. Giraffe on one corner of the mattress before he lay in it, hugging the blankets around his body. He regretted washing them. He missed Kai’s scent.

Was Kai even thinking about him? Was he suffering from the same longing and loneliness Sehun was?

Sehun wished he were here. With him. Right now. Cocooned in the blankets.

* * *

He stood outside on the sidewalk early in the morning, staring in the way of the house at the end of the street. It would be nice if he could at least see Kai once today. He hugged his arms around his shivering body as the morning chilliness stroked against his skin.

He waited for a few hours, seated on the sidewalk. Kai never came out.

Maybe he had forgotten about that night after all. Maybe it had not meant all that much to him.

He was there, Sehun knew it. He was there, only a few blocks away. A few strides would get him to his mate in a moment. But he could not go there. He did not belong there. Besides, he did not want Kai to get into trouble. Not to mention that Sehun would be the one to be killed first if the _Princeps_ found out about what he and Kai had done…

He wrapped his arms around his legs and dropped his face between his knees.

He had never felt so lonely and despaired. Was this what mating entailed? A constant need and yearning for his Soulbinder?

If Kai felt half as much misery as Sehun did, he would have come to see him.

He felt sick.

Homesick. Terribly, awfully homesick.

He wished that he had someone in that moment. A family he could always turn to. A family who would never turn him away. A pack.

“How long are you going to be sitting here?” he heard Jaehyun’s voice before he smelled the Alpha’s scent.

His nose must be too clogged to even pick up on wolf scent. He looked up at the Regnandi who was drenched in sweat after having jogged around the neighbourhood.

Sehun dropped his head. “Leave me alone,” he mumbled.

“You were sitting here when I left on my jog,” Jaehyun scoffed.

“What do you care?” He knew Jaehyun did not. He was probably here to pick on him.

“I don’t,” spat the man. “But I’m a little curious. You also smell like you’re trying to get every male wolf in this town to mount you.”

Sehun had not noticed.

“So, I’m not really sure why you’re sitting out here in the open when my house is filled with horny ass wolves.”

“You Regnandis don’t mate with Aequuses, anyway,” Sehun pointed. “So, I don’t think you have to worry too much.”

“Yeah, we don’t _mate_ with Aequuses.” He shrugged. “We fuck them. And then we kill them. The _Princeps_ especially are very adept at it.”

Sehun could not tell if Jaehyun were joking or not. He was not ready to find out. “You all deserve to rot in the deepest part of hell.”

Jaehyun laughed. “I’m already looking forward to it.” He plugged his earbuds back into his ears and started past Sehun before he paused. “You know why I never liked you?”

Sehun tiredly looked up at him again. “Because you’re an asshole?”

“Well, yeah. That. Definitely. But also, you bug me.”

Sehun arched an eyebrow. “That’s it?”

Jaehyun took a deep breath, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re an Aequus male Omega. You literally check all the boxes of a weak non-shifter. Yet… you somehow believed that you would be a part of _our_ pack.”

“Is there more to that?”

Jaehyun shrugged. “No. Just trying to make you feel even worse.”

Sehun let out a heavy breath. “Okay.” He dropped his face back onto his knees.

Jaehyun was not walking away. Sehun raised his head again to frown at the Regnandi.

“You got something more to say?” he asked softly.

Jaehyun scowled now. He looked annoyed. “Why are you so… persistent?” he spat then.

Sehun blinked. “Jaehyun, I… really don’t have the energy to pick a fight with you. It’s been a long week. And I’m sorry that I… bug you. I didn’t mean to. I always liked you.”

“Not as much as you liked Kai,” scoffed Jaehyun.

Sehun stared at him silently then.

Shaking his head and sighing, Jaehyun spun around and jogged back to his house.

* * *

“Hey?” called Baz, waving a hand when Sehun did not respond to his question. “Are you all right?”

Sehun nodded his head slowly, pushing the cheesy fries away. He could not find the appetite to stomach anything but sorrow. He did not want to go back to his empty, cold nest again tonight.

He wondered if he should go over to Kali’s manor to tell the Alpha that he would no longer help him build an alliance with the Aequus.

“Something on your mind?” asked Baz.

“Nothing,” lied Sehun.

“Okay… There is something I wanted to talk to you about, though.”

Sehun looked up at the spectacled boy. “What is it?”

“It’s about, um… I don’t know anyone else I can really talk to this about.” His olive skin did not need flush red for Sehun to see that Baz was blushing. He lowered his head and gnawed at his lip, hands fidgeting with the ketchup bottles. “Yixing.”

“What about him?”

“I… I don’t know. I might be completely wrong but… I don’t know. He’s… He’s very nice.”

“Well, you’re not wrong about that.”

“No, no. That’s not what I was referring to,” he stuttered and rambled, scratching the back of his head. “I just mean… He’s been coming around a lot. And we talk.”

“You like him?”

Baz looked up at him in horror. “God, no,” he rasped. “Well, yeah, I mean… Not like that. I… Maybe.” He sighed.

Sehun frowned. “Has he… noticed?”

“That’s the thing. I think he’s giving me hints but I’m not sure. He’s a father. He has a child. I don’t know what to think.”

“Baz, I know them. I know him. I know his family. Trust me. You want no part of this.” He drained the glass of water.

Baz’s face wilted. “Oh…” He was quiet for a moment. “I was not… going to make a move or anything. I just… wanted to…” he trailed off, flustered. “I should get back to work.”

With that, he hurried away to a booth.

It had started to rain when Sehun left the diner later that night. And it did not stop even as he reached home.

He had no heart to go inside and take cover. Instead, he walked up to the dirt road and stood in the rain, staring at the Regnandis’ house as the rainwater bathed him.

He knew the wolves would not be able to smell him in the rain. And he certainly was not able to smell them. He wished he were brave enough to knock on the door. He was. He did not mind putting himself in danger. But he did not want to give Kai any trouble.

He felt lonely. He wished that he had never mated. Now, it felt as though a part of him had gone missing.


	35. Chapter 35

He stopped just outside the manor as his nose was stung by a blend of wolf scent. Betas. He glanced at the trees surrounding the manor. His breathing slowly shallowed as his eyes darted to the snarling wolves that hid in the shadows of the copses.

Sucking in a breath, he rang the doorbell and waited nervously until the door was pried open. He looked up at Kali, whose stony eyes met his own.

“Kali,” Sehun let out shakily.

For a moment, Kali stared at him before he exhaled heavily and let Sehun in. “You had gone missing for a while.”

It had been a few days. Sehun had lost count, in all honesty. Some days were even forgotten as he had remained in his nest, nursing his forlornness.

“I heard about what happened in the town,” Kali then said, shutting the door behind him. “It was not us.”

“I know,” Sehun muttered, hugging his arms around his body. “We know. It was the Regnandis.”

Kali ran a hand through his greying hair and rubbed his beard. “They have to be stopped.”

Sehun frowned. “It was a warning.”

“And we’ll fight back.”

He lowered his head. “How? _You_ can fight back. _We_ can’t.”

Kali fell silent for a length as he mustered Sehun from head to toe. “Is something wrong?” he asked after a while.

Sehun heaved a deep breath before saying, “I came to say that… I couldn’t do it.”

Kali arched an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest. “Couldn’t do what?”

“I can’t. This. The alliance. I have thought… about it. I have been foolish to think that I could be stronger. As strong as… the others. But I am an Aequus. I’m no wolf. None of us are. And when the Rexits and Regnandis are done fighting, we’re the ones who’d be hurt.”

Kali crossed the distance between them and took hold of Sehun’s arms. “I told you, I am not going to let you or the other Aequuses be hurt.”

“We already have been, and you weren’t there,” Sehun murmured, pulling his arms free. “We don’t… want to fight your fight.”

Kali’s eyebrows furrowed into a scowl then. “So, are you going to fight theirs? The Regnandis?”

Sehun shook his head. “Look. If you want the Aequuses to side with you, find someone else to do it. I don’t think I’m cut out for this.”

“Where do you stand, then?” asked the Alpha, his jaw set tight.

Sehun swallowed hard. “I… don’t know. Nowhere. I guess.”

“And do you think that’s a good idea when a war comes? To be a coward?”

Sehun looked up at the man, eyes turning misty. “I’m not a coward,” he whispered.

Kali scoffed. “I had such high hopes for you, Sehun. I saw a fighter in you. You had a thirst for… justice.”

Sehun kept mum, head held low. He was truly tired. The hollowness in his soul and heart made it almost impossible for him to face the next day. And knowing that there was a tomorrow made today all the more tiring. The last time he had felt so hopeless was when Kai and his family had abandoned only days after his parents had died. And the feeling lasted for years.

“Perhaps I was wrong,” Kali then said. “Or perhaps you had let one of them waver your determination. I know how good they all are at manipulating. And it does not make it any easier that you are in love with one of them. I should have known. At the end of the day, you would succumb to the Regnandis.”

“I did not… succumb to them,” Sehun said, trembling. “I am saying that I don’t want to be involved in this fight. And I don’t think involving the Aequuses would be any better. Some of them are already hurt.”

Kali nodded his head and snorted. “Very well. I see that you have made up your mind. But I will have you know that if you choose not to stand against the Regnandis, you cannot count on me or my wolves to protect you as one of our own.”

“I am not one of your own. I don’t belong anywhere.”

Kali gritted his teeth and yanked the door open. “Goodbye, Sehun.”

As Sehun started for the door, he stopped to glance back at Kali. “Will you tell Jax I said hello?”

Kali kept his jaw locked as he glared Sehun down.

Stepping out of the manor, Sehun wiped a tear that betrayed his eyes. He did not like being called a coward. He was not a coward. No. He was just tired.

* * *

Two days, the loud banging on the door had Sehun jumping out of the couch. His heart started hammering against his chest. He started sniffing the air, hoping to catch a whiff of Kai’s scent.

He smelled nothing.

“Open the door before I kick it down!” he heard Sara’s voice from the other side of the door.

“Sara?” he gasped as he pulled the door open.

“I have half the mind to march over to his house and put a rock to his skull!” she yapped before Sehun threw himself onto her and hugged her, breaking into tears against her shoulder. “Sehun…” She sighed and wrapped her arms around him.

“Taeyong told you, didn’t he?” Sehun sniffled, pulling back.

Sara cupped his face and wiped the tears from his cheeks. She was frowning now, all anger drained from her expression. “Well, I sort of dragged it out of him. God, you look… terrible.”

“Terrible doesn’t start to describe it.” Sehun chuckled weakly and wiped his face with the sleeve of his sweater before welcoming Sara into the house.

“What happened?” she asked as they sank into a seat on the couch. She brought a hand to Sehun’s hung head to brush his hair out of his face. “Do you have a fever? You’re burning up.”

“I’ve felt like this ever since… he left.”

“That bastard.”

“You didn’t have to drive all the way up here, Sara.”

“Uh, yes, I had to. Besides, who else do you got?” She shook her head, gently rubbing the back of Sehun’s neck. The bitemark had healed and was starting to fade. “Did he do this?”

Sehun nodded.

“Damn. I thought I’d be happier about you getting laid.” She slumped back against the couch. “Sehun, you know, you’re depressed, right? You need help. I’m worried for you.”

Exhaling heavily, Sehun nodded again. “I know what it feels like, Sara. I’ve been through it. For years. But this… this is something else. This is something more. And it has something to do with…” he trailed off.

“With the fact that you… mated?” she asked.

Sehun was silent for a moment before he finally said, “I think so. I feel so… hollow. He just… left and never came to see me again.”

“He’s right there, Sehun. You could just walk up there and confront him.”

“I can’t. A lot has happened here, Sara. And I don’t know if things are going to get any better for me.”

Sara straightened up and took hold of his hand then, her eyes narrowed and grave. “You listen to me. We all have it tough. One way or another. But don’t you ever forget that someone, no matter how big or small, loves you in this world. You have it tough, you reach out to us. You shouldn’t close yourself off like this. I am one phone call away. Taeyong would be happy to help if you let him. Baz would too if he knew what was up. I know we can’t… be your pack. And you need a pack to feel like you belong, to feel like you’re cared for. To feel alive. But we’re still your family. And we’d be very sad if anything happened to you. Can you remember that for me? Can you promise me to come to me whenever you need me?”

Sehun dropped his face against her shoulder. “I know. I know you’ll be there when I need you to… But I need _him_.”

Sara stroked his back, sighing heavily. “God, you smell awful.”

Sehun chuckled softly. “It’s the Calor… I’m sorry I got you worried.”

* * *

It reminded Sehun of his childhood. Him, Sara and Taeyong, seated in a booth at the diner. Expect that so many things have changed.

Sara and Taeyong did not talk much. Especially Sara, who was uncharacteristically quiet. She looked upset. Worried. So worried.

Sehun wondered if she were worried that he would kill himself or something. And it felt strange to promise her that he was not planning on hurting himself. He did not think death would be any help to the misery he was going through.

“A lot has happened since the last time I was here,” Sara muttered.

“I’m sorry, Sehun,” said Taeyong. “But I had to tell her because I don’t know what’s going to happen to you.”

Sehun understood that Taeyong was only looking out for him. And so was Sara. But neither of them could really help him.

“It looks like someone died in this booth,” commented Baz when he walked up to them. “It’s almost closing time, guys.”

Sehun craned his head up to look at the diner that was almost empty.

The doorbell chimed as a group of Rexits sauntered into the diner. “We’re almost closed,” Baz shot in their way.

Sehun’s heart dropped when his gaze landed on Maza, Vergel and Jack, who were followed by three other Rexits.

“Then keep it open until we’re done eating,” Maza told Baz as she shoved past him, fixing Sehun with a sidelong glance.

Jack looked annoyed. Vergel simply stared at Sehun with a blank expression. The three other men pinned Sehun with a glare, their chests heaving as they inhaled Sehun’s scent, strutting past him.

“Do you know them?” asked Sara in a low voice as Baz anxiously wended his way to the Rexits.

Sehun bowed his head a little. “Half of them.”

“They’re the Rexits he was hanging out with for a while,” said Taeyong. “Are you no longer friends?”

“I don’t think we ever were,” sighed Sehun. “But now they might have more reasons to hate me.”

“Well, they’re not going to do anything to you,” spat Sara, glaring at the Rexits. Maza arched an eyebrow at her. Sara did not look away. “I’m here.”

Sehun smiled in spite of everything. “We should still get out of here,” he then said.

“What was your name again, you pretty pup?” asked a voice suddenly as Sehun rose from his seat. He glanced back to look at one of the three Rexits smirking at him.

“Glen, sit your ass down,” Maza growled at the Rexit who shot up to his feet.

Sehun turned for the door with his heartbeat quickening in his chest.

“Oh, hold up,” said the Rexit. Glen. “I just want to talk.”

“Leave the boy alone, Glen,” said Vergel.

“Why? Kali’s no longer protecting him.” He winked at his friends and started toward Sehun.

As Sehun raised a hand to open the door, the Rexit slammed it shut from behind. Turning around, Sehun looked up at the man with tired eyes. “What do you want?” he asked.

“Ooh. Pretty flower has thorns.” He grinned and raised a hand to stroke Sehun’s cheek with the back of his fingers. “You’re on your heat,” he whispered, leaning in closer. “Aren’t you?”

“Glen!” called Maza. “We came for waffles. Your waffles are getting cold.”

Sehun shoved the Rexit’s hand off his face and hurried out of the diner.

“Now, wait up,” said Glen as he followed Sehun out of the diner.

“Let him be,” Sara rasped at him before the Rexit spun around to bare his fangs at her. Staggered, Sara paused in her tracks.

The night was as quiet as always in Oakenbury. Almost deserted.

Sehun should have stayed home, safe in his treehouse.

“Come on. Let’s talk,” said the Rexit as he caught Sehun’s arm and pulled him to a stop.

“Let go,” Sehun grunted, trying to wrench his arm free.

The Rexit’s laboured breathing grew heavier by the second. His dark eyes turned golden as he began to snarl.

“Should we call the cops or something?” asked Baz as he walked out of the diner and found Sehun struggling to break free from the man’s grip.

That was when the sound of tyres screeching against gravel averted Sehun’s attention as the sleek black car pulled toward the diner before jerking to an abrupt stop.

His knees almost buckled when he saw the car’s door open before Kai stepped out with his hands fisted at his sides, a vicious scowl etched on his flaring red wolf eyes. He was panting fiercely as he stomped over to the Rexit and grabbed the wrist of his hand that was clamped around Sehun’s arm. Yanking the hand off Sehun, Kai shoved the Rexit back by the chest and put himself between them.

Maza, Jack, Vergel and the other two Rexits stormed out of the diner at once and took their standing behind Glen.

“You’re going to turn around and walk away before I rip every last one of your heads off,” Kai threatened them in a low growl.

“Glen,” called Jack, his eyes boring a hole into Kai. “Let’s not do this right now.”

Clenching his jaw and grinding his teeth, Glen turned around after pinning Kai with a hard glare.

Sehun raised a shaky hand to Kai’s arm and held onto it. It was all that he could to not to pass out right now. Kai’s scent both overwhelmed and calmed him at the same time.

He felt threatened and secured concurrently.

As though he were drowning and breathing all at once.

As the Rexits retreated, Kai slowly turned around to face Sehun, whose breaths were short and exhausted.

“Are you all right?” Kai asked, even though he had already known the answer.

Peeling the leather jacket off, he draped it over Sehun’s shoulders and curled an arm around Sehun’s waist as Sehun leaned heavily against him.

“I’m going to take him home,” he heard Kai say to Sara and the others, who did not voice an objection.

As Sehun took a step forward, the world spun around him. He held tightly onto Kai’s arm before his knees turned to water and his head to mush. Kai took hold of him before he could collapse onto the ground as he blacked out.

* * *

He woke to a familiar ceiling and a cacophony of scents that attacked his senses without mercy. _alpha!alpha!alpha!_

And so many of them.

He sat up gasping and glanced around the dark room.

The door opened, and someone stepped in. Sehun felt his heart pound against his ribs as blood pulsed in his temples.

“Sehun?” a familiar voice called his name. Yixing.

His scent was overpowering. Sehun moaned and choked on a sob. “Yixing?” he called in a whimper, reaching a hand out. Yixing caught it.

“You okay?”

“Where’s Kai? Where am… I?” he asked, panting.

“You’re at our house. It’s okay.”

Sehun wanted to climb Yixing and hold onto him. Then someone else entered the room.

“Don, he’s up,” said Yixing, sounding like he was holding his breath.

“I can see that,” said the other man as he flickered the bedside lamp on. Sehun squinted at the sudden brightness, his hand tightening around Yixing’s. “How are you feeling, Sehun? You had passed out when Kai brought you home.”

Sehun was confused as Chanri’s husband caught his wrist and checked his pulse. He panted and sniffed Don. He smelled good. But Sehun was even more nervous. He released Yixing’s hand and drew the duvet up to his chest.

“Where is Kai?” he asked again.

“Relax,” said Yixing. “We’re not going to… do anything that’s troubling your mind.”

Don smirked. “Yes, I’m a married man.” He straightened up. “But it seems like your sickness can only be solved by—”

“What are you two doing here?” Sehun’s heart skipped a beat as soon as he heard Kai’s voice. He frantically looked to the door through which Kai strutted in, wearing a furious expression. “Get out.”

Don and Yixing rolled their eyes as they made their way out of the room. “Let him rest,” Don told Kai. “But… stay with him.”

“And tell everyone to stay away. This room is off-limits,” Kai growled at his brother-in-law.

As soon as Don and Yixing were out, he slammed  the door shut and locked it before he glanced to Sehun, who was gawking at him with tears in his eyes.

“The _Princeps_ ,” Sehun let out.

“They’re gone.”

Kai stood still for a moment as he stared at Sehun, eyebrows drawn together. Sehun could not tell if he looked sad or angry. Perhaps a bit of both.

Sehun lowered his gaze as his breathing slowly calmed. “And Noah?”

“He’s… downstairs,” Kai muttered as he finally moved to stand at a side of the bed. “You want some water?”

Sehun nodded his head shyly as Kai took a seat on the edge of the bed and poured him some water from the jug on the bedside table. Grabbing hold of the cup with both hands, Sehun sipped the water little by little to soothe his parched throat.

“Are you cold?” Kai asked.

Sehun shook his head. In fact, he was hot. His body was burning. He wanted to get rid of every article of clothing he was wearing.

Kai was quiet for a stretch as he stared at the floor with a lockjaw. Then turning his head a little toward Sehun, he said, “You’re not leaving this room until you’re off your Calor. Do you understand?”

Sehun blinked. “You… left,” he whispered.

Kai’s gaze rose to meet Sehun’s then. “I had to.” He frowned.

“Why am I here?”

“Because you’re not safe anywhere else.”

“I have been safe for years.”

“You must be getting a little careless then, waltzing around Rexits while you’re on heat,” Kai spat exasperatedly then, scowling at Sehun.

Sehun lowered his gaze. He wanted to touch Kai, wrap his arms around the man and stay that way forever. But another part of him wanted to slap the living daylights out of the Alpha.


	36. Chapter 36

Lowering the cup to his lap, Sehun kept his eyes low as his breaths came out short and laboured. “You disappear after…” he trailed off for a moment, mouth feeling dry. “You just say you had to… And then you show up out of nowhere… Now, you’re keeping me captive here because you think that’s safe for me. So… is it always going to be you who gets to decide whether I’m in your life or not?”

Kai fell quiet, his face twisting with a sour expression, as though he had been stung.

Sehun sniffled and settled the cup of water on the bedside table. Then fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, he bit back on a sob. “I know not to expect… anything from you, Kai. I learned that many years ago. But I thought… things would change after we’ve… I suppose not. Was it even… real for you? Or… did you just do it to get into my head? Because if that was your goal, you have succeeded. All that I can think about is… wanting you. And I hate that. You always get to… make the choice.”

“You made the choice,” Kai spat then without raising his head to look up at Sehun. “Remember? When I stood on your doorstep that night?”

Sehun felt his heart pound in that moment.

“You told me to leave. You had moved on. While I… I was just…” Kai planted his head in his hands then, huffing heavily. “You know it was real for me,” he said at length through his gritted teeth. “You think this isn’t hard for me?”

“It’s harder for me,” Sehun argued weakly. He was not sure what had his head spinning, but he suspected the cause to be Kai’s scent and presence. “You left me alone all those years ago with a family, with a pack. You left me after that night to go back to your pack. I know I’m not your responsibility, and I’m not your pack. But I do wonder if… we’ll ever be one.”

Kai exhaled heavily. “Sehun, I told you… I can’t right now. I have too much going on.”

“Then why do you even bother coming back at all?”

He sounded enraged when he spoke again. “You never listened when I told you not to meddle with those Rexits. Tonight, one of them almost—”

“Kai, please… don’t.” This was not what he had wanted them to talk about when he saw Kai again. “I don’t want to… talk about that. I meant… why do you pull me and then push me away?”

“What do you want me to do?” The way he asked the question hurt Sehun, like a knife to the heart.

He could not believe that he was hearing that. What did he want Kai to do? Frankly, he did not know. There was a part of him that selfishly longed for Kai to leave everything behind and stay with him. But that would mean Kai would have to become a Rexit. And he would put everyone he loved in agony, including Sehun. He knew what he wanted, after all. He just could not ask for it.

He lied down and buried a side of his face in the pillow, back facing Kai. “Right now, I want you to leave me alone,” he whispered miserably. It was a lie. He wanted Kai to stay and hold him and never let him go. He wanted his body to stop shivering and feeling like it was being hurled into a whirlpool.

The sheets and the pillow and everything in the room smelled like Kai. It calmed Sehun down a little.

“Sehun,” he heard Kai call in a soft, remorseful voice before he felt the Alpha’s hand that diffidently touched a side of his waist. Kai quickly retrieved it when he felt Sehun shudder and flinch away. He sat still on the bed for a long moment, his breathing loud and steady as he stared at Sehun.

After a while, his weight shifted on the bed as he rose from it and turned the bedside lamp off. Drawing the blanket over Sehun, Kai then wended his way out of the bedroom and closed the door behind him.

Once he was gone, Sehun hugged the blanket closer to his face and nuzzled into it as he quietly began to cry, tears seeping through the pillow.

* * *

He did not know if Kai or anyone else ever came back to the room to check on him for the rest of the night. But when he woke again, it was morning. The sunlight was pouring through the slits of the curtains.

Sitting up, Sehun scrubbed his face with his hands and squinted at the brightness of the room. He could not remember when he was here the last time. But sweet, beautiful memories came rushing back to him.

He leaned against the headboard and thought about the days he and Kai used to sit on the bed and play video games. Kai would let him win most of the time. Sometimes, Sehun cheated and then rubbed his victory in Kai’s face. Other times, he’d call Kai a cheater when he lost.

Growing up, Kai had always been the poster boy for a perfect child. The son every mother wanted. The student every teacher wished they could mentor. Sehun thought that he hated that about Kai because he was impossible to be bested in any arena. Sehun had envied him and even though he would never admit it, he _admired_ Kai. His mother sometimes said that Kai was brought up really well. For a wolf. He was one of the good ones.

Right now, though, Sehun was no longer sure. It almost felt like he knew nothing about Kai anymore.

He then recalled the time Kai was lying in this room, hurt and recovering, after he had so bravely fought off wolves to protect Sehun. He had been tiny then. He was no match for even one fully-grown wolf, let alone two. But he had protected Sehun that day, risking his own life. That was how much he liked Sehun. And if it hadn’t been for Geun, Kai would have died that day. He did not care. All that he wanted was for Sehun to be safe.

He put Sehun’s safety above his own life.

Perhaps it was unfair of Sehun to demand him of things that he could not give. And maybe… it would not be so bad to settle for something that he could get from Kai.

He thought about what Kai had said last night. Years ago, he did stand on Sehun’s doorstep, angry and heartbroken. What Sehun had done to him that night had cost them a great deal. In a way, it had been Sehun’s fault that Geun was no longer around.

He doubted that Kai knew that he had not moved on. That night had been a series of misunderstandings that led them down the most dreadful paths.

He rose from the bed and headed for the door. With his hand raised to the doorknob, he paused in his tracks when he heard a cacophony of faint voices coming from downstairs.

Sucking in a deep breath, Sehun exited the room and meandered his way down. When was the last time he was welcome in this house, he wondered.

He stopped at the bottom of the staircase when he smelled something wonderful that wafted out of the kitchen. It was then when he realized he was starving. He had not had much of an appetite for the past few days. But this smelled like something he could eat in heaps.

With his heart in his throat, he started for the kitchen.

He remembered all those times he had found Hana in the kitchen, making food with so much love and kindness in her eyes. He had missed it. He definitely missed seeing Geun strut into the kitchen to give his wife a peck on the head while Yixing and Jaehyun argued something stupid by the counter.

“Good morning, Sehun,” said Hana without looking back as she piled some salads on a plate along with slices of freshly baked cornbread drizzled with honey.

Sehun stood still and breathed shakily.

“Did you sleep well?” she inquired, turning around to face Sehun with a gentle smile.

Sehun swallowed hard, lowering his head.

“I hope you are feeling better. I know it must be hard.” She placed the plate on the table and pulled out a chair. She then waited for Sehun. “I also made some pomegranate juice. It will help with the heat.”

Sehun sat down in spite of not wanting to. He could never say no to Hana. “How did you… know?” he asked, staring at the plate of breakfast. His mouth watered a little.

“Noah goes through his Calor from time to time. We’ve learned that there are only handful of foods he can stomach. We have an Omega in a pack of Alphas for the first time.”

She handed him a glass of ruby-red drink. It was good. The sourness made it all the better.

“Eat up.”

As she turned away, Sehun started eating. Everything on his plate tasted like heaven, even though it was nothing special. Perhaps it was a little special. It had been a long time since Sehun had eaten Hana’s food. And to think that Noah was pampered, looked after, cared for during his Calor by Hana had Sehun drowning in a bit of jealousy.

He wondered if Kai looked after Noah during his Calor. That seemed fair, didn’t it? Kai was his betrothed after all.

“Ah, you’re awake.”

Sehun jumped in his seat with his mouth stuffed when Don sauntered into the kitchen, smelling like the forest, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.

Grabbing a grape from the counter, Don walked over to the table and pulled up a chair next to Sehun. “How do you feel?” he asked, taking hold of Sehun’s hand.

Sehun immediately yanked his hand back and scowled at the man, munching aggressively. Don chuckled and shook his head.

“Just trying to take your pulse,” he said.

Sehun made a face but did not object when Don grabbed his wrist and pressed two of his fingers to the inside of it.

“You should fill up,” he sighed, rising from his seat. “Food is the best medicine in the world. Especially _her_ food.” He turned to Hana with a wide grin and kissed his mother-in-law’s temple.

“You flatter me too much, Don,” said Hana.

Sehun wiped his mouth and stood up. “Thank you,” he muttered quietly. “I should go.”

“I don’t think Kai will be too happy about that,” said Don. “He’s just outside, guarding the area like a madman.”

“We cannot keep him here if he doesn’t want to stay,” Hana told Don before she glanced to Sehun. “But you are welcome to stay, Sehun.”

“I’m not really sure I am,” Sehun mumbled. “Besides, I can take care of myself. I don’t want to burden anyone.”

Hana nodded her head. “I can understand. And you have no reason to trust us.”

Don exhaled heavily. “All right. I gotta get ready for work. Just ring me up if you need anything, okay? Or just pop into the hospital.” he told Sehun and gave him a pat on the shoulder before he walked away.

“He’s a good one,” remarked Hana as she turned to do the dishes.

Sehun gnawed at his lower lip before saying, “Is Chanri… really happy with him?”

“She is,” was Hana’s blunt answer.

Sehun did not want to believe her. If he believed that Chanri could be happy with Don, then there was a chance that Kai would be happy with someone other than his Soulbinder.

He turned on his heel to leave but stopped to look back at Hana.

“If you knew… all along that he and I can’t be together, why did you… let us get so close?” he asked her, tears stinging his eyes. “You could have stopped us.”

Hana froze for a minute. She then met Sehun’s gaze. “I wish I had,” she said. “But we could not. He loves you, Sehun. He loved you before, and he loves you now. He’s just… grown up now. He knows what’s important.”

“And I’m not… important to him.”

She looked away. “That’s where you’re wrong. You’re the most important to him. And… I know one day I would lose him because of that. I wish I could beg you to not to take my son away but I’m sure you’ll have your own loss to deal with.”

Sehun understood none of that. And he did not want to know what it meant.

“Everyone always tells me how much he loves me,” he said, trembling. “Nobody ever thinks of the fact that I love him even more.”

“I doubt it.” She smiled at him. It was not an insult. And what she said did not hurt Sehun in any way. “But he’s the only one you have left. I know how much he means to you.”

Sehun clenched his hands at his sides. “I’m sorry about Geun, Hana. I know… it was my fault.”

“I never blamed you, Sehun.” She sighed and leaned against the counter. “But he cared about you, you know? Kai never understood that. He always thought his father was the bad guy for keeping you two away from each other.”

“I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s not your fault. Don’t ever think that.” The way she looked at him then made him realize that she really did not blame him.

He turned around and walked out of the kitchen with a sob bubbling in his chest. He stopped in the living room when he found Jeni and Noah seated on the couch.

Their heads turned to Sehun instantly. He still could not believe how big Jeni was now. She smiled at him fondly. He was not sure how much of him Jeni even remembered.

“You okay?” she asked in a loving voice. “Heard you had quite a scare last night. Passing out and all.”

Sehun rubbed the back of his neck. “I…” he trailed off, glancing toward the front door when he heard Yixing and Chanri’s voices.

“You’re not leaving, are you?” asked Jeni.

Licking his lips, Sehun said, “I probably… should.”

Noah was not saying anything. In fact, he had looked away, eyebrows furrowed into a scowl.

“I know some people don’t want me here,” he said, staring at Noah, who sharply turned to him then, his green eyes glaring as bright as his red hair.

He shot up from the couch and walked up to Sehun. “Yeah, you’re absolutely right.”

“You’re not going to snitch to your brother about my being here?” Sehun asked, deliberately wanting to provoke the boy.

“I could,” spat Noah. “But I won’t.”

“Guys,” Jeni groaned.

“Not for you,” Noah said, prodding a finger into Sehun’s chest. “But for him.”

With that, he shoved past Sehun and left the room.

“Sorry,” said Jeni, rising to her full height. “I know he can be a bit of a pill. But in _his_ defence, the man he’s in love with is in love with _you_ , which makes you the bitter rival.”

“I don’t want to be his rival,” Sehun muttered.

Jeni smiled. “I know you, Sehun. I’ve known you since I was like a baby. You don’t like to be challenged. And you love to win.”

“I have changed, Jeni. In ways you don’t know.”

“Somethings don’t change.” She shrugged with a smirk and went after Noah.

Sehun closed his eyes for a second and calmed his breathing before he started for the door.

Stepping out to the porch, he glanced to Yixing, Chanri and Jaehyun, who seemed like they were engaged in a heated argument. Jaehyun looked like he was about to punch his siblings any moment now.

“You’re really pushing your luck,” spat Jaehyun. “Am I the only one who can see this ending badly for all of us?”

“He’s just a friend. A guest. That’s it,” said Yixing. “We’re looking after him. We’re doing this for Kai.”

“We’re always doing things for Kai,” Jaehyun roared. “That’s how we fucking lost our father, remember?”

“Jaehyun, will you stop?” said Chanri. “It will take a couple of days tops. He will feel better, and he can go home. The Rexits are getting out of hand. It’s not safe for him.”

“You really think I give a rat’s ass about his safety? I care about _our_ safety and _our_ pack. He _cannot_ stay in our home. This is not some Omega protection programme.”

“You don’t get a say in this,” said Yixing then. “I hate to play this card, but he’s welcome here.”

Jaehyun shoved Yixing back then. “Why don’t we take it to the woods and see who gets a say in this?”

“You’re being ridiculous,” said Chanri, yanking Jaehyun away. “We owe him this.”

“We owe him nothing. He’s a fucking Aequus, for god’s sake!”

“He’s a person,” said Yixing. “He’s important to our brother. We used to be his family, too.”

“Bullshit,” said Jaehyun. “I was never his family.”

“You’re going to let go of this pathetic grudge you have against him,” said Chanri. “It’s really getting old.”

While they argued, Sehun’s gaze flitted to a nearby tree. His heart immediately dropped to his stomach, fluttering, as his breathing quickened when he found a huge white wolf, resting under the tree, keeping an eye on the baby that was sitting on the ground, leaning against the wolf.

Nova was playing with the wolf’s paws and tail excitedly.

Kai was not bothered with anything that his siblings were arguing about, even though he could hear them all loud and clear. When Nova almost toppled to the ground, the wolf caught him with a paw and sniffed the back of the baby’s head. The baby giggled and buried his little hands into the wolf’s thick fur.

Red eyes eventually turned to the porch Sehun was standing on. They blinked gently, the wolf’s breathing hard and heavy.

“Get out of my way.”

Sehun tore his gaze away from the wolf to look up at Jaehyun who was standing less than an inch away from him, chest heaving in rage.

Sehun stopped him, lifting a hand to Jaehyun’s chest.

Jaehyun froze completely, eyes widening with confusion. For a moment, he looked dumbstruck.

“What did you mean?” Sehun asked tiredly, staring into Jaehyun’s eyes. He could feel the man’s heart thundering against his palm. “What you said the other day…”

Jaehyun gripped his jaw then. He harshly seized Sehun’s wrist and twisted it a little before shoving it away. “Two seconds,” he hissed through his teeth. “Two seconds is all that it will take me to snap your neck like a twig.”

He grabbed Sehun’s arm and pushed him aside before stomping past him.

Sehun glanced to the white wolf again. It looked alarmed now, ears twitching and eyes glowering.

As much as he knew he should leave, he wanted to stay. With Kai. For as long as he could. Maybe they still had some things to talk about. Maybe he just wanted to wrap himself up in Kai’s embrace.

He turned around and walked back into the house.

He did not stop until he was in Kai’s bedroom again. He sat on the bed for a while, hugging his arms around his body. He then glanced the photo frame on the desk. His heart skipped a beat.

He should at least clean up if he were going to stay. With a big breath, he stood up and started shrugging out of his clothes before stepping into the bathroom.

Would Kai be happy if he knew Sehun had decided not to fight with the Rexits anymore? Would he be happy if he knew Sehun had never been with anyone but him? That might probably be why this was hitting Sehun so hard. Kai was his one and only. And they had made love, mated, knotted. There was no turning back for Sehun now.

Turning the shower on, he shuddered as the warm water dripped out of the shower head and pelted against his tender skin.

He thought he heard the door of the bathroom creak open, but he did not dare turn around until he smelled Kai’s scent.

His breaths turned to small gasps as he began to run out of them. He turned around and looked at Kai, who had entered the shower cubicle. He stopped before Sehun and stared at him for a beat.

When Sehun lowered his head, Kai gently cupped his face with both hands and lifted it as the water ran down his cheeks. Stepping into the shower, Kai blinked the rivulets from his eyelashes and leaned in to brush a soft kiss to Sehun’s right cheek before the left. He then kissed Sehun’s chin tenderly.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, lips almost brushing against Sehun’s.

Sehun kept his eyes low. He wanted to be pampered too. And cared for. He wanted Kai to hold him and be there for him.

Tilting his head, Kai pressed his mouth against Sehun’s lower lip and kissed it so gently that Sehun’s knees almost buckled.

With a raspy breath, Sehun pulled back and sniffled. He then shook his head lightly and headed out of the bathroom after grabbing a towel.

Not wanting to get back into his dirty clothes, he grabbed one of Kai’s sweaters from the wardrobe and pulled it on.


	37. Chapter 37

His heart almost fell out of his chest when he felt his arm being gripped before he was spun around to face Kai. With water dripping from his hair and trickling down his unclothed body that only had a towel wrapped around his waist, Kai grabbed Sehun by the arm and the waist before pinning him against the wardrobe.

Sehun held his breath, not wanting to inhale Kai’s scent and yield time and again to the Alpha. He wanted to stay mad for a little longer. He wanted Kai to resent himself for leaving Sehun alone yet again.

“I said I’m sorry,” muttered Kai, his hand gripping a side of Sehun’s waist.

Turning his face away, Sehun said, “Sometimes a ‘sorry’ is not enough.”

“What will you have me do then?”

Sehun looked back at Kai’s glaring eyes. “You already know the answer to that.”

Kai’s jaw tightened visibly then. “Sehun,” he sighed, almost dejectedly. “I—”

“What do you do when Noah is on his heat?” Sehun cut him off.

The question seemed to have caught Kai off his guard. He blinked at Sehun, wide-eyed. “What?”

Sehun supposed there was no turning back now. “When he’s on his Calor, what do you do? Do you… sleep with him? Do you take care of him?” It hurt Sehun to even think about it, and boy, did it paint a picture…

He knew what Kai would do. Still, he could not help but ask the question after what Hana told him about looking after Noah during his Calor.

Kai’s eyebrows furrowed into a scowl. “He just recently started on his Calor,” he spat through his teeth.

“What do you when he has them?”

“Why are you doing this?”

“I want you to say it,” Sehun said with steely-eyed determination. He wanted to know if Kai’s answer would cut him deeper or hurt Kai more.

“I do nothing,” Kai admitted at length. “He doesn’t like it when I go near him during his Calor.”

Sehun stared at him vacantly. Kai’s nostrils flared a little as his chest heaved, his breaths short and laboured. “Why… not?”

“Because I’m not his Soulbinder, Sehun,” he hissed. Sehun had figured just as much, but it still felt like a load off his chest hearing it come from Kai.

“You’re still an Alpha,” he murmured, dropping his head.

“I’m not _his_ Alpha,” said Kai, releasing Sehun’s arm so that he could cup a side of Sehun’s face now. His hard expression softened then. “I had to leave for your own safety, Sehun. It was the only reason… I ever leave. Do you think that if I could stay, I would ever leave you?”

Sehun did not respond. He was certain that they were not just honeyed words, but he still did not want to let go of his resentment so soon, even though all that he wanted to do right now was wrap his arms around Kai, nuzzle into the crook of the wolf’s neck and inhale the scent of his skin until it consumed him.

“So… even if Noah doesn’t want you to go near him, you live under the same roof,” Sehun said after a while. “He’s an Omega. You’re an Alpha. Have _you_ never wanted to—”

“Why are you torturing me like this?” Kai growled, withdrawing his hand from Sehun’s face to slam it against the wardrobe near Sehun’s head.

“Because I don’t like it!” Sehun snapped then, eyes stinging in his eyes. “I don’t like the idea of another Omega being so close to you! I don’t, and I never did! When I first saw you with Noah when we were kids… it broke my heart. Every time I think about the fact that you were with him first before we even…” he trailed off for a moment, wiping a tear that rolled down his cheek. “It hurts me, Kai.”

“How do you think I must have felt when I saw you with that guy—”

“I never did anything with him! I did not sleep with him! I couldn’t go through with it no matter how much I wanted to move on from you! The first time I had ever been with someone like that was… when you and I… mated.”

Kai pulled away then. Sehun slumped against the wardrobe, embarrassed by his little outburst. Kai did nothing but gawk at him for a long moment, face paling, eyes reddening.

“What?” Kai let out, gaze boring into Sehun’s eyes.

Sehun looked away, face growing fiercely warm. “You were… the first,” he said in a voice low enough that he was not sure if Kai had even heard it.

For a moment, Kai stood frozen, surveying Sehun’s eyes, as though he were trying to find Sehun’s soul in them. Then without warning, he lunged at Sehun and cupped Sehun’s face in his hands before smashing their mouths together in a desperate, scorching kiss.

He did not let Sehun go until he was thoroughly satisfied, and they were both out of breath. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Kai rasped upon Sehun’s lips, his hands gripping the sides of Sehun’s face.

“I didn’t see the point,” Sehun muttered back, bringing his hands to Kai’s shoulder blades. He then dropped his face against Kai’s shoulder and nuzzled Kai’s neck, wanting to wrap himself up in Kai’s scent.

“You should have,” Kai said breathlessly, a hand closing around Sehun’s chin and jaw as he brushed his lips to Sehun’s cheek, panting hard. “You should have.”

Sehun clenched his eyes tight, tilting his head back with his lips parted as Kai kissed along his cheek. His lips were warm and demanding as they pressed upon a corner of Sehun’s jaw. He then dropped his hands to latch them onto Sehun’s hips.

“I’m sorry,” Kai said once more, gasping against Sehun’s neck as he peppered a side of it with gentle yet blistering kisses. He sounded like there was a lump in his throat that was threatening to break into a sob. “I hadn’t known.”

He slid his hands to the back of Sehun’s thighs that were exposed by the sweater and gripped onto them before he hoisted them up, using the wardrobe at Sehun’s back as leverage.

Sehun was not sure what exactly Kai was apologizing for now. But he could not find the voice to ask as he held onto Kai’s shoulders, arms wrapped his neck.

“I know you were not my first,” Kai mumbled against Sehun’s mouth, his lips teasing Sehun’s with the tip of his tongue lightly brushing them. “But I promise you… you will be my last. Always.”

That sounded ominous. Sehun kept his eyes shut as Kai tipped his head forward and let their mouths crash against one another. Kai pulled back, much to Sehun’s dismay. Chasing after the wolf’s lips, Sehun groaned when Kai flinched back again.

“I wish you had been my first too,” Kai said, pressing their foreheads together. “And I’m sorry for that.”

“So am I,” Sehun whispered.

Kai kissed him then, gently pressing their lips together. Sehun locked his legs around Kai’s waist, parting his lips to let Kai’s tongue slither into his mouth. As he clung onto Kai’s shoulders, Kai slipped his hands up the thighs he was gripping and cupped Sehun’s ass, fingers digging into the thick flesh.

He eventually drew Sehun away from the wardrobe, their mouths still locked, and bore him to the bed.

Sehun buried his fingers in Kai’s hair, losing himself in the kiss. He swore that if his heart beat any faster, it would fall out of his chest.

They only broke apart when Kai plopped him down on the bed. With his legs dangling over the edge of the bed, Sehun fell back against the mattress and caught his breath.

He kept his eyes on Kai, who removed the towel and dropped it to the floor before he took hold of the hem of Sehun’s sweater and shoved it all the way up to Sehun’s chest.

Although they had already shattered all boundaries there were to be broken, Sehun still could not help but blush in embarrassment as Kai stared at his bared lower body, leering at his pearly fair skin, as though he were setting his targets on where to mark Sehun.

Standing between Sehun’s knees, he leaned over the edge of the bed and caught a side of Sehun’s face with one hand while the other was splayed onto Sehun’s belly before he kissed Sehun on the lips, hungrily and breathlessly.

“Kai,” Sehun mewled against Kai’s lips, running his hands down the Alpha’s back.

Even if they had already mated, the way Kai held him this time was different. It was not any less passionate, but it was somehow more intimate. Breaking the kiss, he nudged his nose against Sehun’s neck where he had marked the previous time and placed a soft kiss there.

“Your… family,” Sehun rasped, lifting his feet to the bed to plant his heels firmly into the mattress as he felt Kai’s cock rub against the cleft of his ass.

“We’ll be quiet,” Kai muttered in a breath and lifted his head again to cover Sehun’s mouth with his own. He then drew his hands along the sides of Sehun’s torso, all the way down to grab his thighs. Tugging at them, Kai drew Sehun closer to his own body as he stood near the bed, bent over the edge.

When he pulled back from the kiss, Sehun clamped his arms around the wolf’s neck and yanked him down again to continue kissing him. He wanted to never let go of Kai, worried that if he did, he would once again be left alone. Even the thought of being abandoned again clutched Sehun by the throat and threatened to suffocate him.

He did not know how Kai planned to be ‘quiet’. Sehun did not think that he could, and not to mention, they were in a house full of shifters, whose attentions were probably on them. And if Kai weren’t in control, his pack would be able to hear his songs, too.

There was no way that Kai was convinced that they could just stay ‘quiet’. It almost seemed like he did not care about any of that.

“Kai,” Sehun whimpered into Kai’s mouth. “They would… know.”

Kai growled then, pulling back to grab Sehun’s wrists with one hand before pinning them onto the mattress on top of Sehun’s head. “Let them know then,” he snarled, his wolf eyes flaring red all of a sudden as he forcefully crushed Sehun’s lips under his once more.

“But—” Sehun began to protest but was cut off when Kai wrapped his other hand around Sehun’s neck, his teeth sinking into Sehun’s lower lip, biting and tugging at it.

Sehun fell quiet then, succumbing to his Alpha’s orders. He mewled softly when Kai withdrew his hand from around the neck to grip a side of Sehun’s waist. As his fingers pressed into the soft flesh there, Sehun’s back arched off the bed, his body curling into Kai’s.

He burned. All over. There was something about the way Kai held him so dominatingly that made Sehun’s head spin. His senses were overwhelmed by the Alpha’s scent, by his aggressive songs that were only meant for Sehun, by the guttural growl that rumbled in Kai’s chest.

Kai eventually released Sehun’s wrists and straightened up to stand by the bed’s edge. Then grabbing the back of Sehun’s knees, he folded Sehun’s legs forward and bowed his head.

Sehun clutched at the sheets with both hands as a rough moan broke from his throat when Kai rammed his mouth into the cleft of Sehun’s ass, keeping his grip firm on Sehun’s folded legs.

Sehun brought hand to his mouth to muffle the moans on the back of it as Kai’s tongue darted out to lick along the cleft. His breaths came out harsh and shallow, his chest heaving hard when Kai tongued the puckered rim of muscles, the tip of his tongue prodding into the opening while he smeared his spit all over it. His mouth was wet and hot against the orifice as he ate it out, his eyes fixated on Sehun’s. He only broke their locked gazes when he pulled back to spit onto the opening before licking it up again.

 “Kai…” Sehun bleated, unable to hold his moans back as Kai began to tongue-fuck him. The more Kai’s mouth sloppily ate him out, the hotter Sehun’s body grew, a thin sheen of sweat forming on his skin.

When Kai finally let go of Sehun’s legs and drew back only to lean forward again and kiss Sehun greedily on the mouth, Sehun sat up and yanked Kai down to lie on the bed.

Shifting his weight on the mattress, Sehun then mounted Kai, straddling the wolf between his legs, knees planted firmly into the bed by Kai’s hips.

It took Kai by surprise, his hands curling around the corners of Sehun’s waist.

Taking the sweater off, Sehun flung it over the edge and bent low to kiss Kai. When he began to rock his hips, grinding his ass against Kai’s cock, the wolf growled against Sehun’s lips and tightened his grip on his waist to drag him down so that he could mount Sehun again.

Sehun knew better than to challenge the Alpha any further, although a part of him wanted to drive Kai to the very of his sanity so that as a last resort, the wolf would forsake all of his self-restraint and ravage Sehun completely.

Kai’s kisses grew rougher by the second. Sehun had no complaints. His blood felt as though it were set ablaze. Perhaps it might have been because he was on his Calor, but he was hotter and hungrier. He wanted to be ripped open, and later, when it was all said and done, he wanted to be held gently in Kai’s arms.

He recalled the night they had spent together in his nest. It was where Kai had promised him so many things. Even when they were young and naïve, believing that they owned the world and it was them against everything else and that nothing could ever keep them apart. They had promised themselves each other. Even though their first time in Sehun’s nest had been meaningful beyond comprehension, this was something else. Sehun was on his heat. The intimacy between them was far stronger. The need to mate was fiercely greater. Even Sehun could not deny that his wolf within wanted to break free and mate in its most primal state. For every wall that Kai brought down, he was consumed more and more by the desire to despoil Sehun of whatever innocence that was left of him. He wanted to bathe Sehun in his own scent that at the end of it all, Sehun smelled of nothing but of his Alpha.

Kai briefly got off of Sehun to rummage through the bedside drawers, fumbling for a moment for a tube of lubrication. Then coating his fingers with a generous amount of the lotion, he leaned back down to kiss Sehun. While keeping their mouths occupied, Kai slid his fingers along Sehun’s ass cleft before rubbing the opening, teasing it a little as his tongue slithered into Sehun’s mouth, licking the ridge of it.

Sehun gasped when he felt one of Kai’s finger slide in before almost immediately another entered him as well. He closed his legs around Kai’s waist, fingernails sinking into Kai’s skin at his back.

When a loud, raspy moan spilled from Sehun’s lips, Kai brought his free hand up and clasped it over Sehun’s mouth to stifle the sound and to hold his head down.

“Shh,” Kai hissed as his fingers curled inside Sehun, brushing a bundle of nerves that made Sehun’s eyes roll back. It felt so strangely good that it almost hurt.

Sehun tried to swallow the groans his throat threatened to make as Kai fingered him loose. The discomfort was familiar, but it still was not easy to endure.

When Kai withdrew his hand from Sehun’s face, he hastily grabbed onto Kai’s neck and pulled him down for a kiss. At first, he wanted to distract himself from the pain, but as Kai pushed another finger in and began to massage the warm insides, Sehun drew back from the kiss and dropped his head back against the mattress. He then writhed, finding all sorts of pleasure with every stroke, every prod.

“Ah… there,” he panted in a sharp breath, clenching around Kai’s fingers.

Growling then, Kai retrieved his fingers and knelt up between Sehun’s legs. Grabbing the tube once more, he coated his cock with a thick layer and slathered some more onto the opening.

“Be quiet,” he told Sehun, his breaths erratic.

Sehun tried to follow that order, but there was only so much that he could do to not scream when Kai slid the cockhead into him. With one hand fisted around his own cock, Kai grabbed Sehun’s face, covering his mouth with the other hand.

“Sehun,” Kai said with a sigh, as though he were disappointed that Sehun had not obeyed him. Whimpering against Kai’s hand that had his mouth covered, Sehun focused on his breathing and tried to relax.

 _Love… Mate… Love…_ he heard Kai’s song. It felt like a reassurance.

As he calmed down, Kai pushed all the way in. Then kissing Sehun again, he slowly pulled out only to slither back in.

Sehun latched his mouth to Kai’s shoulder to stop the cries from leaving the walls of the room as Kai began to thrust.

Their bodies, bathed in sweat and heat, were pressed tightly together, with Sehun’s limbs enveloping Kai.

The wolf’s stronger scent began to overtake and overwhelm Sehun’s as Kai drove harder into him. “Don’t… leave me,” Sehun said in a shaky whisper, kissing along Kai’s shoulder.

As the pace of Kai’s thrusts slowed down, Sehun braced himself for what was about to come. He submissively allowed Kai to hold his arms down to the bed as Kai began to swell inside of him. The walls of Sehun’s insides tightened around the cock, his wrists pinned down.

Growling Sehun’s name, Kai dropped his face into the crook of Sehun’s neck. They held still for a long moment while Kai throbbed inside Sehun, his lips lazily kissing along Sehun’s neck where he had marked him the last time.

Sehun did not dare move a muscle, completely trapped under the wolf that was about to sink his teeth into his mate’s flesh.

But he did not. He placed one last kiss on Sehun’s neck before he released Sehun’s wrists and pushed himself up to press their lips together.

When he finally came down from his high, he pulled out of Sehun and dropped onto the bed beside him. Sehun snuggled up at Kai’s side and nestled his head onto Kai’s chest that rose and fell heavily.

Even though the lower part of his body was in a terrible agony, he loved every bit of the soreness. That was how he knew he was alive and he had just mated with his Soulbinder. Again.

He could not ask for anything more. For now.

Once Kai had caught his breath and regained his strength again, he gently took hold of Sehun’s face and pulled it up for a tender, tired kiss.

“You’re burning up,” Kai muttered as he pressed his lips to Sehun’s forehead.

“Don’t go,” Sehun whimpered when Kai began to sit up.

“I was just going to get you some—”

“No,” he mewled, holding Kai back with glistening eyes. “Don’t go anywhere.”

Sighing, Kai lied back down, drawing the blanket over their spent, bare bodies. Then wrapping his arms around Sehun who was trembling, he held him close. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Sehun did not know if it were a promise he could believe, but he believed it, anyway.

“We should go away,” Kai murmured at length, fingers stroking Sehun’s back.

Sehun kept mum, mostly because he did not think he had the strength to do anything but just lay around for the next few hours.

“Somewhere. Just the two of us,” said Kai. “For a while.”

Sehun could not tell if he were being serious or if he were just thinking out loud. But even hearing him say such a thing warmed Sehun’s heart. The fact that Kai wanted to go somewhere with just Sehun, leaving his pack behind, even for a little while made Sehun feel like he had a family again.

“I wish… we could,” he whispered, nuzzling into Kai’s chest with an arm draped over the Alpha’s waist.

Perhaps it was selfish of him to want Kai all to himself. He knew how important a pack was to a wolf. And losing another one of her pack members would devastate Hana. Sehun did not want to put her through such grief again. So, he decided that he was not going to push Kai to do something that would take him away from his mother once more. He had already done that once, even if it were unknowingly, which had cost them all Geun’s life.

 “I go wherever you go,” he heard Kai mutter to himself under his breath then, staring at the ceiling with an arm loosely wrapped around Sehun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my new sekai fic! [Hushed Harmonies](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19226410)  
> Click for other [links](https://revv.carrd.co/)


	38. Chapter 38

The afternoon sunlight squeezed through slits of the curtains that clothed the windows of the bedroom. Sehun squinted at them when he cracked an eye open to acknowledge whatever that had roused him from his deep, well-deserved slumber. He mumbled out a curse as he shut his eyes again and grabbed one of the blankets, tugging it closer to his naked body. Clenching it at his chest with one hand, he brought the other to push away the weight that was resting on top of the blanket, so that he could have it all to himself.

As his hand touched a warm, solid plane of muscles, his eyes fluttered open again to look at the man sleeping next to him, who was sharing the bed, pillows, and blankets. It took Sehun a moment to realize that he was still in bed with the Alpha, all spent and worn out after a lengthy, much needed session of intimacy. Nearly every part of his body was sore and bruised. Not that he was complaining about any of that.

But Kai was still sleeping on the blanket. Sehun tried to push him away to yank the blanket from under him without waking him up. Once he had successfully pulled all of the blankets, he gathered them around his body before pressing himself to Kai’s side for the warmth and scent.

Though deep in his sleep, Kai let out a soft groan as he unconsciously draped an arm around Sehun, drawing him close, so that he could nuzzle his nose into the crook of Sehun’s neck.

Sleep claimed Sehun once more. He had never felt more protected and safer. He believed that this was where he belonged. All his life, he had been building a nest for him and his Soulbinder. But perhaps, this was what nesting truly meant. Here, this moment, he was safe and sound in Kai’s arms as their bodies were swaddled in warm, woolly blankets.  

* * *

When he woke up again, it was to the sound of Kai grumbling in his sleep and the grip of his hand around Sehun’s wrist. The room was dark.

“Kai?” Sehun drawled drowsily, lifting his head from the pillow, blinking his sleep-leaden eyes at Kai, whose eyebrows were drawn together with a grieving scowl etched to his shut eyes.

Worried, Sehun sat up and tried to wriggle his wrist free from the wolf’s grip. He heard a growl rumble in Kai’s chest then.

“Kai,” he tried calling him awake once more.

 _No,_ he heard the wolf’s song. A sorrowful, helpless song. _No, Dad… I’m so… sorry…_

Sehun’s heart sank as he raised his free hand to Kai’s chest. “Kai, wake up,” he said softly, leaning his head against the Alpha’s shoulder.

As his eyes flung open, Kai took in a sharp breath, chest heaving as he panted. “Sehun,” he muttered, releasing Sehun’s wrist while his arm tightened around Sehun’s waist.

Bringing his head up, Sehun stared into Kai’s red, wolf eyes before they faded back to his usual ones. “You were… dreaming,” whispered Sehun, sliding his fingers into Kai’s hair to stroke it. He liked the idea of an Omega comforting an Alpha. Made him feel important. And Sehun rarely felt important when it came to Kai.

Once he had caught his breath, he looked at Sehun and gave a slight shake of his head. “It was… nothing.”

Sehun frowned. “It was not… nothing,” he muttered, walking his hand down Kai’s sternum. “You said something about… your dad.”

Kai turned his gaze away then. He was silent for a long minute. Sehun yanked the blankets around them and climbed up to his knees in order to straddle Kai.

Surprised, Kai looked at him again with an arched eyebrow, hands rising to hold Sehun by the edges of his waist. “Sehun,” he sighed.

Sitting on top of Kai’s belly, Sehun pressed his hands to the wolf’s abdomen and pinned him with a frown. “Was the dream about… Geun? Do you… often have dreams about him?”

Kai did not answer him as his hands drooped along the sides of Sehun’s thighs. Then with a heavy breath, he gripped Sehun’s waist forcefully and plopped the Aequus back to the bed before mounting him.

“Don’t get on top of me when you’re on your Calor,” Kai said calmly but authoritatively. It was a command. Sehun blinked at him as he was pinned under the Alpha for the second time.

And god, did it turn him on…

Then almost immediately, Kai’s grip loosened on Sehun’s waist. “Did I… hurt you?” he asked with obvious concern.

Sehun shook his head, even though he was in significant pain from all that knotting business, which he did not think he could ever get used to. But he most certainly did not hate it enough to not want it again.

“Please, don’t change the subject,” he told Kai.

Huffing heavily, Kai dropped to lie down next to him and threw an arm over his forehead. “Yes… I did… _do_ dream about him.”

Sehun fell silent for a moment, thinking about all the times he had dreamed about his parents. All the times he had dreamed about everyone that left him to rot in a dark space.

“What… do you dream about him?” he asked gently, not wanting to cause Kai any more grief.

Kai shrugged lightly, even though his gaze was sheening with despair. “You don’t want to know, Sehun.”

“But I do,” said Sehun, not entirely sure if that were true. He did not know how much of Kai’s grief he could share, knowing that he had a huge part to play in Geun’s death. Did Kai ever forgive Sehun for it, though?

“Sehun…”

“For what it’s worth,” Sehun whispered then. “I’m sorry, too. If it weren’t for me… none of you would have had to protect me. And you would not have left your pack. And Geun would… be alive.”

Kai sat up and fixed Sehun with a lour. “That was not on you, Sehun.”

“I think it was,” said Sehun, keeping his gaze low. “Even if you don’t want to say it, you are thinking it. Everything would have been better if we had never met.”

“No, I don’t think that.”

“Yes, you do. And so does everyone else. I know Jaehyun certainly does.”

Kai closed his eyes momentarily, taking in deep breaths. Sehun sat up and watched him intently.

“Everyone… blames _me_ ,” Kai said in a very low voice that Sehun was not sure if the man was talking to him or himself. “And they should. I made the decision to leave my pack. And when I had nowhere else to go, I was weak and I had wanted my pack back. A wolf without its pack is just… a beast with no home.”

“I was the reason all of that happened,” said Sehun.

Kai’s eyes flashed open, and his hands rose to cup Sehun’s cheeks. “No. All of that happened because… I love you and I wanted to… go wherever you go. Those were _my_ choices. Not yours. And as the universe constantly keeps pointing out, I make… bad choices.”

Sehun leaned into Kai’s touch lovingly. Lord, he had never felt more loved. And in all honesty, he never wanted anything more. He could die this way, and he would be happy.

“Not always,” he whispered to Kai, smiling weakly. He then took one of Kai’s hands and held it to his chest. “You… feel that?”

Kai blinked blankly for a second. “What?” he asked. “Your heart?”

Sehun nodded. “Yes.”

Kai splayed his fingers over Sehun’s chest and exhaled a sigh while his other hand curled around the back of Sehun’s neck. “Yeah.”

Sehun climbed into Kai’s lap then, planting a hand in Kai’s hair as he stared down into the Regnandi’s bewildered eyes. “Don’t break it a second time.”

It was not a command.

Sehun could not command. He was no Alpha. He was just a nobody.

It was a plea.

Kai’s hand slid down from Sehun’s chest to his belly. His palm was warm against the stomach. “I’m not sure… if I can make you that promise, Sehun.”

Sehun did not know what that meant, but there was something gravely ominous about the way Kai said it.

“But I will promise you this,” Kai said then, drawing Sehun’s head down until their lips brushed upon one another. “When your heart breaks… mine breaks with yours.”

Sehun’s breathing laboured as he began to lean in for a kiss.

They froze with a start when they heard the heavy rapping on the door.

“Dinner is ready,” they heard Yixing say and giggle on the other side of the door.

Kai groaned. “Go the fuck away!” he yelled at his brother.

“I would love to, but we can’t keep your side Omega distracted for long.” As he walked away, Yixing grumbled, “Some men can’t even handle one, but not my brother. He wants a village!”

Sehun drew himself off of Kai and leaned against the headboard, hugging his knees to his chest, still wrapped in the blankets. “Noah… doesn’t know, right?”

Kai rubbed his temples as he sat up on the edge of the bed. “I don’t care if he does.”

“Since when?”

Kai scowled at him then. Sehun fell quiet. “Since I dared to mate with you under the same roof as a pack of wolves.”

“I was… quiet.”

Kai scoffed as he rose from the bed and grabbed a pair of sweatpants from the wardrobe. “Not quiet enough for wolf ears. Get dressed. I don’t want my brothers or brother-in-law walking in here and seeing you like that.”

Sehun pulled on the sweater that was discarded on the floor. “I’m hungry.”

“I’ll bring you up some food.”

“I can walk down.”

“You’re not going anywhere.”

“Why not?”

Kai pinned him with a hard look then. “Because I said so.”

“I don’t want to… stay away from you,” Sehun murmured, cheeks burning and flushed red.

Kai gave in after a minute of staring Sehun down. Sighing, he picked Sehun up from the bed and pressed a kiss to Sehun’s forehead. “The kitchen. Then my room.”

Sehun nodded obediently.

* * *

When they reached the kitchen, Noah, Yixing, Jeni and Chanri were already at the table. Don and Hana were preparing the salad. Jaehyun was nowhere to be seen.

Kai retrieved his hand from the small of Sehun’s back when Noah looked in their way. The Regnandi Omega’s eyes narrowed as he turned them away sharply, jaw clenched tight. He knew.

Of course, he knew. Everyone in the neighbourhood would know. Sehun smelled more like Kai than himself now. But the question was, why was not Noah throwing a fit over it?

“Sit. I will get you something to drink,” Kai muttered to Sehun before he wandered over to the kitchen island where he grabbed a glass tumbler and the opened bottle of whiskey. As Sehun took his seat, Noah jumped from his and skipped over to Kai.

“Kai?” he called, clinging onto Kai’s arm. “Get me something too, will you?”

“Hm,” was Kai’s curt response as he pulled away from the boy to yank the refrigerator open.

Hana kept her attention to herself, but Don was smirking at Kai.

“So, Sehun,” said Don when he walked over to the table with the bowl of salad. “I hope you took the _rest_ I had prescribed.”

Chanri coughed as she deliberately stepped on her husband’s foot. Hissing, Don smiled playfully before bowing his head to kiss the top of Chanri’s head.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” he whispered to his wife.

Jeni pretended to not to notice anything as she chewed on the garlic bread. So did Yixing, who did not even spare Sehun or Kai a glance. They were all playing coy, and Sehun was unbelievably embarrassed. He should have just stayed upstairs.

Withdrawing a carton of orange juice from the refrigerator, Kai filled a cup with it.

Sehun shifted his attention to Noah, who was gripping his fists tightly at his back, staring at Kai with his nostrils flaring. As soon as Kai turned to him, the Omega grinned again.

Kai handed Noah the cup of orange juice instead of the tumbler of whiskey he had poured for himself, when Noah tried to reach for it.

Taking hold of the cup, Noah frowned. “I don’t want this juice. Don’t you have anything hard for me?” he asked, grabbing onto Kai’s arm again.

Kai took a sip of the whiskey and turned away, eyes almost rolling, as he mumbled under his breath, “God knows I really don’t.”

Sehun bit back on a snicker.

Ambling over to the table with the juice carton, he poured some into Sehun’s glass. Sehun chugged it down thirstily and demanded some more. Blinking, Kai refilled the cup.

As everyone took their seat at the table, no one said a word. Not even Don or Yixing, who could never hold back an unwanted remark.

And then the backdoor swung open.

Jaehyun stormed into the kitchen and stopped to glare at Sehun. “No,” he spat, growling as he stomped over to the table. “No. We’re not sitting here and pretending like you two did not just _fuck_ right under our noses.”

“Jaehyun,” chided Hana.

“First you bring him into our home, and then you risk everything and screw him!” He was yapping at Kai now. “Just how many of us do you plan to murder before you’re done with us? Just because you can’t bloody learn to keep it in your pants!”

Kai stood up and let out a heavy breath. “Jaehyun—”

Jaehyun slapped Kai’s hand away when Kai tried to touch his shoulder. “You’re in way over your—” He did not finish however as he and Kai froze for a brief moment, eyes bulging.

It took Sehun a moment to understand why everyone else in the room had gone completely silent and alert.

There was someone unwelcome in their territory.

“Kai,” Hana called in a low voice.

“Stay inside,” said Kai as he started toward the front door. He stopped in his tracks however when they heard a car pull up on the dirt road.

Jaehyun, Yixing, Don and Chanri followed Kai to the porch. And so did Sehun after a while when he heard Taeyong’s voice.

“Oh, hi,” said Taeyong as he climbed out of his car.

The night air was filled with a blend of wolf scents, some of which Sehun distinctly recognized. His blood began to run cold.

Jaehyun looked panicked all of a sudden as he hurried down the porch steps and marched over to Taeyong with his fists balled. “What the hell are you doing here?” he demanded through his clenched teeth.

For an instant, Sehun thought that the Alpha was about to put a fist through Taeyong’s face.

But then Jaehyun only grabbed Taeyong by the arm and started yanking him back to the car. “Leave,” he ordered Taeyong.

“Ouch,” groaned Taeyong, pulling his arm free. “What’s your deal, dude? I just wanted to check on Sehun after your brother practically abducted him last night. Where is he?”

“Taeyong,” Sehun called from where he stood on the porch. When he tried to climb down the steps, Kai caught his wrist and stopped him. As he looked up at Kai, he realized that Kai’s eyes were flaring red, and they were focused on the darkness of the night, especially the one that resided between the trees that surrounded the house.

“What part of _leave_ don’t you get?” Jaehyun snarled at Taeyong, tugging at his arm again.

“What part of _you’re a motherfucking jerk_ don’t _you_ get?” he spat at the wolf, who looked like he would burst into his beast form at any given second now.

“I’m a jerk?”

“Oh, come on. That can’t be news to you,” scoffed Taeyong, shoving Jaehyun back by the chest. “You’re like _The Jerk_. _Jerkosaurus. Count Jerkula. Jerkzilla_. _Jerkhyun_.”

Jaehyun turned to the trees, eyes narrowing. He put himself before Taeyong.

“Sehun, get inside,” Kai ordered in a breath.

But Sehun did not move. He could not as he spied the wolves that emerged from the dark and the trees, baring their teeth, eyes flickering with ferocity and a hunger for aggression.

“Rexits,” Yixing murmured.

And there were… so many of them.

Taeyong, realizing just exactly what he had walked into at a very wrong time, raised a hand to Jaehyun’s arm to hold onto it. Though Jaehyun scowled at the hand that was curled around his elbow, he did not object it.

“They’re not… the bad ones, right?” Taeyong whispered as the wolves edged closer to the house.

“There are no good ones,” said Jaehyun, taking a step toward the house.

“Well, what about your hot dad? He certainly seemed like one of the good—”

“Shut up before I fling you over to them so that they can use you as a toothpick when they’re done with us.”

“Okay, roger that.”

Sehun knew they were surrounded. “What do we do?” he asked Kai.

Kai’s breathing was ragged as he continued to stare at the Rexits.


	39. Chapter 39

Fear and anxiety overtook his senses and made his heart thunder behind his chest. Though this was not the first time Sehun had been caught in the middle of a wolf business, his body was reacting differently this time. He was more nervous than he had ever been. Being surrounded by all those Rexits made his stomach clench. He wanted to flee the place. And he wanted to take Kai with him, so that they could run away as far as they could where no one would be able to find them.

Kali must be pissed. Especially after what Sehun had did to him. He had turned his back to the exiled Alpha after promising the wolf his alliance and loyalty, only to have come back to the Regnandis who had screwed him up. Sehun could understand why it would have pissed Kali off.

“Kai,” Sehun called in a weak whisper, fingers tightening around Kai’s hand. “You cannot fight off all of them.”

“I don’t think they are here for me,” said Kai, eyes narrowed at the wolves that were closing in on them.

Sehun blinked at him. Well, Kai had a point. Even though Kai and his family were fighting against the Rexits by joining hands with the notorious _Princeps_ of the Regnandi echelon, they were still Kali’s own family. If he had wanted to hurt them, he would have done so the minute they had stepped foot in Oakenbury again.

This might have been Geun’s turf once. But with him and his pack gone for years, Kali had claimed it and made it a home for the Rexits. The Regnandis wanted to get rid of them, drive them away until they had no territory to call their own. No pack, no home. They would be soon driven to madness, having lost the last of their humanity as they had nothing to keep them tethered to the human side of them. Kali was helping the Rexits. He was fighting the tyranny the Regnandis exercised over them. His cause was right. His reason was noble. Perhaps Sehun was a coward for stepping down from what he had promised he would do. Or he was simply a fool in blind love. All because he was given a new spark of hope for a future with his Soulbinder. Was it the right decision? Sehun could not say for certain. But he knew if he stayed on Kali’s side any longer, there was a chance that he would lose Kai again. He was not ready for that.

He would go against the entire world if it boiled down to that, if that was what it took for him to be with Kai and his pack.

Even if it meant that he had to go against Kali, who was only looking out for the ones who were treated with injustice. Nevertheless, he believed in Kai, and he trusted that Kai had a plan. Perhaps bloodshed could be avoided altogether if Kai were successful in his plan.

“What do you want?” asked Kai when Kali finally emerged from the pack of Rexits. Sehun spotted Jack, Maza and Vergel among the wolves.

Kali did not look cocky as he approached the house with his hands balled into fists at his sides. “I am getting awfully tired of your shenanigans,” the Alpha spat, his blue eyes flaring at Kai with ferocity. “So, I am going give you two options. And I will not remind you again that I do not have a lot of patience right now to entertain relatives.”

“Neither do I,” said Kai. Sehun squeezed Kai’s hand in his grip, quietly hoping that Kai would not provoke Kali right now. They were seriously outnumbered, and even though Sehun had his doubts that Kali would hurt them for no reason, he knew Kali did not have much of an incentive to _not_ hurt them either.

Eyebrows furrowing deeper, Kali slid his hands into the pockets of his coat. “I am no coward like you Regnandis. If I have a bone to pick with you, I will do it face-to-face. It would not take me two seconds to break in and ambush your family. But I am going to do this quite civilly. Your father would have wanted you to be the leader of the pack, Kai. And I see such qualities in you, too. But I do have my doubts. So, let’s put that to the test, shall we?”

Sehun was not sure what Kali was getting it, but those words were not empty words, and Kali did not come all the way here with return emptyhanded either.

“Get to the point, Uncle Kali,” said Yixing then.

Kali did not take his eyes off Kai. “I know exactly where you stand.” His gaze then briefly shifted to Sehun. Though Sehun did not look away, he felt his heartbeat quicken when Kali glowered at him. “And you.”

Sehun lowered his head then, but only for a moment. He looked back up at Kali and held the Alpha’s gaze. He had nothing to be ashamed of, even if he were very nervous about the situation that was unravelling around him. He had made his decision, and he had in fact chosen to let Kai get to him. Because he believed Kai, more than anything, in spite of everything that had happened. And right now, he wanted to stand by Kai’s side and be his support.

He did not run away when they were kids and the wolves attacked them. He was not going to run away now.

“But you are outnumbered,” said Kali. “And I warned you. This is no longer your territory, and I told you to stay away. But you brought your _Princep_ friends over, and you stood by and watched while they hurt more of our kind and your precious boyfriend’s. The longer we stay silent, the more we lose our advantage. So, I am going to let you decide.”

“Get the fuck out of here before I lose my temper, Uncle,” Kai said through his grit teeth.

Sehun stared at Kai for a moment. There was a certain anger and harshness in Kai’s tone, which Sehun had not heard before. His threats were as real as Kali’s. His wolf eyes were as red as blood. A low growl was rumbling in his chest. He withdrew his hand from Sehun’s and climbed down the steps of the porch.

“I am going to be very honest with you,” Taeyong muttered in a shaky breath, hiding behind Jaehyun, hands holding onto Jaehyun’s arm. “I am immensely terrified right now.”

Jaehyun also looked like he was ready for a fight. Perhaps there would be one after all.

Sehun would have begged Kai to stay if only he had found his voice.

“You do not get to demand anything. Not after everything you have done,” Kai told his uncle.

“Everything I’ve done?” Kali scoffed. “You find fault in my past decisions?” He chuckled then. It was a dreadful sound that made Sehun’s body shudder. “You know what I find impressively ironic about this situation, don’t you?” He arched an eyebrow, looking to Sehun once more before he pinned Kai with an amused look. “History is repeating itself in your case, nephew. Lamentably so.”

Kai stopped then, hands gripped tight. “Last warning.”

“All right,” huffed Kali. “I would love to let you and the other Regnandis run the show. But I’ve got to throw these wolves a bone once in a while. They will unquestionably and unequivocally attack you and those who you care about tonight. I will not stop them, and neither will any of you be able to. Even if ten of them died, they would have gotten their claws on at least one of you. They want to protect their home as much as you do yours.”

Kai clenched his jaw. “And you are about to offer me an alternative, Uncle?”

“I am,” said Kali. “You are keeping something that might be of absolute value to us. Something that would give us a big leverage over the _Princeps_.”

Sehun’s hands began to tremble.

“Ryder’s little brother.”

Kai’s breathing noticeably quickened. “Kali, you have gone mad.”

“I haven’t,” said Kali. “But I’m about to.”

“Kali,” said a voice from behind. Sehun turned his head halfway around to look at Hana, who walked out of the house. “Why are you doing this?”

“They want the annoying redhead?” Taeyong whispered to Jaehyun. “Well, hand him over! It’ll be good riddance for Sehun, and we’ll all get to live to see another day. It’s definitely a win-win situation.”

“Shut it before I rip your tongue out,” Jaehyun hissed back.

“I haven’t done anything yet, Hana,” said Kali. “But I am trying to prevent something from happening. Hand over the boy, and we’ll be on our way. Or stand up against us and get yourselves hurt. Either way, we are not leaving without him. So, I suggest that you make it easier for you.”

“You will exacerbate the Regnandis’ disfavour of you and aggravate them,” replied Hana.

“Oh, we’re counting on that.”

“If you harm Noah,” spat Kai next. “his father, brother and every last one of the _Princeps_ will order the Regnandis to rip your and all of your Rexit lickspittles’ heads off.”

Kali scoffed. “I seriously doubt it. Unless they _want_ to find the boy limbed and dismembered in the woods.”

The timber wolf, with the ring on the bridge of its nose, standing at Kali’s side stopped snarling all of a sudden and looked up at the Alpha with a sudden hesitance. It then glanced back to the front door through which Noah stepped out with a worried frown etched to his face.

“Noah,” called Hana, taking hold of his arm. “Get back inside.”

Noah refused to obey. He was staring at Kai now, eyes glistening with tears.

“Get him,” Kali told Maza.

As the wolf galloped forward, bulleting toward Noah, Kai and Jaehyun lunged at the wolf, erupting into their wolf forms. Sehun’s heart was nearly stopped as the white and brown beasts bounded at Maza, the former clawing at her face while the latter latched his jaw around the scruff of her neck. Immediately, two other Rexits pounced on Jaehyun and Kai, tearing them away from Maza. As the five wolves broke into a vicious and loud scuffle, Kali shook his head and sighed.

“Always making things harder than it should be,” he said.

“Stop!” Sehun rasped and began to rush over to Kai but was stopped by Yixing, who held him back.

“You don’t want to get into that, trust me,” Yixing growled, yanking Sehun back.

Kicking the wolf off him, the white wolf scrambled back to its paws and turned to snarl at Kali. But as the other Rexits quickly surrounded it, the wolf growled and bared its teeth, unable to do much more unless it had a death wish.

“I’ve got all night, nephew,” said Kali with nonchalance. “And these wolves have nothing to lose. They will fight until they die.”

“I’ll go,” Noah spoke up then.

All heads turned to him.

“Don’t hurt anyone,” said the Regnandi Omega, his bloodshot eyes looking to Sehun momentarily.

Hana stepped before Noah when he started to walk toward the Rexits. “No. You will not go with them,” she said as she continued to scowl at Kali. “Don’t do this, Kali. Noah has nothing to do with your revenge.”

“This isn’t revenge, Hana,” Kali snapped. “You know pretty darn well that I am beyond avenging my mate and my son. I just don’t want my fate to be shared by anyone else.”

“And your answer to it all is to involve an innocent?”

“Sometimes, there will be casualties in a war.”

“We would rather die fighting than just let you take him,” said Yixing.

Even though Sehun was not Noah’s biggest fan, and he would love to see Noah leave Kai’s side, he did not want Noah to walk into Kali’s trap. Even if it were only to be used as a leverage. Unlike the Regnandis, Kali was trying to prevent the breakout of a war, although he was clearly prepared for one. Using Noah to get to the _Princeps_ might be the least aggressive way. But knowing the Regnandis well enough, Sehun doubted that it would go the way Kali was planning it would.

“It is my choice,” said Noah, yanking his arm free from Hana’s grip. “No one has to get hurt for my sake. I know that I am not that welcome here. You don’t have to suffer for someone you do not even care for.”

“We care for you, Noah,” said Hana, looking rather shocked by his accusations.

“No, you don’t. I know who you care for.” With that, he shoved past Hana and the others and walked over to Kali with a bead of tear rolling down his cheek.

The timber wolf, Jack, growled lightly when Noah walked past him. When it tried to sniff his hand, Noah swatted it away with a slap on the snoot.

“You are braver than anyone else in your family,” said Kali, putting an arm around Noah’s shoulders. Next to the Alpha, Noah’s frame was small and dainty. He looked scared. He was shivering.

“Kali,” Hana called, tears welling up in her eyes. “Don’t do this. Don’t make things worse. They will come. They will come for all of us.”

Without a reply, Kali turned around and disappeared into the woods with Noah, who walked away, gazing back at the others fearfully.

Though Kai knew that he had no other option, the white wolf howled into the night grievously with rage. The brown wolf limped back to the house, one of its shoulders bleeding with a gnarly gash on it.

As Jaehyun transformed back into his human form, he hissed and cupped a hand over the bleeding would on his shoulder.

“Ryder is going to kill us all,” said Chanri as Don hurried over to Jaehyun’s side to have a look at the wound.

“I’m fine!” Jaehyun spat at Don and punched a fist into a wooden post on the porch on his way inside.

Hana stood still for a moment with her eyes clenched before she too wended her way into the house, holding a hand to her mouth.

“We’re so screwed,” muttered Yixing as Sehun finally dragged himself over to the white wolf that was still looking in the direction of the way Kali had disappeared in with Noah.

Dropping to his knees at Kai’s side, Sehun brought a shaky hand to the wolf and buried his fingers in its thick, snowy fur. He remembered playing with it when they were younger. Kai loved it when Sehun touched his fur.

The wolf whined softly as Sehun pressed his face into its shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he whispered to Kai.

* * *

“Will you stop moving?!”

Sehun came to a halt in the hallway when he heard Taeyong’s shriek from a room there.

“Do you even know how to do this?” asked Jaehyun. “I thought you were a teacher.”

“I know how to change a bandage,” replied Taeyong. “Now, stop being a baby.”

Sighing, Sehun made his way back to Kai’s bedroom, where he found Kai, standing by the window with his arms crossed over his chest as he continued to stare out the window at the trees.

“Kai?” called Sehun.

Kai did not respond.

Shutting the door behind him, Sehun took a step toward Kai but stopped when his eyes darted to the photograph on the desk. Words formed a lump in his throat and made it difficult for him to breathe for a moment.

“Kali will not hurt him,” Sehun eventually said in a small voice. “I don’t think he is that sort of a man.”

“He isn’t,” said Kai without turning around to face Sehun. “It isn’t him I’m worried about.”

“Then what is it?”

“Noah does not deserve to be a pawn in this game. And… Ryder and the _Princeps_ are going… flip out.”

“What do you think they’ll do?”

Kai did not answer.

Sehun walked over to the Alpha and put a hand on Kai’s arm. “Kai?”

Turning around, Kai looked at him, eyes boring into Sehun’s. “I am worried about what they could do to you, Sehun.”

Sehun lowered his gaze. “Because… I was on the Rexits’ side for a while there?”

“Fuck,” Kai spat then, gritting his teeth. “So close.”

“So close to what?”

“Kali should not have reacted,” he said, pulling away from Sehun to pace a hole into the floor of the room. He rubbed his jaw and ran a hand through his hair. “Sehun, I can’t have you in danger.”

“I won’t be in danger, Kai.”

“Yes, you will. I keep trying to do everything so perfectly and this fucking happens. Now, it’s all…” he trailed off, groaning in frustration. Then crossing the room, he took hold of Sehun’s face in his hands and pulled him close. “You should leave. You need to go. Far away from Oakenbury. Far away from me.”

Sehun could not tell if Kai were being serious or if he were just spiralling in the heat of the moment. “Kai…”

“The _Princeps_ will raze this place down before they agree to Kali’s terms and kill every last one of the Rexits and the Aequuses who abet them. And if they find out about… me and you, they will never spare you, Sehun. Not after your history with the Rexits and Kali.”

“Maybe they won’t find out.”

“They will.”

Sehun’s eyes stung with tears. He pressed his hands to Kai’s chest and shook his head. “Don’t ask me to stay away from you again. I don’t think… I can handle… it, Kai.”


	40. Chapter 40

**_Entr’acte_ **

“Is he in there?” Jack inquired, walking up to Maza, who stood guard near the door in the hallway.

“Yeah,” she said, rubbing her forehead. Then picking on her long dreadlocked hair, she arched an eyebrow at Jack. “What is that big frown on your face for?”

Jack blinked and quickly wiped the anxious look away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He ran a hand through his hair and scratched a part of his bearded cheek.

“Uh-huh.”

“Can I… see him?”

“He’s very fidgety and afraid,” said Maza. “He literally thinks we’re going to eat him.”

“Well, I didn’t make any promises that I won’t.”

“Kali said no one is to touch him, Jack,” she said, bringing a hand to Jack’s chest to stop him when he started for the door.

“Relax,” said Jack. “I just want to see how he’s doing.”

With her brows furrowed, Maza retrieved her hand and stepped aside. “And while you’re at it, will you get him to eat something? He is getting on my nerve.”

“He hasn’t eaten anything?”

“Not since we brought him here.”

Jack scratched the back of his head. Somewhere in his heart, a heart he once believed was non-existent, he felt an ache. He did not like it one bit.

“He looked pretty confident when he went with Kali last night.”

“A front,” scoffed Maza, rolling her eyes. “He is an Omega after all. An unmated one at that. I might say that his misgivings are quite reasonable, given that I have already driven away four randy dogs since last night that wanted a piece of him.”

Jack’s hands tightened into fists at his sides involuntarily as his jaw clenched. Then realizing that he was reacting unnecessarily, he loosened up. But it was too late because Maza had noticed the fleeting anger that shot through Jack’s gaze.

“Let me see if I can get him to eat something,” said Jack, pushing past one of his oldest friends.

“You care about the Regnandi Omega?”

Jack stopped and looked back at Maza, pinning her with a scowl. “No. I just happen to care about keeping our precious cargo fresh and plump while presenting him to our enemy.”

Crossing her arms over her chest, Maza leaned back against the wall and smirked. “Uh-huh.”

Jack rolled his eyes and started for the door.

“Jack, I won’t hesitate to kick your ass if you touch the boy,” she then warned him.

“Don’t worry,” he spat. “Skinny redheads are not my type.”

He let himself into the room. Though he did not support the five-star treatment for the enemy when Kali decided to give the hostage the guestroom, it brought him some sort of relief to know that the boy was not locked in some dingy dungeon.

As soon as he entered, his eyes flitted to the dark drapes, whose slits allowed little light into the room. Then he slowly looked to the bed. It was untouched, the sheets unused. The scent that filled the very air Jack breathed made his throat close and his heartbeat quicken. His felt a little lightheaded.

It smelled of peppermint and the ocean. The scents Jack loved the most.

They blanketed around him and wrapped him in a momentary daze. Jack loved to think of himself both emotionally and physically strong. He was stronger than most Betas. But this… This made him weak. So weak that he wanted to drop to his knees and break into tears, and he could not even remember the last time he had shed a single tear.

Probably when his own family had disowned him and let him become a Rexit.

Every Rexit had their own harrowing backstory. Jack did not like revisiting his.

He looked for the boy in the room and almost did not notice him curled up into a ball on the floor in a corner of the room, fast asleep. He must have stayed up all night.

A lump began to form in Jack’s throat, making it significantly difficult for him to breathe. He recalled the first time he had seen the ginger-haired Omega. His hand unconsciously rose to his nose to rub it, fingers stroking the thick nose ring between his nostrils.

He took a few steps closer to the sleeping boy then and dropped to a crouch, eyes raking the Omega’s serene face. He looked so peaceful like this. Jack never found anything serene or peaceful. Hell, those words sounded incredibly corny even in privacy of his head.

The floor was cold. There was a slight tremor in the Regnandi’s body as he slept. He was small, petite. Jack could literally crush him in one arm. He then looked up at the plate of ham sandwiches that were untouched on the bedside table.

Sighing, he carefully slid his arms around the Omega and lifted him from the ground. As he bore the boy to the bed, he could not stop his heart from hammering wildly against his ribs. He thought that if he inhaled, his heart might just pop out of his chest. So, he held his breath, not wanting to take in any of the Omega’s intoxicating scent.

As he reached the edge of the bed, the boy began to stir lightly in his arms. Jack froze. The redhead slowly cracked his eyes open and blinked drowsily at Jack.

For a moment, the boy did nothing but stare with half-lidded, sleep-leaden eyes. Then as though he had been slapped awake, he gasped, eyes bulging open, hands flinging up to grab Jack’s shirt. He tugged at it so hard that he ripped off a couple of buttons.

“No!” he screamed, wriggling in Jack’s arms before he backhanded Jack across the face. It did not exactly hurt, but it still caught Jack by surprise. The boy had some seriously sharp knuckles. “Let me go! You ugly beast!”

_Ugly beast?_

Jack dropped the boy.

Falling onto the bed with a thud, Ryder’s little brother crawled as far away as he could from Jack and knelt up, eyes still wide and full of fear, chest heaving as he panted for air.

“I am a shifter, too!” he yapped at Jack, who was gawking at him with something akin to surprise and amusement. “I will fight you if I have to!”

_Damn, he’s cute._

“Don’t flatter yourself, pup,” Jack muttered, looking down at his torn shirt. He then glared at the boy. “Three.”

The Omega grabbed a pillow. “Three?” he asked, scowling back at Jack.

“You have hit me three times.”

The boy knew exactly what Jack was talking about, judging by the lack of confusion and curiosity in his expression. He simply averted his gaze for a moment and gripped the pillow against his chest. Then glowering back at Jack, his eyes surveyed the ring on Jack’s nose first. They slowly dropped to Jack’s bullneck and then his haired chest that was now exposed by the shirt he had just torn apart.

“Now, if we’re keeping count,” said Jack, rubbing his bearded jaw. “That’s you three and me zero.”

“My brother will kill you if you touch me.”

“Hmm. Maybe.” He picked up the plate of sandwiches. “But by the looks of it, your brother is not here, is he?”

The boy gulped. “I have a fiancé, who is an Alpha. He will come for me.”

“Last time I checked, he has a thing for his childhood lover, doesn’t he? The Aequus.”

There was a sudden twist in the boy’s expression. He looked away, eyebrows dipped low and jaw locked. “Sehun,” he spat through his teeth.

“Yes. Sehun. Now, why would any man want your skinny butt when they get someone like Sehun in the deal?”

The boy kept mum, keeping his eyes low.

“He is an Aequus, sure. But he is an Omega nonetheless. And he’s gorgeous, is he not?” He took a bite of the sandwich. “So beautiful that any Alpha would want to make him theirs. Not to mention they are each other’s Soulbinder. You’re in way over your head, kid.”

That was when he saw a bead of tear roll down the Regnandi’s cheek. He kept his head hung and eyes low as he quietly wept, sniffling every now and then. Jack almost regretted saying all that.

Putting the plate aside, he rubbed the nape of his neck and fumbled for words for a moment. “I…”

The boy wiped his cheeks and looked up at Jack with a daggering scowl. “I will have every last one of you razed to the ground.”

Jack stared at him for a length with his eyes narrowed. Then tossing the plate onto the bed, he said, “Whatever. Eat up.”

“I don’t want it,” the Omega growled adamantly.

“I wasn’t asking.”

“I said I don’t want it!”

“Then starve yourself to death. Nobody’s coming to save you. If they were, they would be here already. And I wonder why they’re not.”

The words must have cut the boy because his eyes began to brim with tears again. But he turned his face away to hide them.

Shaking his head, Jack wended his way out of the room. “Nobody goes in,” he told Maza, slamming the door shut behind him. “Not until he is begging for food and water.”

“Jack—”

“Ought to teach him not to screw with us.”

But as he stomped away, his heart continued to ache. It was an odd feeling. One that he had never experienced before.

* * *

Though the night had ended in many tears and pleas, Sehun still woke to a familiar warmth that fulfilled him the next morning. The period of his Calor was nearing its end. The desperation and hunger for his Alpha’s scent and warmth had turned into a want and desire for comfort.

When he opened his eyes, he wondered at what point during the night he might have gathered the blankets and pillows around them to make a nest. He glanced at Kai, who was still asleep, after nearly an entire night of plotting and thinking of a retaliation plan. By now, the _Princeps_ would have been informed of Ryder’s brother’s hostage situation.

Sehun placed his head back on his mate’s chest and yanked the blankets closer. It was then when he realized that he had indeed turned Kai’s bed into their nest. No one else was allowed in here. It was theirs. This sort of primal need and instinct was not new to him, but it was finally in full swing. Even the mere idea of letting someone else into this safe, small nest unnerved Sehun greatly.

Kai had not been himself last night. He almost had a breakdown. He kept saying that everything was ruined now. Ryder would not stand by and watch his brother be put in harm’s way by the bloody Rexits. He was so worried about provoking Ryder. Sehun had not been able to comprehend much as he was overwrought by Kai’s forcing him to leave. Leave. Leave where? Kai said anywhere. As long as it was far away from him. That was the one thing Sehun thought he could not do at all right now. Kai was his and he was Kai. Even Kai’s brief absence after they had mate had caused him a great agony.

He could only image how Hana must have felt when she lost Geun. Or how Kali must have suffered following the death of his Soulbinder.

He pitied them all. He really wished that there was something that he could do. Something to keep Kai save. To keep all those, who bound their souls involuntarily to those they were not supposed to, safe.

In the end, Sehun was not sure when they had tired of the discussion. But he woke in Kai’s arms once more hours later. Safe and sound. For now.

He remembered the first time they had slept together. It was at the sleepover. Kai was the first to fall asleep. Or so he wanted Sehun to believe. Either way, Sehun had laid awake for a while to watch the wolf pup sleep. Kai was a quiet sleeper. His nose twitched sometimes when he had dreams. The next morning, he would ask Sehun if he had done anything embarrassing in his sleep that had bothered Sehun.

Of course, Sehun had said yes. All the time. Even when Kai had done nothing. He would tell Kai that he snored. Really loud. And he kicked and jumped. Then he told Kai that he mumbled something humiliating, like how he had a crush on their Math teacher. Kai, all red-faced, would say sorry.

Oh, what Sehun would give to get those days back.

The knock on the door woke Kai up. His hand found the small of Sehun’s back and gave it a gentle stroke, just to make sure that Sehun was made known of his awakening. Sehun sighed and raised his head from Kai’s chest.

Kai brought a hand to a side of Sehun’s face and cupped his cheek, thumb lightly caressing the cheekbone. “Your eyes are all swollen,” he whispered in a hoarse, sleepy voice.

Sehun lowered his head and buried his face in the crook of Kai’s neck. “I don’t want to leave you,” he mewled softly.

Kai said nothing.

The second knock brought them both up. “Coming,” Kai called out before he climbed out of the nest of blankets and walked over to the door. Opening it, he blinked at his mother, whose face was ridden with a dire expression.

“I need you to come with me, Kai,” she said. “Now. We must talk.”

Kai glanced back at Sehun before looking at his mother again. “Can I take a shower first?”

“We’re going for a run. All of us.”

Kai stared at her curiously. “Mom, if it’s about Noah—”

“We’ll talk later. I will wait for you downstairs.”

As she turned away, Kai shut the door and huffed heavily, rubbing his eyes. Sitting up, Sehun looked at him with glassy eyes.

“All of us… does not include me, does it?” he asked in a whisper.

Kai shook his head. “She means as a pack.” He peeled his T-shirt off and walked into the bathroom. Sehun followed.

“What do you think she wants to talk about?”

Kai bent over the sink and splashed some water onto his face. Then gripping the edges of the sink, he took a few deep breaths. “I don’t know. She has not… transformed in a while. Which means she wants to talk to us without…”

“Me listening?”

Kai did not answer as he grabbed the towel and dried his face. Sehun stepped aside, head hung.

“Is this all… happening because of me?” he asked, voice breaking.

Kai stopped and faced him with a pair of furrowed brows. He then cupped Sehun’s face in his hands and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “We all just want to keep you safe, Sehun. That is… what my dad tried to do, too.”

“I feel like I’m always a burden to you.”

Kai brushed his lips against Sehun’s eyes, one by one, to kiss the tears away. Then he proceeded to kiss Sehun all over the face, saving the lips for the last. The kiss felt sad. Sehun almost broke into a sob.

Somehow, he felt that Kai had made up his mind. And he was not going to like the Alpha’s decision.

“I’ll be back soon.” With that, Kai hurried out of the bedroom, wearing only his sweatpants.

Sehun clutched at the shirt by his chest and swallowed a few times to push down the nauseating lump in his throat. Then unable to keep it down any longer, he rushed to the toilet where he heaved.

Tears streamed down his cheeks as he dropped onto the floor. He hugged his knees to his chest and coughed a couple of times.

* * *

“What are you doing here?”

“Shit!” Taeyong rasped as he caught the frying pan before it could slip from his fingers. “You scared me!”

“Sorry,” Sehun mumbled and took a seat at the table. He smelled fried eggs. He would like to have some fried eggs. And toast. And pickles. He was starved.

“I’m making breakfast,” said Taeyong. “for us.”

Sehun cocked an eyebrow at his friend. “Yeah, I can see that. But why?”

“Hana insisted that I stayed the night. So, I did. The others have gone,” he said, walking over to the table to hand Sehun his plate. “For a run, I guess.”

Sehun pursed his lips.

“And Sara had to hurry back for work, so I came over to see if you’re still alive. Then you know what happened.” He plumped into a seat next to Sehun. “You okay? You look a little pale.”

Sehun shook his head. “I think Kai is thinking of sending me away.”

“What?”

“He thinks I’m in danger.”

“Why? Because of what happened last night?”

“You don’t understand, Taeyong,” Sehun sighed. “Noah… God, I hope he’s all right.”

“Since when do you care about your competition?”

Sehun rubbed his temples. His head hurt a little. “I don’t want anything bad to happen to him.”

Taeyong exhaled heavily. “You know, while we’re sharing, there is… something I need to tell you.”

Sehun looked at him curiously. “What is it?”

“Um…” Taeyong leaned closer and continued in a whisper. “Now, I can be wrong about this; it was kind of dark last night. But…”

“But what?”

Taeyong hesitated to answer, his cheeks turning into a warm shade of pink. Then gnawing at his lower lip, he said, “I _think_ … I almost kissed Jaehyun last night.”

Sehun blinked at him. “What do you mean… you _think_?”

“I don’t know! I told you. It was dark, and he was all mopey. He came close, but nothing happened. He pulled away. I don’t know.” He shot up from the chair and returned to the other side of the kitchen island.

Sehun scratched the back of his head. “Well, did you want to kiss him?”

“No!” Taeyong was quick to answer. His face was flushed red now. “I did not. Have you even met him? He’s a bit of a jerk!”

Sehun shrugged and turned his attention to the plate. He was too hungry for a conversation right now. As he scarfed down the eggs and the bread like an animal, Taeyong watched him with a grimace.

“Wow, you’re hungry,” he remarked.

“Do you find Jaehyun attractive?” Sehun asked.

“Can we stop talking about this?”

“Hey, you brought it up.”

Taeyong turned his back to Sehun. “It would be wrong, wouldn’t it? For a human and a wolf to…”

Sehun paused then. “Not wrong as long as you don’t… take it too far.”

“And what would that be?”

“You know what that would be, Taeyong. I’m a real-life example, am I not?”

The backdoor swung open then and Don burst into the kitchen along with Chanri. Behind them, Jeni, Jaehyun and Yixing followed. Don and Jaehyun were the only ones who strutted into the house without a single piece of clothing on.

Taeyong looked away as soon as his eyes landed on Jaehyun.

Sehun had gotten quite used to it.

Especially Jaehyun who loved walking around naked after a transformation, as though to parade around proudly.

He wandered over to where Taeyong was standing and reached for the top shelf to grab a glass. Taeyong swallowed hard and kept his gaze low as Jaehyun leaned past him to fill the glass with some tap water.

“Excuse me,” said Jaehyun in a mocking tone.

Clearing his throat, Taeyong murmured, “How’s your shoulder?”

“Better.” With a smirk, Jaehyun wandered out of the kitchen, taking a sip of his water. Taeyong finally breathed again.

Sehun wondered where Kai and Hana were. He rose from the table and made his way to the backdoor. He found two white wolves, one significantly bigger and younger than the other, in the backyard. Hana rubbed her head under Kai’s jaw, a sign of affection. But the song between them was woeful. Hana’s in particular. Sehun could not quite make out what the words that were shared between them were, but he realized that the melody was sorrowful, grief-stricken. The was a splash of the colour of melancholy around them.

Kai nudged his head against his mother’s to return the affection, howling and whining softly. Sehun wondered what the exchange was all about.

A son would always be a pup to a mother. No matter how old he was. Sehun missed his mother in that moment.


	41. Chapter 41

“So, what’s the plan now?” asked Taeyong from he sat next to Sehun on the porch steps.

The morning was quieter than usual. The air was heavy, the wind carried a familiar scent with it, and the sky was ominously dark. It would rain soon. Maybe even a storm.

“I don’t know,” said Sehun. “It won’t be long before the _Princeps_ would show up.”

“And shit will hit the fan then?”

“Possibly,” Sehun muttered, hanging his head. “Yes.”

Taeyong heaved a sigh, rubbing his nape. “You should not be here when that happens, Sehun. You’re not an animal like them. They can handle themselves in a fight. You can’t.”

“Yes, I can,” Sehun said defensively, even though he knew that he had little to no chance of fighting against a single wolf. But he could not help it. Even as a child, he had never shied away from a fight. He had hated bullies, and he still did.

However, even as he said it, something tugged at his heart. Perhaps this would be the first time that he would stay back and stay silent. Was it survival instinct? One that Sehun did not think he had before?

“No, you can’t,” replied Taeyong, placing a hand on Sehun’s shoulder. “Look. I know that you’re no coward. But you should not be a hindrance to Kai or anyone in there.”

Sehun raised his head and blinked at his friend. He jumped a little in his seat when a lightning split the sky in half as a deafening thunder chased it. “What do you mean… hindrance?”

Giving the shoulder a gentle squeeze, Taeyong said, “They can’t fight if they are too busy protecting you. Maybe Kai has a point here. You leaving this place might be the best decision for all parties.”

Sehun frowned. “I don’t think I can… stay away from him. Not when I had just… gotten him back.”

“I understand. But you cannot be stubborn in a situation like this, Sehun. I don’t want you getting hurt or… worse. Have you guys talked?”

“Not since last night,” said Sehun, eyes closed momentarily as he tried to calm his pounding heart. “I am… afraid of talking to him. He sounded very determined last night.”

Taeyong shook his head disappointedly. “You wolves are so complicated.” He rose to his feet. “I have to get going now. But if you need anything, I’m only a phone call away. And… if you decide to… leave Oakenbury for a while, you can always ask Sara for a favour. She’d be happy to have you.”

Sehun nodded. “Maybe don’t come around here for a while. Until things cool off.”

“Right.” As he turned around and started marching down the steps, the front door swung open and Jaehyun stepped out with his hands balled into fists.

“Get inside,” he spat at Sehun furiously. “From this moment, you don’t step out of the house. Understood?”

Standing up, Sehun faced Jaehyun with a frown. “What’s wrong?”

“Just get the fuck inside.”

“Do you always have to be so rude?” interrupted Taeyong then, eyebrows furrowed into a scowl.

Jaehyun turned to him with a scowl twice as hard. “Yes. And _you_. Get out of my face.”

“Oh, _now_ you want me to get out of your face?” scoffed Taeyong. “Fine. If that’s what you want.”

As he began to walk away, Jaehyun stopped to stare at him, his hard expression softening immediately, as though he had received a slap to the face.

“Uh… I…” Jaehyun then stuttered, licking his lips and scratching the back of his head as Taeyong stomped over to his car.

He stood there, still fumbling for words, gawking at Taeyong drive away. Then exhaling heavily, he turned to Sehun again. As he grabbed Sehun’s arm with more force than necessary, Sehun winced and brought a hand to Jaehyun’s chest to shove him back.

Releasing the arm, Jaehyun glowered at him, grinding his teeth.

“What _is_ your problem, Jaehyun?!”

“Get inside.”

“No, I don’t want to.” Sehun flinched away when Jaehyun tried to grab his arm once more. “I want to talk. With you. I know that you don’t like me. It was fine when we were kids, but now, it’s just getting really old. I have never treated you badly. What have I done so wrong that you hate me so much?”

Jaehyun only stared at him in response, lips pressed into a tight line. Then rolling his eyes, he turned to the door. Walking back inside, he slammed the door shut behind him.

Sehun let him go. This was not the time for an argument after all. Besides, he needed to have a talk with Kai instead.

Little raindrops began to pitter-patter on the ground. Sehun went inside after a couple of minutes. Jeni was sulking on the couch in the living room with her legs pulled up. She seemed to be close with Noah. The concern and worry were clear in her dreadful expression.

Sehun took a seat next to her on the couch. “Are you all right?”

It took her a moment to respond. When she did, she sounded so devastated that it broke Sehun’s heart. “No,” she let out, tears and fear glistening in her eyes. “I’m scared for him. We don’t know what has happened to him.”

Sehun put an arm around her. Jeni leaned against him. Wolves often found comfort in physical affection. It was a beautiful thing they did. Sehun might not be a shifter, but he still owned some wolf traits. So, he knew how important this proximity was to a wolf.

“Everything will be all right,” he said unconvincingly. He did not know if everything would be all right. He knew nothing. That was what driving him crazy. He had never been in a limbo like this where nothing was certain before. “I know Kali and the Rexits. They wouldn’t hurt Noah.”

“Sehun,” called Hana as she walked into the living room. “Can I have a word with my daughter?”

Sehun looked up at her. She was not smiling. Her pale face was painful to look at. There was something grieving her. And Sehun was not sure if it were only her concern for Noah’s safety.

As he pulled away from Jeni, Hana sat down and wrapped her arms around her shivering daughter. “We must be strong, darling,” she said, pressing a kiss to the girl’s head. “We _are_ strong. With or without your father.”

With a sob in his throat, Sehun left them to give them their privacy and made his way upstairs. He did not know if he were ready to have a conversation with Kai right now. If he were determined to either leave or stay, he would have the right answers. But as for now, he did not know what the right thing to do was. Taeyong had made a good point. While Sehun wanted to stay, he knew he would be in Kai’s way, and possibly Kai’s family’s way, too. He did not want to be a _hindrance_ to anyone, if he hadn’t become one already. He should not have to be another reason for them to suffer.

If going away would make things easier for Kai, then Sehun supposed he had no other option. But there were just so many uncertainties attached to that decision that even thinking of staying away from Kai made Sehun’s windpipe close and head spin.

The other alternative would be to stay and make everything worse than it already was.

Not much of a decision to make, was it? All that mattered now was how selfish Sehun could be.

When he reached the top of the stairs, he stopped to peer into the room from where he heard a baby’s playful coos. He found Yixing perched on the bed with his son bouncing on his lap, arms stretched out, hands trying to reach for the stuffed dolphin his father was holding up.

“You want it?”

The baby cooed again and clenched his hands, trying to grab the little dolphin that was out of his reach. He looked upset and amused at the same time.

“You can come in, Sehun,” Yixing said without looking up at Sehun to acknowledge his presence.

Swallowing, Sehun sauntered into the bedroom. The baby’s cot was right next to the bed on which Sehun assumed Yixing slept on.

Handing Nova the dolphin at last, Yixing patted the space on the bed next to him. “Sit.”

“No, it’s okay,” muttered Sehun, keeping his eyes on the baby, who was hugging the stuffed animal, putting its nose in his mouth. “Can I… hold him?”

Smiling, Yixing raised the baby. “Of course.”

Sehun’s heart started beating hard and fast as he took the baby into his arms. Nova smelled so good. So good that Sehun wanted to rub the baby all over himself. The baby was not afraid of him. But it did look curious for a while, pressing a hand to a side of Sehun’s face.

“He is so adorable,” Sehun let out, tears stinging his eyes a little. He quickly blinked them away before they could fall.

“Funny thing, parenthood,” scoffed Yixing. “Didn’t think I would even want a child. Especially with someone who did not… love me. But he’s the best thing to ever happen to me. And I would kill _and_ die for him. I can understand my dad better now.”

Sehun gave the baby’s chubby cheek a kiss before half-heartedly handing him back to his father. “Can I ask you something?”

Yixing smiled again. “I know what you’re going to ask me, Sehun. Honestly, I don’t think I have the answer. Everything is out of _our_ hands now. All that we can do is either… prepare for a fight… or run and hide.”

Sehun frowned deeply. “Do you really think that the _Princeps_ would come after you for what happened to Noah?”

Yixing was hesitant to answer that.

“You can tell me, Yixing.”

Sighing, he then nodded. “They already suspect it.”

“It?”

“You. Being a part of us.”

 _Being a part of us_ … Sehun almost dropped to his knees right then and there and broke into tears. It was all that he had ever wanted.

“But for some reason, Ryder hadn’t acted on it. One of the reasons might be that Noah was to be part of our pack. Now, if he finds out that we did absolutely nothing to protect him, he would take the hint.”

“What do you mean? What… hint?”

“That Noah can’t be a part of our pack,” sighed Yixing. “We care for him, yes. And most of us like him. But to be Kai’s mate… to be part of _this_ pack, this family… I believe that position has already been filled.”

The way Yixing had smiled Sehun in that moment nearly made Sehun swoon. He could no longer hide the tears in his eyes.

“You’re bound to Kai. Kai is still bound to this pack,” Yixing added. “Thus, you’re a part of this pack now. Which means, we are going to protect _you_. As long as you’re here, we can’t help but fight for you. Ryder will find that out. Then he has no reason to maintain this alliance with us.”

It hit Sehun then. “Unless… I leave all of you.”

Yixing lowered his head. “The other Regnandis will hear of this, Sehun. And when they show up, they are not going to show any mercy to the Rexits or the Aequuses who aided them. You’re on the top of the list. Now, who do you think are going to put their necks on the line to protect you when the Regnandis come for you?”

Sehun let a tear fall and roll down his cheek. “I… don’t want… any of you to… suffer because of me.”

“I know.” Yixing clenched his eyes for a moment. “It pains us all to ask you of this, Sehun. But in the end, it is _your_ decision. As a pack, we will stand by it.”

Sehun walked out of the room and approached Kai’s bedroom. The door was open. Entering the room, Sehun shut the door behind him and looked to Kai who was sitting on the edge of the bed, slouched and lost in his thoughts.

He had not moved or undone the nest of blankets Sehun had unconsciously made last night on the bed.

“How are you feeling?” Kai asked without raising his head. His hair looked damp and he was not wearing a shirt. He must have just taken a shower.

“Are you asking about the Calor?” Sehun muttered, slowly walking towards him. “I’m… fine.”

He tried not to let his voice break.

Kai was not looking up at him.

Sehun knelt down on the floor and raised a hand to Kai’s knee. “Kai,” he called softly, tears welling up in his eyes. “If me… staying away from you is the best… for all of us, then… I am willing to—”

“I go wherever you go,” Kai cut him off, eyes still kept low, refusing to look at Sehun.

Sehun blinked. “Wh-What?”

He looked up and met Sehun’s gaze with a pair of bloodshot eyes. “I go wherever you go. That was what I promised you.”

Sehun was not sure what that meant, so he kept mum, his breathing shallow.

“We could leave,” Kai then said in a low voice. He sounded reluctant. “I could leave… everything and everyone behind. This is… my problem. I cannot ask them to take the risk with me.”

Sehun’s heart broke at that. “I don’t want to be your… problem, Kai.”

“That’s not what I meant. But I want to be with you, Sehun.”

“But you cannot be without your pack either.” Sehun took hold of Kai’s hands.

“I will have no option but to… leave them… again.” Even as he said it, the agony in his voice sounded like it was suffocating him.

Sehun shook his head. “You cannot do that to them. You can’t do that to Hana again.”

“She was the one who suggested it,” he said. “She said that… she would learn to live with it. It’s our only option to stay together.”

“Then we don’t have to stay together,” Sehun said, tears streaking his cheeks. “I don’t want to take you away from your pack. All I want is to be a part of it. But I do not want to be anybody’s problem.”

“Sehun—”

Sehun rose to his full height and wiped his cheeks. “I will leave, Kai. Before Ryder and the other Regnandis get here.”

Kai jolted up from the bed and caught Sehun’s wrist. “Sehun—”

“Your father sacrificed himself so that you could return to your family. It can’t go in vain. I cannot be selfish.”

He pulled his wrist free from Kai’s grip and hurried out of the room.


End file.
